CalicoCatLover
Temporary Ban
- Joined
- Apr 14, 2026
- Messages
- 554
Shooting a speedball may have been the highlight of my life.
I'm just doing the usual, hiding alcoholism because if I don't my life will explode.
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DC Moderators: ghostfreak | VerbalTruist
🌟🌟 Social 🌟🌟 How High Are You? V. The Height of Sophistication
- Thread starter Shinji Ikari
- Start date
I'm just doing the usual, hiding alcoholism because if I don't my life will explode.
Mushoku_Sensei
Bluelighter
200 mg Pregabalin (+100 mg redosed later)
1 mg Clonazepam (on top of the lingering Diazepam I took yesterday)
1 dl White Lotus wine -
put me to sleep in the middle of the day. Glad I never black out, I simply knock out
1 mg Clonazepam (on top of the lingering Diazepam I took yesterday)
1 dl White Lotus wine -
put me to sleep in the middle of the day. Glad I never black out, I simply knock out
koolman69420
Bluelighter
i feel like a concerned mother searching her teens browser history trying to figure out if this is literal or figurative.
ions
Bluelighter
I stopped drinking coffee. Tho I did have one this morning because no red bulls.
foodcrisis
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Jan 2, 2014
- Messages
- 2,129
i've been enjoying cigarettes and weed again like i posted about in the past few pages.
i smoked some weed and was walking on the bike/walking trail through the woods and past people's houses when a lot of people were out, and society affecting my schizophrenia got the best of me.. i started rapping and going on tangents about children being prescribed adderrall being wrong. lol. idk. kind of questionable whether or not i was disturbing the peace. definitely would be to some people. even if i didn't get arrested. someone could've tried to fight me or something..... ... .
it wasn't that i wanted adderall, but it was that the cigarette with the weed at the tip was gonna get me so high and i was thinking about people downplaying the strength of stimulants and how i believe second hand smoke can bother children even when exposed to just a whiff. i get so messed up from cigarettes, i'll be pretty stimulated from smoking the cigarette till i wind down for bed hours later and i barely inhale. if i start to inhale i will get a tolerance and need more obviously, but with how i smoke and cop a buzz, i think kids could be getting bothered getting a whiff of cigarettes passing by someone smoking outside the grocery store or whatever..
i was also thinking about how i went down from 2 to 3 coffees a day, and how i rotate coffee with my coffee addiction.. people aren't gonna like it, but i believe adderall just gets people high for a couple days and then they get a placebo after every time they use it once they are addicted to their standard dose..... i wanted more coffee and was doing body scans recognizing that i didn't really feel bad, but i just wanted to feel GREAT. lol. if i had another cup or two of coffee with the weed, i would've been on top of the world... it's funny, when i'm using drugs and not as high as i like to be i recognize there was always parts in my childhood before using drugs where i was in a worse place. that even if i wasn't in pain, being a child wasn't really that euphoric. it really gets to me. i cry about it all the time. that actually gets me pretty high. that i was feeling perfectly fine. i just want to get fucked up and i don't think i'm hurting myself cause i breath properly with the drugs i use and i don't believe that is the case with children and adderall always.. HAH. i cry about myself a lot. kinds being prescribed adderall pisses me off. lol. and again, i'lll say it wasn't even cause i wanted any.
i got to make sure i don't freak out in public. i like to rap and dance around a lot when i'm walking, but it's chill and peaceful. i got to stop getting into gangster rap mode and do that chill shit. lol i believe i have the right to dance and rap if it's chill/peaceful, but i don't think i should be able to bitch about kids doing adderall in public, even though i wouldn't subject people to medicating children with adderall myself.
anyways. at the turn around point on the trail i had a small water and 10 5mg thc gummies and smoked the cigarettes and took like an hour walk hour home.... when i was home, the gummies kicked in and i did some physical therapy/yoga and it was chill.. i lost my oral fixation for a bong rip like every ten minutes. i smoked like 2 and a half grams of weed total in the day instead of more than an 1/8th and i was perfectly content, sometimes i rip more than 5 grams through the bong. been doing less lately, but i push it.
taking gummies a few hours after having a cigarette when i'm not full addicted to cigarettes is pretty chill to me. i went from doing 30mgs of oral thc to 50mgs and i get a slightly better high with the body buzz a bit more similar to smoking the thc which gets me a bit on edge physically... having a cigarette earlier in the day kind of ampifies the on edge buzz. just laying back and chilling or doing some art or music is a really good time. i don't feel bad nervous, but i feel like i'm high/under the influence, can breath strong, and i also have some energy but can also lay back and chill if i desire..... i can't really smoke cigarettes all the time though. i have to do like a pack or so and then skip a month. i'm hypersensitve and/or schizophrenic. that shit fucks me up... smoking cigarettes with the weed causes me to hallucinate. when i'm going hard into a few packs of cigarettes with out the month break and smoking weed, the last time i did that i was hallucinating a ton of awesome visuals. i can't handle the body high though. i get under the weather and then stimulated from the cigarettes. it doesn't work for me... i can do some stimulants when i'm not as they say under the weather.
i smoked some weed and was walking on the bike/walking trail through the woods and past people's houses when a lot of people were out, and society affecting my schizophrenia got the best of me.. i started rapping and going on tangents about children being prescribed adderrall being wrong. lol. idk. kind of questionable whether or not i was disturbing the peace. definitely would be to some people. even if i didn't get arrested. someone could've tried to fight me or something..... ... .
it wasn't that i wanted adderall, but it was that the cigarette with the weed at the tip was gonna get me so high and i was thinking about people downplaying the strength of stimulants and how i believe second hand smoke can bother children even when exposed to just a whiff. i get so messed up from cigarettes, i'll be pretty stimulated from smoking the cigarette till i wind down for bed hours later and i barely inhale. if i start to inhale i will get a tolerance and need more obviously, but with how i smoke and cop a buzz, i think kids could be getting bothered getting a whiff of cigarettes passing by someone smoking outside the grocery store or whatever..
i was also thinking about how i went down from 2 to 3 coffees a day, and how i rotate coffee with my coffee addiction.. people aren't gonna like it, but i believe adderall just gets people high for a couple days and then they get a placebo after every time they use it once they are addicted to their standard dose..... i wanted more coffee and was doing body scans recognizing that i didn't really feel bad, but i just wanted to feel GREAT. lol. if i had another cup or two of coffee with the weed, i would've been on top of the world... it's funny, when i'm using drugs and not as high as i like to be i recognize there was always parts in my childhood before using drugs where i was in a worse place. that even if i wasn't in pain, being a child wasn't really that euphoric. it really gets to me. i cry about it all the time. that actually gets me pretty high. that i was feeling perfectly fine. i just want to get fucked up and i don't think i'm hurting myself cause i breath properly with the drugs i use and i don't believe that is the case with children and adderall always.. HAH. i cry about myself a lot. kinds being prescribed adderall pisses me off. lol. and again, i'lll say it wasn't even cause i wanted any.
i got to make sure i don't freak out in public. i like to rap and dance around a lot when i'm walking, but it's chill and peaceful. i got to stop getting into gangster rap mode and do that chill shit. lol i believe i have the right to dance and rap if it's chill/peaceful, but i don't think i should be able to bitch about kids doing adderall in public, even though i wouldn't subject people to medicating children with adderall myself.
anyways. at the turn around point on the trail i had a small water and 10 5mg thc gummies and smoked the cigarettes and took like an hour walk hour home.... when i was home, the gummies kicked in and i did some physical therapy/yoga and it was chill.. i lost my oral fixation for a bong rip like every ten minutes. i smoked like 2 and a half grams of weed total in the day instead of more than an 1/8th and i was perfectly content, sometimes i rip more than 5 grams through the bong. been doing less lately, but i push it.
taking gummies a few hours after having a cigarette when i'm not full addicted to cigarettes is pretty chill to me. i went from doing 30mgs of oral thc to 50mgs and i get a slightly better high with the body buzz a bit more similar to smoking the thc which gets me a bit on edge physically... having a cigarette earlier in the day kind of ampifies the on edge buzz. just laying back and chilling or doing some art or music is a really good time. i don't feel bad nervous, but i feel like i'm high/under the influence, can breath strong, and i also have some energy but can also lay back and chill if i desire..... i can't really smoke cigarettes all the time though. i have to do like a pack or so and then skip a month. i'm hypersensitve and/or schizophrenic. that shit fucks me up... smoking cigarettes with the weed causes me to hallucinate. when i'm going hard into a few packs of cigarettes with out the month break and smoking weed, the last time i did that i was hallucinating a ton of awesome visuals. i can't handle the body high though. i get under the weather and then stimulated from the cigarettes. it doesn't work for me... i can do some stimulants when i'm not as they say under the weather.
placebonaut
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Feb 7, 2026
- Messages
- 1,043
270mg Mephedrone
1.5ml of GBL
gonna be some redosing going on here I think!
1.5ml of GBL
gonna be some redosing going on here I think!
placebonaut
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Feb 7, 2026
- Messages
- 1,043
yup, another 2ml GBL and urgh 400mg of drone
ageingpartyfiend
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Mar 5, 2011
- Messages
- 8,868
perhaps start writing down your doses
we always did that when g was getting combined with stims, very helpful, take care
placebonaut
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Feb 7, 2026
- Messages
- 1,043
I always do, I keep a log of everything. this has been through the day redosing GBL every hour or so ~0.7ml and snorting drone as and when. it's not too bad for 6 hours really
Mushoku_Sensei
Bluelighter
Today Ii took my very last 25 mg Hydroxyzine and
240 mg Dihydrocodeine in sevetal doses.. Got that for the first time and tried to dissolve it, too, but it just won't
.
I'm running out of Kratom and need to cover a few weeks more. That caused a certain urge to try/buy whatever now, before I'm in for regular drug testing... I've had worse ideas than DHC
... And it made me re-appreciate the fact that Kratom is much easier on the intestinal system than classical opioids... Also I was clearly over the top, working in the garden for hours like a fury with my temper even worse than normal... Not sure how to proceed from here, but I guess I'm cured for now.
240 mg Dihydrocodeine in sevetal doses.. Got that for the first time and tried to dissolve it, too, but it just won't
.I'm running out of Kratom and need to cover a few weeks more. That caused a certain urge to try/buy whatever now, before I'm in for regular drug testing... I've had worse ideas than DHC
... And it made me re-appreciate the fact that Kratom is much easier on the intestinal system than classical opioids... Also I was clearly over the top, working in the garden for hours like a fury with my temper even worse than normal... Not sure how to proceed from here, but I guess I'm cured for now.