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Gooday H&R!! This is a safe nonjudgmental space for anyone feeling like venting about anything bothering them~

welcome @JasmineAsh <3 ---- The only thing bothering me today is that i let myself slip up into ethanol enough to require a diazepam taper and that is dumb. i know better than that. but going forward, onward and upward.
 
cdin said:
welcome @JasmineAsh <3 ---- The only thing bothering me today is that i let myself slip up into ethanol enough to require a diazepam taper and that is dumb. i know better than that. but going forward, onward and upward.
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I know you well enough to be sure that this slip is a bump in your path of recovery and not a fall into old habits, you're more than strong enough to kill your ethanol addiction <3

May Allah bless you with a complete recovery~
 
Yeah I kinda slipped like cdin a couple weeks ago. It was different substance but the fact remains that the self loathing was there. Always is when I mess with that self destruct button when things are going well.
Still moving forward so letting it go now.
Thanks for asking I did share this with my therapist but it's my most "bothersome" recent escape ATM.
Peace
 
Lil'LinaptkSix said:
Yeah I kinda slipped like cdin a couple weeks ago. It was different substance but the fact remains that the self loathing was there. Always is when I mess with that self destruct button when things are going well.
Still moving forward so letting it go now.
Thanks for asking I did share this with my therapist but it's my most "bothersome" recent escape ATM.
Peace
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I am very glad you're taking it so well, and even happier that you have a therapist you can trust enough to share that kind of stuff with.

But yeah, as i told Cdin, this is just a bump in your road of recovery, and i am sure you will get to the end of it despite everything <3

If there's anything bothering you, i would be happy to hear you out~

Take care and be safe buddy ^~^
 
JasmineAsh said:
Hai~

If anyone has anything bothering their day, feel free to talk about it here~

This is *your* space, and anything bothering you, you can feel free to vent about it~

Take care, and i hope you have a lovely pleasant rest of your day~ <3
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Love to see this Jasmine! Thank you for making the post. ❤️

I’ll go, I have woken at 6am with awful joint pain, much worse than usual and had to give in and take a PRN med. Rain really destroys my joints, I remember my granny telling me she knew when rain was coming and I secretly thought she was nuts but I understand it now! Poor granny! I need some hot water bottles on my shoulders stat! 😂
 
MsDiz said:
Love to see this Jasmine! Thank you for making the post. ❤️

I’ll go, I have woken at 6am with awful joint pain, much worse than usual and had to give in and take a PRN med. Rain really destroys my joints, I remember my granny telling me she knew when rain was coming and I secretly thought she was nuts but I understand it now! Poor granny! I need some hot water bottles on my shoulders stat! 😂
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You're much welcome MsDiz~ <3

What's making water upset your joints that makes them feel so bad? :< (If you don't mind me asking this question of course, if it would make you upset i would rather you keep it to yourself then, your comfort matters ❤️)

Also what's a PRN med? Sorry, not knowledgeable on the world of drugs like y'all here are ^^'

And granny having her personal rainometer is definitely very useful for some situations 😂 (jokes aside, i hope granny is doing oki~).

And how can hot water help your shoulders?
 
JasmineAsh said:
You're much welcome MsDiz~ <3

What's making water upset your joints that makes them feel so bad? :< (If you don't mind me asking this question of course, if it would make you upset i would rather you keep it to yourself then, your comfort matters ❤️)

Also what's a PRN med? Sorry, not knowledgeable on the world of drugs like y'all here are ^^'

And granny having her personal rainometer is definitely very useful for some situations 😂 (jokes aside, i hope granny is doing oki~).

And how can hot water help your shoulders?
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I have a condition called Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome (hyper mobility type). A PRN med is "pro re nata" which means that I only take it when I need it.

The heat helps my joints quite a bit, heat is a great tool for a lot of different types of pain and thankfully I felt much better this morning when I woke up.

Granny unfortunately died 12 years ago but she was 93 and she lived a full life, she came out with lots of hilarious stuff (she had pretty severe dementia at the end, thankfully she was happy and not in any way upset), her and I had a great relationship, I was her legal guardian and I looked after her really well.
 
JasmineAsh said:
What's making water upset your joints that makes them feel so bad?
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I think it's more changes in atmospheric pressure and other factors known and unknown. What I mean is that it's not so much the water as it is the atmosphere.
When it gets cold my middle back aches and it is my belief that it is from contracting soft tissue which leads to tightness and pains.
Heating pads rock I agree with MD.
BTW: Are you artificial intelligence? No judgment if you are I am just curious.
Best wishes and be well
<3
 
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I am feeling sad today. Not sure why but it is not so comfortable.
What bothers me most I think is that I cannot pinpoint the cause.
I know I cannot be up all the time but still I seek balance. Maybe this is part of the process.
Not sad... more like pensive with that strange feeling that doom is just around the corner. Not scared just, well, maybe it is sad.
😆
Best to you all.
One
 
I've been feeling iffy this week, slipped up with my kratom taper, back to step 0, may have to end up going the route many have suggested, with naltrexone.
Not sure why I'm struggling with kratom so much.. When in the past I was able to detox and get clean from hard opiate use. I was a silly goof ball allowing my self to get addicted to such large amounts for sure.


Alana xx
 
AlanaaBanana said:
Re:dose
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Sorry: Regarding dosage with kratom. 😂 Thanks for the chuckle.
AlanaaBanana said:
You there too?
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I have been there but trying to make sense of the layout, the age gap and the difficulty I have reading and typing so small that I had to let it go.
I think BL Discord is a great platform for some it just didn't fit me well. There is also a connection to a not so happy time with discord (not BL but a private conversation a few years ago with a friend) and this may well be the main reason I shy away.
 
Lil'LinaptkSix said:
Sorry: Regarding dosage with kratom. 😂 Thanks for the chuckle.

I have been there but trying to make sense of the layout, the age gap and the difficulty I have reading and typing so small that I had to let it go.
I think BL Discord is a great platform for some it just didn't fit me well. There is also a connection to a not so happy time with discord (not BL but a private conversation a few years ago with a friend) and this may well be the main reason I shy away.
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Yeah that's my bad sorry! haha. We have a staffer who runs a place called Re:Dose.

Though I'll repost it; I'm currently @ 20-30 grams a day, at my worst when I jumped from opiates to kratom I was at around 60g~ a day.


Yeah I can see that, with discord completely understandable, I jumped from tripsits IRC to discord years back, it took a while to get use to the layout. Discord can be quite toxic at times, so I completely understand ya there. I'm sorry ya had that happen :( (My self had met plenty of people who I spoke to privately that were just upright toxic, not on BL discord though, private conversations)
 
AlanaaBanana said:
Discord can be quite toxic at times, so I completely understand ya there. I'm sorry ya had that happen :(
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It wasnt the toxicity it was a loss of life that I felt a deep connection to... still do. Every time I opened discord I see him but he is not active anymore (of course) and I cannot help but to scroll through our conversations. Yeah, it is bitter sweet to say the least. It was not a public interaction or tied to any "channel" and know that I could never remove him from my account so there it is....
Anyway:
I had an early client this AM and had to get to sleep early to find that when I got to her house she was in the hospital so no work today at the time of this posting.
The dropping from 60g to about half that is impressive, IMO. I also feel that you could cut the 20-30g dose in half again and not notice much of an issue (how long have you been at this dose? ). Kratom is funny that way in my experiences. Do you think that your current dose is causing health or financial issues? Any other substances taken these days? Curious is all.
What mod position do you hold on discord? I think I may have a title there but the handle is PtahTek or Ptah not sure anymore. I think I was given an honorary position but sorry to say I cannot be of any assistance there.
Hope your days goes well and best to you and yours.
Peace
 
Let me get it out somewhere it is bothering me but I deserve the pain I guess.

My whole life is a dilemma and they tell me to be grateful WTF at least I have a car and can escape their society into undeveloped nature
 
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