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what to do in Scotland ?

Merchant City is good. If you're going out in the city centre avoid Sauchiehall Street like the plague, parallel to that is Bath Street, decent boozers there - Butterfly & Pig, Slouch etc. Slouch is a good shout, does decent cheap scran as well.

I'm not a fan of the west end. There's a few decent pubs round there but folk will tell you to go to Ashton Lane. Don't. It's shite & over-priced. Full of cunts wearing scarfs indoors. The west end is wear you'll see cunts that couldn't get away with cutting about the rest of Glasgow. I've seen a guy cycling to work, wearing a suit, on a fucking unicycle in the west end as if that was OK. If you did that in the southside you'd get stabbed off a 12 year old & the southside's actually no bad lol.

thanks for the replies everyone :) the 'neds' and junkies are what I want to avoid most, as every time Iv been out in Glasgow I give smackheads all my change and get verbally abused by kids in tracksuits.
Why not Sauchiehall street crackhead? I don't remember it being too bad, however I was in Scotland so I was drunk, it might be terrible in a clearer state.
My family in laws were in Lanark when I originally met them 8 years ago, fucking shit hole of a place :\ Their now in Blantyre, which is still a bit shit but so much nicer for them. There's The Cawther sp? which is a nice outdoorsy time and the peeps are slightly nicer :)
Thanks for the advice about where to go etc... I do remember ending up in a place full of dicks dressed like dicks, westend maybe? :\
 
Sauchiehall Street is where you'll see 12 guys in matching white shirts. Dressed smart/casual. Spewing & fighting at kick out time. Places that don't let you in with trainers on, even if you look like you're the type of cunt whose there purely to put a pint glass in someone's face at the end of the night.

If you want to avoid neds (& hen nights, stag nights, cunts that only go out once a year etc) in the city centre, avoid Sauchiehall Street. It is the main/busiest part of the city centre but go just a few streets down & you'll find much better boozers with better tunes & better atmosphere.
 
If you choose wisely in Sauchiehall Street, it's fine. There are loads worse (as in bigger, neddier pubs) in Glasgow than you'll find there: Madness, some of the chain places, etc.
 
If you choose wisely in Sauchiehall Street, it's fine. There are loads worse (as in bigger, neddier pubs) in Glasgow than you'll find there: Madness, some of the chain places, etc.

Such as? I'm struggling to think of anywhere.

There definitely are worse places, but not all up the same big street. 3am on Sauchiehall Street is utter carnage.
 
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crackhead explained pizza crunch to me once.

It's a pizza. In batter.
 
Do you not get pizza crunch? You're missing out.

Aye it's a battered & deep fried pizza. Fucking disgusting when you think about it, but it tastes good.


Edit - King Rib. Now there's a manky invention. Fuck knows what that thing is made of.

Edit again - The deep fried mars bar thing is a bit of a self fulfilling myth btw. One chippy somewhere did it for a laugh, then a newspaper ran with the story as if it was standard practice. Now, because of that, it is in some places. I've still never had one, or even actually seen one.
 
Such as? I'm struggling to think of anywhere.

There definitely are worse places, but not all up the same big street. 3am on Sauchiehall Street is utter carnage.

Nice n Sleazy's.. erm... erm. The Art School. Sure there are a few okay pubs, but I'm not good with names.
 
Do you not get pizza crunch? You're missing out.

Aye it's a battered & deep fried pizza. Fucking disgusting when you think about it, but it tastes good.


Edit - King Rib. Now there's a manky invention. Fuck knows what that thing is made of.

Edit again - The deep fried mars bar thing is a bit of a self fulfilling myth btw. One chippy somewhere did it for a laugh, then a newspaper ran with the story as if it was standard practice. Now, because of that, it is in some places. I've still never had one, or even actually seen one.

I used to be partial to a deep fried Haggis supper. Not so much nowadays, as it was mostly on the walk home after a booze. The battered cheeseburgers are the worst, without doubt. Manky rubber cheese inside.
 
Fuckin hell. That sounds rough. I've had a battered burger before but never a cheeseburger.

But then round your way they shout that "salt n sauce" patter. A girl I know has recently moved to Glasgow from Edinburgh, she was distraught to find out that in Glasgow you apparently don't get "sauce" in the chippy. No pal, it's just that you get a choice of tomato sauce or brown sauce, not just salt & brown sauce watered down to fuck with vinegar.
 
Edit - King Rib. Now there's a manky invention. Fuck knows what that thing is made of.

Jesus I saw the menu and thought that was something that looked vaguely palatable, assumed it was just a "chinese BBQ style" rib of pork or something.

edit>>>

The battered cheeseburgers are the worst, without doubt. Manky rubber cheese inside.

so its a cheeseburger in a fucking bun then battered whole? Fucking hilarious that the worst criticism you can give it is the rubber cheese.

And crackhead, how is a battered burger okay, but a battered cheeseburger is stinking?
 
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No idea what it actually is. There's no bones in there. Just a mash up of mystery meat.

Chippies in England are weird. Most of the ones I've been in seem to be Chinese takeaways as well. At least ours are just mocket.

fucking great photo =D even down to the broken polystyrene box.

Nice to see they pay attention to the presentation though and the sauce is carefully piped onto the "rib".

I also thought the king rib would be one of the few things not to be in batter.

EDIT>>>>>is it like Spam, luncheon meat, dilutie meat or whatever you call Spam up there?
 
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Everything on that menu bar the chips & the pies are in batter. The pies are still deep fried though. Deep fried steak pie mmmmmmmmm =D

Edit - The fried pizza, as oppose to the pizza crunch isn't battered either. They're worse than a pizza crunch though, the lack of batter means it really soaks up the grease. Proper heart attack material.

I only really eat fish suppers out the chippy, you cannae complain at a fish supper. Sometimes the occasional quarter pizza crunch as a quick snack but you can feel it killing you with every bite.
 
the pies are deep fried? i dunno why I'm even surprised, i'd just never have thought anyone would think thats a sensible way to cook a pie.

So, in your opinion, the pizza crunch might be the healthy option on that menu?
 
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