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How careful do I need to be with mixing diazepam and alcohol.

benladdie3000 said:
IV already spent weeks in a psych ward after slashing myself up. Not nice at all. My reasoning for the diazepam, sleepers and alcohol method was due to users on Reddit claiming it was a peaceful way to go. And pretty full proof if enough taken. Tbf I don't think I'm clinically depressed, I'd say I'm more defeated and traumatised, scared of my lack of future. I just want to go out as I am now rather than waste away into nothing and brokeness
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how would anyone know what's a peaceful way to go? also how would one down 500mg of diazepam with 1l of booze and keep it down? imagine waking up with half lung full with vomit, doesn't sound nice at all.
there are much better ways to die. since you decided to die maybe after all it's better to die defending something good or fighting for something good than to waste bones & meat for nothing.
 
benladdie3000 said:
IV already spent weeks in a psych ward after slashing myself up. Not nice at all. My reasoning for the diazepam, sleepers and alcohol method was due to users on Reddit claiming it was a peaceful way to go. And pretty full proof if enough taken. Tbf I don't think I'm clinically depressed, I'd say I'm more defeated and traumatised, scared of my lack of future. I just want to go out as I am now rather than waste away into nothing and brokeness
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Have you tried ketamine or psychedelics? They might help. And fuck the psych ward those places are hell
 
Well I tried it, I drank a litre of vodka in an hour or so, then took 100x5mg diazepam pills and 10x7.5ng zopiclones. Iv just woken up and I feel like a zombie even struggling to type. Guess it didn't work at all. I'll have to try something like insulin next time. FmL
 
benladdie3000 said:
Well I tried it, I drank a litre of vodka in an hour or so, then took 100x5mg diazepam pills and 10x7.5ng zopiclones. Iv just woken up and I feel like a zombie even struggling to type. Guess it didn't work at all. I'll have to try something like insulin next time. FmL
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Try ketamine or psychedelics. Nothing is worth killing yourself over
 
This is painful as hell. I should have listened to those who said it wasn't going to work because I built up the courage to do it all for my gf to just roll me onto my side and wait for me to wake up (which I was so angry about) I did not want to wake up. And now Vids I made for my children have been sent to them by my friends who I told I was going to commit suicide. Videos I made explaining I love them and couldn't face this life anymore. Now they've got a dad who is clearly suicidal but yet is still here, it'll probably be even longer until I see them now
 
benladdie3000 said:
This is painful as hell. I should have listened to those who said it wasn't going to work because I built up the courage to do it all for my gf to just roll me onto my side and wait for me to wake up (which I was so angry about) I did not want to wake up. And now Vids I made for my children have been sent to them by my friends who I told I was going to commit suicide. Videos I made explaining I love them and couldn't face this life anymore. Now they've got a dad who is clearly suicidal but yet is still here, it'll probably be even longer until I see them now
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Still plenty of time to get better and show that to your kids.
You have many tomorrows to live now.
 
benladdie3000 said:
This is painful as hell. I should have listened to those who said it wasn't going to work because I built up the courage to do it all for my gf to just roll me onto my side and wait for me to wake up (which I was so angry about) I did not want to wake up. And now Vids I made for my children have been sent to them by my friends who I told I was going to commit suicide. Videos I made explaining I love them and couldn't face this life anymore. Now they've got a dad who is clearly suicidal but yet is still here, it'll probably be even longer until I see them now
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your friends have sent the vids to your kids? Before you were even 'dead'? wft? So your friends knew you were actually doing the suiciding but didn't try to help you oin any way?

why would they do that? both actions (them sending the vids, them not helping you) just sounds insane to me unless I'm missing something

Perhaps it's not your time to go, pr perhap you feel like living a bit more you have suicided unsuccesfully - looks like it as you are asking about Ketamine

Why don't you give yourself say, a 6 month limit? Try the ketamine, try the two therapeutic interventions I have PM'd you first. If nothing helps then maybe reconsider, but only then, and by then you may feel differently anyway

6 months, for the possibility of yor life changingand oh, yeah, the chance not to give your kids a life sentence of pain.
 
benladdie3000 said:
This is painful as hell. I should have listened to those who said it wasn't going to work because I built up the courage to do it all for my gf to just roll me onto my side and wait for me to wake up (which I was so angry about) I did not want to wake up. And now Vids I made for my children have been sent to them by my friends who I told I was going to commit suicide. Videos I made explaining I love them and couldn't face this life anymore. Now they've got a dad who is clearly suicidal but yet is still here, it'll probably be even longer until I see them now
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Well ive had more pills and vodka then that for breakfast so im not surprised it didt work. Seriously thought you have alot to live for try ketamine or psycheelic therapy
 
Got released from hospital yesterday, I regret doing it but my biggest regret is it not working. I don't want to be here, I was so disappointed waking up.
 
benladdie3000 said:
Got released from hospital yesterday, I regret doing it but my biggest regret is it not working. I don't want to be here, I was so disappointed waking up.
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No disrespect mate but you have kids who are alive and well. You have a family. A roof over your head and aren't terminally ill. My advice would be seek things to find gratitude in. And seek to improve yourself day by day. Perhaps a 30minute walk outside per day. Some light dumbell exercises. Maybe do some cooking. Try and improve your health/fitness, and surely your mental health will follow.

These are also the best steps to work your way back towards being a part of the kids life. Wallowing in it or trying to overdose yourself with benzos your just playing right into your ex partners hands.
 
He's right @benladdie3000

If you can't find peace and a reason to live for yourself can you not at least do it for your children? Put your own feelings and troubles aside and try to move on for their sakes.

At best it's a very sad loss of your life. At worst it's a very selfish and damaging experience to put your children and friends through and will affect them for a long (possibly life long) time. Could you not at least try for their sakes?

These times and feelings WILL pass.

I genuinely hope you find the strength and peace you need.

BB
 
Dangerous combo just volatile the risk ledge is way too steep but I have done a ton might not should have survived all of them a cousin died in his sleep after a night of partying drinking on downers other one fent OD

That being said I got some free fentanyl test kits I see the county here cracking down on harm reduction NARCAN even out in the boondocks all facilities have it also xylazine testing I still don't know wtf that is

Ordering pills from a trusted darknet associate? Ya I should trust the reviews no need to test but in such unregulated territory mistakes happen and might get swept into the next shipment

I usually tried to keep it to a couple beers (in this case liquor makes you sicker much quicker also amnesia kicks in after not too much of each had to experience blackouts to learn the line they would kick in) couple mg and vomiting usually wouldn't let it escalate but the ledge I slid down out of control lose sense of amounts
 
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broncoseamonkey said:
Ordering pills from a trusted darknet associate? Ya I should trust the reviews no need to test* but in such unregulated territory mistakes happen and might get swept into the next shipment
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*definitely do test. if not with reagents or in lab than at least start with a fraction of a dose you would normally take and increase slowly
with pills consider they ain't dosed consistently so don't jump into taking many at once soon.
 
Generic brand benzo only works with alcohol, for me...

If I want to black out and sleep the whole night for example, after doing blow, 1mg alprazolam on it's own, if it's generic, doesn't do anything... If I Take it with 1 or 2 shots of bourbon, I feel it kicking in and I feel the blackout on the horizon, I lay on bed and in 10min I am totally asleep.
 
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