You might be an alcoholic if..

[LadyForlorn]

You might be an alcoholic if you rejoice that you woke up in a lake of beer because at least it wasnt piss.
Or if you (probably) puke into the taxi, get charged 5 euros more because of that and decide to mace the poor cab driver instead of paying him.
You might also be an alcoholic if youre calculating in ml alcohol per euro as soon as you enter the store.

 

[belligerent drunk]

You might also be an alcoholic if youre calculating in ml alcohol per euro as soon as you enter the store.

Always do that, it's called efficiency

 

[ErgicMergic]

You might be an alcoholic if you get a DUI. Either that or a narcissistic, selfish asshole if you drink and get behind the wheel of a car.

Come at me, DUI recipient assholes. I stand behind my words.

 

[thelung]

Your name is Otis and Sheriff Andy has brought you some of Aunt Bea's pancakes.

 

[smokedup]

Cold beer, warm beer, stale beer, hot beer, frozen beer.. its all good!

 

[bomber]

Cold beer, warm beer, stale beer, hot beer, frozen beer.. its all good!

"cold beer, warm beer" fuck beer, that's not alcohol. Vodka, skotch... yeah.

 

[tremours]

Beer equal water, but it's a quick hangover cure

 

[reducexpand]

You might be an alcoholic if you constantly have to apologize for stuff people "claim" you did last night. Fuck em its all here say anyway

 

[RDP89]

You might be an alcoholic if you get a DUI. Either that or a narcissistic, selfish asshole if you drink and get behind the wheel of a car.

Come at me, DUI recipient assholes. I stand behind my words.

Well how then do you feel about people getting d.u.i.'s in one state for being just over .08 but in the next state over the same b.a.c. is being let off because the limit there is .1??

 

[SirTophamHat]

^^^ Fair question. I'm guessing he is referring to the standard limit that many US states have set, which is .08.

In Oregon you can get a DUII for having ANY alcohol on your breath if the cop is a dick, even .01. You can also get popped for driving under the influence of pot, too. I don't drive under any influence at all since I learned those rules. If I am forced to, I'll chill near my vehicle until I'm OK to go.

 

[RDP89]

In Oregon you can get a DUI for having ANY alcohol on your breath if the cop is a dick, even .01. You can also get popped for driving under the influence of pot, too. I don't drive under any influence at all since I learned those rules.

What?? I'll have to look up Oregon law, but how is that possible if you actually blow and it's that low they can still charge you?? that's fucked. And yeah, that's every state that you can techincally get a d.u.i. for bud which is kind of fucked but Usually hard to get/prove. Yeah, looking it up it seems Oregon has the same laws as most states now .08 and .04 if you have a cdl. Do you mean like if you refuse to blow> Because then, yes they can charge you if they say they smelled it on you, speech was slurred, etc., but it seems to me that if you blow under .08 in Oregon, you go on your merry way.

 

[SirTophamHat]

My roommate's colleague has a DUII (fixed) and he blew under .08. I also heard a commercial that said that you can get busted for any amount of alcohol on your breath in Oregon, so "don't risk it." (it was on a radio station).

TMK it is the cop's discretion. .08 is the hard law, and they can give you a DUII for under .08 if they feel like it.

I'm too tired/lazy to look up the specific law for right now, I'll trust to get back to this issue later.

edit: This is a hyperlink to an article about it. If you get hit with a penalty with alcohol < .08 they call it DUII (Driving Under the Influence of Intoxicants)

 

[Snafu in the Void]

You might be an alcoholic if you decide pissing in a jug and keeping it is better than walking to a bathroom to piss in a toilet

 

[Jabberwocky]

You might be an alcoholic if you decide pissing in a jug and keeping it is better than walking to a bathroom to piss in a toilet

Ha. Not just alcoholics. I think it’s a tweaker thing to. This is the most demeaning part of my debauched drug life. I get too paranoid to walk from my room to the bathroom more than once between midnight and 5 AM. So all that Gatorade I drink to stay hydrated ends up in plastic containers on my desk. It’s not to bad when it’s still dark, but looking at them when the sun comes up always makes me hate myself for what I do.

 

[deficiT]

Ha. Not just alcoholics. I think it’s a tweaker thing to. This is the most demeaning part of my debauched drug life. I get too paranoid to walk from my room to the bathroom more than once between midnight and 5 AM. So all that Gatorade I drink to stay hydrated ends up in plastic containers on my desk. It’s not to bad when it’s still dark, but looking at them when the sun comes up always makes me hate myself for what I do.

I can't bring myself to ever do it. Fuck pissin in jugs. Here's to the paranoia though making you do weird shit, happens to me all the time.

 

[seedee]

you might be an alcoholic if your anyhthing like me

 

[sdxyln]

You are an alcoholic if John Barleycorn is your master.

 

[Snafu in the Void]

You might be an alcoholic if you judge your self worth based on if you spent $6.90 or $9.65 on that fifth of cheap Canadian whiskey you're about to drink, knowing that one tastes significantly better and doesn't give you a horrible hangover yet that $2.75 difference might get you an extra McChicken from McDonalds the next day which might negate the hangover so you aren't really sure what to buy anymore and then the employee lady at the county liquor store starts saying "Sir? SIR, can I help you?".... true story....

 

[Jabberwocky]

You might be an alcoholic if your daily drinking is about 18 drinks a day but you like to kick it up a notch on weekends to a good 24 on Saturdays and Sundays.

 

[jhjhsdi]

might be an alco if go to a party with one bottle off gin and wake up in a mate's who wasn't at the party's garden only 2 hours later with a bike on top off you and three different bottles off whisky still completly full. and can't remeber a flippin thing.


pass out half in half out of own front door on weeknite till lunchtime next day when girlfriend finds you, alarms going since morning, half naked then has to drive you 5 hours late to work cause you can't find your keys.

-your sister had to help you off the floor in the bathroom because you fell sideways off the toilet..

You might be an alcoholic if you wake up in the woods behind a church covered in someone else's blood smelling like pussy.

..IF you vomit into a sock, in order to filter out the booze that your body could not process the first time, and drink that again because its your last stash.

...if you can only recall throwing up on a bus, wandering around the city and checking out a sex shop

...if you piss on the front doors of a church from the inside

You might be an alcoholic if you get blackout drunk and see yourself in the news the next day XD

You might be an alcoholic if you start drinking and wake up in your boxers on the beach when you were a 2 hour drive away from the ocean.

Or if you (probably) puke into the taxi, get charged 5 euros more because of that and decide to mace the poor cab driver instead of paying him.

EPIC i know alot of these are really old and possibly not on BL anymore but yeah... Salutations alkies, absolutely epic read this thread has been. Makes me wana get more booze