In love with a Whore

[B1tO'RoughJack]

Yo - you need to stop being a masochist, learn to love yourself. Stop hanging around with her until you have sorted yourself out, otherwise whatever friendship you guys have will be irreovocably FUCKED.

You're not unconditionally loving her. You are not in love with her. You have an infatuation, until you love yourself you cannot give real love to her, or anyone else for that matter.

Good look mate - it will feel good in a few years.

 

[gr33n3y3z]

+ Whore = STDS

 

[B1tO'RoughJack]

"but you can't make a ho a housewife..."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WGXhmz1bEfg

 

[gr33n3y3z]

+ 1

 

[Boupstarnm]

She's got 2 grand and she still doesn't have enough money saved? Most places you can get in an apartment for about half that. $600 for rent, $600 security deposit, $100 to get utilites turned on and plenty of money for furniture n shit from goodwill.

If you don't make her move out prepare to get walked all over and lied to. Some people are just kinda fucked and when they're sick they can't be helped. The more you try to help the more fucked over you get. Maybe I'm projecting. There are just a bunch of things that dont add up. Run while you still can.

 

[Cwest]

I'm afraid she's using you. That's what hookers do.
Sorry.

yup... get a friend to hire her, and ask about you... I bet she wont even call you a friend, just a free home. She might seem nice but that's the point, shes most likely scum man.

sorry if that comes off super assuming and harsh but its most likely true

 

[angeleyes]

Azure I feel for you so bad man, deep down I know how you feel, that agony.

Although you can't change how she feels, you can do so much better.

I've been in a situation slightly similar but she wasn't a prostitute, but she did use me and I fell for it very hard.


Only thing I can recommend is to move on and try and find happiness elsewhere.

Best of luck.

 

[angeleyes]

yup... get a friend to hire her, and ask about you... I bet she wont even call you a friend, just a free home. She might seem nice but that's the point, shes most likely scum man.

sorry if that comes off super assuming and harsh but its most likely true

She would most likely be slightly confused that a guy would want to talk about the guy she lives with instead of having sex with her? OP said she meets random people on Craigslist and doesn't see friends or coworkers for her services.


Move on mate its the best bet, don't let her use you.

 

[Azure Cloud]

Sorry, no time for getting online over the weekend.
I do appreciate the posts and advice.

Azure Cloud, I'm glad you got a chance to talk to this girl and told her how you feel. Has she searched for a legitimate job at all? I really do feel that she is taking advantage of your generosity and friendship. How does it work while she's out with her clients, I mean who babysits her son? You deserve so much better. Just my opinion.

She has a job handling catered events but made less than $12,000 last year (I took her W2 to my tax person, that is how I know).
I know she seems really fucked up and selfish, but this thread was suppose to be more about handling my feelings than dissecting her. She actually has only once asked me to watch her kid while she was tricking. Her ex boyfriend's mother keeps the child on the weekends and this is when most of her "work" gets done.

She's got 2 grand and she still doesn't have enough money saved? Most places you can get in an apartment for about half that. $600 for rent, $600 security deposit, $100 to get utilites turned on and plenty of money for furniture n shit from goodwill.

She also needs a vehicle that runs and can pass inspection. We do live in a good size metropolitan area with crappy public transportation. She has to pay more than $100 for utilities to be turned on due to unpaid utility bills from her previous situation (he ex was actually living in the dark after she left because she did pay all their bills). There is the cost of Pre-K for her child (not cheap). And she is actually doing all her furniture shopping craigslist. Around here the Goodwills and Salvation Army stores price their goods to supply the money that pays for their mission work, not really so much to sell stuff to poor people.

She would most likely be slightly confused that a guy would want to talk about the guy she lives with instead of having sex with her? OP said she meets random people on Craigslist and doesn't see friends or coworkers for her services.
Move on mate its the best bet, don't let her use you.

Afterlyfe, I appreciate your comments the most. You get that this thread is about me, not her.

How do you learn to not love somebody? Time away from her is the only thing that will bring me peace, but I was hoping someone could tell me something quicker and easier to do, lol. Fucking other young (18+ in age) whores does not seem to help for very long and definitely hurts the bank account.

 

[Corazon]

I don't know what to say...
A lot of guys would have gotten sex from this woman in exchange for the housing, rather than harboring feelings toward her and being sexually frustrated/jealous.
Maybe it's best that you did it the way you did. Treat it as a learning experience.

 

[Azure Cloud]

I don't know what to say...
A lot of guys would have gotten sex from this woman in exchange for the housing, rather than harboring feelings toward her and being sexually frustrated/jealous.
Maybe it's best that you did it the way you did. Treat it as a learning experience.

A whore but not a slut. She would probably be on the streets homeless if I had tried that shit. I really don't think she enjoys the sex at all.

FUCK IT HURTS but I think once all this is over my heart will actually be a little bigger than it was at the beginning of all this.

 

[angeleyes]

How do you learn to not love somebody? Time away from her is the only thing that will bring me peace, but I was hoping someone could tell me something quicker and easier to do, lol.

My childhood best friend of 10 years, I found out 18 months ago that he had an "affair" (for lack of better term) with my girlfriend of 4 years. She was my high school sweetheart and he was my best friend that literally went through everything with me. I loved them both, they had their month of fun before she cut it off, two months later I found out after she confessed. Otherwise I never would have found out.

I spent the next couple of months trying to repair things with her, I found out we were going to have a child but she then hooked up with my friend and then she had it aborted because she couldn't live with the shame of it all. I still kept trying to repair things with her (she was the girl I loved), the mother of my child in all of its meaning, but she realized there was other guys out there and that torture, that agony.

18 months later and I'm almost 20 years old, am I still in love? No, the first year was agony, but now I feel so much better about myself as time has moved on, I've been working hard, playing hard and living hard to compensate. The pain never goes because the two people I supported on most in the world betrayed my trust which has left me kind of looking at life behind a veil.

Do I trust people? Sometimes. I try not to judge the entire human race for their actions but it is hard at times, I just try and enjoy my life as best that I can.


It literally was some cliché out of a movie but I look at my life and I think to myself "I am so exhausted" and I am ready to give up. But I'm moving interstate and getting out of this terrible rat race of a city to a more kicked back one where I went on holiday last month and met some amazing people there.


Azure I guess what I'm trying to say is that I've been at the peak and the bottom of a very intense relationship that damaged me greatly and changed my life in so many different ways. As time passes things do get better, it just takes a lot of time but there's the little things that can make it better, like lingerie models, cigars and fast cars.




Look towards the future and keep a smile on your face Azure, that's what I did and don't forget you aren't ever alone.

 

[Azure Cloud]

Do I trust people? Sometimes. I try not to judge the entire human race for their actions but it is hard at times, I just try and enjoy my life as best that I can.

Look towards the future and keep a smile on your face Azure, that's what I did and don't forget you aren't ever alone.

Are you really only 20 yrs old? You must have a lot of experience packed in there because you come off as much more mature.

I do appreciate the advice/condolences. I am twice your age and still struggling with all my "feelings".

AZCL

 

[Jabberwocky]

Serious. She is beautiful. I have loved her for years and she is a bit younger than me. She knows my feelings, cares greatly about me, but would never be with me in that way [friend zoned long ago].

She has fallen on hard times and has begun meeting strange men on craigslist. She says nothing is less than $150, but idk if I believe her.

I just feel so worthless now. I have done a lot for this woman, possibly more than anyone else in her life. Always kind and quick to forgive but this stabs me through the heart. Some strange cock can have her for some cash but she still won't be with me. ...it is a rule she says, no whoring with people she knows or coworkers. But it still kills me; I die a little more each day.

Right now I let her stay at my place cuz she has nowhere else to go. She does not trick at my place but she has been picked up there a few times by johns. She has finally saved enough trick money for a running vehicle and 1st & last month rent to get her own place. I hate to say this, but I hope she gets the hell out of my house soon.

I love her and always want to be her friend, but I am so jealous of these dudes that get to fuck her. I did tell her I am beginning to hate her but only because I love her so much. I told her that it is becoming unhealthy for me to be around her. Unfortunately she is more than a little younger than me and says "that is not really my fault".

Idk what I am asking but any input is valued greatly!

I've been in your position before only the girl didn't charge for sex. It drove me nuts that I loved her so much and that she wouldn't give me a chance even though we'd do almost everything together. I guess deep down she knew she was a slut and didn't want to hurt me or was afraid of commitment. At the same time I probably wanted her more cause I couldn't get her and well that's gamblers fallacy my friend - You invest your time and money in something and expect a return.

For me I ended the friendship on a new years day as she told me she hooked up with some guy. For 2 years before that we didn't really speak as I was feeling hurt again. In the end this chick is still a slut and her vag has slowly deteriorated which makes it less appealing to me. All in all I now see that accepting your losses and moving on is the best option and if you can't get her it just means she's not the right one.

 

[NJ5227]

your story sounds familiar enough that it could be mine. I feel for you bro because I have been there... lost in this woman's trance.

You need to stop fathering this woman. She is lapping it up, likely because her own father was never there. But like most daughters don't fall in love with their fathers, the same applies here. Believe me man, she might care a lot about you, but under the surface, she cares about herself first and foremost - she's been conditioned to be this way for the sake of her survival. Even if she feels remorse, she likely suppresses the hell out of it just so she can exist.

A person like this WILL drain you, either your cock, your wallet, your personal power, your self esteem, whatever it is they need at that time.

Time for you to put that fatherly attention on yourself, because you're the one who's feelings are being dragged through the mud.

The best, fastest way to get over this is to get away from her and cut off all contact. Be warned though, as soon as you do she's going to come clawing back. You'll think "this is it! She has seen the light, has woken up and seen what she has missed". Don't fall for it.

Right now it might seem selfish to you but you need to put yourself first

 

[Johnny1]

Here is the dynamic:

I feel worthless.
You give me love.
I think you're a loser - why would anyone of value love me?
Now comes some guy (a real loser) who treats me like dirt.
This guy must be worth something! He knows I'm worthless.
I want this guy and he won't give me much so I want him even more.

also

My (dad/mom) never showed me real love, so I can't process being loved.
They treated me like dirt, so I understand being treated like dirt.
It must be my fault, how they did not love me.
If I have a chance to do it over again, I will be able to get them to love me.
I'll do this over and over again with every guy who doesn't love me, trying to get it right.

 

[angeleyes]

Are you really only 20 yrs old? You must have a lot of experience packed in there because you come off as much more mature.

I do appreciate the advice/condolences. I am twice your age and still struggling with all my "feelings".

AZCL

I'm just under half a year away from being 20. Been out of home since I was just after 17, finished high school and currently in a 50k a year job, definitely doing well for myself considering a lot of people would have burned out and lost everything years ago in my situation.

My only problem is that I don't want to give up because I I like to help other people, that kind of gives me help at the same time and if I genuinely want to help and encourage other people it makes everything a bit better in my own head, like "yeah, times are tough, but we're all in this together so let's smile and make the best of it." I've been homeless at 17 with the clothes on my back, now 2 years 5 months later I'm suiting up every day, drive a nice car and do well at my job, don't get me wrong I still have emotional breakdowns and think the world is black and everything is against me. I just remember things could always definitely be A LOT worse.


I've done a bit too much living to be honest, people will read this and think "um, right, good on you mate" but I'm keen to move away and start fresh as a random in a new city and leve my past behind me.

How is your situation progressing since you posted this by the way?

 

[Cwest]

Here is the dynamic:

I feel worthless.
You give me love.
I think you're a loser - why would anyone of value love me?
Now comes some guy (a real loser) who treats me like dirt.
This guy must be worth something! He knows I'm worthless.
I want this guy and he won't give me much so I want him even more.

also

My (dad/mom) never showed me real love, so I can't process being loved.
They treated me like dirt, so I understand being treated like dirt.
It must be my fault, how they did not love me.
If I have a chance to do it over again, I will be able to get them to love me.
I'll do this over and over again with every guy who doesn't love me, trying to get it right.

this.
very well written

 

[EP158207]

I think you need to try to figure out why you are in this situation. Why do you feel like you are only worth a sex worker, with a kid, living with you rent free? (nothing against sex workers or kids) Its wonderful that you are helping out someone who is in need, but you are essentially putting your life on hold for this woman, and sooner or later shes going to get the money she needs, move out and get on with her life.

I don't know you, but it seems like you dont have much self confidence. You should be out there, with a woman who RETURNS the love, puts money towards building a life with you..and loves you for WHO you are, and not for what you can provide. Not a lady who is just going to use you as a rest stop on the journey of her life.

 

[shahab6]

how old are you?? I think ur not in love with her, your just very attractive to her.. This is very sad situation, I know its hard to see someone you love, sleep with random guys for few $100 and on CL, which is the lowest of all escorts. Also what you did for her, u did it because you waned, you shouldn't expect anything back.. This is the life she choice, i believe since this women is not your family or anything, you shouldn't care what she does.. Have her leave, and tell her no longer can be her friend, unless she stops what shes doing...
If she cares for you in any bit, she might stop, but I doubt she cares for u enough to stop.