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Is my father a racist? My white dad made me lose my Native American boyfriend.

Extremely racist. Your mother should've realized she was married to a racist all along when he had the nerve to speak out about your Native American ex.

I would never let my family drive me apart from someone I really loved. Now if he turned out to be violent towards others, that's not a good sign, at the same time I can't blame him for his feelings about the white man. Yes, Columbus did steal, kill and rape for this land, but every year, he's touted as some kind of hero...as if the pilgrims and Native Americans were actually sitting across breaking bread at Thanksgiving. Maybe they were before Columbus and his fellow cunts slaughtered them.

Where was I? Oh, so just because your dad said "I'm not racist. I married your Puerto Rican mother.", that means nothing at all.

Many racists sleep with other races they are harboring hatred for.
Just look at how the white man raped black women repeatedly during slave days. Sickening.

Your ex wasn't violent towards you and I don't think he would've been. He saw you as one of his own.

Zonxx said:
maybe your father is like mine, we're both white, he claims not to be racist..... and earlier at dinner in a restaurant, reffering to my coke plug he asked me without a single damn care aloud " so you see the n**ger lately?" and as you can imagine how embaressing that was... atleast yours is alittle more discreet about it...............
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Your dad is a racist too, a blatant one.
 
Btw, you are not to blame for your ex ending up in jail. My ex went to jail for life basically after we broke up. I felt slight guilt about that when I found out. I figured he just gave up and said fuck it after I left. Then I stopped all guilty feelings when I reminded myself that every one is responsible for their actions. That part was not your fault.
 
Marla1976 said:
I guess my father is racist/prejudice without realizing it. I guess he is racist and, at the very least, prejudice. I love him and I know he loves me; he's been good to me. He will always mention race when describing a story or someone he met, but especially when there are negative connotations. It's subtle (most of the time), but he takes extra caution around black people. But on the other hand he married my mother a Puerto Rican woman. Also he really gets along with my mother's whole family.
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Extra caution around black people? Haha He should take extra caution around white people too since they are infamous for mass murder.

I never judge an entire race based off of certain people's actions. Ignorant.
 
Sounds like your bf was as racist as your dad.
He hated white people and was violent to white people so fuck him, ur dad was prob right about him.
Let him find a nice Cherokee girl
 
Soso78 said:
Sounds like your bf was as racist as your dad.
He hated white people and was violent to white people so fuck him, ur dad was prob right about him.
Let him find a nice Cherokee girl
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About 3 years ago i have got in touch with him. We had a conversation on FB. He lives on Leech Lake Indian Reservation, Minnesota. He is married with Native American woman. They have 4 kids, 3 boys,1 girl. He seemed happy.
 
He sounds like a thug, and it sounds like you father recognized that.

Maybe your dad is not a racist, but an excellent judge of character. That fits better with the facts - he married a Puerto Rican at a time when it was probably still quite taboo to do so - but he did it anyway.

Your ex as you describe him was a bitter angry man. Raised in a troubled family. Regularly resorted to violence to resolve conflicts. Robs peoples houses...

Don't you think its natural for a father to want more for his daughter than that? He would worry that you would end up being on the receiving end of his temper, experience his poverty, be stuck in a similarly dysfunctional family life than what your ex grew up with since dysfunctional is all he knows.

Also, the fact that your mum was concerned that he might be trying charm you so he could mooch.. doesnt that help validate your dads concerns? Or would you first thought be she must be racist too. If so, you need to think about that.

Have you considered that maybe you have something of a fixation on race yourself?
 
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You sound like a racist justifying another racist. If you actually read more into OP's life, you would see that her marriage to a white man isn't exactly perfect. I don't hear about her father disputing this man she's married to now and that's only because he is white.
 
Well, I'm not.

I'd certainly prefer not to sound that way to you, since it get in the way of establishing a productive dialogue.

Can you tell me why it sounds that way? PM me if you like.

Its just so clear to me that a father might have reasons beyond race for his attitude. She did say he was regularly violent, a burgler, not from a 'good' family; and poor.
 
morpher001 said:
Well, I'm not.

I'd certainly prefer not to sound that way to you, since it get in the way of establishing a productive dialogue.

Can you tell me why it sounds that way? PM me if you like.

Its just so clear to me that a father might have reasons beyond race for his attitude. She did say he was regularly violent, a burgler, not from a 'good' family; and poor.
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I'm used to how racists try to make excuses for themselves. One poster in this thread said his father claimed not to be a racist, but said "nigger" in the next breath aloud in a restaurant at that! It's just amazing to me how people can claim not to be racist when they clearly are. If that is not the case with you, I apologize.

Marla stated that her father was only against her ex who is Native American and did not judge any white men she has been with. Her current white husband is very demeaning and emotionally abusive to her. I saw what you said to her in the other thread and couldn't disagree with you more. I thought that was pretty harsh and unfair. She does not deserve to be mistreated by her husband and spoken down to over and over again, especially in front of their daughter. She made a mistake in the past, but she doesn't need to be punished still. Her husband better forgive her and move on or risk losing her. I know I wouldn't put up with his behavior. Why isn't her father speaking out now about how she is being mistreated? To me it's clear that the disapproval of her ex was racially motivated.
 
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CoastTwoCoast said:
I'm used to how racists try to make excuses for themselves. One poster in this thread said his father claimed not to be a racist, but said "nigger" in the next breath aloud in a restaurant at that! It's just amazing to me how people can claim not to be racist when they clearly are. If that is not the case with you, I apologize.

Marla stated that her father was only against her ex who is Native American and did not judge any white men she has been with. Her current white husband is very demeaning and emotionally abusive to her. I saw what you said to her in the other thread and couldn't disagree with you more. I thought that was pretty harsh and unfair. She does not deserve to be mistreated by her husband and spoken down to over and over again, especially in front of their daughter. She made a mistake in the past, but she doesn't need to be punished still. Her husband better forgive her and move on or risk losing her. I know I wouldn't put up with his behavior. Why isn't her father speaking out now about how she is being mistreated? To me it's clear that the disapproval of her ex was racially motivated.
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I dont take a position of default hatred or dislike toward any individuals purely based on their membership of an ethnic group. That would be racist.

Some people take the position that a racist is anyone points out that Egyptians and Norwegians are identifiable different. To acknowledge the strengths of one group is seen as a denigration of the other group. Not sure if that you.

I don't see how it is relevant that he did not show a similar distaste for other men she introduced. Unless those men also happened to be violent thieves why should be judge them the in the same way? Isn't it racist to tar them with the same brush rather than assess individually?

As to Marla. I think she is very good at knowing how to engage the sympathies of some and leverage certain assumptions among others. I think shes pushed your buttons too. At least consider that I might me right about that.

Then consider that everyone in her life, including the most sympathetic types i.e. who work in the caring professions, through to her peers at the NA meetings, to the usually vapid and chatty hairdresser, and her miserable unloved husband. They all say the same thing to her about the way she conducts herself and the attitude she presents. Maybe she is the arsehole - everyone says so. Maybe she is a habitually overdressed and obnoxiously provocative tart - everyone says so.
 
morpher001 said:
I dont take a position of default hatred or dislike toward any individuals purely based on their membership of an ethnic group. That would be racist.

Some people take the position that a racist is anyone points out that Egyptians and Norwegians are identifiable different. To acknowledge the strengths of one group is seen as a denigration of the other group. Not sure if that you.

I don't see how it is relevant that he did not show a similar distaste for other men she introduced. Unless those men also happened to be violent thieves why should be judge them the in the same way? Isn't it racist to tar them with the same brush rather than assess individually?

As to Marla. I think she is very good at knowing how to engage the sympathies of some and leverage certain assumptions among others. I think shes pushed your buttons too. At least consider that I might me right about that.

Then consider that everyone in her life, including the most sympathetic types i.e. who work in the caring professions, through to her peers at the NA meetings, to the usually vapid and chatty hairdresser, and her miserable unloved husband. They all say the same thing to her about the way she conducts herself and the attitude she presents. Maybe she is the arsehole - everyone says so. Maybe she is a habitually overdressed and obnoxiously provocative tart - everyone says so.
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You seem very adamant about blindly disagreeing with her and trying to tear down her character. You're jumping to a lot of conclusions just to be mean. I don't understand your need to do that. You also conveniently keep ignoring my question: If her dad did not disapprove of her ex solely because of his race, why is he not speaking out about his daughter's obvious emotional abuse in her marriage to a white man? Huh? She's not being treated right in her marriage and he hasn't said anything. It wasn't about him trying to protect her at all. You're really the one coming off as an arsehole, not her.
 
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CoastTwoCoast said:
You seem very adamant about blindly disagreeing with her and trying to tear down her character. You're jumping to a lot of conclusions just to be mean. I don't understand your need to do that. You also conveniently keep ignoring my question: If her dad did not disapprove of her ex solely because of his race, why is he not speaking out about his daughter's obvious emotional abuse in her marriage to a white man? Huh? She's not being treated right in her marriage and he hasn't said anything. It wasn't about him trying to protect her at all. You're really the one coming off as an arsehole, not her.
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If anything, it sounds like your a racist who has a grudge against white males. The father might've been racist, but it was passive racism. OP's boyfriend by her own admission hated all white people and assaulted them because of that, textbook definition of racism.
As for your ironic comment generalizing white men as mass shooters while accusing someone else of racism, I would advise that you look into FBI crime statistics. The overwhelming majority of homicides in america are committed by blacks. Not racism but an objective truth.
 
mp44god said:
If anything, it sounds like your a racist who has a grudge against white males. The father might've been racist, but it was passive racism. OP's boyfriend by her own admission hated all white people and assaulted them because of that, textbook definition of racism.
As for your ironic comment generalizing white men as mass shooters while accusing someone else of racism, I would advise that you look into FBI crime statistics. The overwhelming majority of homicides in america are committed by blacks. Not racism but an objective truth.
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Whatever you say buddy. My point was while her father is being so cautious around black people, he should be just as cautious around white people. They're doing the mass shootings. What's more of your "objective truths"? I have a feeling those are racist too.

I date white men and I hold no grudge at all. I judge people based on their character individually.
 
CoastTwoCoast said:
Whatever you say buddy. My point was while her father is being so cautious around black people, he should be just as cautious around white people. They're doing the mass shootings. What's more of your "objective truths"? I have a feeling those are racist too.

I date white men and I hold no grudge at all. I judge people based on their character individually.
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Like I said, "white people doing all the mass shootings" is factually incorrect. The fact that random spree killings are mostly committed by whites (despite the black on black ones that occur in Chicago every weekend) is irrelevant when the majority of the country's homicides are committed by a non white group that is a sliver of the population as a whole. I understand your emotional, but you repeatedly calling me a racist doesn't in any way refute my claims. You've also exposed your own racism against whites multiple times in this thread so you claiming the moral high ground is fucking hilarious.
 
They’re doing the mass shootings? 🤣
Mass shooting committed by whites so should be cautious around all whites?
Your racist yourself then c2c
 
mp44god said:
Like I said, "white people doing all the mass shootings" is factually incorrect. The fact that random spree killings are mostly committed by whites (despite the black on black ones that occur in Chicago every weekend) is irrelevant when the majority of the country's homicides are committed by a non white group that is a sliver of the population as a whole. I understand your emotional, but you repeatedly calling me a racist doesn't in any way refute my claims. You've also exposed your own racism against whites multiple times in this thread so you claiming the moral high ground is fucking hilarious.
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I haven't exposed any racism of my own. I'm just not denying facts of what white people have done in the past. So I guess that makes me racist in your eyes. You're silly.
 
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