Ethical porn. Seriously, start googling "ethical porn sites" and find one you can just about get off to. Unfortunately they're mostly all requiring registration, age verification, possibly payment... the ones I found also definitely lacked the "brutal gangbang orgy party in the last days of Sodom & Gomorrah before God nuked 'em from space" kinda vibe that the mainstream unethical and free sites blast at your eyeballs throughout... Actually I didn't even manage to watch anything, or did I? Yeah maybe I watched a few minutes of a fairly vanilla scene of a fairly attractive normal looking woman lying on a bed like what happens in sex in real life 90%+ of the time - definitely a toning down of the moans and writhing and such that mainstream porn has normalized... that might have been free, I did stop watching after a few minutes, I experimentally tested the age verification on one site using a driving license generated straight from ChatGPT and it passed at first but something bugged out so I moved on. I think Canada might be a good country to VPN into for such websites, I guess the ones taking internet safety laws more seriously in the countries in which they operate.
I will say, I'm not a saint, it's just not that good if you've lived your adult life exposed to the overall grim awfulness of the modern porn industry... I won't say I'll never log on to one of the fucking grim big players ever again... somehow I'll justify it to myself although I, fuck, I wish I had any willpower whatsoever to say shit like that, like, never again... But ethical porn is an option to protect your mind from the corrosion of even passively participating in people being dehumanized, thus lessening what it means to be human. Not that every video on every one of the exploitative scum-controlled biggest sites is secretly showing some dark shit, hidden behind the scenes... but a fuck ton more than most understand or want to believe, is... or so I hear. I mean I'm not an expert, maybe I'm totally wrong. But if I'm not, that'd be fine compared to being right, whether I watch any of it or not.
I mean surely I'm not alone in thinking that porn sites have become, broadly, just pretty fucking grim, sickening, like... sometimes I'll log on to one and click through a couple videos then just instantly get some horrible feeling of revulsion and have to give up. Imagination isn't as good either but, I just dunno how to reconcile the enjoyable nature of juuuust the right amount of edge in mainstream porn being displayed alongside videos of some fucked up blowbang with rosebud closeups, like what does that say about even the shit that doesn't immediately disgust you a little?! Or the industry in general? Or... and this is a hard pill to swallow, for sure... those who enable this shit by participating, of which I am still, sometimes, one of them? Not good things.