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🌟🌟 Social 🌟🌟 What Was YOUR Morning Fix? v. I Smoke Weed, Eat Yogurt

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Just the usual, you know the routine - coffee, nicotine, thc, bupe. Heavy on the coffee this morning, like I just can't seem to get in gear, but that's because I fucked up and went with a weaker brand that was on sale instead of my usual supermegatweakercharged Death Wish.

Down to maybe half a g in my dab pen, which I'm trying to reserve for when I get a little closer to this job interview I got here at 1pm... calms the nerves, ya know? 😉

Hopefully it'll go well and I land job#2, because I can barely buy groceries with the hours I'm getting at job#1. Shitty thing is, what I got left is probably gonna be my last bit of herb for a good while as I'm on parole; I've been getting some leeway from my p.o.on testing hot for thc because she knows I have a medical issue I'm dealing with right now and that weed is the only thing that helps until we can figure out what's going on and how to address it. But she also made it clear that that window of compassion wouldn't extend on indefinitely. Wonderful system we have here. 🫤

Sooooo, probably back to no appetite and spontaneous vomiting tomorrow. 🤮
 
elgoucho9 said:
Caffeine and a heavy legs workout.

Drug free the past 7 days bar a couple of pipes of weed.
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Good man. 7 days is great if you were into opiates etc. and no-one really counts weed. If course it's a drug, but thank fuck these days people don't see it as a deadly hippy poison. Wish I could still enjoy it's effects the way I used to, but sadly whenever I have more than a couple of puffs I feel a bit edgy and uncomfortable. Mushrooms are definitely more my preferred "poison" these days.
 
axe battler said:
Good man. 7 days is great if you were into opiates etc. and no-one really counts weed. If course it's a drug, but thank fuck these days people don't see it as a deadly hippy poison. Wish I could still enjoy it's effects the way I used to, but sadly whenever I have more than a couple of puffs I feel a bit edgy and uncomfortable. Mushrooms are definitely more my preferred "poison" these days.
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I won't lie mate it's probably the most off the rails I've been. I've done much longer amounts of time smoking crack than the mere 3 weeks I was slipping there, but those 3 weeks was proper bad. IV'ing both B & W, nearly overdosed a couple of times, very little sleep did a 7 days awake stint. Blew through 4.5k I didn't have to begin with. Got swabbed and picked up a DUI for driving under the influence of cocaine. Had countless run ins with people. Barely ate a thing so lost over 10kg in bodyweight. Went suicidal towards the end felt very unwell both mentally and physically, so much so I went cold turkey despite being sat beside someone with a half ounce of gear still left.

All the problems it's caused me and the suffering after was just not worth it. I'm taking this as a major lesson it's time to sort myself out. I'm mid 30s now and can't be continuing such destructive behavior. I want better for both myself and everyone around me. Rather than to be this toxic person who causes everyone nothing but stress and upset.

I've made some wrong choices and done some bad shit. I can deal with that. I've been depressed and so low I've felt the bottom. I can deal with that. What I refuse to do is live there, at the bottom, constantly making wrong choices and feeling low. We have to recognise our mistakes and want to do better to succeed. If I screw up please refer me to this post, I don't want to loose myself again.
 
elgoucho9 said:
I won't lie mate it's probably the most off the rails I've been. I've done much longer amounts of time smoking crack than the mere 3 weeks I was slipping there, but those 3 weeks was proper bad. IV'ing both B & W, nearly overdosed a couple of times, very little sleep did a 7 days awake stint. Blew through 4.5k I didn't have to begin with. Got swabbed and picked up a DUI for driving under the influence of cocaine. Had countless run ins with people. Barely ate a thing so lost over 10kg in bodyweight. Went suicidal towards the end felt very unwell both mentally and physically, so much so I went cold turkey despite being sat beside someone with a half ounce of gear still left.

All the problems it's caused me and the suffering after was just not worth it. I'm taking this as a major lesson it's time to sort myself out. I'm mid 30s now and can't be continuing such destructive behavior. I want better for both myself and everyone around me. Rather than to be this toxic person who causes everyone nothing but stress and upset.

I've made some wrong choices and done some bad shit. I can deal with that. I've been depressed and so low I've felt the bottom. I can deal with that. What I refuse to do is live there, at the bottom, constantly making wrong choices and feeling low. We have to recognise our mistakes and want to do better to succeed. If I screw up please refer me to this post, I don't want to loose myself again.
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Ha mate I'd never rub your face in it, but I totally get where you're coming from. I'm 38 and feel like I'm starting again, yet again, but at least you're doing something about it. Well done for not caving when there was a half ounce within reach. That shows real grit. Keep going and if you fuck up, try and learn from it.
Much respect braaaaaah x
 
See this sounds like a mad thing to say for someone who's spent 3 weeks shooting up but I'm not a junkie. I'm not a heroin addict either. I started dabbling in 2014 and only used it 5 times up til 2022. Then more recently I lost alot of money succumbing to the crack cocaine habit I had, when the money ran out I thought ill try just smoking a bit of brown to keep the cravings at bay. Before you know it I'm hanging around anyone who's got gear, IV'ing everything trying to squeeze the most out of it because I've no money left.

At some point in the whole fuck it up things got so grim I couldn't look myself in the mirror anymore. I knew I was lost and could no longer continue the binge. Even with the person beside me sat smoking and IV'ing brown, offering me constantly, there was no appeal left in it. I would rather face the withdrawals of it coming out of my system than continue on a path where i see myself stuck there at rock bottom feeling hopeless.

Yes the withdrawals were absolutely hell. I spent 4-5 days in bed. Severe nausea and shitting liquid. Maybe this will teach me. If it doesn't then I really am a prick. I nearly Od'd a couple of times shooting white after the brown. Proper fucked myself up. Health still doesnt feel right and i doubt it will for a good few weeks yet, but now I am back in a routine and facing my demons rather than hide them like I was before. That alone makes it all worth it.

And i wasn't joking bro. If I fuck up I request a PM linking me to these posts. It's a Harm Reduction forum, consider it you'd be doing me a favour.
 
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