Trying to survive

Living dead girl

Living dead girl

Bluelighter
Joined
Apr 20, 2020
Messages
26
My first time blogging. Wanted to share my story. (Plse forgive my punctuation) I have been diagnosed with PTSD, clinical depression, anxiety, etc. Just about all of it. (Labels ugh....)
I have a loooong history of Trauma. And yes i self medicated. I don't want to say im in recovery, bc i still self medicate. Anyway idk what changed i cant pinpoint exactly what. If it was one particular thing or many but this last month ive been doing soooo much better. 😊 i can get out of bed!!!!! I actually feel motivated. And this is SO FOREIGN to me. I feel great🌈 i never cared wether i lived or died. I actually preferred death.
Now its like i see color again, a weight has been lifted and i look forward to the future😁
Anyway sorry for babbling, just wanted to share bc i dont actually tell those people in my life my truth. I hide it bc im afraid of bringing them down.
It feels good to be able to share and im thankful to bluelight for giving me a place to do so.😘❤💜🌈
 
So glad your feeling better . Being mindful of the little things always helped me ; enjoying the sun, good food, a nice hot shower . Good luck 👍🏻
 
Living dead girl said:
My first time blogging. Wanted to share my story. (Plse forgive my punctuation) I have been diagnosed with PTSD, clinical depression, anxiety, etc. Just about all of it. (Labels ugh....)
I have a loooong history of Trauma. And yes i self medicated. I don't want to say im in recovery, bc i still self medicate. Anyway idk what changed i cant pinpoint exactly what. If it was one particular thing or many but this last month ive been doing soooo much better. 😊 i can get out of bed!!!!! I actually feel motivated. And this is SO FOREIGN to me. I feel great🌈 i never cared wether i lived or died. I actually preferred death.
Now its like i see color again, a weight has been lifted and i look forward to the future😁
Anyway sorry for babbling, just wanted to share bc i dont actually tell those people in my life my truth. I hide it bc im afraid of bringing them down.
It feels good to be able to share and im thankful to bluelight for giving me a place to do so.😘❤💜🌈
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Sometimes all it takes is a little change in the breeze, I'm happy you're doing better :)
 
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