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  • BDD Moderators: Keif’ Richards

I OD’d this morning

Joined
Dec 8, 2019
Messages
1,192
I’ve been buying my bags from the same plug for 2-3 yrs,every morning I get 4 bags in the city I live in right across from Manhattan and shoot two at a time and this morning after doing the 4 bags luckily I woke up and new I was in trouble,I first tried to find the two new narcan but I couldn’t find them because I kept falling over while looking for them,I then remembered I had a old one on top of the tv which I luckily found and used but after a couple minutes of looking for the new ones I decided to go out to the street and cann 911 before I fell out again,,I called 911 while laying on the sidewalk in front of my building, ( I didn’t want ems or the policeman in my apartment,,,I) I would have been cuffed to the gurney if they discovered me in my place,,,Well the met after 6 tries to get a IV started just gave up,,in the hospital after about 4-5 other folks tried getting a IV started they gave up and went into my pulse in my wrist to be able to get a blood sample,,they gave me a couple of IM narcan injections,one encounter to the hospital and another after the blood work,,,,
I felt terrible about this but when the Ambulance gurney put me next to the hospital gurney and the ambulance driver trapped my left leg and pulled I had explosive diarrhea in my underwear and for the next 1 1/2-2 hours,,,they cleaned me up twice but everytime they rolled me over more just kept coming out my butthole,,,,it was the foulest thing I ever experienced,,,,,,
I’m going to go back Monday and give them both a $100 inside a thank you card,,I just felt like they went above and beyond to treat me with dignity and respect…👍👍 The ambulance driver deserves his jaw broken for his comments but I’m not a petty person…

Ok I have a question,since I have had three doses of Narcan in me today,am I still addicted to the opiates I was doing,,,will I need to drink methadone tomorrow morning?

3 of his regular customers ended up in the ER this morning,,I’m guessing in the next couple days folks may be found,,he has a lot of clients and I’m sure a few will be found over the next couple days
 
Horrible, scary experience. I'm glad you are still here.

I just felt like they went above and beyond to treat me with dignity and respect…👍👍 The ambulance driver deserves his jaw broken for his comments but I’m not a petty person…

When you're in a super vulnerable position like you were, every interaction you have with others affects you so much more deeply than normal. Any judgement or hostility cuts extra deep. On the plus side, sounds like you got some brilliant paramedics/nurses who really treated you as an actual person during those moments of fear and embarassment. Those are some of the best people we have in society and they almost certainly don't get proportionate recognition, so I think your thank you card idea is perfect.


Do you think the OD was caused by doubling your usual amount? Have you done four bags before like that? Why'd you do it like that today? Or do you think the plug's gear has jumped in potency? If a bunch of other users are dropping, it would be worth reaching out to any of that dealer's other regular buyers to give them a head's up (if you know their contact details).


Ok I have a question,since I have had three doses of Narcan in me today,am I still addicted to the opiates I was doing,,,will I need to drink methadone tomorrow morning?

Yeah man you're still addicted. I would assume you're feeling pretty awful right now if you haven't used since you got the Narcan.
 
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You’re still addicted but you’ve had a lot of the opiates on your receptors knocked off.

Now you’re probably going to experience strong compulsion to refill those receptors and right now you don’t have access to safe dope.

So you could just run with it and check into rehab (everyone you love will view you as an addict), or you could try to keep it quiet and just stay a junky, or you could keep it quiet and start doing smart recovery, shit you could even go to rehab quiet.

Everything’s available to you right now.

The world is your oyster

You could change everything.
 
Keep the hospital staff honest and don't go back. Don't need them screening people who may give tips. They probably want to forget it just as much as you do. You got lucky man you may not get a second chance. This could be the best thing that ever happened to you. Get on methadone and aim to get stable on low doses as fast as tolerable to minimize dangers of QT prolongation. Ain't no fire treez where you are?
 
Horrible, scary experience. I'm glad you are still here.
🙏🙏


When you're in a super vulnerable position like you were, every interaction you have with others affects you so much more deeply than normal. Any judgement or hostility cuts extra deep. On the plus side, sounds like you got some brilliant paramedics/nurses who really treated you as an actual person during those moments of fear and embarassment. Those are some of the best people we have in society and they almost certainly don't get proportionate recognition, so I think your thank you card idea is perfect.
Emts and the hospital staff were great it’s that the driver mouthed of twice about me having more dope on me and I’ll probably get high in the hospital,,and because I had $60 in my pocket I must have robbed something,,,,just uncalled for comments,,,to be fair I did give him the finger a few minutes earlier when he asked if it was $5 or $10 bags,and the dealers name

Do you think the OD was caused by doubling your usual amount? Have you done four bags before like that? Why'd you do it like that today? Or do you think the plug's gear has jumped in potency? If a bunch of other users are dropping, it would be worth reaching out to any of that dealer's other regular buyers to give them a head's up (if you know their contact details).

I always have done 4 every morning,2 bags at a time,two shots about 10 minutes apart,,And yes I called my plug and told him and he said that was a fresh batch he got last night,,normally he’d give me a heads up about that,,a friend went to the plugs house this morning so I didn’t see him,,The friend told me he only shot 1/4 of a bag and went to sleep for three hrs ..I do remember the 2nd shot I did one of the bags had red ink,the other three were blue stamp which was normal..


Yeah man you're still addicted. I would assume you're feeling pretty awful right now if you haven't used since you got the Narcan. I have 4 80 mg methadone in the frig,I took a cap full and it held me all night,I took another capful this morning,,I’m going to try a couple tramadols tonight if I have a hard time sleeping..
 
Keep the hospital staff honest and don't go back. Don't need them screening people who may give tips. They probably want to forget it just as much as you do. You got lucky man you may not get a second chance. This could be the best thing that ever happened to you. Get on methadone and aim to get stable on low doses as fast as tolerable to minimize dangers of QT prolongation. Ain't no fire treez where you are?
Yeah it’s recreational here,,I have some methadone in the frig👍👍
 
Consider using one of the assisted use lines.. so when you are administering your dose you stay on the phone with a volunteer and then if you become unresponsive they call EMS for you.

It provides a great deal of protection and support in case of an OD crisis.
Wow,this is brilliant dude,I never heard of these,,I know NY and on the West Coast they have Save use locations just in case things go south
 
You’re still addicted but you’ve had a lot of the opiates on your receptors knocked off.
Gotcha
Now you’re probably going to experience strong compulsion to refill those receptors and right now you don’t have access to safe dope.

I actually feel a little better this morning
So you could just run with it and check into rehab (everyone you love will view you as an addict), or you could try to keep it quiet and just stay a junky, or you could keep it quiet and start doing smart recovery, shit you could even go to rehab quiet.
I’m 60,I went to my first detox,rehab at 22,I started shooting H at 16,,everyone I know knows my history,,i was clean from 44-54 thanks to a 90 day sentence on the drug tier in the jail…
Everything’s available to you right now.

The world is your oyster
I like that👍👍👍
You could change everything.
 
When you're in a super vulnerable position like you were, every interaction you have with others affects you so much more deeply than normal. Any judgement or hostility cuts extra deep. On the plus side, sounds like you got some brilliant paramedics/nurses who really treated you as an actual person during those moments of fear and embarassment. Those are some of the best people we have in society and they almost certainly don't get proportionate recognition, so I think your thank you card idea is perfect.
Nice words

’m going to go back Monday and give them both a $100 inside a thank you card,,I just felt like they went above and beyond to treat me with dignity and respect
You would make their day, maybe even their month. They deal with that situation all day everyday and worse most days. They are special souls to do that work. When they clock-out at work and go home to see their families, they are still on the clock in some way or another. PTSD is as real as real can get. Many of our brave selfless EMS (light workers, watchers, soul savers, strongest of the strongest) they need counselors and people to talk to. Talk about living a double-life, raising a family, wife, kids, and that same night not being able to save a 7 year old girl and then the same night tucking in for bed their 7 year old daughter & keep it all together mentally, physical language, and being able to find the right words for their kids that night & each night after.

The EMS worker who is single, no kids, small family, my heart goes out to them as well. Many of them once they clock-out at work many times to live in over-time replaying each night's events. Day end and day out. Many citizens call these men & women brave, strong, and many of us have not actual clue how brave and strong they are 24/7. Back to the alone EMS employee, I hope each one finds hope in talking to a counselor. Not just short-term treatment, I hope they have something set up long-term.

I recently heard a profound statement the a police or EMS after a 20-30 years work history has seen as much trauma, pain, etc. as 4 years of active war tours. OF course this statement has it's place and time but I get the point of it.

You should bring those caring men $100 and a nice heart-felt note on a card from Walgreens. It is you that thinks on this level that is a level above many other "human beings." I really hope you have gotten all the pain you need in order to change. There are people out there that care about you, most importantly finding that person in the mirror that cares about you is most important to getting a grip.

This is a song lyric chorus I wanted to share about dope :

Mad Season : River of Deceit


Artist : Mad Season // Song Title & Lyrics : River of Deceit // Artist responsible for this : Lane Staley
My pain is self-chosen
At least, so the prophet says
I could either burn
Or cut off my pride and buy some time
A head full of lies is the weight, tied to my waist
The river of deceit pulls down, oh oh
The only direction we flow is down
Down, oh down
Down, oh down
Down, oh down
Down, oh down
My pain is self-chosen
At least I believe it to be
I could either drown
Or pull off my skin and swim to shore
Now I can grow a beautiful shell for all to see
The River of Deceit pulls down, yeah
The only direction we flow is down
Down, oh down
Down, oh down
Down, oh down
Down, oh down
The pain is self-chosen, yeah
Our pain is self-chosen
Down, oh down
Down, oh down
Down, oh down
Down, oh down

Lane Staley from Alice In Chains, Mad Season was a full-blown heroin addict & crack addict. Daily he paid friends to get him 3 grams of high quality heroin and 3 grams of crack. I am sure he got them well and high. A rich junkies is the hardest to get clean and few make it out alive.
 
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A genius song writer once wrote words at the end of a song "I've seen the damage and the needle done ,a little part of it in everyone but every junkies like a setting sun"
I would save your money they get paid well enough and regardless of any person's situation they should always be treated with dignity .they would have done the same for a senator or politician and there should be no discrimination in health care based on someone's circumstances. I hope your feeling better 💓
 
I also have a question which I really shouldn't be asking because I've never tried stronger opiates than codiene lol.so forgive me .if I was to take methadone would it be like taking heroin, what is the difference. I don't plan to take either I just don't understand the difference..sorry its off topic I'm just trying to learn .
 
I also have a question which I really shouldn't be asking because I've never tried stronger opiates than codiene lol.so forgive me .if I was to take methadone would it be like taking heroin, what is the difference. I don't plan to take either I just don't understand the difference..sorry its off topic I'm just trying to learn .
Methadone could be too strong for you depending on the dose, and not strong in a good way, like too strong for your body to breathe on its own, or wakeup if you're choking on your vomit. It's not made to get high on. It's made to coat the receptors for a long time to keep people from getting sick, or to keep people out of pain for long periods of time. If you've messed with codeine you may be sensitive I would be really careful with any other opiates. Can't smoke right now but nothing is better than weed. Strains for pain, strains for motivation, strains for everything. I like mixing strains, the combinations are endless. Even the same strain from different manufacturers are slightly different.

Messing with dope will only lead to death. Have you ever even tested it for fent? Because it's going to be in there at some point if it's not already.
 
Methadone could be too strong for you depending on the dose, and not strong in a good way, like too strong for your body to breathe on its own, or wakeup if you're choking on your vomit. It's not made to get high on. It's made to coat the receptors for a long time to keep people from getting sick, or to keep people out of pain for long periods of time. If you've messed with codeine you may be sensitive I would be really careful with any other opiates. Can't smoke right now but nothing is better than weed. Strains for pain, strains for motivation, strains for everything. I like mixing strains, the combinations are endless. Even the same strain from different manufacturers are slightly different.

Messing with dope will only lead to death. Have you ever even tested it for fent? Because it's going to be in there at some point if it's not already.
That's weird I thought that it would just be like heroin but not as strong .I'm lucky I've never had anything laced with fent but I don't think I'd mind if I new it was in there with something I had in the medicine cabinet and I kept an eye on it .I'm desperate to find out about the experience I would get with h .dreams ,relaxation and not a care in the world
 
A genius song writer once wrote words at the end of a song "I've seen the damage and the needle done ,a little part of it in everyone but every junkies like a setting sun"
I would save your money they get paid well enough and regardless of any person's situation they should always be treated with dignity .they would have done the same for a senator or politician and there should be no discrimination in health care based on someone's circumstances. I hope your feeling better 💓
Neil Young wrote that line. My parents played Neil Young and CSNY growing up. This song line you mentioned is awesome. Yet is written from an outsiders point of view.


This is written from someone struggling to stay clean, a inner battle, knowing that once the dope stops the brain has to be dealt with and all the falsehoods imprinted in the mind :
"I could either burn
Or cut off my pride and buy some time
A head full of lies is the weight, tied to my waist"
-- Lane Stanley
 
A genius song writer once wrote words at the end of a song "I've seen the damage and the needle done ,a little part of it in everyone but every junkies like a setting sun"
I would save your money they get paid well enough and regardless of any person's situation they should always be treated with dignity .they would have done the same for a senator or politician and there should be no discrimination in health care based on someone's circumstances. I hope your feeling better 💓
I’ve seen Neil a bunch of times and I might be wrong but it’s played at every show I think I’ve been too ,Great tune that brings tears…. Written for a couple of his roadies….😢

 
I’ve seen Neil a bunch of times and I might be wrong but it’s played at every show I think I’ve been too ,Great tune that brings tears…. Written for a couple of his roadies….😢

I guess your in North America somewhere .your so lucky to see great musicians ,there a little harder to come by beside me but I'm in the queue for radio head tickets. Fingers 🤞
 


"Junk, fuck"
Yeah
Yeah
A good night, the best in a long time
A new friend turned me on to an old favorite
Nothing better than a dealer who's high
Be high, convince them to buy, yeah
What's my drug of choice?
Well, what have you got?
I don't go broke
And I do it a lot
Seem so sick to the hypocrite norm
Running their boring drills
But we are an elite race of our own
The stoners, junkies and freaks
Are you happy? I am, man
Content and fully aware
Money, status, nothing to me
'Cause your life is empty and bare, yeah
What's my drug of choice?
Well, what have you got?
I don't go broke
And I do it a lot
I do it a lot, yeah
Yeah
Yeah
Yeah
You can't understand a user's mind
But try with your books and degrees
If you let yourself go and opened your mind
I'll bet you'd be doing like me
And it ain't so bad
What's my drug of choice?
Well, what have you got?
Say I don't go broke
And I do it a lot (say I do it a lot)
I do it a lot
I do it a lot
Said, I do it a lot
 
Neil Young wrote that line. My parents played Neil Young and CSNY growing up. This song line you mentioned is awesome. Yet is written from an outsiders point of view.


This is written from someone struggling to stay clean, a inner battle, knowing that once the dope stops the brain has to be dealt with and all the falsehoods imprinted in the mind :
"I could either burn
Or cut off my pride and buy some time
A head full of lies is the weight, tied to my waist"
-- Lane Stanley
yeh my son can play it on the acoustic i never get tired of listening to it ,i think it describes addiction perfectly .i once sang the lyrics while he was playing and my wife took a video it sounded like a cat going under a 12 wheel truck lol
 
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