titicaca2
Bluelighter
Why did bupe quit working for me?
Back when I smoked, I could smoke for three months, smoke at night, and when I would start to feel sick, I would take maybe 1-2mg of bupe and feel great. 18 hours later another 1-2mg, and that was it. I was done. No more withdrawals ever and i was sleeping through the need.
In fact, if you go read some of my old posts, I'm talking about this very thing. Oh how naive I was. "How in the world am I going to detox?!" With 2mg of suboxone and no discomfort, was the answer.
I did this several times and gradually I started needing more bupe, but I didn't think anything of it.
Then I didn't use bupe for about 9 months. Straight heroin, smoking for 6 months, then shooting for 3. The next time I tried to take suboxone it hardly took the edge off. All that happened was I DIDN'T shit or vomit. But everything else. The hot/cold chills, goosebumps, anxiety, malaise, insomnia, complete agony. I took another 8mg with no relief. I waited 36 hours in this state before caving and getting dope. I thought maybe I had done something wrong, maybe I fucked up. Maybe I hadn't waited long enough?
So a month later I checked into a (free local) detox clinic that used pure bupe 2mg pills. 36 hours later and 12mg down, my BP was 80/60 with a HR of 144. I was flailing and hadn't slept even for a second. They were going to send me to the ER, but instead my mom picked me up and took me to get dope.
She said seeing me like that scarred her for life. It was the most ill she has ever seen me.
Fast forward two more months where mommy checked me into a fancy rehab center 120 miles away. At midnight, the nurse had to call the doctor for special order because I was not responding to the suboxone. They put me on a 24mg a day dose the second day (first day on subs because I came in high), and the ceiling dose of 32 mg the next day. I was in agony. A nurse had to sit at my bedside to monitor me. They were sweet, putting hot or cold washcloths on my forehead to comfort me, changing my sweated out sheets, and rubbing my back. Again a dangerously low BP and high HR. I didn't eat for 4 days, and I didn't sleep for 7. Then I took a two hour nap. I was started on 50mg of seroquel for sleep, and incrementally every night when I would crawl to the nurses station at midnight to prove I was still awake, the doctor increased the dosages. By the 7th day I was on 300mg Seroquel, 150 Trazadone, and 100 Diphenhydramine. What a joke. I pretty much cold turkeyed. Except i didn't get the runs or vomit.Those dogmatic doctors wouldn't even give me a .25 Lorazepam.
Due to the fact that I had no escape, I kicked. And for the 30 days I was there I slept for a total of maybe 24 hours. I would hallucinate and dream while awake, I had no focus, my eyes were perpetually red, and I was exhausted, mentally and physically. I shot up the second I got home.
I used for a month straight, and here's where my story gets confusing. I was definitely strung out again. We went to a road trip to Idaho, I did my last shot in the morning. I took two klonipin and drank two beers and passed out at about midnight. I woke up at 5 in dopesick agony, I took one 8mg sub, and within 45 minutes, I was back to sleep with only mild sweats. The next day I felt alright, with only mild hot/cold flashes, and this was me on sub. Again, unfortunately, that night when I got home, I used. I've been using ever since and that was July. So about 8 months after that experience.
This morning was hell, I waited 24 hours and put one of the strips under my tongue, and within a few minutes I was puking. It was mostly the taste. Then I snorted about 3 mg in each nostril of 8mg orange suboxone. I waited 45 minutes, but when I had no relief, I did my emergency dope.
Just now I went back and read some of my former posts from 2009. 2mg's of sub detoxed me start to finish with almost no discomfort.
You guys tell me why? Did my brain figure out it was being tricked with a "partial agonist" and say "screw you thats not what I want!" Or is there a better explanation?
Back when I smoked, I could smoke for three months, smoke at night, and when I would start to feel sick, I would take maybe 1-2mg of bupe and feel great. 18 hours later another 1-2mg, and that was it. I was done. No more withdrawals ever and i was sleeping through the need.
In fact, if you go read some of my old posts, I'm talking about this very thing. Oh how naive I was. "How in the world am I going to detox?!" With 2mg of suboxone and no discomfort, was the answer.
I did this several times and gradually I started needing more bupe, but I didn't think anything of it.
Then I didn't use bupe for about 9 months. Straight heroin, smoking for 6 months, then shooting for 3. The next time I tried to take suboxone it hardly took the edge off. All that happened was I DIDN'T shit or vomit. But everything else. The hot/cold chills, goosebumps, anxiety, malaise, insomnia, complete agony. I took another 8mg with no relief. I waited 36 hours in this state before caving and getting dope. I thought maybe I had done something wrong, maybe I fucked up. Maybe I hadn't waited long enough?
So a month later I checked into a (free local) detox clinic that used pure bupe 2mg pills. 36 hours later and 12mg down, my BP was 80/60 with a HR of 144. I was flailing and hadn't slept even for a second. They were going to send me to the ER, but instead my mom picked me up and took me to get dope.
She said seeing me like that scarred her for life. It was the most ill she has ever seen me.
Fast forward two more months where mommy checked me into a fancy rehab center 120 miles away. At midnight, the nurse had to call the doctor for special order because I was not responding to the suboxone. They put me on a 24mg a day dose the second day (first day on subs because I came in high), and the ceiling dose of 32 mg the next day. I was in agony. A nurse had to sit at my bedside to monitor me. They were sweet, putting hot or cold washcloths on my forehead to comfort me, changing my sweated out sheets, and rubbing my back. Again a dangerously low BP and high HR. I didn't eat for 4 days, and I didn't sleep for 7. Then I took a two hour nap. I was started on 50mg of seroquel for sleep, and incrementally every night when I would crawl to the nurses station at midnight to prove I was still awake, the doctor increased the dosages. By the 7th day I was on 300mg Seroquel, 150 Trazadone, and 100 Diphenhydramine. What a joke. I pretty much cold turkeyed. Except i didn't get the runs or vomit.Those dogmatic doctors wouldn't even give me a .25 Lorazepam.
Due to the fact that I had no escape, I kicked. And for the 30 days I was there I slept for a total of maybe 24 hours. I would hallucinate and dream while awake, I had no focus, my eyes were perpetually red, and I was exhausted, mentally and physically. I shot up the second I got home.
I used for a month straight, and here's where my story gets confusing. I was definitely strung out again. We went to a road trip to Idaho, I did my last shot in the morning. I took two klonipin and drank two beers and passed out at about midnight. I woke up at 5 in dopesick agony, I took one 8mg sub, and within 45 minutes, I was back to sleep with only mild sweats. The next day I felt alright, with only mild hot/cold flashes, and this was me on sub. Again, unfortunately, that night when I got home, I used. I've been using ever since and that was July. So about 8 months after that experience.
This morning was hell, I waited 24 hours and put one of the strips under my tongue, and within a few minutes I was puking. It was mostly the taste. Then I snorted about 3 mg in each nostril of 8mg orange suboxone. I waited 45 minutes, but when I had no relief, I did my emergency dope.
Just now I went back and read some of my former posts from 2009. 2mg's of sub detoxed me start to finish with almost no discomfort.
You guys tell me why? Did my brain figure out it was being tricked with a "partial agonist" and say "screw you thats not what I want!" Or is there a better explanation?
