Okay, so last Tuesday (it's now sunday, so had about 5 days recovery) I couldn't get hold of any bud and had some money to spare so ended up buying a gram of MDMA. When I got home (after smoking a joint) I split the gram into 8 lines the same size, left two of them out and poured the rest back into the bag. Then I proceeded to bomb one of those lines after which I didn't really feel anything... I waited about 45 mins before deciding nothing was gonna happen (I know, bad idea, but it was my first time and I was a complete novice) and snorting the second line (in a series of small lines - probably about 4 - split from that one main one)...
Anyway, needless to say I soon started coming up and everything started feeling really good, was really getting into TV and just any sounds and sort of stimuli were just... Ecstasy!
As I was still coming up I smoked a bowl (possibly two, can't really remember) and all I remember is how amazing outside looked when I went out and how amazing it felt to rip a cone from my bong...
Not long after smoking I was on the sofa and everything was a bit too intense, I started to lose my sense of 'control' and there was a massive sense of dissociativeness and like I couldn't get any thoughts together / there was a lag between thinking and doing. It started to scare me and I think my anxiety kicked in and I really started debating calling an ambulance, before finally deciding to just lie down in bed and try and sleep it off... Ended up just lying there for hours feeling really weird and just biting down as hard as I could on my teeth - occasionally going out for another cone in the hope it would help me sleep (which it eventually did hours later)
I managed to successfully fap though both while rolling (despite hearing that finishing is hard while rolling) and the next day when I was feeling like shite which sortta surprised me and so I'm thinking it didn't affect my Seratonin that much?
The next day I had pretty dull headache all day, felt quite 'weak' and overall like I really wanted to sleep (pretty much like when you've got bad cold / flu), but no overwhelming depression or like I wanted to kill myself or anything! I didn't really eat / have any desire to eat all day after either, but eating dinner in the evening managed to get rid of my headache and made me feel a lot better I have to say!
Anyway, 'coz it didn't go quite how I'd have liked at all I really wanna try and take some more again tonight to see if I can have a positive experience! Would it be too soon waiting 5 days to roll again and is it likely that the comedown will be much worse if I do it again ('coz I'm gonna have to sit on the train for a couple hours and got the dentist haha)? Thanks!
Anyway, needless to say I soon started coming up and everything started feeling really good, was really getting into TV and just any sounds and sort of stimuli were just... Ecstasy!
As I was still coming up I smoked a bowl (possibly two, can't really remember) and all I remember is how amazing outside looked when I went out and how amazing it felt to rip a cone from my bong...
Not long after smoking I was on the sofa and everything was a bit too intense, I started to lose my sense of 'control' and there was a massive sense of dissociativeness and like I couldn't get any thoughts together / there was a lag between thinking and doing. It started to scare me and I think my anxiety kicked in and I really started debating calling an ambulance, before finally deciding to just lie down in bed and try and sleep it off... Ended up just lying there for hours feeling really weird and just biting down as hard as I could on my teeth - occasionally going out for another cone in the hope it would help me sleep (which it eventually did hours later)
I managed to successfully fap though both while rolling (despite hearing that finishing is hard while rolling) and the next day when I was feeling like shite which sortta surprised me and so I'm thinking it didn't affect my Seratonin that much?
The next day I had pretty dull headache all day, felt quite 'weak' and overall like I really wanted to sleep (pretty much like when you've got bad cold / flu), but no overwhelming depression or like I wanted to kill myself or anything! I didn't really eat / have any desire to eat all day after either, but eating dinner in the evening managed to get rid of my headache and made me feel a lot better I have to say!
Anyway, 'coz it didn't go quite how I'd have liked at all I really wanna try and take some more again tonight to see if I can have a positive experience! Would it be too soon waiting 5 days to roll again and is it likely that the comedown will be much worse if I do it again ('coz I'm gonna have to sit on the train for a couple hours and got the dentist haha)? Thanks!
