Is death by oral opoids really rare with recreational doses or is he just saying that to shut me up?
If he's only taking opiates, with no other drugs, and in
carefully measured doses, while aware of where his tolerance is at and what he can handle, it would be pretty hard to die (
but still not impossible. There's no guaranteed protection from OD or other death if you're using strong opiates recreationally) If he's just popping pills whenever he feels like it, it's still less likely as long as he's only taking opiates, but it's absolutely possible that he could OD, or die through passing out in the wrong position, vomiting while passed out, etc.
Tbh the oral thing has nothing to do with it, oral use isn't any less likely to kill him than snorting or smoking (assuming he has the proper formulation for those ROA's), it doesn't provide some magical protection from excessive nervous system depression. In fact arguably it's more dangerous than snorting and smoking if you aren't taking a regular, medically supervised dose, since when using those other routes, the drug kicks in faster, providing a much faster feedback on whether you're at the level you want to be, allowing you to choose whether to take more or not and the exact amount to take. When eating pills, metabolic variations can mean the pills can take longer than normal to kick in, or have a delayed effect, leading to the user taking more and more, then it piles up in their system and bam, out they go.
Even injecting, it can be pretty rare to OD if you use nothing but opiates, carefully measure your doses (ie, are using pure products, not street heroin), know your tolerance and take every reasonable precaution.
I'm not suggesting he starts snorting or injecting his pills, or tries to smoke them, just pointing out that it has far less to do with how he's taking the opiates than it does with how carefully he's taking them. And it sounds like he's not taking them very carefully because he's deluded himself into thinking that as long as he only takes them orally, he's invincible.
And that's not even touching on the benzo issue. as soon as you throw even a low dose of benzos into the situation, All that shit goes out the window and it's up in the air. The combination of two CNS depressants significantly increases the chance of death over taking either one by itself, it's a 1 + 1 = 3 situation. Even if he's being careful, one small mistake, an extra pill or two at the wrong time, could kill him. If he isn't being careful and is popping both of them like candy, then it's pretty likely that it's just a matter of time.
eg. One of the biggest killers of opiate users is oral methadone + oral benzos, and this is in users who have a high tolerance to methadone (and usually benzos), which it sounds like your friend doesn't. Your friend can easily research this for hard evidence that oral use provides no protection, especially when combining opiates with benzos. The idea that you can only OD with certain routes of administration is ludicrous.