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The Up-the-Rear End Thread UNCUT! - Approach with caution

Eveleivibe

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Hiya all,

As a lot of us lately are having what can be called a pain-in-arse or a shitty time I thought I'd create a thread for a nice-in-depth discussion of our "rear ends" without upsetting others who may not wish to hear/read this particular talk.

So if you're constipated, suffering diarear, had things stick Up there at hospital or whatever bring it here.

So if you're read this n don't approve well you were warmed before entering the thread.

Also plugging can be discussed here as voted by a few EADDers :)

Lets see how long it is before this thread get closed - so er try to keep it clean i.e. No drama so we don't annoy the mods.

Evey

OK - Who's going first?
 
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When I was 8 yo I was really constipated and a 50+ doctor stuck his hand up my arse, while my mum stood there and watched. He prescribed me some really potent laxatives, which made me shit everywhere, bed etc.
One of my finest shit moments was when I shit myself, and hid the evidence behind me draws. Couple of years later my mum got some new draws. The delivery men took the old draws out my room and put the new ones in. Just as they were about to leave they knocked on my front door and handed over my old shit covered toy story boxers I forgot about.
 
Hahaha no seriously though there are certain subjects that people don't want to read about - but that people need to discuss. Rear end probs is one of those n as it's a drugs discussion site, well certain drugs ie suboxone, cause these issues.

Also if people wish to discuss plugging then, as long as that's ok with the mods, theres no reason why not discuss it here too. As it is to do with the rear end. It also gives people a chuckle, which is good as it's not good to be serious all the time. Sometimes it's good to laugh at life, to make a joke at our problems n make things seem lighter - if just for a short while.

This thread isn't about 'poo' but you can discuss that it's about any problems with the rear end lol so not to inflict others with this sort of discussion, who do not particularly want to take part in.

Good day to all :)

Evey xxxx

PS : someone give me a lesson in grammar. It's gone to shit!
 
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Just back from the hospital to discuss my arse-related woes actually. Thankfully didn't have anything stuck up there this time though. The industrial strength steroids I've been on the last couple of weeks are working great actually and I've had the least pain and best pouch function since my last surgery in October. Sadly they're a bit of a temporary solution, due to the error in the creation of my pouch by my surgeon it's likely that when I stop the steroids the colitis will just come straight back. So I have an appointment in 8 weeks to decide whether I want to try what's called a pouch advancement surgery to reduce the length of my rectal cuff - I'm not keen on this because it carries a high risk of faecal incontinence, which I'd consider a worse situation to be in than all the pain I've had to deal with the last few months - at least I've managed to hold down a job through all this just about. The other option is to go back to the external ostomy bag permanantly, which is sadly looking like the best option for me now. They won't remove the pouch unless it continues to cause problems after it's defunctioned though, if that happens then they'll have to sew up my arse hole completely and then I won't be able to post on this thread ever again :p
 
They actually sew your arsehole shut?!? Blimey. They do realise there are a number of uses for an anus and not all of them are strictly biological functions, yes? Sewing up arseholes just seams to be such an excessive thing to do. I never even considered the possibility that somewhere out there there's a bloke whose job is to sew up arseholes. Probably not the entirety of his job but at least some proportion of it as on crack cross-stich duty. My eyes are watering just thinking about it. Why do they sew it shut or do I really not want to know?
 
Because if I have the pouch removed then there is actually nothing left inside me for my arsehole to connect to (colon removed 18 months ago, and my small bowel would exit through my abdomen), and you can't just have an open hole to your abdominal / pelvic cavity. It really is a last resort though because once the pouch is defunctioned it doesn't usually cause people any further issues, and it's a big big surgery again to remove it, with all the blood vessels and nerve endings that need to be disconnected. Apparently the sewn up a-hole can take 6 (presumably long, painful) months to heal completely as well, and you're not allowed to sit on a rubber ring to take the pressure off because that can pull the stitches apart.
 
Apparently the sewn up a-hole can take 6 (presumably long, painful) months to heal completely as well, and you're not allowed to sit on a rubber ring to take the pressure off because that can pull the stitches apart.

*shudders*

Explanation makes sense though - hadn't thought of it like that. All I can say is I hope you don't have to find out just how long those six months of healing are. It's easy to take an arse for granted but I'm certainly more grateful for mine being in reasonable working order than I ever have been before. It's put you through a helluva lot it seems. Perhaps fitting given it always was an arsehole.

*gets coat, leaves*

To redeem myself - and technically on-topic too - Did I Ever Tell You About The Man That Taught His Asshole To Talk?
 
Just back from the hospital to discuss my arse-related woes actually. Thankfully didn't have anything stuck up there this time though. The industrial strength steroids I've been on the last couple of weeks are working great actually and I've had the least pain and best pouch function since my last surgery in October. Sadly they're a bit of a temporary solution, due to the error in the creation of my pouch by my surgeon it's likely that when I stop the steroids the colitis will just come straight back. So I have an appointment in 8 weeks to decide whether I want to try what's called a pouch advancement surgery to reduce the length of my rectal cuff - I'm not keen on this because it carries a high risk of faecal incontinence, which I'd consider a worse situation to be in than all the pain I've had to deal with the last few months - at least I've managed to hold down a job through all this just about. The other option is to go back to the external ostomy bag permanantly, which is sadly looking like the best option for me now. They won't remove the pouch unless it continues to cause problems after it's defunctioned though, if that happens then they'll have to sew up my arse hole completely and then I won't be able to post on this thread ever again :p

Awh, hope you're better soon. This thread is for people like you

Evey xxxx
 
I'm on 24mg buprenorphine a day and although it is making a difference to my digestive system, not nearly as much as you might think.

Slightly congested but no real issues with constipation. Had a few turds that were a bit of a squeeze but nothing excruciating (which opiate shits can be sometimes).

Yeah poo talk!
 
Just back from the hospital to discuss my arse-related woes actually. Thankfully didn't have anything stuck up there this time though.

Lol at 'this time'.=D

Sucks for you in general though, hope things work out as best as possible for you.

If you don't mind me asking, were these problems caused by shoving things up your arse?
 
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