I have been saving up my valium because I wanted off it by reducing my 15mg per day to 20mg once twice a week. However I'm going through hell at the moment. Rumours getting spread about me sick ones! I also smoke weed everyday and its like a medication to me. Quality wise been getting soft black does anyone know how to roll that stuff. Anyway last night I decided to buy a bottle of wine which I have been abusing my saved up tablets taking them like sweeties past few days so I phoned up helplines on bullying but they couldn't have cared less. Took 15mg with wine on top of what id taken before bad idea ended up with paramedics taken me to hospital got homecat 6 am. l also had a couple of lines of ethylphenidate I dont particularly like it but it makes me wank all day lol. I get aggressive the valium as well really evil thoughts and I say evil things. I suffer from OCD and the higher doses of diazepam work better at helping the OCD. I've started taking my Fluoxetine again my cupboards full of them. Then that shit Quetiapine. Asked to get that stopped and asked for a weeks worth of sleepers. What did I get? fkn zopiclone, rather of had zolpidem knocks me out in seconds. Trouble is my friend is hell bent on getting me off the vallies. My doc has reduced me to 14 5mg tabsca week then 1 5mg for another week then stop. They give me rage at tines but I haven't bothered with anything past few days in my dosage Could I fight to keep them and the maximum doasgecif diazepam is 60mg per day so if its helping me I don't see the problem. But I know th withdrawals wilk be hell but fuck it.
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need advice please
- Thread starter jungo87
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curious_24
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I think I missed the question.
Sammy G
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Nice to see you're still alive, jungo. Though very much in spite of your best efforts, it would appear. 
THECATINTHEHAT
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Post of the week imo.
For my part I'm beginning my detox today too, just go cold turkey from the fuckers if you're going to use all those other meds for the wd. 15mg a day when you have done some form of tapering although in a bizzare and silly manner shouldn't be too bad if you have quitiapine for sleep (although it does lower the seizure threshold, so use at your own risk. Zolpidem and a tony 25mg a night and you'll be sleeping a goodun. Get some sort promethazine from your doc for the day time if you can.
For my part I'm beginning my detox today too, just go cold turkey from the fuckers if you're going to use all those other meds for the wd. 15mg a day when you have done some form of tapering although in a bizzare and silly manner shouldn't be too bad if you have quitiapine for sleep (although it does lower the seizure threshold, so use at your own risk. Zolpidem and a tony 25mg a night and you'll be sleeping a goodun. Get some sort promethazine from your doc for the day time if you can.
Hard to tell which pills you actually want to keep out of that little lot you're currently taking but they all do the same thing so pick a favourite and fight for that one. You'll almost certainly not be allowed to keep any of the actual benzos, zolpidem is less strictly scripted (although fuck knows why given it's waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay messier than any of the benzos and has at least as bad w/d 8)). You won't be able to stay on all those together if they're actually scripted... I kinda doubt they're all scripted though. Z-drugs are your best bet but expect to be tapered and cut off from all.
That's a lie cos have seen you post here before - and recently at that. Nice to see you here again anyway. If memory is as bad as it seems perhaps take similar advice to above lest you end up posting this thread next week 
May I ask why ?
Well its basically the diazepam I def want to keep. I was scripted 15mg a day for over a year. My friend phoned the doctor and told him I wanted off them, hes been wanting me off them but now I've told the doc I'm stopping hes prescribed 10mg for a week then 5mg for a week and stop. I stopped taking them and saved them up taking then twice a week to try a taper. But past few days its been from 40mg then 20mg later. Done this few days now. 130mg was most I've taken. I would also like to get scripted zopiclone because I sometimes get insomnia. All my drugs are legit but I'm going to go through hell when my stash runs out. Only next best thing is buy some etiz.
If you're saving script to binge you are neither tapering nor dependant. You have no chance of being allowed a script cos you are blatantly abusing them recreationally and in no way addicted. Stick to black market or grey market benzos and stop taking the piss - it's this shit which stops people being given legit scripts. You are not physically dependant or you would not be able to use the way you are. If you really want to find out what physical dependence feels like then go with grey market benzos like etiz then try getting a script once you're in too deep. Currently you are precisely the reason people cannot get legit benzo scripts.
Apologies for being blunt but what do you expect?
Apologies for being blunt but what do you expect?
I've been going through fucking hell these past few months mate so don't talk shit you know nothing about. Your pissed because you can't get a vallie script just like all docrmtor shoppers junkies. I have never taken my script incorrectly I took MY prescribed dosage BUT I wanted to taper myself gradually but yeah still get scripted vallies? you jealous you can't get them? Well what does that tell you your just another drug seeker wasting doctors and may I add taxpayers money. AND I am physically dependant on them. Are you a fucking doctor. You fucking look after your own pathetic life thank you. I will get my script back as well son as if not I'll sue the fucking doctor!
I had a legit diaz script for over 20 years until it was stopped due to pisstakers taking the piss so have good reason to be pissed off with people like yourself who are taking the piss. I took my script as prescribed - as required - not saved up for binging. If you can save your 15mg daily up long enough to pissing about you are neither dependent nor even especially needy. You are abusing it. This is a fact. If you can't even see that you have bigger issues. Either way, undeserved and no reason to be prescribed. I repeat, you and yours are the problem. Stop taking the piss. Feel free to sue your doctor - and do please keep us all updated on how that goes
Rybee
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Yeah well maybe I did bend the truth there a little! But I only post in OD and BDC really... sometimes Mental Health.That's a lie cos have seen you post here before - and recently at that. Nice to see you here again anyway. If memory is as bad as it seems perhaps take similar advice to above lest you end up posting this thread next week
Why I don't venture in here much? Or why I'm speechless?
To be honest with you, 15mg per day for over a year to 10mg in week 1, then 5mg in week 2 is quite a rapid taper. If you've been on it for a year, why did you taper so quickly? I'm getting mixed messages from your posts... Why does your friend what you off of it?
Did you ask to have Zolpidem over Zopiclone by the way? If so, what was the reason for being denied Zolpidem in favour of Zopiclone? For what it counts, I think Temazepam is a better hypnotic, though it's very subjective. Zopiclone makes your mouth taste of cats piss in the morning too.
I agree with these points.
Hey come on, calm down mate. I know there's a joke in there somewhere at the irony of telling you to take a chill pill... He's just being honest and I kind of agree with him.
I agree with this post wholeheartedly.I had a legit diaz script for over 20 years until it was stopped due to pisstakers taking the piss so have good reason to be pissed off with people like yourself who are taking the piss. I took my script as prescribed - as required - not saved up for binging. If you can save your 15mg daily up long enough to pissing about you are neither dependent nor even especially needy. You are abusing it. This is a fact. If you can't even see that you have bigger issues. Either way, undeserved and no reason to be prescribed. I repeat, you and yours are the problem. Stop taking the piss. Feel free to sue your doctor - and do please keep us all updated on how that goes
I really don't mean to be offensive, but I'm not sure what the purpose of your thread is? Are you wanting to ask something or just having a bit of a rant? I don't mind the latter... It's sometimes fine to let some steam off. I'm just trying to see whether I can help you with anything?
Presumably for the exact same reason I had to do the same only with a higher dosage and after 20-odd years: cos people take the piss and use desire as excuse to claim dependence where there is none. Peter & the "benzo-addicted" wolf.
Rybee
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I assume you're of the opinion that it was the doctor's suggestion to taper like that? I couldn't make out whether the doctor wanted OP to taper off like that, or whether OP wanted himself to taper off like that?
If it's the doctor who's put that plan in to practice to get him off quickly, then yeah I can see why they'd do it so quickly. Just if it was me coming off of them after a year, I'd want a longer period to taper.
This whole thread is a little bit confusing... I'm not sure if OP is asking for help, advice, just ranting, or a mixture of the three.
By the way coming off of 20+ years of regular diazepam use must have been hard. I've only been prescribed it, and other derivatives for the last 4 years since I was 20 for pro re nata use. Some months I can cope fine without, some months I'd struggle like mad at the thought of being denied any. I'd hate to be denied it after so long. I really sympathise with you, I hope you can cope okay without it... Must be hard. I know I'd struggle *hugs*
GPs are under intense pressure to cut all benzo scripts ASAP. My GP is actually very pro-benzo - if you google him he has articles in medical journals saying he believes they should be OTC - but even lenient docs can only hold out so long and the tapers are rapid when they hit. Benzo scripts have always been controversial - especially longterm ones - but was never a problem like it is now for those that can demonstrate "proper" use. It's cos so many people took so much piss that it became an untenable position and we all had to suffer cos a few people couldn't be fukked to pay 10p per pill rather than rip the piss out of the NHS to get their jollies.
I can get by without my script, I am worse off without it. I never did take the piss (okay, not past the first couple years anyway - that was a very long time ago and learnt my lessons the hard way). Benzos work for me like no other drug does. Only when taken "properly" though. I could go for grey market benzos but I abuse them like I hadn't in well over a decade when prescribed. It's a very different subjective feeling having a script and buying as you please. Former implies responsibility. If only it did to all and we wouldn't be in this position![:\](https://bluelight.org/xf/BL_Images/Orig_Emoji/wrygrin.gif "wry grin :\")
I can get by without my script, I am worse off without it. I never did take the piss (okay, not past the first couple years anyway - that was a very long time ago and learnt my lessons the hard way). Benzos work for me like no other drug does. Only when taken "properly" though. I could go for grey market benzos but I abuse them like I hadn't in well over a decade when prescribed. It's a very different subjective feeling having a script and buying as you please. Former implies responsibility. If only it did to all and we wouldn't be in this position
Rybee
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Yeah I agree with you re: GP's, I've had problems with a lot of them in the past when I've moved to different GP practices about the country.
The first time I was prescribed Diazepam was by my doctor when I was at Uni, I just said I'd been struggling with restlessness/sleeplessness/anxiety for a long time and finally caved into to admitting I needed help (I'd lost my mother to cancer ~2 years before this and it hit me hard, it was the source of a lot of my anxiety). I knew absolutely nothing about pharmaceutical drugs... He prescribed me 28x5mg tabs and told me to take one whenever I felt anxious. As a first time user I naturally found them to be really effective. I had no idea it was Valium... the packet said Diazepam which meant nothing to me. Needless to say I went through the 28 tabs in a week... as I literally took one whenever I felt anxious... as he said to do, I knew nothing about them, nothing about their potential for abuse or addiction, it was just a chemical name on a packet I knew nothing about.
After that week I moved back home for the end of term and went to my home doctor saying I needed some more Diazepam (showing her the packet so she knew what it was) and to my amazement was quizzed and questioned like I'd been taken into custody. I was told that I was craving them and was abusing them and addicted to them, which frightened the life out of me... Needless to say I had 'Valium Addict - Seeking Benzodiazepines to Abuse' written into my patient notes, (this was ~4 years ago) and to this day, every time I go into the docs it says:
*NO DIAZEPAM - PREVIOUS VALIUM ADDICT*
on the homepage of my patient notes screen. At first this angered me and I asked for it to be removed, but now I just laugh. It's quite pathetic.
Fortunately I have private health insurance and see a private Psych for my depression & anxiety as an outpatient at The Priory. I have a great relationship with my Psych and am prescribed 5mg t.d.s Diazepam p.r.n. As you say, he's pro-benzodiazepine use. I was put on Venlafaxine (Effexor) by a previous Psych for my anxiety and it literally ruined my life. Numb to the world with no emotion. I couldn't function in day-to-day life because of it. I now use Diazepam every now and then to help with my anxiety and my life is brilliant. I can function like a normal human being. He monitors my use and all is fine. At the end of the day it's a legitimate medication for a legitimate problem.
May I ask why you're forbidden to take Diazepam now, seeing as your GP is pro-benzo use? Or was this a different doctor that took you off of it.
I do see their predicament and the pressure that they're under, they must have so many people in their daily trying to fake some kind of anxiety or insomnia issue in order to be 'score' a prescription. It's the people like OP that have tarred my medical records forever now. If for whatever reason my Psych can't manage me as a patient I honestly do fear for my future... I can't envisage leading a normal life without access to Diazepam or similar derivatives.
Sorry to derail your thread OP... Just wanted to acknowledge Shambles' post.
As per my previous post OP, is there anything I can actually help you with?
The first time I was prescribed Diazepam was by my doctor when I was at Uni, I just said I'd been struggling with restlessness/sleeplessness/anxiety for a long time and finally caved into to admitting I needed help (I'd lost my mother to cancer ~2 years before this and it hit me hard, it was the source of a lot of my anxiety). I knew absolutely nothing about pharmaceutical drugs... He prescribed me 28x5mg tabs and told me to take one whenever I felt anxious. As a first time user I naturally found them to be really effective. I had no idea it was Valium... the packet said Diazepam which meant nothing to me. Needless to say I went through the 28 tabs in a week... as I literally took one whenever I felt anxious... as he said to do, I knew nothing about them, nothing about their potential for abuse or addiction, it was just a chemical name on a packet I knew nothing about.
After that week I moved back home for the end of term and went to my home doctor saying I needed some more Diazepam (showing her the packet so she knew what it was) and to my amazement was quizzed and questioned like I'd been taken into custody. I was told that I was craving them and was abusing them and addicted to them, which frightened the life out of me... Needless to say I had 'Valium Addict - Seeking Benzodiazepines to Abuse' written into my patient notes, (this was ~4 years ago) and to this day, every time I go into the docs it says:
*NO DIAZEPAM - PREVIOUS VALIUM ADDICT*
on the homepage of my patient notes screen. At first this angered me and I asked for it to be removed, but now I just laugh. It's quite pathetic.
Fortunately I have private health insurance and see a private Psych for my depression & anxiety as an outpatient at The Priory. I have a great relationship with my Psych and am prescribed 5mg t.d.s Diazepam p.r.n. As you say, he's pro-benzodiazepine use. I was put on Venlafaxine (Effexor) by a previous Psych for my anxiety and it literally ruined my life. Numb to the world with no emotion. I couldn't function in day-to-day life because of it. I now use Diazepam every now and then to help with my anxiety and my life is brilliant. I can function like a normal human being. He monitors my use and all is fine. At the end of the day it's a legitimate medication for a legitimate problem.
May I ask why you're forbidden to take Diazepam now, seeing as your GP is pro-benzo use? Or was this a different doctor that took you off of it.
I do see their predicament and the pressure that they're under, they must have so many people in their daily trying to fake some kind of anxiety or insomnia issue in order to be 'score' a prescription. It's the people like OP that have tarred my medical records forever now. If for whatever reason my Psych can't manage me as a patient I honestly do fear for my future... I can't envisage leading a normal life without access to Diazepam or similar derivatives.
Sorry to derail your thread OP... Just wanted to acknowledge Shambles' post.
As per my previous post OP, is there anything I can actually help you with?
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