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N&SADD Social V1 - One step forwards, 2 steps back

steewith2ees

steewith2ees

Bluelight Crew
Joined
Nov 9, 2013
Messages
5,676
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the piss artist formerly known as stevesircull (th
I am sure that there are dead social threads buried in the archives somewhere but this is a new dawn etc and I cannot be bothered to revive them.

So best restarting here. Far too many regional heroin threads. As a community as a whole, regular posters within this forum surely cannot spend 24 hours a day shooting dope?

So how are we all filling our time in the interim?

It's 3.19 GMT - I cannot sleep - I've had 4mg of clonazepam over the past 9 hours and cannot see the point in attempting to take any more so I'm here, on here, listening to this...

11197125.jpg
 
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I'm sober as well.

It can get boring, I admit. But I like to point my eyes to the ppl I know who've never gotten into any Substance abuse, and observe them. They dont seem Bored so it must be Just Me.

How do I spend my time?

I read alot. Just finished an anthology of short stories by the late and beautiful Truman Capote I HIGHLY recommend him to anyone / everyone.

I write. (Though that's a touchy subject as I've been in a slump as far as my current project which is a novel and I will pitch a fit if anyone asks how THAT has been going.)

I have pets. (3 male housecats) they love me and I love them.

I spend a decent amount of time with my family. I have five grown children , three siblings and lots of nieces n nephews. We get together and do things like ** TALKING**, watching movies playing games & just generally entertaining all the various pets n children in the family. Food as well is always a large part of our get togethers. We like to grill in the summertime. I bake a lot in the wintertime.

The men in my family hunt so a few times a year we process the wild game. We process & store foods from gardening as well.

Nostalgia & Tradition play large roles in the lives of myself n my family members .

Yes its a Quiet life.
I like it that way.
 
I didn't know they had a rep for temperance. I'd have to be half cut to do that shit.

But saying that I've been half cut throughout most of my working life, which is why I now live in professional disgrace with my drug habits and age making me less and less employable as every day passes.
 
Quiet can be very nice. I actually missed it when I was using. Not so much anymore lol.

I was far more than half cut working, I was 9 times spun. Now I'm boring and philosophical
 
Much better lol. Was meth induced combined with some other issues. Getting clean killed the psychosis and is helping deal with the others. I'm better than I've ever been
 
bptubbs said:
Much better lol. Was meth induced combined with some other issues. Getting clean killed the psychosis and is helping deal with the others. I'm better than I've ever been
Click to expand...

After 25 years keeping ahead of the crash, my ex gf is in the process of spinning out from constant amphetamine use (the majority of our street 'speed' is amphetamine sulphate powder as opposed to meth but abuse it for long enough and you end up in the same place). Have had to put up with earache from her for years for poisoning myself with heroin and benzodiazepines but, as physically crippled as I now am from it at least I still have the insight into what I have done to myself. Watching the psychotic symptoms creeping up on her while she remains in denial is heartbreaking but who am I to listen to - I was always the stupid fuck with a needle while she only ever swallyed 'harmless' pills & powders.
 
I'm so sorry to hear of your ex gf's plight. And tubbs, your losses as well. It's awful to feel so powerless n lose them, finally.

I am sober , as in i do not recall my last use of the medication (vicodin ) that i was addicted to. Sometime this past year I took some for a medical reason. April or May? I didn't mis-use the prescription. However I felt very irritable and angry while taking it. I have to assume the stuff "turned" on me, and doesn't serve to make me feel Good anymore.

My Active Addiction or the years I was taking too many/ seeking them out was between 2009- 2012.
I did not begin by trying to get high or any of this-- they were prescribed for medical conditions. After the conditions were cured I found I was unable to Just Stop.
 
bptubbs said:
Yeah it really is sad to watch, I lost a good friend to a psychotic episode, rest his soul, lost one to heroin too.
Click to expand...

Did you ever have the misfortune of reading this? Food for thought for all......


The Daily Dot: At Bluelight, an online shrine to the drug forum’s dead

Runningfox said:
I'm so sorry to hear of your ex gf's plight. And tubbs, your losses as well. It's awful to feel so powerless n lose them, finally.

I am sober , as in i do not recall my last use of the medication (vicodin ) that i was addicted to. Sometime this past year I took some for a medical reason. April or May? I didn't mis-use the prescription. However I felt very irritable and angry while taking it. I have to assume the stuff "turned" on me, and doesn't serve to make me feel Good anymore.

My Active Addiction or the years I was taking too many/ seeking them out was between 2009- 2012.
I did not begin by trying to get high or any of this-- they were prescribed for medical conditions. After the conditions were cured I found I was unable to Just Stop.
Click to expand...

April / May? For whatever reason you slipped up that is still awesome!
 
I've read the Shrine.
When I first joined BL.
It's very sad. Yet its lovely how ppl from all over the world know and care for one another thru this community.
May all those honored in the Shrine rest in love and peace.
 
Runningfox said:
I've read the Shrine.
When I first joined BL.
It's very sad. Yet its lovely how ppl from all over the world know and care for one another thru this community.
May all those honored in the Shrine rest in love and peace.
Click to expand...

Did you read the article I linked to? Its from an independent online publication about the shrine... in 2008.

A few more names in there since unfortunately.
 
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