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Man and Dude and Bro (& co.)

Noodle said:
Some butch lesbians like to use the word dude.

How does that fit into your worldview jammy?

:)
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Hehe one of my good friends is a straight woman who's nevertheless not the most traditionally feminine of chicks, and she gets away with calling female friends of hers 'man' and 'dude'. When she does it it's hysterical and cute.
 
Jamshyd said:
discopupils said:
I think it's because many gay guys (well, you and me, anyway) have realised that they don't have to constantly assert their own gender identity - considering "bro" etc. seem to be things that people with a masculine gender identity say.
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Which hits bullseye, if you ask me...
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I mean this in the most friendly way, bro:

You're both reading waaaaaay too far into it. You're not some special, highly evolved, gender neutral person who is above common colloquialisms and terms of endearment between friends. Get over yourselves. :p

As if ANY of this behavior is derived from a need to constantly assert one's gender. What a steaming load of crap.

;)
 
MyDoorsAreOpen said:
Hehe one of my good friends is a straight woman who's nevertheless not the most traditionally feminine of chicks, and she gets away with calling female friends of hers 'man' and 'dude'.
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Hehe this sounds like me, except replace the words "calling female friends" with "calling all friends and family" :D
 
If a chick calls me "man" or "dude" I immediately think she's giving me 'friend' vibes and I don't have a shot of sleeping with her. :(
 
I have a lovely friend who calls me "kiddo" sometimes, and while I love him to death, I find it extremely patronising when he does this. So I choose to ignore it :\
 
Kyk said:
If a chick calls me "man" or "dude" I immediately think she's giving me 'friend' vibes and I don't have a shot of sleeping with her. :(
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When a chick calls me man or dude, I think it's because she wants to fuck me and is trying to get me to pursue her more by teasing my in a patronizing way.


Well not always, I guess it all depends on the way she says it.
 
I speak Arabic as a 1st langauge but in day to day life as an Israeli-Jew spoke Hebrew more than anything, so...the equivalrnt of "Man" or "Dude" would be "Habibi," meaning literally "My Buddy." Like most Israeli-Jews I spent my adult life as a soldier and so I tended to use the word "Achee" more all thing being equal. It means "My Brother." Both words are the same in Hebrew and Arabic.

"Achee" is idiomatically like a Briton saying "Mate."

These days, past 2 years this month actually, I have been mostly speaking 3 Bisayan langauges (Cebuano, Illongo and Hamtik, which is actually better known as Kiniray-a) since my primary residence is on Mindanao in the Philippines.

My relationships there are highly defined and to my huge extended family I am either Kuya (Big Brother) or some other relative term related to my placement within the familial structure.

To men my age, more or less, with whom I have friendly relationships, we do not talk in that casual sense. I find Mindanao to be maybe 100 years behind the reast of that nation. Our employees refer to me as "Don," or "Sir." English is a lingua franca, even in Mindanao now so "Sir" is used by younger employees.

Visiting in NYC now, here people saying "Man" alot, but since I among Jews 99% of the time, and mostly my Clansmen it is all in Arabic, Judeo-Arabic, Ladion (Judeo-Spanish) or Hebrew.

Lot of words for a simple question, but there is the answer.

(Edited for spelling)
 
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On Jam iniating spirited debate. Jam actually has a point actually. On an academic level gender identity is directly tied to language utilisation on EVERY level. One way in which to observe it on a very basic level is on a segmented interpersonal dynamic like male on male casual relationships within a given culture.

In other words, American males engaing one another like,"Dude! NOOOOO!!! Dude, you must be fuc*ing shi**ing me Dude!!!"

That phrasing, in that example is clearly a youn heterosexual male over compensating with gender identification in a male on male interaction. Adolescent males are among the most insecure of all sexual beings. This is very basic stuff and if Jam was speaking from an inquisitive point of view he should be applauded because he nailed it.

I know that outside of academic it sounds like alot of cock and bull (no pun intended hahah) but the truth is the truth...in so far as accepted theory goes anyway.

I put stock in it myself.
 
alternatively, i'm very adept at advancing the frontiers of non-descriptive nouns to address people. i rarely ayo or yo anymore, i usually change bro to bromeo, dog to doggie, man to manye, dude to bro, rinse later and repeat. about ever six months i try to change up my catch phrases after everyone else has already disseminated them and started using them themselves, then i have a very spiritual experience where get drunk, go online and go in the new jersey aim chatroom's to test out my new shit on my 12/45yr old pedo-captive audiences.

nothing to really understand about it, just bullshit artistry at work
 
i actually use dude, man, bro, etc. as barriers in real life. when i meet someone i'll say "nice to meet you jim," but anytime after that until i have that "breakthrough" conversation, they're name doesn't get spoken by me. it's not a show of disrespect, but a lack of confidence by me. i don't feel comfortable calling someone by their first name or even their last name unless specifically told to do so and even then, until i get to know them better i still won't address them by name. i feel like by doing that, i'm opening a gate to a relationship that's simply not there yet. not that it won't be later, but until i feel like i know someone well enough to call them by name, they get the dude, man, bro treatment.

i think of it as impersonal because it is. again it's not to be rude, but it is what it is. i don't know them so i don't address them personally until i do.
 
One that I hate though, is the English word "Dude." I served 34 months in the NJ state prison system and it seems like alot of black men, at least back then (latter half of the 90s), believed whites were fond of the word. They also had a way of saying it that was annoying to no end.
 
I couldn't stand all the junior high football coaches calling every freakin player 'son' or 'boy'...I find it quite demeaning when another adult calls me 'boy' nowadays. That includes the quite trendy "boi" I hate that word lol

EDIT: A jamaican friend of mine calls any young kid he's around 'son.' "eyyyyy sonnnn" is the first thing out of his mouth LOL. Maybe I'm thinking too much into that, but only one person should be calling me son. Maybe it's cuz I have issues with my dad. Who knows
 
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