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Positive The Tapering Support Thread v 2.0

ChemicallyEnhanced said:
I'm actually struggling A LOT more mentally than I thought I would. Like...even if I take enough to be physically completely symptom free (in terms of withdrawal)...the anhedonia is very real. Like, I just feel bored and don't enjoy anything anymore. I just see time stretching out in front of me going on and on and on and it HORRIFIES me that I just have to keep on trying to make that time pass, so I end up getting high to cope and then I love life again :/
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I find this same thing and end up vaping too much bud to cheer myself up, instead it slows me down and I feel like giving up in general. I think it helps not to put too much pressure on myself. If I need it one day then so be it, I make sure it's an isolated event, every time, until I realise it's no longer isolated from all the other isolated uses :oops: and I remember I'm terrible at this.
I don't have the answers, I'm just trying to make this time last, as some song says.
I've been stop start for a long time, I feel different this time, I'm not depressed like I was a couple of years ago, just a normal amount of depression that won't make me suicidal, so it's an easier time for me to try perhaps.
 
Guys I got myself into a bind here.

I started using benzos 2 months ago. Dosage has increased to approx 2mg etizolam/day then when that ran out I started using 1mg-2mg clonazepam.
This will soon run out.

I was trying to use heroin when the benzo withdrawal came up. It helps but didn't stop the overenergy and other anxiety-related symptoms.
Now I've been using heroin #3 smoked for 1-2 weeks daily. Im down to only 1mg of clonaz/day all spaced out - trying to conserve.

Anyway - I need help getting off both. Specific instructions on how to do it to avoid seizures is my main concern.
I haven't made it longer than 24h without benzos for 2 months.
Its a short run, I know but still the WD is there and real.
Advice. Help. How. Seizure -- avoid!
 
Madrus said:
Guys I got myself into a bind here.

I started using benzos 2 months ago. Dosage has increased to approx 2mg etizolam/day then when that ran out I started using 1mg-2mg clonazepam.
This will soon run out.

I was trying to use heroin when the benzo withdrawal came up. It helps but didn't stop the overenergy and other anxiety-related symptoms.
Now I've been using heroin #3 smoked for 1-2 weeks daily. Im down to only 1mg of clonaz/day all spaced out - trying to conserve.

Anyway - I need help getting off both. Specific instructions on how to do it to avoid seizures is my main concern.
I haven't made it longer than 24h without benzos for 2 months.
Its a short run, I know but still the WD is there and real.
Advice. Help. How. Seizure -- avoid!
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Hi man, weaning off the benzos sounds like the main concern, yeah I'd just taper off if you have any remanining, how long you been using the benzos for? There are some resources to get off it.
 
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ChemicallyEnhanced said:
Thanks :)

I'm actually struggling A LOT more mentally than I thought I would. Like...even if I take enough to be physically completely symptom free (in terms of withdrawal)...the anhedonia is very real. Like, I just feel bored and don't enjoy anything anymore. I just see time stretching out in front of me going on and on and on and it HORRIFIES me that I just have to keep on trying to make that time pass, so I end up getting high to cope and then I love life again :/
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Hi CE Hope you're doing alright these days I and others on this forum an a facebook group had anhedonia as well, nasty symptom. Srry to hear the struggle you are experiencing.
 
Jnowhere said:
Good job getting of benzos and opiods; seriously I asked my doctor and he said it could take up to a year and a half if I wanted off all that I am prescribed. I don't get hugh amounts, so getting off, of large amounts, great job.

Anti depressants I have heard can take weeks to start working and need a taper to stop using also, is this true?

Also anti psychotics, while they can really help people with various mental health disorders can cause people without these disorders to be zombies( figuratively speaking)?
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Yes it's true, weeks, and yes you need to taper off.
 
Squeaky said:
I had begun drinking 24/7 for only a few weeks and nearly destroyed mine. That ended a couple of months ago. I feel fine now
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Try doing it for 2 decades and that destroyed me, but now I smoke again and on 3 controlled substances. You are smart enough to know when to quit drinking in the morning, afternoon and until you passed out at night; made me pissed and messed up. Alcohol is deceptively evil if abused. Good job being able to recognize the danger and stop before the shakes, withdrawals and the dt's over took you.
When I say smoke, I mean cancer sticks.
 
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Jnowhere said:
Try doing it for 2 decades and that destroyed me, but now I smoke again and on 3 controlled substances. You are smart enough to know when to quit drinking in the morning, afternoon and until you passed out at night; made me pissed and messed up. Alcohol is deceptively evil if abused. Good job being able to recognize the danger and stop before the shakes, withdrawals and the dt's over took you.
When I say smoke, I mean cancer sticks.
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I had been a functioning alcoholic for 25 years. Getting blind drunk every night. Hungover every morning. Puking into a large soda cup whilst driving on the freeway at work.

It was only recently that I began drinking in the morning though.
 
Madrus said:
Guys I got myself into a bind here.

I started using benzos 2 months ago. Dosage has increased to approx 2mg etizolam/day then when that ran out I started using 1mg-2mg clonazepam.
This will soon run out.

I was trying to use heroin when the benzo withdrawal came up. It helps but didn't stop the overenergy and other anxiety-related symptoms.
Now I've been using heroin #3 smoked for 1-2 weeks daily. Im down to only 1mg of clonaz/day all spaced out - trying to conserve.

Anyway - I need help getting off both. Specific instructions on how to do it to avoid seizures is my main concern.
I haven't made it longer than 24h without benzos for 2 months.
Its a short run, I know but still the WD is there and real.
Advice. Help. How. Seizure -- avoid!
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Seizures can be avoided with relatively small amounts of benzos. But you’re going to be absolutely miserable.

Any chance you could get medical help?
 
Squeaky said:
I had been a functioning alcoholic for 25 years. Getting blind drunk every night. Hungover every morning. Puking into a large soda cup whilst driving on the freeway at work.

It was only recently that I began drinking in the morning though.
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That, I didn't know at the time will cause problems real fast.
 
kiely said:
So I made it through the taper and got this far. I still feel the same but . . .

I am not living out of a bottle of pills all day long and at times I was counting the hours on the clock too.

It was a horrible battle that beat me down. I feel strength now and I know that I have to keep going

everyday. I really have and had no choice. Maybe someday sometime in the future opioid with be a thing

again. I really hope so. But it sure isn't going to affect me as far as having to take another one continuously.

~~~~~~


I just want to get better. Wanted to very badly and I guess I made an effort.




But I am so tapered from any kind of substance that I actually got high as could be from an energy drink today.

Yes, extremely. And I am actually getting even higher from drinking a coke now even though it is only 12 ounces. Actually,

I only did eight ouncz and that's it. Oh yeah . . . . Can you imagine getting high from (reg) a coke a cola. Well it was boosting

the energy drink and I actually had to use mm vapes and or a smoke to stay stable. WoW.




Now I don't have to be a dependent on anything pills or anything that is Norco or Benzo. And I so appreciated all of the phenomenal help too.

What a gift of encouragement and knowledge. Good support and friendship too. wow

When I finally DO ?! taper from these caffeine and energy drinks I will finally be able to just drink only water and I will be

able to enjoy doing so again. I have to. I want to. And hopefully I will. Or I should say it just has to be done. . . . right.!#



However what I am worried about now is if the withdrawing and tapering from my fav d.o.c. and other comfort meds

too are a cause of my headache problems. Even though it is probably a 0%, I really strongly feel right now

that it is a good possibility that it was a trigger. My system seemed to be beat down too bad though to overcome or even compensate for it at this point.

I hope it goes away. My doctor said it only gets worse and not better. But it did get better. A compromise of the immune system.

Like having diabetes because that is debilitating too. But it better not get worse because Norco will help and I am just not taking any.

Maybe it was inflammation from the asprin in it all of those years. I am glad I learned to CWE. There was so much aspirin mixed in \\ it amazed me. So

Norco was

Too good to be true .. so it probably is. I think the aspirin did some damage though. Fckssss !!!!!!!!!!



It's not even sad anymore but . . . just a bit kind of terrifying. And the worst part of it all is the lack of energy, lethargy.

And that I have very very little motivation to accomplish much. I still want to try however. Maybe. But I am convincing myself to.

I just don't know sometimes. And most of the time I just don't want to. If that makes sense. But it's for real. Sigh.

Today I had another pretty good day today. Maybe I am being overconfident. But I hope that it stays this way. Omg.

Maybe I'm just dumb. Probably.


But wow I am working a lot better than I have been in a long while. Getting up and moving around.

I can still keep up a real good pace when I am walking. I walk better than I ever have before in my life.

Probably from walking and riding a lot in the past so I am able to for maybe that reason.

But I even had to quit trying to figure out how to learn to

use a camera and reading Spanish because it actually hurts my brain too much. Now I am really slow and I hurt.



Why is it even worth it anymore . . . . . but I am actually finding ways. I find things outdoors to do. Local. Spending the day

at the Lake ect ect and the Rivers is great fun too. It's bad out there though and I almost died from the sun a few times.

Life is always great . . . until you get burnt. Well and here I am still alive. I don't want to get too confident. But it has hurt

pretty bad. It was my malfunction immunity breaking me down bad. And then quitting Norco all at once. I had to quit three or four times. And had plenty of Norco for back up. Had.


Oh I better go. It is easy to write a lot when you need to vent about having to be forced to taper. ha ha. Bye.

It sure ain't easy. No, Not At All. thnx It's real and I would never have believed it until I really had to quit.

And the necessity of the taper is Real and is there. It hurts .. . . that's why I am venting so. bye agian.


the drugs are so dangerous now . . . i would rather die slow than to get burnt again.
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Hows it going?
Hope this finds you well😎
 
Iceman1216 said:
Hows it going?
Hope this finds you well😎
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HI !! That is so nice of you. The weather is too hot right now to feel anything. I guess.

But anyway that felt so Nice !!! Thank you for your post and everything. And that was so nice to hear right now.

I guess that kind of thing works after all. <3

🥰

But yeah it's so hot I just feel like I am in a whole body cast. And in traction. But in a good way. Less pain that way.


But yes I have made it through a lot. And I would say the worst is over now. Dealing of the hurt from pulling away from

pain pills and the habit of them in everyday life. It is a strong rip tide and a strong pull to finally be free from and also out of

and back on the way to getting better. To finding that much better way to feel the success and real feelings of being so much much better.

Perseverance too. Keeps helping.

Try to keep going and find as much of that relief as possible. You are worth it all and deserve the best and to feel what is that better.

And always.

Oh and thank you thank you again for writing. That was Amazing !! :)

~~~~

But yes, it's like good to hear from you too !!! You have strong comments. 🌷🌟🪻:)

Heck Yeah !!!!
 
ChemicallyEnhanced said:
Thanks to a completely involuntary 9-day abstinence 3 weeks ago, I'm mostly over the PHYSICAL dependency on opioids, to where I can (physically) get by on (8 x 30mg) 240mg of Codeine/day.

At what rate should I attempt to taper down?
I was thinking start with 7 (210mg) pills, but how long should I wait before reducing to 6 (180mg) pills a day? I have no idea. 3 days? A week? Two weeks?
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Ran out and I'm in full-blown withdrawal. That did NOT last long :(

It took me like 3+ months to get dependant in the first place (3+ months of using 6 times a day)...have how I gotten re-dependant again in just 4 weeks and with only using once a day a lot of the time?
 
AlphaMethylPhenyl said:
Done with my taper but willing to offer my opinions on anything. Once dependent on benzos and opioids at high doses. No longer. Approaching three years for the former, and nearly a year for the latter! Shit can still be hard. I just power through and know that it gets easier with time and healthy uses of my energy. Just one more adversary to conquer!

I feel you, but I will say that I've seen antipsychotics completely transform lives and make them much better. Takes a while of being on them for them to fully work. Like several months at least. Not to derail.
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The problem is that what do they do to a person who doesn't suffer from a known and very real mental illness; it will turn them in Zombie.
 
Squeaky said:
I think that’s the secret to not destroying your liver. It gets a break every morning. I drank like that for years (more actually) and never had any problems. Blood tests were always perfect.

Detox ever morning. Start over at night.
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I knew it, that's what fucked be over, morning drinking, along with after noon and once in a while evening drinking in
Squeaky said:
For me it’s the constant memory of happiness that drove me back to the drugs. My body not hurting. Not being tired. Etc. I usually didn’t even want to get ‘high’. But it was 24/7 for months, that longing for today to not suck.

Knowing that it was just a few feet away, and that nobody would ever know I had taken my pills made it harder too. It was incredibly difficult to resist. When life sucks that much, and it’s that easy to fix it, the conversation with myself just ran non-stop inside my head.
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You mean that little devil on your shoulder saying, just one last time. Know that feeling well
 
Jnowhere said:
Sorry, just wondering because benzos are the best for alcohol withdrawal; That and IV Dilaudid. Didn't know if reverse were true.
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Oh you're fine, just wanted to make sure things are in the spirit of harm reduction! Alcohol doesn't last long enough, and it has effects on some other NT's that make it non-medicinal. Only if it's a real life or death scenario. Otherwise, they usually give people long-acting benzos to make sure that one doesn't seize, and then taper one off of it. Much safer that way.

Not sure what you meant about Dilaudid though. I think that doesn't last very long at all also. Very euphorac but not long-lasting.
 
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