I am also a functional addict for the time being. I’ve been dysfunctional many times too however..
I regulate the amount of meth I smoke quite a bit. I buy semi quantity, enough to last 6-8 weeks and at my peak I consistently used .5g a day when I was recently more in dysfunction. Now that I’m working, having to be more discreet about my use, and also wanting to keep what I have gained and accomplished in recent months to have a fuckin life.. I’m using 2-3 points a day tops. The other day I smoked 4 hits all day, then a little more at night.
I like getting high but that’s a tall order unless I do a bunch or IV which I’m trying to avoid as much as I can. Mostly, although I get some buzz I’m just trying to function and get by.
I’m so hooked on amphetamines that I have a pretty marked withdrawal which takes the life right out of me and mentally I have a lot of trouble being clean even if I’ve cleaned up for awhile. I always go back, and I now always regulate it the best I can.
There’s no point in wasting my dope, my body, my time, or my life binging all the time. It happens but I’m really just using to get by. I want this to be over though, fast. I’ve just made a move into a better job and start in 2 weeks once my notice is up at the last one. I’m trying to wean down now.
I don’t know if I can but I have to keep trying to give this up. Even at the functional level, I fully expect it will eventually crumble to dysfunction and it will ruin my life if not kill me.