Is there any stimulant out there that is actually more potent than MDPV.
One man's meat is another man's poison. There is no "most addictive/euphoric/whatever" drug. Even the drugs that are typically considered "most addictive" are hardly universally so.
It's not even particularly helpful to think of drugs as *causing* addiction. And before people come at me, I was quite the enthusiastic little junkster in my day lol--nothing exceptional, but definitely enough! lol
I took wads of cash out my dad's fire safe to go to get bricks entirely for personal use from, err, I'll call him "Flaco". At my worst I was shooting a bundle at a time. I would take atenolol and some Klonopin so that I could eat Adderall until my vision whited out--yes, you can do that with dextroamphetamine. Doing a bundle per shot (NY/NJ in early 2000s) was no problem.
Now, fast forward to around 2012-2013 Some idiot moved into the flophouse I was living in, and he didn't have a mattress. Unbeknownst to us, he dragged some random thing in off the street. Well, he brought scabies and bedbugs into the damn house. I got bitten on one of my nuts, and it got infected. It was the most pain I have ever experienced. I was crying like a little child, begging "please help me". The resident looked me in the eyes and said "Don't worry, I GOT U." He made a gesture with his hand, and a nurse hung a bag of morphine, programmed the pump, and hooked it up to my catheter. The. dose was *HIGH*. I was nodding out all over the place at first lol. It was so bad that they actually convened a meeting of all the doctors on staff in that unit in some room (I saw them file in and out). Then he told me that they were discussing whether they should have me airlifted to a trauma center, because although they could do the surgery at that hospital if they had to, they didn't want to risk f-ing anything up because ... testicles. So he told me that they were just gonna keep me blitzed on morphine for 24 hours. blast me with as much vancomycin and some other IV antibiotic as they could, and "cross their fingers" that I wouldn't need surgery. I thought that seemed like a pretty good plan, cuz getting my nutsack cut open is something I've never been in a hurry to have happen, even under anesthesia. Well, it worked. I literally cried the next day thanking him, it was like 70%+ better.
So the reason I'm telling you this is because at that time, it had already been a year or two at least since I last used dope. See, I have treatment-resistant depression and really bad ADHD. There was a doctor in the public health system here who was also a psychopharmacology professor at the state medical school, and he actually cared enough to put me on 90mg/day of Nardil + 60mg/day of Dexedrine (it took 1.5 years to titrate the dose up that high because, you know, MAOI lol). That is oldschool shit that almost noone does anymore. Now he knew my drug history. But his deal with me was this:
"OK, I don't treat addicts. Its not that I have anything against them. It's that there are a lot of people out there who need someone who is gonna really TREAT them, and that is why I am in this business. So if you wanna use all these drugs, that's your choice. Just go take up one of the mediocre doctors' time, because I don't have it."
Of course, all I could do was thank him and say "I'll do whatever you want". And I meant it. So this is what he wanted: "OK. The licensing board is gonna wanna fry me when they see that I am prescribing the maximum off-label dose of dexedrine plus a fairly high dose of an irreversible MAOI TO a drug addict. I. would rather not deal with the deluge of phone calls that I'm about to get about this, but I know you need it and that there is no one else would ever touch this with a 10-foot pole. Therefore, this is what I am offering you:
-- You are no longer a drug addict in my book. I am wiping the slate clean. Whatever you did in the past will not influence what I prescribe you, how I view you, or anything.
-- Prepare to be drug tested. And I'm telling you right now, if you use, I WILL find out. You are a bad liar, but I'm also gonna request the absolute lowest cutoffs I can on these tests. You aren't just taking an ordinary GC/MS drug screen now. These are MY urine drug screens. I am going to call you at random times during the week, and tell you to come in. If you miss one without a good reason, we're done. I will NOT give you a second chance, because this IS your second chance. You are going to be drug tested as often as I feel I need to to be sure there's nothing in that plasma of yours that shouldn't be. It could be up to three times a week, but plan on twice for the forseeable future. This will continue until I am satisfied.
-- I'm sure you've been able to skirt drug tests before, because I know you know some pharmacology and how to manipulate people. I don't think you're stupid enough to REALLY think you can do that with me, but we'll see. Ball's in your court now. Good luck.
And that was the end of my junkie career. Done. Passed every single drug test. Never failed a drug since then. The prospect of never having access to the only meds that ever worked was so frightening it wasn't even difficult. So years later when I was in the hospital and HAD to have morphine, I was kinda nervous. And what happened stunned me:
I just didn't like it. I was wrecked on morphine (which is the same thing as being wrecked on heroin, really), and I didn't like it. I felt the same buzz, everything--it felt good. But it just didn't do it for me the way it used to. I actually was annoyed I was all spaced out and couldn't hit on the radiologist lol. When I was in my hospital bed, it was pleasant, to say thje least, but I would have felt better not being on it. Seriously. I was mindblown. I didn't even think that was a thing for me.
I know I'm long-winded, so I'll stop. This is my point: don't forget that the notion of "addiction" is meaningless without an environment, a life, etc. It is not something that happens to you. It is something you DO. It is, in effect, a choice. And talking about it as if it's like irreligious demon possession or something misses the mark because there is so much more involved. This isn't to say that it isn't ever a fight, or easy, or anything like that. What I'm saying is that it is all too easy to abstract away the real life, human aspect of this and get lost in the world of receptors and ligands and allosteric modulators and downregulation and cAMP and .. That is not he world we LIVE in.
I have *no* doubt that part of the reason I was able to do that is because I decided that there is absolutely no way I am gonna spit in the face of someone who was literally bending over backwards to help me in such a consequential way. It helped so much to know that he believed in me enough to go there. This was a clinic that took charity care and medicaid. His schedule was always 100% booked. He had no obligation to see me whatsoever. In fact, his schedule was technically completely booked according to the computer, but he overrode it.
