Drunk on Kombucha
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Oct 29, 2021
- Messages
- 52
Hello all, I planned to revise and organize this into a more thorough report but I do not see it happening very soon and these are just my notes from throughout the night and random snippets of conversations with friends. I'd also like to be able to include something on the long term effects of this experience so perhaps I'll have input on that by the time a revision is made. Some of these notes I feel sound a bit like psychobabble, but some of them still ring very true to me. I like mixing things up and experimenting with amino acids and some of the mildly psychoactive herbs I have which I mostly stuck to using in doses ranging from 1/5th a total normal recommended dose to not more than 2/3rds. I feel like beta alanine, DL-phenylalanine, and cacao/cocoa bean extract may be pro tools when it comes to 5-mapb as, in my 2 experiences now, 5-mapb is more sedating than stimulating and they manage to add a bit of enhancement and brightness to the experience.
Also, big shout out to the man @G_Chem . After my first experience with 5-mapb, I felt like it was almost completely perfect but just wished it had a slight bit more stimulation. I figured they would be good to combine with no issues but had no idea the best ratios and could not find any reports or info until stumbling upon his research. Overall, I found this combo far more therapeutic than 5-mapb or mdma alone. With just 5-mapb, I felt insanely good but do not recall having to confront any very deep or personal emotional aspects, trauma, or hurt within myself. With this combo, profound and meaningful realizations and reflections rose to the surface naturally and clearly and I felt no inclination to resist confronting and pondering them. Some of this is a bit personal, but I feel no need to be afraid of that.
Anyway, to the notes.
10/31/21 - "Holding a baby"
12:50pm- 1.2gs San Pedro powder
8:30- 4.3gs kratom
-------------
11:20 - ~51-57mg 5-mapb under tongue 6 minutes (burnt tongue, do not recommend for longer than a minute or two)
11:27- 1.6gs magnesium citrate and ~30mg CBD
12:03- out of shower, very mild pupil dilation, think I feel something
12:12- coming on strong, definitely feel it. Slight confusion, slight clarity, similar to mushroom peak. Feeling flood begin
12:14- 0.96gs Golden Teachers + 1 Firefly (capsule with 33mg MDMA and 275mg psilocybe cubensis)
12:24- meditated for a bit, seems to have plateaued a bit for now. Feeling perfectly still, very calm and serene. Eyes open and vision seems distorted, hard to describe--like everything is sort of out of focus. Typing swiftly, clearly and with ease. Feel clear and clean
12:30- feeling pristine, slight stimulation seems to be kicking in
12:35-more CBD, cigarette
Music, instant esrgasm. Sounds perfect (DMNDS & Salasnich - State of Mind ft Eko)
12:52- slight jaw clenching, 1.6gs magnesium and 700mg vitamin c-------shroom visuals really setting in
Stimulation and floored calmness/relaxation keep swapping places
1:00- "A lot of my vices and the things I do that I don't know why I keep doing them when I know I shouldn't and wish I wouldn't, it is like my choice to do them anyway is just wanting control over *something* even if it is a choice to not grow and stay the same and do stuff that's not healthy for me
Why not just make the choice to be better and healthier each moment then?
If only it always seemed so clear
"Maybe it is also like a self sabotage thing. Like how kids do when they r frustrated"
I think so
I know part of why I drink is because for whatever reason I can't seem to hardly enjoy any moment of feeling stuck at work and then when I get home it is like drinking helps me make up for the time I didn't have that day to do what I want and all the things I feel like would be better for me. And then drinking also makes it easier to not do the things that feel like work at home even though those should be my priorities. Everything after work is just like a distraction from feeling trapped all day
1:12- visuals heavy, rolling and tripping hard
1:28-
It just kinda clicked. Talking about my wanting to control everything. My mom is a control freak and always tries to control other people while barely managing her life or her self. Then, I think about my dad. No longer being able to tolerate being around her, loving their kids more than anything but she is taking them and since she makes all the money can basically control if he ever gets to see them again or not. Because if it is not her way, she is not giving him his way. Then, with being an addict, probably having little control over that or his life in general, he took the only control he could and ended it. It is really sad but i understand it and i don't blame him for doing the best he knew how until he just couldn't anymore. I still remember and hold close the love i so strongly felt from him but maybe he thought that leaving the world that way would have a better impact on my life than him being there ever could. I know he would be proud of me but i think he'd like to see me doing better and not heading down the same path as him
1:43 cigarette. Felt almost insanely cold outside but sitting and being still I feel very warm. Trees look like kaleidoscopes
----~~~ saw moving light in sky, like it slowly moved down to hide behind the trees but wanted me to be aware of its presence
1:59‐CBD weed, realizations about Luna being like a soul that was thrust into a cats body
2:25- cigarette, llost time--idealations about stars being UFO space centers, government buildings hiding ET overlords, 7 ET races all racing each other, just want to go to their home back in the stars
2:35- 300mg beta alanine, 100mg DL-phenylalanine, 250mg cocoa bean extract, 700mg vit c, 1g magnesium
3:30- slight head/jawache, ala + alc pill
3:39- CBD weed, crying happy tears
3:48- cigarette, seems to be slowing down a little. Feeling like wanting something extra
3:55- 1 more firefly and 50mg mesc hcl
4:29- 300mg beta alanine, 50mg DL-phenylalanine, 300mg cocoa bean extract
4:46- literally every time hitting the CBD pipe, drawing feeling nothing, then whole face forces my eyes closed followed by immediate tears/moisture
4:52- cigarette. Firefly redose seems to have smoothed things out a little
5:48- bulksupplements multivitamin, 250mg agmatine
"Holding a baby"
At this point, the profound mysticism and beauty of the experience felt to me like holding a new born baby, fresh into the world, an innocent and entire human life held in your arms. So I decided to tile the report Holding a baby, which I'm still not entirely sure about, but whatever
5:58- cigarette. The moon appeared and appears as if it is stretching out in multiple layers of many colors. Also appears to be in a + shape
It is all about making the healthiest choice first. Following positive growth becoming accustomed to clean living
6:29- 1 more BS vitamin and ALA +ALC pill, followed by cigarette
7:30- 3.75gs Kratom powder (1g green vein, 2.75gs red vein), 1g vitamin C and 1.5gs magnesium. Feeling ready for bed maybe soon
~8:00- 500mg valerian root
8:30- sleeeep
11:05- wake up
10/31/21, 2:11am- Woah. Are the stars UFO gods?
"Maaaaaan, I'm convinced that some of the stars are craft of some sort that move in conjunction with the stars to blend in..."
11:41am- So, I was having some very deep and emotional realizations about myself and my life so far last night. They were coming profoundly naturally and easily. Then, I notice orion directly overhead and am in awe. After staring at it for a while, something clicks in my brain that there is an orange light in the corner of my vision. I focus on it and it appears as if it could be moving away off into the distance, but it slowly lowers down (very very far away) and stops just to where it is barely revealed behind tree leaves. It was like it wanted me to be aware of it and then sort of what you have said about gods and stuff clicked and I wondered if this was some type of primordial "god" I was witnessing (but viewing me specifically from very far away yet like it can see me perfectly clearly). Then thoughts of that Rick and Morty episode began to feel very real where earth is on some type of universal reality TV show. I got the sense that something in the last 100 years has very much changed. Maybe government buildings like the Pentagon and the White House are lairs for ET overlords (surely they are not just for 1 "man" who is so so so heavily guarded solely because he threw enough words and money around and "won") and I started to wonder if the 7 continents are like several different ET factions. Some of them want nothing but control and obedience from their citizens and to try and implement this across the globe as they take over and then others are much more willing to allow their suspects to have more freedom in exchange for breakthroughs and advancements because all that faction wants is to go back home where it came from. And I began to wonder, is that not what we all want in some sense? Is there not this lost memory of a long ago and potentially very far off paradise where we at once felt much more home? It could make sense that we have ancestral/DNA encoded memory of man as he evolved and now simply not living like we used to, close to earth, causes us to long for and miss [rest of text was apparently too long to copy and paste all of from messaging app]
~~~11:50am- 1 moringa dose, mullein, myrrh gum capsule, ALA +ALC pill
12:30- Coffee almost done and feeling more awake and clear. But still a little slow
12:55- 260mg cocoa bean extract, 60-70mg rhodiola extract, ~170mg passionflower extract, 50mg vit d, 1.2gs vit c, 2.6gs magnesium, 500mg NAC, 1 tsp~3gs spirulina powder
2:10- 3.5gs Kratom powder (2.3gs green vein and 1.2gs red vein)
~1-1.5 hour, very pleasant nap at some point between. Awake feeling like a nap was the right choice and not feeling terribly groggy like I normally do after any kind of nap
5:00- 120mg rhodiola extract, 220mg passionflower extract, 200mg beta alanine, 700mg vit C, 200mg agmatine, 800mg magnesium, 1/2 tsp spirulina
5:05- yerba mate, respiratory tea, rooibos and green tea
From this point on, I began to feel a bit more clear and awake, while still very foggy and tired. But relaxed and extremely comfortable. I still very much feel like the experience is with me.
Overall, this may be my go-to combo to replicate in the future, but I'm interested in adjusting the doses and potentially adding a mini/micro dose of LSD at the beginning. The 5-mapb came on in an intensity I was very content with, but I think a higher initial dose of MDMA could have led to a slightly more full feeling experience. I wasn't sure I would need the booster but ultimately it did help smooth things out and next time I will take it much closer to the initial dose and would potentially consider taking the mushrooms alongside the 5-mapb rather than once it kicked in.
Thanks for reading
नमस्ते
Also, big shout out to the man @G_Chem . After my first experience with 5-mapb, I felt like it was almost completely perfect but just wished it had a slight bit more stimulation. I figured they would be good to combine with no issues but had no idea the best ratios and could not find any reports or info until stumbling upon his research. Overall, I found this combo far more therapeutic than 5-mapb or mdma alone. With just 5-mapb, I felt insanely good but do not recall having to confront any very deep or personal emotional aspects, trauma, or hurt within myself. With this combo, profound and meaningful realizations and reflections rose to the surface naturally and clearly and I felt no inclination to resist confronting and pondering them. Some of this is a bit personal, but I feel no need to be afraid of that.
Anyway, to the notes.
10/31/21 - "Holding a baby"
12:50pm- 1.2gs San Pedro powder
8:30- 4.3gs kratom
-------------
11:20 - ~51-57mg 5-mapb under tongue 6 minutes (burnt tongue, do not recommend for longer than a minute or two)
11:27- 1.6gs magnesium citrate and ~30mg CBD
12:03- out of shower, very mild pupil dilation, think I feel something
12:12- coming on strong, definitely feel it. Slight confusion, slight clarity, similar to mushroom peak. Feeling flood begin
12:14- 0.96gs Golden Teachers + 1 Firefly (capsule with 33mg MDMA and 275mg psilocybe cubensis)
12:24- meditated for a bit, seems to have plateaued a bit for now. Feeling perfectly still, very calm and serene. Eyes open and vision seems distorted, hard to describe--like everything is sort of out of focus. Typing swiftly, clearly and with ease. Feel clear and clean
12:30- feeling pristine, slight stimulation seems to be kicking in
12:35-more CBD, cigarette
Music, instant esrgasm. Sounds perfect (DMNDS & Salasnich - State of Mind ft Eko)
12:52- slight jaw clenching, 1.6gs magnesium and 700mg vitamin c-------shroom visuals really setting in
Stimulation and floored calmness/relaxation keep swapping places
1:00- "A lot of my vices and the things I do that I don't know why I keep doing them when I know I shouldn't and wish I wouldn't, it is like my choice to do them anyway is just wanting control over *something* even if it is a choice to not grow and stay the same and do stuff that's not healthy for me
Why not just make the choice to be better and healthier each moment then?
If only it always seemed so clear
"Maybe it is also like a self sabotage thing. Like how kids do when they r frustrated"
I think so
I know part of why I drink is because for whatever reason I can't seem to hardly enjoy any moment of feeling stuck at work and then when I get home it is like drinking helps me make up for the time I didn't have that day to do what I want and all the things I feel like would be better for me. And then drinking also makes it easier to not do the things that feel like work at home even though those should be my priorities. Everything after work is just like a distraction from feeling trapped all day
1:12- visuals heavy, rolling and tripping hard
1:28-
It just kinda clicked. Talking about my wanting to control everything. My mom is a control freak and always tries to control other people while barely managing her life or her self. Then, I think about my dad. No longer being able to tolerate being around her, loving their kids more than anything but she is taking them and since she makes all the money can basically control if he ever gets to see them again or not. Because if it is not her way, she is not giving him his way. Then, with being an addict, probably having little control over that or his life in general, he took the only control he could and ended it. It is really sad but i understand it and i don't blame him for doing the best he knew how until he just couldn't anymore. I still remember and hold close the love i so strongly felt from him but maybe he thought that leaving the world that way would have a better impact on my life than him being there ever could. I know he would be proud of me but i think he'd like to see me doing better and not heading down the same path as him
1:43 cigarette. Felt almost insanely cold outside but sitting and being still I feel very warm. Trees look like kaleidoscopes
----~~~ saw moving light in sky, like it slowly moved down to hide behind the trees but wanted me to be aware of its presence
1:59‐CBD weed, realizations about Luna being like a soul that was thrust into a cats body
2:25- cigarette, llost time--idealations about stars being UFO space centers, government buildings hiding ET overlords, 7 ET races all racing each other, just want to go to their home back in the stars
2:35- 300mg beta alanine, 100mg DL-phenylalanine, 250mg cocoa bean extract, 700mg vit c, 1g magnesium
3:30- slight head/jawache, ala + alc pill
3:39- CBD weed, crying happy tears
3:48- cigarette, seems to be slowing down a little. Feeling like wanting something extra
3:55- 1 more firefly and 50mg mesc hcl
4:29- 300mg beta alanine, 50mg DL-phenylalanine, 300mg cocoa bean extract
4:46- literally every time hitting the CBD pipe, drawing feeling nothing, then whole face forces my eyes closed followed by immediate tears/moisture
4:52- cigarette. Firefly redose seems to have smoothed things out a little
5:48- bulksupplements multivitamin, 250mg agmatine
"Holding a baby"
At this point, the profound mysticism and beauty of the experience felt to me like holding a new born baby, fresh into the world, an innocent and entire human life held in your arms. So I decided to tile the report Holding a baby, which I'm still not entirely sure about, but whatever
5:58- cigarette. The moon appeared and appears as if it is stretching out in multiple layers of many colors. Also appears to be in a + shape
It is all about making the healthiest choice first. Following positive growth becoming accustomed to clean living
6:29- 1 more BS vitamin and ALA +ALC pill, followed by cigarette
7:30- 3.75gs Kratom powder (1g green vein, 2.75gs red vein), 1g vitamin C and 1.5gs magnesium. Feeling ready for bed maybe soon
~8:00- 500mg valerian root
8:30- sleeeep
11:05- wake up
10/31/21, 2:11am- Woah. Are the stars UFO gods?
"Maaaaaan, I'm convinced that some of the stars are craft of some sort that move in conjunction with the stars to blend in..."
11:41am- So, I was having some very deep and emotional realizations about myself and my life so far last night. They were coming profoundly naturally and easily. Then, I notice orion directly overhead and am in awe. After staring at it for a while, something clicks in my brain that there is an orange light in the corner of my vision. I focus on it and it appears as if it could be moving away off into the distance, but it slowly lowers down (very very far away) and stops just to where it is barely revealed behind tree leaves. It was like it wanted me to be aware of it and then sort of what you have said about gods and stuff clicked and I wondered if this was some type of primordial "god" I was witnessing (but viewing me specifically from very far away yet like it can see me perfectly clearly). Then thoughts of that Rick and Morty episode began to feel very real where earth is on some type of universal reality TV show. I got the sense that something in the last 100 years has very much changed. Maybe government buildings like the Pentagon and the White House are lairs for ET overlords (surely they are not just for 1 "man" who is so so so heavily guarded solely because he threw enough words and money around and "won") and I started to wonder if the 7 continents are like several different ET factions. Some of them want nothing but control and obedience from their citizens and to try and implement this across the globe as they take over and then others are much more willing to allow their suspects to have more freedom in exchange for breakthroughs and advancements because all that faction wants is to go back home where it came from. And I began to wonder, is that not what we all want in some sense? Is there not this lost memory of a long ago and potentially very far off paradise where we at once felt much more home? It could make sense that we have ancestral/DNA encoded memory of man as he evolved and now simply not living like we used to, close to earth, causes us to long for and miss [rest of text was apparently too long to copy and paste all of from messaging app]
~~~11:50am- 1 moringa dose, mullein, myrrh gum capsule, ALA +ALC pill
12:30- Coffee almost done and feeling more awake and clear. But still a little slow
12:55- 260mg cocoa bean extract, 60-70mg rhodiola extract, ~170mg passionflower extract, 50mg vit d, 1.2gs vit c, 2.6gs magnesium, 500mg NAC, 1 tsp~3gs spirulina powder
2:10- 3.5gs Kratom powder (2.3gs green vein and 1.2gs red vein)
~1-1.5 hour, very pleasant nap at some point between. Awake feeling like a nap was the right choice and not feeling terribly groggy like I normally do after any kind of nap
5:00- 120mg rhodiola extract, 220mg passionflower extract, 200mg beta alanine, 700mg vit C, 200mg agmatine, 800mg magnesium, 1/2 tsp spirulina
5:05- yerba mate, respiratory tea, rooibos and green tea
From this point on, I began to feel a bit more clear and awake, while still very foggy and tired. But relaxed and extremely comfortable. I still very much feel like the experience is with me.
Overall, this may be my go-to combo to replicate in the future, but I'm interested in adjusting the doses and potentially adding a mini/micro dose of LSD at the beginning. The 5-mapb came on in an intensity I was very content with, but I think a higher initial dose of MDMA could have led to a slightly more full feeling experience. I wasn't sure I would need the booster but ultimately it did help smooth things out and next time I will take it much closer to the initial dose and would potentially consider taking the mushrooms alongside the 5-mapb rather than once it kicked in.
Thanks for reading
नमस्ते