Yeah, I'd buy a house in the countryside with amenities within cycling distance. I'd put the rest into a savings account and pay myself food/bill money out of it for the remainder of my life. If I was using I'd buy private well-rated rehab and make a life or death sort of commitment to it. From there I'd face my depression and fears in my new abode alone amidst the country foliage and air. I'd keep no friends or close ones and simply play video games, listen to music, watch TV/movies and enjoy the countryside. Maybe buy a gaming PC every 10 years or so or just replace the outdated parts and I'd make sure I had a few back up bicycles for when I didn't have time/want to repair them or replace the inner tubes/tyres.