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...and the damage done.

amnesiaseizure

amnesiaseizure

Bluelighter
Joined
Mar 4, 2003
Messages
2,365
Location
@ the right place @ the wrong time
6 year opiate habit kicked well and truly up the arse. Who would of though the legs of a foetus could kick harder than my lengthy appendages?

The last few years involved, death, near-death, cancer, cancer scares, He C scares, murder investigations, drug dealing, stealing, and losing a home. Plus shit loads of really great stuff too.

I guess I'm trying to say that i yeah, i haven't been posting a lot when i used to be really regular but I've had a lot to deal with and joining in debates online came.fairly.far.down the list. At present, my daughter is full of milk and snoozing on me so i thought I'd offer some hope.

Ever time I've seen an "RIP......" thread lately I've felt tearful and am shocked at.how.different BL is from when i joined. (am i right on this? Old time BL's?) Opiates seem to be out in the open so much more here these days. They KILL creativity. Let alone the individual and the relationship that surround them. That's all I'll say on that.

So hi all again, maybe I'll post.more often and maybe not - a child does indeed take up a lot of time, all of it a priority. Stay safe and well all of you and enjoy the Sunday, all i can hear are little breaths and a clock ticking. Perfect. <3
 
Firstly, well done, and congratulations. Yeah, you're right on the opiate front, man. When I joined, I didn't expect to see an RIP thread, every time I logged on. :(
 
Yeah, enjoy it, because the thing with kids is they grow up. And you really don't want to miss that happening.

And if nothing else, you will find yourself doing things over the course of the next few years that will, when related in mixed company, starkly divide the parents from the non-parents .....
 
Kept looking over the last 6 months to see if you had posted, to see if we had a baby or status update to see how things were going for you, cos you both completely disappeared it seemed.

Always remember that kick-ass pic of you and yer missus looking dapper at that wedding. Awesome pic.

Great to see this update.

Big loves n good luck with yer wee one <3
 
It's really lovely to see good news posted on here. It obviously doesn' t make the RIPs any better, but does offer some balance.

Best of luck with your little one. <3
 
^Aye, I never wished it to the OP but I wish it now, the very best of luck and keep it to the straight and keep it to the narrow.
 
Not enough storys like this :), really truely well done, and congratulations on your beautiful little girl :)
 
Good news man, hope it lasts and you don't fall down the spiral again. Hopefully the child will be more than enough to keep you on the right path.

So since you mentioned it, was BL back in the day different in terms of the acceptance of heavy opiate use? I had the feeling that this place was once full of pill monsters chatting the week away waiting for friday and trippers, spiritual explorers, RC pioneers and the like. These days on the forum there is a hell lot of idiotic badly spelt one liner posts of people bragging about the stupid amounts of smack and crack they do.
 
Marmalade said:
Kept looking over the last 6 months to see if you had posted, to see if we had a baby or status update to see how things were going for you, cos you both completely disappeared it seemed.

Always remember that kick-ass pic of you and yer missus looking dapper at that wedding. Awesome pic.

Great to see this update.

Big loves n good luck with yer wee one <3
Click to expand...

So nice to hear you remembered us Marmz, like i said, we had a lot of stuff to be getting on with! Its funny cause i was once so regular with the posts but just felt over the past couple of years that i had very little to add or to ask. Sounds a bit self pitying that.

We're all tucked up in a warm bed now (and yep to whoever said it, co-sleeping is already dividing the parents from the non). I love it though - waking up each day with Matilda giving me a big toothless grin and then carrying her downstairs to watch documentaries with a bottle of milk, the Filth and the Fury was a recent top choice. Oh, and we learnt a lot about the cold war this morning.
 
Mental Kenny said:
So since you mentioned it, was BL back in the day different in terms of the acceptance of heavy opiate use? I had the feeling that this place was once full of pill monsters chatting the week away waiting for friday and trippers, spiritual explorers, RC pioneers and the like. These days on the forum there is a hell lot of idiotic badly spelt one liner posts of people bragging about the stupid amounts of smack and crack they do.
Click to expand...

As far as i remember it, yeah. Once that heroin drought hit there was just a major influx of people trying anything to get in with new circles.of users and find out what had gone wrong. Really don't get the boasting about how great a smack buzz someone got at whenever-o'clock though. Who the fuck cares, did you actually learn anything or seek to make your environment more pleasant?
 
amnesiaseizure said:
Ever time I've seen an "RIP......" thread lately I've felt tearful and am shocked at.how.different BL is from when i joined. (am i right on this? Old time BL's?) Opiates seem to be out in the open so much more here these days. They KILL creativity. Let alone the individual and the relationship that surround them. That's all I'll say on that.
Click to expand...

Hi AS.

Yes, back in the day you would never see an RIP thread.

I went on a 6 year hiatus myself, but on return was shocked to see

A) So many new drugs available legal and illegal
B) So many RIP threads, a Bluelight Shrine
C) So much opiate use. Most of the talk back then was about pills and weed.
 
Mental Kenny said:
These days on the forum there is a hell lot of idiotic badly spelt one liner posts of people bragging about the stupid amounts of smack and crack they do.
Click to expand...



cant see it myself. aside from brimz occasionally, but he's been doing that from the start


selective perception, ennit? most of the posts i seem to see could be summed up in my mind as [posh kid] + [random letters & numbers] x [more letters & numbers]

[posh kid #2] "whoa, hardcore"
 
BlindHelperMonkey said:
selective perception, ennit? most of the posts i seem to see could be summed up in my mind as [posh kid] + [random letters & numbers] x [more letters & numbers]

[posh kid #2] "whoa, hardcore"
Click to expand...

Haha :)

PS Welcome back AS. Yes EADD is a different place now. But don't go blaming all the deaths on the fact we have heroin users filling the gap left by the demise of ecstasy. Not sure how many of the 8 (?) deaths this year are down to heroin. In the 4 where I know the cause of death, heroin played no part at all.
 
StoneHappyMonday said:
Haha :)

PS Welcome back AS. Yes EADD is a different place now. But don't go blaming all the deaths on the fact we have heroin users filling the gap left by the demise of ecstasy. Not sure how many of the 8 (?) deaths this year are down to heroin. In the 4 where I know the cause of death, heroin played no part at all.
Click to expand...

Exactly what i was thinking .
 
StoneHappyMonday said:
Haha :)

PS Welcome back AS. Yes EADD is a different place now. But don't go blaming all the deaths on the fact we have heroin users filling the gap left by the demise of ecstasy. Not sure how many of the 8 (?) deaths this year are down to heroin. In the 4 where I know the cause of death, heroin played no part at all.
Click to expand...

Hello to you mate, fair point fairly made. You know when you just get that feeling that 'something' has changed? Well i get that feeling and by and large i post on my phone so can't be as articulate as I'd like. Plus my 5 month old keeps trying to alter my spelling.

Anyway.....i wanted to offer more a message of hope (maybe a little boast but hey, why the fuck not, its not often?)

The last thing i want is to start a debate about "the good old days". Fuck that, we've got YouTube, life's awesome!!
 
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