DXM to feel the feelings of divorce

[exists]

yeah,i'm planning how to take it now.

empty house.blues on the stereo.my guitars close by.

will start w low doses,then work myself up.

I'm wishing you the best, man! The first DXM trip is often the kindest

My apologies dude, what I should really have said, is that it is not sacred to any long standing indigenous culture, it is not a hallucinogen at this dose range, and it can be somewhat similar to acid but has many notable differences.

I realize now that any substance can be sacred for various cultures/individuals, and that myself in the past had held dxm as being somewhat similar to being sacred, so it was wrong of me to declare otherwise.
In my experience with dxm I have not experienced any legit hallucinations on the lower 2 plateaus. It can definitely become a hallucinogen at higher doses, but i have trouble calling low dose dxm hallucinogenic, in the sense of a hallucinogen being a substance that causes unreal things to be experienced as being 100% real.
I am sorry for any confusion that my original response to the op may have caused, and i would like to add a +1 to what lucidsdreamr said about how dxm shines most in the inner world, and that watching a movie on it would be pointless.

It's OK, I know what you're trying to say! Personally, I can trip on such low doses, but everyone's different. Cannabis helps.

Movies aren't a total waste of a good robotrip; it can often be enlightening to watch one from such a strange perspective. Watching films on LSD is a bigger waste, IMO, due to its rarity

 

[Mr. Meowfish]

1st - wanted to say I wish you the best OP. I went through a similar situation in my early 20's with my 1st love. We got married - a little over a year later and she's sleeping with her Tattoo Artist who was at OUR Wedding/Reception. Sometimes Human Beings can just be shitty, that's probably one of the hardest lessons that I've learned time and again in life. Give just about anyone enough motivation or space to be shady/selfish - they usually will be, especially as we get older. At least that was my experience. Funnily enough tho, I used DXM more than any other drug to help get myself finally over what had happened.

DXM allowed me to enter a state of mind where I felt comfortable enough in my own skin to analyze EXACTLY what had happened between Myself, my Ex-Wife, and the friend who she left me for and married less than a year later. DXM taught me A LOT about being human basically. It allowed me to accept the roll that I had played in pushing her away from me via my own personality quirkiness. DXM actually has a good amount of depth to it, IF you give it the chance and don't go into it with a mental bias. I feel that not only did it help me recover from the disaster that I became for a good 3-4 years after my divorce - it also was VERY helpful for enabling me to get off of and STAY off of Heroin - as it satisfied that warm, opiate craving that I would get - without being addictive physically, although it can be mentally reinforcing the way that Marijuana can be,which some people choose to call addiction. DXM is not addictive, it's just plain good ole fun sometimes. It reminds me of the good times in my life, it makes me feel like a little kid if that makes sense. I love to just go run around in a field and climb some trees with my headphones on. It can be a really amazing, enlightening time - you just have to be willing to go with the flow. DXM is FUCKING WEIRD. Not all people like it. Some people love it. It's just as bizarre and unique as other Dissociatives can be. Give it a go with an open mind, your favorite music ON HEADPHONES, and some Xanex or Valium around if you find it to be overpowering. Smoking weed while you're starting to peak on the drug can help you control any nausea of vomiting, as well as REALLY improve the trip. I used to only use DXM IF I had weed to smoke. If I didn't have any, I wasn't as interested in taking it, although I have plenty of times. I went thru periods where I would trip on DXM for 45-60 days in a row at a time. One of my favorite activities was to go to the local $1 movie theaters, pick out a movie that I liked the title of, but knew nothing about. I would time it so that about 15mins into the movie - I would be REALLY fucked up, and I would just sink down into my chair and become one with the film. It was a pretty awesome experience almost always. The only thing that sucked was that I couldn't smoke weed in the movie theater, so I started to make/bring Edibles with me! It was a very sad time in my life that I now look back on fondly. I grew up A LOT in a short period of time, partially thanks to using DXM.

Fuck you to anyone that calls it a "Teenagers Drug". It's Poor Man's PCP, and a damn good equivalent/substitute if you ask me. My first time trying
PCP, I was like damn, something seems REALLY familiar about this drug........................OH YEAH, DXM!! Have a good time, keep and open mind - and you will heal soon enough. Definitely spend some time getting to know yourself and who you are without your significant other BEFORE you start sleeping with other people. They'll just disappoint you or weird you out. That's what happened to me. I would've picked DXM alone with some weed over fucking the best looking female I could find ANYDAY during that time in my life. Maybe that's not you - but just a statement to keep in mind. Don't feel bad if you don't want to fuck. It's pretty normal when getting divorced. It used to make me get really stressed tho thinking i would never let myself be intimate with another person. Divorce=Time. You just have to learn the art of patience, and soon enough - you'll be twice the person that you were before. Dissociatives can be AMAZING Catalyst to Personal Growth. Keep that in mind. Peace, and best wishes.

 

[teological]

Guys, guys all these sad times mixed with DXM...I also have a story which I have never shared, and I think it belongs here, nice and hidden.

Good luck thedawn. First make sure you check that you are not allergic. Also, 350mgs is not enough to trip out. You will be functional and a little drowsy. You do not want to pick up a habit of any drugs right? Because there are a class that can help through tough times quite well, but it is basically game over as you will use everyday...are you after once off use or regular to get through this time?

Honestly, what I have found through observation and experience, problems usually resolve whilst you are sober. If you take shortcuts with drugs, the problems do not get resolved in quite the right way...just my 2 cents.

Anyway, read this HORROR story that happened to me a year or so ago.

NSFW:

I bought a new puppy. I LOVED my new puppy, my new best friend in this lonely life. One night I was dexxing, on about 300mg. My puppy was outside lying down outside the door. I was going outside to play with it and have a smoke. As I stepped outside, with my fucked up head being dexxed, and put all of my entire robo weight on one foot as I was stepping out, and you guessed it, I stepped on its little head by accident. I realized I stepped on it and I saw it curl around my foot. I thought it was fine and I must of just missed it or it pulled away just in time. I call its name, no sound. I pick it up and bring it inside. Inside I see, it is just staring up at me, eyes open, but no movement. I see inside its ear it has blood. I start saying its name, realizing I have severely hurt it. Then, I start turning around in circles, still unable to cry yelling its name. I turn more and more in circles, going insane. Then I fall to the floor on my knees, and bang, the water works. I cry and cry and cry and cry, feeling insane, I beg god to reverse it, I go crazy, cry and cry for about 45 minutes straight. Had to call my parents over to my house as I was going berserk...we go off to an emergency VET in the middle of the night. They take it in, then tell us it is fatally wounded, needs to be put down. They put it down and give it back to me the sam night wrapped in a cotton type material. We take it home. I feel a little more sober, take a strong hit of a benzo and sleep. That was my DXM night of absolute horror, I could not believe it happened. Took me a long time to ever use DXM again and I have not gotten a new pet since.

I know this does not compare to divorce guys, I am just saying DXM can help heal, but it can also make one go insane if something bad happens, like almost surreal and you can not believe it happened...

 

[Transform]

Good luck thedawn. First make sure you check that you are not allergic. Also, 350mgs is not enough to trip out. You will be functional and a little drowsy.

I totally disagree. 350mg is a very strong dose for someone with no tolerance. I would recommend 150mg for a first timer to check for common intolerance, and then 350mg as a maximum for second time users.

 

[exists]

teological, your story gives me a bad, sinking feeling. I'm so sorry that happened to you I can understand not wanting to trip on DXM again, due to associative memories.

When things go wrong on a DXM trip, they go terribly wrong. Once you start to feel panic, it's hard to calm down again. I probably would have been every been as distraught & insane as you were

 

[Thorns Have Roses]

*stuff*

DXM helped me deal with an emotionally traumatic event by acknowledging my feelings about it (I didn't go into it trying to do that, but it happened). It didn't solve the problem, but the chronic anxiety the event left me with was perceptibly lessened. Good luck man.

 

[ComfortablyNumb95]

NSFW:

I bought a new puppy. I LOVED my new puppy, my new best friend in this lonely life. One night I was dexxing, on about 300mg. My puppy was outside lying down outside the door. I was going outside to play with it and have a smoke. As I stepped outside, with my fucked up head being dexxed, and put all of my entire robo weight on one foot as I was stepping out, and you guessed it, I stepped on its little head by accident. I realized I stepped on it and I saw it curl around my foot. I thought it was fine and I must of just missed it or it pulled away just in time. I call its name, no sound. I pick it up and bring it inside. Inside I see, it is just staring up at me, eyes open, but no movement. I see inside its ear it has blood. I start saying its name, realizing I have severely hurt it. Then, I start turning around in circles, still unable to cry yelling its name. I turn more and more in circles, going insane. Then I fall to the floor on my knees, and bang, the water works. I cry and cry and cry and cry, feeling insane, I beg god to reverse it, I go crazy, cry and cry for about 45 minutes straight. Had to call my parents over to my house as I was going berserk...we go off to an emergency VET in the middle of the night. They take it in, then tell us it is fatally wounded, needs to be put down. They put it down and give it back to me the sam night wrapped in a cotton type material. We take it home. I feel a little more sober, take a strong hit of a benzo and sleep. That was my DXM night of absolute horror, I could not believe it happened. Took me a long time to ever use DXM again and I have not gotten a new pet since.

fuck what a sad story.. i can imagine such a thing could be shocking if happened while sober, but while all drugged up on dxm... it must have been a terrible night

I totally disagree. 350mg is a very strong dose for someone with no tolerance. I would recommend 150mg for a first timer to check for common intolerance, and then 350mg as a maximum for second time users.

this. for a first timer, 350 mgs definetely won't make you feel "a little drowsy", at least IME, it's a very pleasurable body buzz and for a first timer it can be quite intense

 

[Thorns Have Roses]

^Yeah, 350mg ought to alter someone's perspective (unless they have a significant dissociative tolerance) enough to be therapeutically viable. I think the intoxication/intensity of the higher plateaux would be less likely to lead to long-term benefit in someone not accustomed to the headspace or side-effects. Working your way up slowly is almost always a superior strategy to jumping in head first.

now,I have just ordered some DXM which i know nothing about [besides that it] is a hallucinogen and like acid.

Hallucinogen is a misleading term, and vague to the point of uselessness. Psychedelics' (e.g. LSD, psilocybin, DMT) pharmacological mechanism of action is primarily mediated via 5-HT_2A receptor agonism, while Dissociatives (e.g. DXM, Ketamine, PCP) work through NMDA receptor antagonism. The two classes of drugs are substantially dissimilar, even though both may be called "trippy" and are inclined to produce feelings of Oneness.

I plan a day off,have ordered some new blues box sets from amazon
to keep me entertained.

Music is certainly enjoyable while on DXM, prepare a variety of genres and moods, check out the B&D music on dissociatives thread for suggestions. There is some variability between sober music appreciation and dissociated/psychedelicized music appreciation, IME you're less able to differentiate between feelings the music invokes and what you yourself feel. Also, be wary lest the music prove distracting/escapist and lead you away from your intended purpose, but at the same time don't avoid it altogether, it can shake you out of undesired negativity like nothing else.

I also got DMT just a little bit.
would that be the same or different?

again,this is not for partying.it's for my soul.needs healing.

after reading BL i think DMT might b better.

yeah or no?

DMT, when combined with a MOAI (aya/pharma-huasca), has a sterling reputation for healing/therapeutic use amongst the psychedelics (parenteral DMT sans MAOI, not so much). You can try both the chemicals you have access to.

Now this is speculative, but I think you might try the DXM first, dissociatives allow you to approach things impassively, so you can look at your feelings/thought processes without becoming lost in a torrent of emotion. Caveats would include dissociatives offering long-term benefit to a smaller percentage of users, and their much higher abuse liability, compared with traditional psychedelics. A psychedelic like DMT will force you to confront your feelings, often propelling folks to a major breakthrough, but also might spiral into unproductive negativity in the unlucky/unprepared (handling psychedelics well while young does not necessarily translate into handling them well later in life).

However, if you were forced to pick between the two, the psychedelic is the way to go. My recommendation is based off your saying that you only have a lil' bit of DMT, and tries to maximize benefit given few (I'm guessing one or two?) possible administrations. Ideally, the dissociative would be something with few attempts, and the psychedelic something you can approach as needed over a longer period of time.

 

[elucidator]

I totally disagree. 350mg is a very strong dose for someone with no tolerance. I would recommend 150mg for a first timer to check for common intolerance, and then 350mg as a maximum for second time users.

The dose response curve for DXM is directly linked to body weight ratios, so due to the OPs body weight outlined in post# 3, a single dose of 350 mg would be not quite enough to get into second plateau. Over 450 would be needed to get into 2nd, according to this dosage calculator.

http://dxm.darkridge.com/calc.html

Doing a small initial tester dose is very important with DXM though, as you never know if you may be over-efficient with the liver enzyme called cytochrome P450-2D6.

DXM is converted to DXO by a liver enzyme called cytochrome P450-2D6 (debrisoquine 4-hydroxylase). About 7% of Caucasians and 0.5% of Asians have a highly inefficient (70 times slower) version of this enzyme, and cannot metabolize DXM to DXO effectively (10). About 0.5 to 2% of the population have multiple copies of the P450 gene, leading to extremely fast metabolism of DXM into DXO (155). After being converted to DXO, the enzymes P450-3A4 and P450-3A5 convert DXO to 3-hydroxymorphinan (77).

 

[teological]

I totally disagree. 350mg is a very strong dose for someone with no tolerance. I would recommend 150mg for a first timer to check for common intolerance, and then 350mg as a maximum for second time users.

Well I did say, check for allergies, which I presume would include that unique person who would stay high for days...IME 300-350mg, I am just drowsy and it leaves in less than 3 hours. he is also a heavy guy, and DXM is weight/dose dependent is it not?

 

[ComfortablyNumb95]

Hallucinogen is a misleading term, and vague to the point of uselessness.

exactly my thoughts. i really hate it when people use that word, it doesn"t mean jack shit

 

[Transform]

Ah, I did not notice OPs body mass. Yes, 350mg is quite a reasonable suggestion in light of that.

When I talk about an intolerance ("allergy") test I am more looking to rule out that OP is one of a large number of people who hate DXM because it makes them horribly nauseous and disorientated.

 

[Bob Loblaw]

I find Shpongle always helps navigate the dissociated headspace, but if blues is your thing, stick to what you like, m8.

Personally a strong 2nd/low 3rd plateau is good for introspection, though as the dose gets higher, it can be more difficult to come away from the experience remembering anything meaningful. But I don't recommend dosing so high until you've experienced the chemical more. Set & setting are also huge with DXM, so def do it alone.