you don't have to 'enjoy' a substance to be taking it recreationally, but i see your point.
that is a contradiciton in terms :D
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Thinking aobut it in my past 'episides' it wasnt the actual stim which caused the breakdown but always not being able to sleep after, and then i wouldnt sleep for several nights after that for fear of when id finally sleep. I only took modest doses each time so it wouldnt have been the stim stopping me sleep just my extreme paranoia.
I had benzoes a few times but threw them away since i didnt trust them and was scared of it becoming a slippery slope to getting hooked if they worked.
I tried weed last time which was a terrible idea. Just exaserbated the situation.
But kratom i think would be great as long as it didnt cause anxiety at the start. Ive been getting better at avoiding that recently, still a work in progress tho. but i think even if i missed one nights sleep if i took it the next day then most of the stim would have cleared out by then meaning there wouldnt be much or any interaction.
Like i said the good thing wiht kratom is i feel safe with that. Ive had it quite a few times now so know what to expect and am not as afraid of getting addicted to it like other substances cos its not the worst, so people say, tho ofc i am trying to avoid it. Ive found if i take more than 3.5 grams i get a hangover the next day so i dont like any more anyhow.
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