• BASIC DRUG
    DISCUSSION
    Welcome to Bluelight!
    Posting Rules Bluelight Rules
    Benzo Chart Opioids Chart
    Drug Terms Need Help??
    Drugs 101 Brain & Addiction
    Tired of your habit? Struggling to cope?
    Want to regain control or get sober?
    Visit our Recovery Support Forums
  • BDD Moderators: Keif’ Richards

Opioids Shame and scared of buprenorphine

pnillyg

Bluelighter
Joined
May 3, 2024
Messages
823
So in the past I’ve gone on bupe. At the time didn’t know anything about medicine but I do now. I can’t get off this 15mg daily of oxycodone (5mg x 3). I could just jump off but I’m working with a therapist now and I feel I need some armor to address my trauma. He prescribed me 20mcg butrans patches and 2mg buprenorphine tablets. I wanna taper eventually but he needs be to drop my dose by 2.5-5mg oxy weekly I’ve been trying for a month but can’t get down. I’ve gotten down to 11.5 one day but went right back up. He won’t keep me at 15 but he’ll prescribe me bupe. We know how this is so he said I only need to wait 8-12 hrs before trying Buprenorphine. Any advice? I’m also on lexapro as of 2 months ago, Prazosin, lunesta, gabapentin for the withdrawals, diazepam as needed. I just don’t think I can kick the opiates right now but I’m so ashamed to say I’m just not ready. Damn. Peace and love.
 
Do I suck it up and go on buprenorphine again or thug out this oxy taper …
 
Imop tapering is the only way I could make it off opiates. . You're on such a small amount , it seems like it should be doable to just chip off .5 a week without much trouble.
Id sure rather do that then be on subs .
 
No shame whatsoever in being honest with yourself about not being ready. Especially since as you say it is helping you in your present situation.

We're just human; sometimes life gets a bit much to take and we all need a little crutch at times. You will be ready eventually.
 
Just as TheUltimateFixx said, there is no reason to feel ashamed. Many of us (on bluelight or not) are in the same, or a very similar situation to yours.

We are all humans, and we sometimes make decisions we later regret. Please do not dwell on this; your future is whatever you decide to make of it, and that is a wonderful thing!

If there is one thing I've learned that I wish I would have known sooner is that attitude/mentality is about 98% of everything.

I've found this to be true for myself, and many others have agreed with me; just something to keep in mind.


I wish you nothing but the best of luck, whatever you decide to do.
 
You have a low dose. You are lucky. Unfortunately opioids are unforgiving. A little withdrawl is never little it's always uncomfortable. But you did not develop a high dependancy. Convince your doc that your struggle is real and make him understand you. Trust me you can handle it and make it off this. I have been titrating off Hydromorphone for half a year now. Been on opioids for 10 years almost for PHN (diagnosed for life) due to bad shingles and didn't know I had it. I did all the wrong things to treat it. I didn't know what was wrong with me till I was covered with blisters. After high dose of fentanyl I got hyperalgesia. No where to go but down 👇.

Slow is the key, allowed to take breaks. I have to use Hydromorphone, it's the only one that touches my pain. Was taking close to 100mg a day in contins and Dilaudid for breakthrough. Now just Hydromorph Contin at 66mg. Not a walk in the park. You're so lucky to be able to go down from it before it got to high levels
 
Imop tapering is the only way I could make it off opiates. . You're on such a small amount , it seems like it should be doable to just chip off .5 a week without much trouble.
Id sure rather do that then be on subs .
.5mg a week of oxy? Seems hard to calculate such a small amount!
No shame whatsoever in being honest with yourself about not being ready. Especially since as you say it is helping you in your present situation.

We're just human; sometimes life gets a bit much to take and we all need a little crutch at times. You will be ready eventually.
I’m speaking to him tomorrow. I wanna do the patches because having to take gabapentin and hydroxazine and clonidine all day is exhausting…
Just as TheUltimateFixx said, there is no reason to feel ashamed. Many of us (on bluelight or not) are in the same, or a very similar situation to yours.

We are all humans, and we sometimes make decisions we later regret. Please do not dwell on this; your future is whatever you decide to make of it, and that is a wonderful thing!

If there is one thing I've learned that I wish I would have known sooner is that attitude/mentality is about 98% of everything.

I've found this to be true for myself, and many others have agreed with me; just something to keep in mind.


I wish you nothing but the best of luck, whatever you decide to do.
I’m so damn tired. I know it’s a small dose but man I’m paying the piper for the 1000th time and it gets harder each time but I also get wiser I appreciate the support and thank you for that confidence boost!
You have a low dose. You are lucky. Unfortunately opioids are unforgiving. A little withdrawl is never little it's always uncomfortable. But you did not develop a high dependancy. Convince your doc that your struggle is real and make him understand you. Trust me you can handle it and make it off this. I have been titrating off Hydromorphone for half a year now. Been on opioids for 10 years almost for PHN (diagnosed for life) due to bad shingles and didn't know I had it. I did all the wrong things to treat it. I didn't know what was wrong with me till I was covered with blisters. After high dose of fentanyl I got hyperalgesia. No where to go but down 👇.

Slow is the key, allowed to take breaks. I have to use Hydromorphone, it's the only one that touches my pain. Was taking close to 100mg a day in contins and Dilaudid for breakthrough. Now just Hydromorph Contin at 66mg. Not a walk in the park. You're so lucky to be able to go down from it before it got to high levels
yea I feel you! Good job on getting down as well! A challenge is a challenge and each of us are different. I’m just frustrated now cause my doctor said just cut the 20mcg butrans patch and you’ll be good just wait 8 hours and I feel like there’s two things wrong with that after cross checking with others in the medical field. 1. I need more time between a full agonist and a partial, and 2. Cutting the patch can make it all release at once (according to my many sources) which is very unprofessional to tell me to do alone at home.
 
I'm not familiar with the butrans. I don't think any patch should be cut. I can't beleive your doc would say that!

The matrix style is a thin clear sticky piece of plastic. That's how the fentanyl patches are now actually I don't think they dump all at once. I cut mine once or twice. The drug is in the adhesive so it can't really dump but do not take that as fact. I am not positive about that. I just find it strange for a doc to say you should cut your patch regardless.

Low tolerance and buprenorphine can be very deadly. I self inducted myself on buprenorphine this weekend to see where my tolerance was with it. It helped me to see how my pain is. Not doing that again. I made sure to not get precipitated withdrawal and got very sick to do it. I'm saying this cause if you want to stop the buprenorphine and go back on it, well it sucks so much to get the pure agonist out of oneself.

Breaking up a tablet into small pieces is not reliable unless you dissolved into water and titrate the larger amount of water. That might work. But get more info and remember this is what works for me. Others may find better ways or find errors in my ways.
 
I only have 3 morphine tablets left that say ABG or ABC on one side a dark blue color and 15 on the other side. Will these hold me over for the next day? My doctor I is a ***** sorry I’m upset right now why can’t we just be nice to people
 
15mg I presume. For harm reduction check equivalency tables and reduce. Low tolerance if I can remember for me I was sensitive. Take less than recommend. You can take more later. But you can't undoe what's already in you. It should help yes. Just go small at first. Morphine oral works for pain. Lasts quite long too

Edit. I was half asleep when I wrote that. Those are 15mg.They are extended release so that's a low dose

Oxy and morphine are equal in potency for pain relief in me. Online calculation says 15mg of oxy is like 22.5mg of morphine. I swear they changed the equivalency from last time I checked. Seems right to me now. lt Could be stronger or weaker in you though that's why it's best to take a little less. But 15mg over 12 hours will not do much. Taking one should be just fine you might need 2 or even 3 at once. I figure you already took some of them by now
 
Last edited:
Top