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☮ Social ☮ PD Social Talk Thread: If 2020 Was the Dumpster, Can 2021 Be the Fire?

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yeah. S o Antipsychotics are a nightmare.

You need a g/f if you can. Because as much as we love our moms, it's desirable to produce an offspring in this life. Unless you're over 40, in that case forget it.

What are your hobbies or creative paths? Obviously you can write. You may consider some narratives, or journaling. If you need help on that, lmk and I can help.

Yea, touch base with some of us as often as you want. No job, no plans, yeah, it touches a nerve. What my bubs would say in college. Do you what you do, when you can do it. I just worry that you might have taken more than enough LSD for a lifetime. And I'm not favorable to benzos. A little is plenty, too much is not enough.
AutoTripper said:
It's really not actually a case of boredom it's actually a case of distraction and calming my super intense mind and imagination down and managing a very severe anxiety and panic disorder I don't ever feel bored and I could actually genuinely spend time without any substances I just need my own space to be in control of those other aspects I mention above.

When it comes to doctor prescriptions and site antipsychotics there is no way I can take anything like that because I am so badly allergic to old prescription medicines and virtually all over the counter and Internet vitamin supplements and minerals.

In the case of mainstream prescriptions like tablets powders and liquids I'm allergic to it doesn't excipients in virtually every case and almost guaranteed the actual medicines themselves which would cause such intolerably severe respiratory allergenic reaction as well as major digestive malfunction it would kill me quicker then I would get any benefit out of it that's no exaggeration.

It's not actually that I need antipsychotics because I'm really not losing my mind all the plot or my wits or intellect it's just a really hard world and a hard life.

Give me basic physical energy and comfort and simple freedom to live any sort of regular live in a world which is not full of misery and impending doom and I really could be pretty alright. Enjoy your beer run I wasn't sure if you meant right now today if so then that's my preference so you get to have your fun now or if you mean another festival type thing either way have a good time there.
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ions said:
yeah. S o Antipsychotics are a nightmare.

You need a g/f if you can. Because as much as we love our moms, it's desirable to produce an offspring in this life. Unless you're over 40, in that case forget it.

What are your hobbies or creative paths? Obviously you can write. You may consider some narratives, or journaling. If you need help on that, lmk and I can help.

Yea, touch base with some of us as often as you want. No job, no plans, yeah, it touches a nerve. What my bubs would say in college. Do you what you do, when you can do it. I just worry that you might have taken more than enough LSD for a lifetime. And I'm not favorable to benzos. A little is plenty, too much is not enough.
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Another factor you highlight ions. I am actually over 40. 41, nearly 2.

But that would not deny me every fair chance of romance at least.

It was never my ambition to have children ever.

But no level of romance or courting is even an iption ions. Since 2005 like everything else, the sheer toxicity and hirdle of my allergies and resoiratory infectiins alone would make physical romance impossible, and no pleasure anyway, from a breathing and suffocating angle.

I had more friends than I had time for until that time in my life, and options of new freinds turning down like people do on social media now.

There is just no way I could have a female on my life.

I am so tied to the routine of basics too, no energy to spare nor abioity to go,out, live life, do stuff.

Any of the things people do in a relationship except talking.

I'm good st talking, very good. It's my main gift. Writing just helos with language, imagination, philosophicsl musings and more.

IMO writing should always be a prime part of speech therapy.

I reckon I could make an excellent soeech therapist and anti-anxiety coach.

Now...more than a lifetime's worth of LSD! Lol, I didn't realise there was in an official lone drawn determinate sense.

Like, sure even Tutan Karham could have had so much LSD in his chambers, there is nonway there was ever a possibility of him running throughnit in whatever length and kevel of Mortal life he lived.

I have just taken a lot. That though really isn't my biggest problem, And probably would not be a problem at all but the continued pleasure if not for the nerve damage from long Covid and the world where in now vs two years ago.

Benzos, bad news as an addiction ofc. But so was the extreme complex psychosomatic like anxiety and poanic disorder I had in 2019 which made it impossible for me to relax to eat and digest, losing weight down to 50 kg's.

I'm stably 62-63 now no matter how little I eat, and should be 67 minimum, 70 up really.

So it's a life all round without usual possibilities for many parts.
 
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I’m 345lbs now. Before the antipsychotics 11 years ago I was 215lbs. I’m upset really. And those that have wronged me will pay. Not you @AutoTripper but I did make a shitlist.
 
ions said:
yeah. S o Antipsychotics are a nightmare.

You need a g/f if you can. Because as much as we love our moms, it's desirable to produce an offspring in this life. Unless you're over 40, in that case forget it.

What are your hobbies or creative paths? Obviously you can write. You may consider some narratives, or journaling. If you need help on that, lmk and I can help.

Yea, touch base with some of us as often as you want. No job, no plans, yeah, it touches a nerve. What my bubs would say in college. Do you what you do, when you can do it. I just worry that you might have taken more than enough LSD for a lifetime. And I'm not favorable to benzos. A little is plenty, too much is not enough.
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I do really appreciate that too ions thanks.

Lol I already do that. Touch base, often!

Not because I'm some freak who is incapable personality wise of real life engagement.

Or the guy to avoid.

That's the ironic and sometimes infuriating part because I totally am the opposite I always was a magnet for people without trying and I was literally everybody's best friend again without trying. Unconditionally and university at the same time.

I haven't actually changed at all if anything I feel like I'm potentially an infinitely better person today, more aware definitely more educated more in tune with others and life in general much more grounded in myself and who I really am and my natural free expression at all times and I have perfect ability to be in literally any company so I avoid bad company of course if I can't keep the atmosphere to my own liking I will get out of there but that's very rarely Been necessary in my life so far.

If I was simply working any kind of simple job and if I was not restricted by respiratory allergies and the pain and energy it takes simply to be fit to leave my house which is such a disincentive and needs forward planning and I don't like to plan forward when so much pain is involved in the process so that's another factor psychologically which would prevent me from making an appointment say midday next Thursday because I know that I will have to be up by 9 am latest even if I have only slept for three hours in order to rush around the house clearing my lungs with mucus very cleverly but painfully and exhausting Lee to just to make it to the appointment able to breathe and relax for that day and it's such a draining and PTSD installing experience I generally put it off until I absolutely have to do it all can face it but not because I only have X amount of time to reach an appointment and I'm already rushing.


If tomorrow I could get up and never need to think about allergy mucus and managing it again and could just eat a basic diet and use the same apart from benzos very clean non-toxic and physically safe psychoactive substances I currently do or whatever or not...

And just be free to choose where I go and how I live everything would be different in 24 hours time.

Meanwhile I have a mind bursting full of conscious energy and imagination as I always have done and it would drive me crazy if I just sat still and didn't share it meditation or nine meditation so that is a large part of my manic online persona as well.

There is more to it than that too.

My real "hobby", Is philosophy and spirituality and the deeper side of life and understanding and learning about human emotion and people and that side of things rather than fun but ultimately trivial temporary "pursuits" lol.

It is from that angle that I don't really get to a point of boredom because there is always a new angle to consider and rabbit hole to investigate.

LSD helps me with this. And 339 trips last 10 months, Maybe I have made a scene of myself through this time which I do for others actually mostly really drawing the spotlight on myself in as open and exposed a manner I can to take the pressure off other people.

But I still don't feel in peoples minds only am I perhaps granted a little bit of credit even for holding my head together for the most part talking fairly consistentl sense on different levels about different things certainly very lucid and clear about the real daily grinding facts.

Without losing my sense of humour even at some really perilous times temporarily.

High on weed today, and kava now. It's not a normal household situation here I'm just protecting my sensitised nerves by avoiding my mum altogether for a moment but I really don't feel too bad and I have slept a bit.

Just keeping strictly to my own space for now. I try to anyway already.
 
Buzz Lightbeer said:
What an uncharacteristically short post AT (I'm gonna steal "AT" from the previous posters).

Straight to the point! ;)
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It's becoming more characteristic actually Buzz lol!

I now specialise at both ends of the spectrum. 🙂

AT is okay wiith me too any day. 👍
 
TripSitterNZ said:
felt so fogged and depressed yesterday but today im full of life and energy and happy. Fuck i wish i was just stable lol
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I'm stable. Stably depressed. Lol, be careful what you wish for. 😉 I am glad you feel brighter atm. Just remember this. Blow up this feeling, imagine it as a balloon which is always there in any situation and you can choose to step back inside it.

Just a thought or picture came to my mind then.
 
on fucking ket prob gonna msoke up i have md but ehh maybe i wont do it. i quit md last year been 17 months free of it
 
I have those two E's STILL.

I might use them, only if and at an apocalypse.

Because my plan already is tobe on a hundred tabs at the point so that would be an option.

An apocalypse drug box is too often not considered enough, even and I think especially ironically among "preppers".
 
simstim said:
37 for me in November!!!!

I think it's interesting that so many of us are around the same age. How likely is it that at our age we would all congregate on the same internet forum?
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Well, it's still me pleasure to see you kids having fun. I'll just be watching while you play on the swings.

But you will have to cook your own fishfinges I'm afraid.

😀
 
Man, I fucked up, so I’ve been drinking a lot of milk, because it’s very tasty and it packs quite a bit of calories and protein. It was the easiest way to gain weight, I just eat everything I normally do and drink 1-2l on top.
But apparently that’s way too much, and since yesterday/today I’ve gotten a serious acne attack, I feel like a teenager again. My lifts got better but attractiveness way down lol, I really need the latter as I’ve got a third date coming up, which sounds and maybe is pretty serious. Need some leeway for much of the bullshit that tends to come out of my mouth =D
 
Buzz Lightbeer said:
Man, I fucked up, so I’ve been drinking a lot of milk, because it’s very tasty and it packs quite a bit of calories and protein. It was the easiest way to gain weight, I just eat everything I normally do and drink 1-2l on top.
But apparently that’s way too much, and since yesterday/today I’ve gotten a serious acne attack, I feel like a teenager again. My lifts got better but attractiveness way down lol, I really need the latter as I’ve got a third date coming up, which sounds and maybe is pretty serious. Need some leeway for much of the bullshit that tends to come out of my mouth =D
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I wouldn't worry. The only people I ever hear downing people with acne are people who down themselves.

I've never seen a girl and been turned off by acne, but maybe that says more about me and the kind of girls I date.

My ex wife had horrible acne before we got married, but I think it's from being in the Philippines with no air conditioning and using a bandanna to wipe off sweat off her face all the time. Once she got to the states and I turned her onto my face soap it got a million times better.
 
Yeah maybe, we'll see how things stand this weekend =D
I'm also just bummed about the calories and protein I'm missing out on, so here I am at 10pm making chicken breast, but with cocos milk and Thai red curry, bell peppers, beans and some leftover patatoes. :D
Should turn out okay I guess
 
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