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Anybody have a crazy asian mom?

Control D, yeah I think the co-dependence and culture change does definitely and (probably) play a much huger role with the craziness. My mom tried (and was actually successful) in returning a laptop to BestBuy after a year of using it. Glad to know someone is going through a similar situation.

Sticky Green, sorry I am just so irritated with my situation and the crazy driving just annoys me even more. It's in both our names. And if I sold the car, I wouldn't have a mother. Like, she would disown me. I don't think that'll help my situation at all. We haven't talked in weeks because I called the car "stupid" (and threatened to sell it).
 
wow reading through these I feel sorry for you. My mom was strict but was never a control freak. Even if they were pretty strict to me in my younger years they always gave me a chance to reason out and not escalate our arguments. I'm sorry but if your mom was my mom she would definitely drive me mental as well. It seems selfish of her to be acting this way IMO.
 
Thanks for the sympathy. Lol. I guess I don't want her to die and then I'll regret not being closer to her, you know? Like I want our relationship to heal and for us to be civil with each other. But I really think she hates me.. so I don't know.
 
Pretty_Diamonds said:
Thanks for the sympathy. Lol. I guess I don't want her to die and then I'll regret not being closer to her, you know? Like I want our relationship to heal and for us to be civil with each other. But I really think she hates me.. so I don't know.
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Yeah but the thing is, I don't think she realizes that her actions are causing you to feel that way, and I don't even think she understands how you feel. Would it be possible to just give it some space, like maybe not speak with each other for a while and maybe she'll miss you? I think you have tried your best to be as close to her as possible but it seems to be not working. This is the only way I could think of that might make her realize your situation.
 
is it possible she might be also be frustrated, with you that is, for perceived irresponsibility or "dissipation" [like doing drugs, not having direction, w/e]... being an eastern immigrant, she probably can't relate to the insanity of youth [it's hard even for n. american parents probably]. how old are you? for me I started to accept my parents a lot more and learned and how to work with them around age 25 or so.
 
^I'm 22. Just got accepted into a Masters program. Completed my BA (paid for it and worked F/T). Maybe she'll accept me when I complete the masters program (if I magically come up with the funds)?
Maya said:
Yeah but the thing is, I don't think she realizes that her actions are causing you to feel that way, and I don't even think she understands how you feel. Would it be possible to just give it some space, like maybe not speak with each other for a while and maybe she'll miss you? I think you have tried your best to be as close to her as possible but it seems to be not working. This is the only way I could think of that might make her realize your situation.
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Yeah, everyone's suggesting a break but I feel as though it makes things worse. Just the another thing she can hold against me on how I "wasn't there for her when I needed her". I'm done many breaks but it doesn't seem like she does misses? She'll just complain on what I missed blah blah blah and didn't help her with blah blah blah so she had to get all these other people. I was trying to sign a contract for a unit that she owns because I wanted to move into a secure building and she agreed. We cancelled our current lease, packed up all our stuff and a week before we were suppose to move in she pulls it. Like, I just put a customer in whose going to pay more so... yeah. I was like, wtf! We did all this, you PROMISE, you're my MOTHER. I'm your DAUGHTER!!! And she was like, psft, you call me your daughter but what do you do for me? NOTHING!
 
Hmm...it sounds like you need to just stop arguing with her, but also be wary of her wrath. "It takes two to tango". If you stop struggling with her, there will be no more struggle :D
 
hmmm no, I don't think I can ever take the hits and just not say what is on my mind. If I were you, I will stay away from her I'm sorry it just seems so hard to get a long with your mom. Like you said, I might regret that I didn't get close with her but I don't think I can ever stomach how she will treat me and the everlasting arguments and such. It's just my personality and how I am, if I tried so hard to do everything and I don't see results, it's time to move away.
 
Yeah, well we recently got into another fight so I don't think we'll be talking again for a while. Since she didn't want to pay for my tuition, she agreed to check out the credit unions for loan option and be my co-signer. So that morning she gives me a call and tells me that she can't because of she already has two loans out. Then she told me that I needed to sell my car and work on my people skills because I'm such a horrible person. I just hung up on her. I mean, she owns all these properties and can't offered to put any of her properties down because its not worth "the risk" of losing one of her properties for my "education".
 
Pretty_Diamonds said:
Yeah, well we recently got into another fight so I don't think we'll be talking again for a while. Since she didn't want to pay for my tuition, she agreed to check out the credit unions for loan option and be my co-signer. So that morning she gives me a call and tells me that she can't because of she already has two loans out. Then she told me that I needed to sell my car and work on my people skills because I'm such a horrible person. I just hung up on her. I mean, she owns all these properties and can't offered to put any of her properties down because its not worth "the risk" of losing one of her properties for my "education".
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Omg seriously????8) Reading through your post it makes me irritated. I haven't known a mother who would treat her daughter like that. Risk losing one of her properties for the education of her daughter? Wow that tops it all.
 
Yeah, she's pretty shady. Especially since she has like TEN properties. I don't know what her deal was. When I was little, she always told me that I needed to be a doctor and every step I make, she seems so unsupportive? :( Well, my boyfriend and I are trying to get a loan from an FCU so hopefully we can figure things out...
 
Hey you :) . Well i know we haven't talked in ages but i have probably bitched to you about my crazy mom sometime in the past =D. She's Irish not Asian but yeah she's still bonkers. One thing i have learned is that there is just no pleasing some people they are always going to find something they don't like about you and bitch at you for it. I'm sure i could be a doctor and my mom would still be nagging me :p
 
i wish i had a crazy asian mom! i would definitely sacrifice healthy parental-child relationship for delicious home cooked meals :D
 
She doesn't think you will finish it.

I'm half Filipino, and my wife is from the Philippines. It's the same thing from her family to a point. My MiL is awesome though, and she can cook very well. :P
 
My father is Japanese, and me being his only and born a girl caused him alot of grief. The only things he ever said to me were things like....toughen up! Grow some balls! Be a man! He was an ass.
 
I'm not asian, but I have/have had plenty of asian friends, and I've met their mothers... all crazy. In all seriousness, they were all just absolutely insane. I think it's just a thing...
 
^ I think I've just accepted that. It still hurts.
paranoid android said:
Hey you :) . Well i know we haven't talked in ages but i have probably bitched to you about my crazy mom sometime in the past =D. She's Irish not Asian but yeah she's still bonkers. One thing i have learned is that there is just no pleasing some people they are always going to find something they don't like about you and bitch at you for it. I'm sure i could be a doctor and my mom would still be nagging me :p
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Yo, I think I PMed you. She's just unhappy, but maybe I just want reassurance that she loves me? I don't know. She called to bitch at me for not "returning the car" to her place but I told her REPEATEDLY that's not happening till she gives me back the $ I invested in it.
jam uh weezy said:
i wish i had a crazy asian mom! i would definitely sacrifice healthy parental-child relationship for delicious home cooked meals :D
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My mom made salmon and rice everyday.
Joeof1 said:
She doesn't think you will finish it.

I'm half Filipino, and my wife is from the Philippines. It's the same thing from her family to a point. My MiL is awesome though, and she can cook very well. :P
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That's actually an interested theory. She's been asking me like WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO WITH YOUR LIFE? WHAT'S YOUR PLAN?!!?! And I've been all like I'm going to be a doctor MOM, like how you always wanted me to be... !!!!!
Kieko said:
My father is Japanese, and me being his only and born a girl caused him alot of grief. The only things he ever said to me were things like....toughen up! Grow some balls! Be a man! He was an ass.
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Lol, at least he cared about you? My father was Spanish/Mexican. Dipshit. He used to make me clean everything and treat me like his personal maid while my older brother (1 year older) had no chores, no responsibilities, no curfew/rules.
 
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