• S E X
    L O V E +
    R E L A T I O N S H I P S


    ❤️ Welcome Guest! ❤️


    Posting Guidelines Bluelight Rules
  • SLR Moderators: Senior Staff

AMA Ask A Trans Sex Worker (Almost) Anything

Eligiu

Bluelight Crew
Joined
Jul 8, 2017
Messages
1,428
@arrall prompted me to do this so here you go. I worked as a sex worker from 2016-2017 during my years of IV meth, heroin, codeine, Xanax, DXM and weed blur during the first two years of my law degree after becoming homeless once running away from my parents house.

My first incident of sex work was purely accidental and just sort of unfolded naturally enough, though I wasn't entirely sold on it being a good idea. Over time however I needed more money to pay for my drugs and I would put ads up on 'Craigslist' back when this was a thing advertising myself as a 'ftm (female to male) tranny (I was very kind to myself during this period of time, clearly) slut so attract as many men as possible to get the highest bidder to score whatever drugs I could source that night.

I stopped doing that almost immediately after a then friend sort of intervened after I went on a two week long binge and lost 7kg in two weeks when I was left unattended at home during the uni break away from him and my other friend, and my housemate (all of whom were away). This friend asked me how I'd been paying for the drugs while homeless, on student payments while barely working and I told him he wouldn't like the answer after he demanded to know whether I was breaking the law. Reassuring him that I wasn't I cryptically explained it and it dawned on him with him blurring out that there was 'no way that's good for your mental health's and boy was he right.

I didn't set foot near sex work again for around 5 years, at which point I decided to dabble again but to do it as an escort (yes there is a difference between a sex worker and an escort. I'd say my previous job was sex work but my current is escorting). Whereas I used to get $50-$150 per hour to be treated terribly, I was now asking for $150-$200 initially before pulling my prices up to $250 per half hour, $500 per hour (incall), $1000 for outcall per hour and $2000 for overnight.

I have some reliable customers who are willing to pay the higher prices, some who dropped off when I upped them, but generally these days it's pretty chill and I only do what I want.

I can be pretty brutal to potential clients who rub me the wrong way, act too demanding or pushy, don't respect no for an answer, want free pictures when I'm a discreet service, or don't abide by my 'no messaging me after 8pm rule' I use to weed out the people who can follow simple instructions.

I made one creep beg for me to stop bullying him after he relentlessly harassed me despite me saying no to booking him repeatedly once every fortnight or so due to him underpaying me twice when I initially first started up again l, before I eventually blocked his number only for him to message me on 2 consecutive numbers following me blocking the second one as well, until one night I was high on gear and just sent him like 30 texts ripping into him for every imaginable flaw and calling him out on being manipulative because he 'apologised' then asked for a booking straight away which immediately made me pissed because I hate manipulative people. Once I was done I left him to stew before I 'apologised' for my behaviour to see if he was dumb enough to think I meant it. He was. So then I had another go at him. Every once in a while I send him a fake apology and now be begs me to leave him alone. I just said 'now do you understand what it's like being harassed by someone repeatedly when you don't want them to talk to you at all?' and he doesn't reply.

So yeah. It sounds mean but he honestly was filthy and pushy and took advantage of me and in this job you have to stick up for yourself when you get the chance. It might come off as pretty brutal, but the fact is if he isn't able to even respect me saying no probably close to 50 times what on earth would make me confident that he would respect the boundaries of our initial agreement, given I know for a fact that the second time I had him booked him we agreed to foreplay but he pressured me into full on sex then didn't pay the extra $150 for sex even though he knew there was an extra charge. So basically, I had zero confidence that he would listen to me saying no to sexual acts I don't want to do.

All questions welcome.

Just don't ask me about my junk. I don't feel like my genitals deserve to be the hot topic of the conversation.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
What would you say has been your most positive experience in the profession?
I've heard a lot about your negative and awful experiences, but I'm curious about the positive side of the job and I'm guessing that you've probably had some better experiences working as an escort.
 
@arrall prompted me to do this so here you go. I worked as a sex worker from 2016-2017 during my years of IV meth, heroin, codeine, Xanax, DXM and weed blur during the first two years of my law degree after becoming homeless once running away from my parents house.

Not strictly about sex work but do you have a portrayal of a trans man in media that you like? (I know there is not a great deal to choose from) or equally a portrayal of sex work that you think speaks to the truth of it?
 
What would you say has been your most positive experience in the profession?
I've heard a lot about your negative and awful experiences, but I'm curious about the positive side of the job and I'm guessing that you've probably had some better experiences working as an escort.

Sex wise, a very polite, very friendly, quite handsome young 24 year old submissive man who just wanted me to twist his nipples aggressively until his time was up then he came in the sink because he's that much of a sub.

Escorting wise, once I was taken to an expensive theatre show as the date to a 40 something year old divorced man coming to terms with his sexuality. Felt a bit weird being a kind of 'trans stepping stone' but he did pay me $5000+ for the whole evening and overnight (it was a 4 hour long theatre show lol) and he was actually very nice.

My other nice positive was a mid 30s guy who would book me to read his favourite books out loud to him for an hour while he went to bed. I'd get there, set up, start a timer, start reading, read until the timer almost went off and leave after the hour. He was usually asleep in 20 minutes but he did pay for the hour so I felt obliged to stay. I had to ask him never to request me to read War and Peace though because I would refuse.
 
Not strictly about sex work but do you have a portrayal of a trans man in media that you like? (I know there is not a great deal to choose from) or equally a portrayal of sex work that you think speaks to the truth of it?

I honestly don't really know of any portrayals of trans men in media that come to my mind. We are so invisible in media that it's a huge deal when we get any representation but I seem to always not watch it. I remember on tumblr years ago there was a series of gifs of a trans guy taking his shirt off and someone commenting to a third party about his scars and the person they said it to said something like 'don't be rude, you have no idea how hard he's worked to be able to take his shirt off in public' and that still speaks to me. My scars are basically invisible now that I've been post surgery for so long and covered them in a giant chest tattoo, but I was pretty self conscious at the start.

I don't really watch many things about sex work but I remember watching the Basketball Diaries and there is a scene where the main character does sex work to score more heroin and he is just so disgusted with himself while he does it and looks like he is about to cry that I would call that accurate to sex work, not to higher class escorting. I probably had that same look of self disgust and shame on my face for most of 2016-2017
 
advertising myself as a 'ftm (female to male) tranny (I was very kind to myself during this period of time, clearly) slut so attract as many men as possible
I'm confused here, how does this work?
Erm.........how would you have sex may I ask?

Like was it vaginal or anal?
Were the men gay?

My mind is blown, I have to think what I wanna ask here as my mind is melting right now.

@mal3volent
How does this work my brother?
 
My other nice positive was a mid 30s guy who would book me to read his favourite books out loud to him for an hour while he went to bed. I'd get there, set up, start a timer, start reading, read until the timer almost went off and leave after the hour. He was usually asleep in 20 minutes but he did pay for the hour so I felt obliged to stay.

jakeglobox-jake.gif
 
I'm confused here, how does this work?
Erm.........how would you have sex may I ask?

Like was it vaginal or anal?
Were the men gay?

My mind is blown, I have to think what I wanna ask here as my mind is melting right now.

@mal3volent
How does this work my brother?

I wouldn't know but I'd imagine they're mostly heterosexual men who want vaginal sex and are turned on by the idea of getting it from a trans guy.
 
I'm confused here, how does this work?
Erm.........how would you have sex may I ask?

Like was it vaginal or anal?
Were the men gay?

My mind is blown, I have to think what I wanna ask here as my mind is melting right now.

@mal3volent
How does this work my brother?

Depends on what they asked for but the majority of them didn't want anal. They can get a regular gay escort for that. The whole point of hiring me is for something different which is out of the ordinary.

Yes they are gay. I pass as male with clothes on which is hard to ignore when having sex so while my genitals obviously don't pass as male the rest of my body does.

I don't know about the ones who I did sex work with in 2016-2017 as they were pretty into misgendering me and degrading me like some kind of kink, but the men I escort for now all identify as gay and I wouldn't agree to see anyone who doesn't do so.
 
If you explicitly label yourself as a 'trans' sex worker in the title, then of course people are gonna be intrigued by what exactly is in your pants. So you probably will get such questions.

Not really, two people have already managed to ask me questions not about that topic and a third barely avoided it. It's not actually that difficult to do. You just restrain yourself from asking that question and think of a more interesting question to ask that actually brings value into the conversation, rather than making a stranger online talk about their genitals.

I've answered what type of sex we have, that should be enough for any half intelligent person to imply the information they want to know about my junk, is it not? Seems like the topic has already been covered in a roundabout way.
 
Do you think you get a lot of men who are self-hating gays but because you said you pass as a man with your clothes on so they get the attraction they have to men but because you have a vagina can fool themselves they not being gay . I would not give a fuck if i was gay men are better to talk to can do shit loads of drugs are at their sexual peak same time pep pill i be fucking every night . Dont think i could suck cock or take it which make me a shit sexual partner
 
Do you think you get a lot of men who are self-hating gays but because you said you pass as a man with your clothes on so they get the attraction they have to men but because you have a vagina can fool themselves they not being gay . I would not give a fuck if i was gay men are better to talk to can do shit loads of drugs are at their sexual peak same time pep pill i be fucking every night . Dont think i could suck cock or take it which make me a shit sexual partner

Depends which era you're talking about. I think a lot of the men from 2016-2017 just viewed me as mainly an object and a fetish and to an extent the same is true now (though not exclusively). I'd say more of them are closeted gays who want to experiment rather than self hating. For a lot more of them it's a fetish thing, they are specifically interested in me because I'm a trans man and that's why I can increase my prices and retail clients.

These days I generally ask how my client identifies and given they're searching me up on a gay escort website it's fair to assume most of them are comfortable with their sexuality enough to be looking there in the first place, then I suppose they happen across my profile and because it's viewed as a bit kinky and unusual to have sex with a trans person in some circles or its something they've always wanted to try they contact me.

The other point is that with some of the men who fetishise me I can tell they looked for a trans male escort because they've tried getting them on Grindr and been rejected so paying is their only option. I mean I still use Grindr for occasional hook ups for my own enjoyment (being asexual this isn't a frequent occurrence) and I routinely reject men on there for fetishising me but will happily sleep with a nice decent kind person I run into.

But again with escorting a lot of the time I actually don't have to have sex with the men. They might take me out to dinner, or we'll go to the movies. I tend to prioritise those clients as I don't really enjoy sex that much. Basically I prefer clients who just want the 'date' or 'partner' experience or who just want to look at me while they compliment me and jerk off rather than the ones who want full sex.

So no, I don't think many of them are self hating and view it as any less of an issue because I don't have a penis. If anything that's a source of interest for them and they're comfortable enough in their sexuality as gay men that they don't view fucking s trans man as changing that.
 
I wouldn't know but I'd imagine they're mostly heterosexual men who want vaginal sex and are turned on by the idea of getting it from a trans guy.

In 2016-2017 I would tend to agree with you but currently the men I escort for all identify as gay. They found me on a gay male escorting website and my profile only says I'm trans in the description not my name, so they would have had to go through all the other gay male escorts in my city before me to get to my profile which means to an extent they're looking for a gay experience. At most, some might be what a previous commenter said possible self hating gays but for the most part they're either closeted or openly gay men who either find it interesting or very uninteresting to have sex with someone like me.
 
It would surprise me if the answer was yes. A straight woman is gonna want cock and a gay woman is gonna want, well, another actual WOMAN.
I have met cisgender bisexual/pansexual females who were into trans men, but most do indeed seem to prefer cisgender males.
 
I have met cisgender bisexual/pansexual females who were into trans men, but most do indeed seem to prefer cisgender males.
what in the everloving fuck even is 'pansexual'. Unless you're taking the word literally, in which case it means 'would fuck absolutely anything'.

There's 2 basic sexes, therefore there's only 3 possible sexual orientations, straight, gay or bi. If you can be attracted to both males and females then you're bi, period.

As far as I can gather calling yourself 'pan' translates as 'I sleep with men and women and also THE TRANS because I'm so nice and open-minded'. Thus putting trans men and women into a seperate category which is kind of insulting. I've never once come across a single person using the pansexual label who wasn't insufferably narcissistic and doing it purely to virtue-signal how morally superior they were to us 'mere' bisexuals.
 
Last edited:
Top