Heroin/Opioid MEGA-Thread: Junkies check-in here!

[drug_wench]

Thanks for the advice drug_wench! I'll have to try apricots and prunes! A cup of coffee and a cig sometimes give me the urge...its hit or miss with me! hit or miss seems to be the theme of my life! LOL!

yes, any stimulant like nicotine or caffeine helps!
no-doz pills do wonders if uve bn blocked up for days
i know wat u mean about hit or miss - gd luck!!!!

valium - i know cold turkey is ideal but for some ppl its just.....not possible
id luv to hav bn able to not hav to go thru fucking medical detox all those times - its not exactly fun - but im an epileptic and coming off opiates esp strong ones and strong doses like my last relapse on heroin, r almost guaranteed to cause seizures

fucking sucks - and i take suboxone just cos i know since ive bn on valium ive had crazily loosened inhibitions.....and i wont b off valium for ages cos ive got to taper off 40mg and im doing it dropping 1mg a fortnight (again due to the epilepsy)
loosened inhibitions for me = abusing opiates unfortunately

as soon as i switched from rivotril to valium i started abusing codeine, then oxy, then finally heroin and ended up doing my 5th inpatient opiate detox
the nurses were all trying to push methadone on me cos technically my frequent relapses cost the govt money (detox is funded by the govt here) and i was started at 32mg suboxone this time and it still wasnt holding me properly

i was sick and tired of going thru it so thats why i chose to stabilise on suboxone and leave 2 weeks early (if id reduced from 32 - 0mg subs inpatient id hav had to stay for a month, that or detox using methadone and switch to subs in the community, then finish detoxing at home with a nurse coming by daily to check on me and give me my meds)

ive never tasted methadone but ive kissed a guy whod just had his dose and that was fucking disgusting enough, not to mention suboxone has less of a stigma cos most kiwis dont know wtf it is
also ive never met any junkie thats managed to get off done (except the NA lot) whereas ive got off subs many times over so im happy with my choice really.....doesnt interfere with my life in any way

bah sorry im talking too much - guess wat im basically trying to say is, gd on u if u can go CT and stay clean, but i know i cant, and im glad ive found something that works for me

ive so far gone without using needles since i last posted in here but i can feel the need to slam coming on
im trying to hold off by spending lots of time with my bf and friends - wen i dosed today at the pharmacy, the chemist said 'ur not using again r u?' (i was hot so i was wearing a t-shirt)
i told him about my sterile water thing and he took a look at the veins in my arms and said 'u really cant use anymore of these veins or theyll end up collapsing by the look of them'
i decided not to mention that i was banging into my legs and feet

 

[null_null]

at one point i had a 1-2mg/day bupe habit (intranasally).
this doesnt sound much but when i ran out i had
really really bad wd symptoms after like 36 hrs.

 

[formanchristopher]

Keep coming back!!

i guess i'll check in here and subscribe...im mike..from southern california near san diego kinda.

hi everyone

im still a daily methadone/h user ..been using a little less lately tho and tapering off the methadone so things are lookin up. i havent read that much of this thread yet but ill get on to it soon and subscribe..

just wanted to say hey whats up

Hey Yeah Yeah,
You'll find this site as addicting as dope, watch and see! I swear there's no better "addict type" site on the planet, and what's best is anything goes!!
Question? Why get off the methadone? Why not maintenance? If I heard/read you correctly, you are still using heroin WHILE on methadone, so believe me...you aren't finished yet (said with concern, ok?). Or maybe Suboxone, to avoid all that Clinic bullshit every morning? It works great for me!!!
Feel free to write, and I wish you the best!

Keep coming back, it works.:D

 

[formanchristopher]

Needle fixation

I have never admitted it before but i think i have a slight needle fixation.
I know its weird but i love injecting. Not just the high from the drug,i enjoy the actual process off injecting. I sit there and just pull blood in and out for ages. I haven't yet resorted to injecting water but i will do the tiniest bit of gear thats not even gonna do anything,i do my filters,the filters of my filters - anything thats got the slightest bit of colour to it.
I shouldn't be injecting at all and i know it. 2 and a half years ago i had to have 3 fingers chopped off through injecting. I had been trying for ages,it'd be in then i'd check and it'd come out,the pin was full off blood and it had congealed. It wasn't liquid anymore it was a wormy paste. But i'd rammed congealed gear in loads of times (stupidly) so when i finally registered that was it,i forced it in. It didn't hurt when i was pushing it in but about 30seconds later all my hand and arm started burning and going numb. I shook it about a bit and ran it under some water and it felt better so i went to sleep. I woke up with the most incredible pain in my arm and hand. I looked at my hand and it was blue i went straight to the hospital but it was too late. According to the doctors i'd injected into an artery and all the congealed shit had destroyed the blood vessels in my fingers,luckily the rest of my hand recovered,i could've lost the whole thing.
I tried smoking my H for a while but i just didn't enjoy it. I craved to inject. So after a year i started injecting again and here i am.
I am on methadone and i think if i could stop injecting i could stop using all together or at least have a much better chance.
Any advice would be appreciated,i need to find a way to make myself hate injecting as much as i hated smoking it.

Drug wench - best of luck giving up and thanks,reading your post has helped me admit my problem.

Hey-
In my 20+ yrs. of shooting dope, I've seen and heard of many, many dif
types of peole who honestly get addicted to just "slamming". Whether it be
coffee, ice-water, sterile water, etc., they do in tell me it's the shooting up
that they are addicted to! So, you are not alone!!!

 

[eon_blue]

Hey-
In my 20+ yrs. of shooting dope, I've seen and heard of many, many dif
types of peole who honestly get addicted to just "slamming". Whether it be
coffee, ice-water, sterile water, etc., they do in tell me it's the shooting up
that they are addicted to! So, you are not alone!!!

say what???

 

[formanchristopher]

Suboxone withdrawls...

at one point i had a 1-2mg/day bupe habit (intranasally).
this doesnt sound much but when i ran out i had
really really bad wd symptoms after like 36 hrs.

My doctor is a guy that will tell you that when it comes to Suboxone withdrawls, it's nothing more than a little flu like symtoms!! WHAT A CROCK OF SHIT!!!!! Suboxone wd's are really hard! Even went thru a Subutex titrate, and
it was still shitty after going down, in a detox center. BEWARE. Or, BE AWARE, is more like it.

Suboxone is a VERY strong drug!!! Long ass half life....

Peace.

 

[formanchristopher]

needle fixations...

say what???

^ Yeah COFFEE!! In the black tar over here (west coast), coffee is a regular "cut" the mexicans use to stretch their product. So, that and the fact that common sense tells you that coffee won't kill you, plus the caffiene, has people doing it. But understand this...I am assuming that it's only when they can't seen to find anything REAL to shoot up. Don't know, because I don't go to those lengths, just commented to Drug_Wench(?) that she wasn't alone.

Drug_Wench...another commonality...women resorting to their legs, feet, wrists, etc. until finally it's nothing but ibto the muscle. You poor women have no love when it comes to having or finding a "rope" like a man, and I think it sucks. Worst case: Having some strung-out chick you don't know, bleeding from a a thousand holes, and asking me if I'll please hit her in the neck?
-----FUCK THAT!----
I've never even hit myself in my own neck. Know anything about that??

The Real Deal, Christopher

 

[Georgie25]

So it's been like 3 days i think since my last post and i relasped twice. Both times getting 2 oc 20's.. I waited a day in between doing them so that's an accomplishment at least. At least now I know I can take breaks and stop when I want too.

 

[formanchristopher]

Definetly a positive thing! I hope it gets better & better for you too. how old r u??

 

[Georgie25]

Definetly a positive thing! I hope it gets better & better for you too. how old r u??

Hey thanks a bunch. I'm 19.

I should also mention that I didn't use the oc20's to get high, I took em before bed to go to sleep and barely even felt it since I usually have to take 80mg to even feel it, so I'm hoping that it doesn't put me all the way back to day 1.
Although right now I am feeling pretty good and not experienceing any w/d symtoms besides feeling tired and just body aches..

I need to go out, sitting inside on the computer isn't exactly helping.
I just have no where to go...

 

[eon_blue]

^ Yeah COFFEE!! In the black tar over here (west coast), coffee is a regular "cut" the mexicans use to stretch their product.

damn, I wasn't aware of that...

you mean to tell me that chances are I've shot up coffee? well fuck me...that'll be one to tell the grandkids.

 

[nukka]

Nah don't worry the coffee will stay on the spoon after you filter it. You didn't IV no coffee

 

[drug_wench]

thanks for the words, christopher

yea im aware suboxone wds r no picnic but its better than using......
and id agree with ur advice to yeahyeahya - although id taper down watever dose ur on of methadone, then switch to suboxone

not cos suboxones particularly easy to get off (tho its easier than methadone from wat ive seen) or even more convenient to take (although i realise it is in the states, which as i said earlier can lead to trouble IMO) but cos u can not use heroin on top of it (unless u really basically go over)....plus it lasts longer than methadone

yea christopher, us ladies r blessed with deeper-set veins in general sadly - mine r particularly deep-set.....i use a 26g fit for my arms and i hav to insert it the whole way to hit the vein (it is rare ill even b able to go thru it unless i insert it at the wrong angle)
still havnt shot any water
(planning to do some tonight tho as the vein running up the back of my left leg is looking ok again - thats me....sensible....)

oh yea id never shoot into my own neck - fuck that.....but i will admit ive had my ex (an experienced injecter but still VERY stupid of me) hit up some meth into that vein for me
it was the stupidest riskiest thing ive ever done but i guess wen uve bn up 2 weeks straight on meth u dont think logically, i was running out of veins and i heard it was a killer high (which it was......but cud hav bn literally so no i am not endorsing it)

 

[Georgie25]

thanks for the words, christopher

yea im aware suboxone wds r no picnic but its better than using......
and id agree with ur advice to yeahyeahya - although id taper down watever dose ur on of methadone, then switch to suboxone

not cos suboxones particularly easy to get off (tho its easier than methadone from wat ive seen) or even more convenient to take (although i realise it is in the states, which as i said earlier can lead to trouble IMO) but cos u can not use heroin on top of it (unless u really basically go over)....plus it lasts longer than methadone

yea christopher, us ladies r blessed with deeper-set veins in general sadly - mine r particularly deep-set.....i use a 26g fit for my arms and i hav to insert it the whole way to hit the vein (it is rare ill even b able to go thru it unless i insert it at the wrong angle)
still havnt shot any water
(planning to do some tonight tho as the vein running up the back of my left leg is looking ok again - thats me....sensible....)

oh yea id never shoot into my own neck - fuck that.....but i will admit ive had my ex (an experienced injecter but still VERY stupid of me) hit up some meth into that vein for me
it was the stupidest riskiest thing ive ever done but i guess wen uve bn up 2 weeks straight on meth u dont think logically, i was running out of veins and i heard it was a killer high (which it was......but cud hav bn literally so no i am not endorsing it)

Yikes, that reminds me of that scene in Christianne F where the dude hops over the stall and steals her rig and shoots in his neck in front of the old lady.

 

[eon_blue]

Nah don't worry the coffee will stay on the spoon after you filter it. You didn't IV no coffee

The actual coffee itself (in it's liquid form) after being mixed with the water would go through the cotton though...bah I don't want to think about it lol.

 

[nukka]

mine r particularly deep-set.....i use a 26g fit for my arms and i hav to insert it the whole way to hit the vein (it is rare ill even b able to go thru it unless i insert it at the wrong angle)
still havnt shot any water
(planning to do some tonight tho as the vein running up the back of my left leg is looking ok again - thats me....sensible....)

wait what?? are you talking about shooting water to help cravings or something or are you using ?

 

[ClubbinGuido]

I finally got on Suboxone. But I feel confused about everything... I just don't know.

 

[Miss Hollywood]

thanks for the words, christopher

yea im aware suboxone wds r no picnic but its better than using......
and id agree with ur advice to yeahyeahya - although id taper down watever dose ur on of methadone, then switch to suboxone

not cos suboxones particularly easy to get off (tho its easier than methadone from wat ive seen) or even more convenient to take (although i realise it is in the states, which as i said earlier can lead to trouble IMO) but cos u can not use heroin on top of it (unless u really basically go over)....plus it lasts longer than methadone

yea christopher, us ladies r blessed with deeper-set veins in general sadly - mine r particularly deep-set.....i use a 26g fit for my arms and i hav to insert it the whole way to hit the vein (it is rare ill even b able to go thru it unless i insert it at the wrong angle)
still havnt shot any water
(planning to do some tonight tho as the vein running up the back of my left leg is looking ok again - thats me....sensible....)

oh yea id never shoot into my own neck - fuck that.....but i will admit ive had my ex (an experienced injecter but still VERY stupid of me) hit up some meth into that vein for me
it was the stupidest riskiest thing ive ever done but i guess wen uve bn up 2 weeks straight on meth u dont think logically, i was running out of veins and i heard it was a killer high (which it was......but cud hav bn literally so no i am not endorsing it)

I feel ya on having shitty deep "girl veins" that are small and so easy to miss! Once I couldn't hit the veins in my arms anymore(which didn't take long), i started shooting in my hands because it was easier to hit because they were closer to the top of my skin. The only problem with shooting in your hands after awhile is A.) It leaves unsightly tracks that can't be covered up B.)Once they start getting crappy from shooting so much they ROLL LIKE CRAZY and it becomes extreamly difficult to successfully administering a shot.

Fuckin sucks bein a chick when your a junkie

I'm on suboxone now. For a lil over 3 months. I miss the needle like crazy.

 

[ilikewater]

hey, What's up?
Venting a little: This thread was just too tempting. I used heroin for a while and I've been off of it for too long. my boyfriend at the time "cut me off" and told my mom all about my drug "habits". I started drinking a lot and not too much later tried to kill myself, living without H isn't my idea of a good time. Needless to say that didn't work and just made me realize how much more I'd rather not live without it. I ended up going to detox and was put on suboxone, which helped at first. Went to in IOP, which was okay for a while. Stopped taking my suboxone because the flavor started to gag me and it wasn't helping me with my cravings any longer (I was taking 8mg 3xday) + constipation was a big issue. I had to see a GI guy who told me to stop taking suboxone because my liver tests came back poorly, which I had already done a couple weeks earlier, the tests liver blood test i had done that day ended up coming back normal, if you find that at all interesting.. GI-guy suggested I start taking methadone instead but thats highly expensive and the closest clinic is an hour and a half away. So I am back to square one - I am basically just shooting anything I can, which isn't very satisfying, looking for something i will not find. Right now i'd do just about anything just for a 20 bag, i'd even settle for morphine. haha oh the hell i brought upon myself.
That was entirely too long.
Any suggestions on how to be happy sober?

*Also,
Congratulations to all of you who have successfully stayed clean and are happy being sober. Coming from a stranger this probably wont mean much, but I hope you realize that you should be incredibly proud of yourself if you aren't already. That is a huge feat and proves strength beyond many peoples' capabilities.
And what is this generalization on "girl veins"? I am a girl and my veins are "phat"

 

[Georgie25]

Idk about the girl veins. All my junkie friends would comment about how they wished they had my arms, which i thought was kinda weird at first before i started shooting dope.
I do a lot of curls and i guess that makes my veins a lot bigger in my arms. If i let my arm hang down to the floor for a little bit you can visually see like tons of veins, some even bigger than the back of the elbow vein.

What ive found to be the worst about heroin withdrawal is not the physical symptoms but the anxiety and depression afterwards.
Idk what to do with my self as I never can enjoy anything anymore