I can't really say I feel better, but today I thought to myself "if I was able to call a therapist and talk to her for almost one hour, why not try to call a friend?", so I wrote to my friend "hey, how about I call you in the evening?", he was like "woah, I didn't expect that coming from you. Sure". So we talked for 81 minutes. 81 minutes, lol. Sure, it was hard to talk, but it wasn't terrible really, I couldn't find words several times, but in general I was able to have a nice conversation with him. I also went for a walk with my mum and my dog in the evening, she says "stay here with the dog, I'll go buy something in the shop", so I say "I'll do it", she stares at me like "is this him?", haha. So when I was inside I felt anxious, but it wasn't as bad as if I was about to pass out. I bought three little times, I left and I thought to myself "I actually did it". Moreover, I was listening to some relaxing music today and I felt a tiny bit of enjoyment during it. I really don't feel an improvement, but what I did, I did despite of feeling really bad and it turns out I can occasionally go to buy something or make a phone call. Sure, when I make a phone call to my doctor for example, my heart is beating really fast, but when I called my friend, it wasn't really so bad.