The Existential Pain of Being Young, White, and Affluent

[chugs]

One man's troubles are another's pleasure. I don't accept the narrative that existential pain is the cause of white middle class addiction. Its lazy and not grounded whatsoever in empirical studies.

We already know what causes drug addiction. Its not because we're scared of existences, its, duh, caused by how our brains develop. You have no "choice" whether you will be or not be addicted.

Drug addiction correlates with those who suffered damage in the pre and post natel stages of their life. One key cause of this damage is stress. Science measures the level's of stress through the presences of corticosterone. it doesn't matter how you were stressed, whether your a upper crust 1%, middle class or below the poverty line, it simply mattered that during these critical developmental stages in your live that you were exposed to high levels of stress hormones.

To suggest that middle class people suffer no sustained periods of stress in their lives is a lie, especially prior, during and post childbirth. Having kids is a major financial and emotional event for the vast majority of people.

In any case the pre/post natal damage caused by the stress hormones results in you being primed, susceptible to drug abuse and addiction later on in life.

My understanding is this. The levels of corticosterone and other hormones affects the quantity and uptake of neurotransmitters, namely dopamine and serotonin. Dopamine especially plays a massive role in focus and attention. Lacking dopamine will generally result in behaviours illustrated by ADHD hence the treatment of adderall to raise dopamine levels.

For opiates a scientist, Dr Mark Hutchinson from University of Adelaide investigated for the first time ever how for opioid reinforcement occurs, and in doing so discovered a treatment (already on trial) that reduces significantly opiates withdrawals and tolerance by treating the inflammation neurotransmitters in the brain.

In any case the cause of the addiction, opiate or otherwise, has been in turn matched back to those who's brains have developed in subtle ways different to those who aren't addicted to drugs. That development as I've explained is affected greatly by stress. I read much about this from a Dr Gabor Maté who has a wonderful succinct story about how stress is transferred and how it affects the formation of an infant.

my case occurred as a Jewish infant under Nazi occupation in the ghetto of Budapest. And the day after the pediatrician — sorry, the day after the Nazis marched into Budapest in March of 1944, my mother called the pediatrician and says, “Would you please come and see my son, because he’s crying all the time?” And the pediatrician says, “Of course I’ll come. But I should tell you, all my Jewish babies are crying.”

Now infants don’t know anything about Nazis and genocide or war or Hitler. They’re picking up on the stresses of their parents. And, of course, my mother was an intensely stressed person, her husband being away in forced labor, her parents shortly thereafter being departed and killed in Auschwitz. Under those conditions, I don’t have the kind of conditions that I need for the proper development of my brain circuits. And particularly, how does an infant deal with that much stress? By tuning it out. That’s the only way the brain can deal with it. And when you do that, that becomes programmed into the brain.

And so, if you look at the preponderance of ADD in North America now and the three millions of kids in the States that are on stimulant medication and the half-a-million who are on anti-psychotics, what they’re really exhibiting is the effects of extreme stress, increasing stress in our society, on the parenting environment. Not bad parenting. Extremely stressed parenting, because of social and economic conditions. And that’s why we’re seeing such a preponderance.

So, in my case, that also set up this sense of never being soothed, of never having enough, because I was a starving infant. And that means, all my life, I have this propensity to soothe myself. How do I do that? Well, one way is to work a lot and to gets lots of admiration and lots of respect and people wanting me. If you get the impression early in life that the world doesn’t want you, then you’re going to make yourself wanted and indispensable. And people do that through work. I did it through being a medical doctor. I also have this propensity to soothe myself through shopping, especially when I’m stressed, and I happen to shop for classical compact music. But it goes back to this insatiable need of the infant who is not soothed, and they have to develop, or their brain develop, these self-soothing strategies.

So with that said, we know the cause of addiction. We know its not an expression of free will, of lazy individuals who just want to get high and escape reality. Its a complex problem beset by our development and genetics. That governments can imprison people, treat addicts like second class citizens and withhold substances that will make marked changes to quality of their life, althewhilst creating a system that enriches the cartels and mafia is utterly disgusting.

Worse is this disinformation and misinformation that is allowed to propagate the belief to a gullible public that white middle class guilt and existentialism is driving drug abuse.

For further reading:

Dr Gabor Maté - In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts? (the interview is great)

Dr Mark Hutchinson - Opioid Activation of Toll-Like Receptor 4 Contributes to Drug Reinforcement

For the simple version see - http://www.adelaide.edu.au/news/news55261.html & http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LTd91tYoqBM&feature=youtu.be

 

[Thorns Have Roses]

I think everyone's just throwing around a whole bunch of words. Life is painful, and some folks seek chemical solace. The article only really notes that pharmaceutical opiates are the drug of choice for this particular demographic.

 

[tamarinds]

Fuck opiates

 

[34-dihydroxyphen]

i'd say i grew up low-middle class (while being surrounded by filthy rich kids) then my family made more money later on in my life but really i was on my own for those times and didn't have parents pay for my education unlike my friends, had to work hard, unlike my friends and in the real world, have difficulty finding decent work because i don't have their connections or rich daddies to hand me jobs. So in that sense i am bitter and have always had bitterness towards the people who had everything given to them. If i grew up like them i'd probably hate poor people, we are pitted against each other, you can see that in people who are from 'old money' do not accept people from 'new money' into their social circles. I could make billions but i'm not going to be one of them, ever.

i'm not really filled with hate for those capitalist offspring pieces of shit; i just find it funny that they have succumbed to the very problems their capitalist forefathers created ie. alienation. Now that their lives are complete (financially), they find they are not whole and turn to opiates to fill that void. Well good for them, i did the same, but i still have to laugh at their existential pain and how it's so fucking bad for them, we all feel that pain and a great deal of it was caused by the 'owners of the means of production', capitalism and the society their rich ancestors created. Things that the ruling class believe are virtues of their lives and now that they feel the pain that the less fortunate have, they end up the same way, but the poor have an advantage because we've been there already and know this shit inside and out.

if you came from 'new money' created by innovation and intelligence then fine but if you're one of those old money bitches, i have no sympathy for you when it comes to your existential pain, hope it hurts.

Well, a lot of those kids are in the same boat as you. I grew up, at different times, both inner-city poor and what some people (not myself) would deem rich. A lot of the pain in the age group is due to the changing economic times, where kids who grew up in upper middle class homes look around them and do not see the same opportunities their parents had. If you aren't super rich in this world (like top 1% rich), then you are, at this point, getting poorer. This is tough on upper middle class kids with high expectations placed on them, particularly those within the 1984-1990 range, who grew up at a time when opportunity was available to them, only to have it snatched away basically as soon as they reached adulthood.

 

[shimazu]

My parents arent poor or rich but they look at their fucking financial statements

this has nothing to do with money, it has to do with the parents being idiots and not wanting to believe their son is an addict.

Anyone who hates on people from wealthier upbringings is just jealous, plain and simple.

You make fun of them for having materialistic things, yet if someone gave you 1,000,000 dollars what would you go buy right away?

A fucking savings bond? doubtful

more like a new car, house, drugs, clothes, etc

so unless you have a legit reason to hate on someone better off than you stfu and blame your own parents not the other kid who was only born into what God chose for him

if everyone spent less time bitching about how everyone else is getting poorer and just focused on themselves we wouldnt even be having these discussions

mind your own fucking business and worry about your own credit, and if you are truly intelligent you will be fine.

if you aren't then there's all sorts of programs to help you out

 

[severely etarded]

if someone gave you 1,000,000 dollars what would you go buy right away?

3 oz of the finest, sparkliest, stinkiest yayo, 1000 Oxy IR 30's, 1 oz crystal meth, 5 lbs of the finest buds on the planet, a few $5,000 bottles of liquor, LSD, Shrooms, ketamine, 2CB, a pound of MDMA, another pound of MDA

Money well spent :D

 

[greywoodfoxhall]

What Generation are We?

Well, a lot of those kids are in the same boat as you. I grew up, at different times, both inner-city poor and what some people (not myself) would deem rich. A lot of the pain in the age group is due to the changing economic times, where kids who grew up in upper middle class homes look around them and do not see the same opportunities their parents had. If you aren't super rich in this world (like top 1% rich), then you are, at this point, getting poorer. This is tough on upper middle class kids with high expectations placed on them, particularly those within the 1984-1990 range, who grew up at a time when opportunity was available to them, only to have it snatched away basically as soon as they reached adulthood.

As part of this demographic, I know exactly what you speak of. People say we're 'Generation Y', as 'Y' comes after 'X' and our generation is often left asking "Why?" But, I find 'Generation Rx' is much more fitting. I was supposed to be a legacy at the Air Force Academy, but I tried pot, and realized I'd been lied to about drugs. But, before pot, I got promethazine after shattering my maxillary ridge (bone in between your nose and teeth that holds your teeth in place) and snorting it in the bathroom at the private christian "WASP-nest" private school i was forced to go to made me feel cool like the rappers I listened to at the time. The song "Oxycotton" came out, and my friend got a bunch after burning his legs severely. We ate what in retrospect where Percocets and an OC or two and went downtown. I turned to him and said, "You could walk into traffic right now, and get hit, and I'd run out saying, 'Don't worry, he'll be okay, everything is cool.' I don't want you to get hit by a car, and logically I know it would not be okay, but I FEEL like anything/everything is cool right now." He understood what I meant and concurred. We decided we'd take more of the small pills next time and two of the big ones (luckily, we never did, we didn't understand the big ones were weaker, not stronger than the small ones).

I suffer from horrible depression, and have since middle-school with a brief break in 8th grade and then my senior year... I broke my arm horribly at the skate park and got put on 3 Percocet 5s a day. I felt incredible. Allergic to SSRIs (deathly allergic), my meds had been constantly changed since I was 15 till just recently actually (I take Remeron and surprise, thanks to back pain and RLS, get oxymorphone IR)... but I had a respite on those Percocets that led me down a path of self-medicating for a long time, seeking that relief. I would just sit, talking to my mom, and enjoying it (I was a horribly moody teenager). I got a girlfriend, a really hot one too... head freshman cheerleader. Those Percocets and then the Loratabs I got all through the fall of my senior year in high-school gave me a will to live. I ended up attempting suicide the next fall though, 3 days before I was off to college on an academic scholarship with the goal of becoming a research pharmacist (so I had access to narcotics). I went to rehab at my ex-girlfriend and parents' urging where I learned I could do drugs every day and not just on the weekends without being injured and so I left thinking more like an addict than when I arrived. My parents admitted that it was the worst mistake they ever made a year or two back. So, I came home and went to self-medicating hard. Now, I'm done, thankful almost for the ailments that qualify me for my oxymorphone as it gives me a reason to want to live.

Yeah, I still dabble, but I'm on probation, and the pain clinic drug tests... so it's not worth it. I wish I had gone to school like I was supposed to, but then I realize... there are a lot of people my age who did the "right thing" and are living in their parents' basements, hoping for a shitty minimum wage job just like me. I grew up when the big tobacco lawsuits were occurring and lawyers fresh out of school made $100,000 a year without having to look for a job, they were just handed out almost (why I wanted to go to the AFA... get paid to go to school and become a JAG (military lawyer), do my 5 years in the Air Force behind a desk as a JAG, get out, get an awesome job, get a trophy-wife, trade her in for a new 20 year-old one after 15 years, and just be a f'ing WASP... I literally wrote all that in an English paper about my life goals as a sophomore; right before I smoked weed the first time). There are no big lawsuits anymore. Jobs aren't handed out. Only thing handed out are food-stamps. I'm lucky in that due to my experiences, I don't want money... I want to be able to afford my pills, feed myself, and have a place to stay; but I don't look at people and covet what they have. I imagine how horrific it must be if you do though. It must be so depressing... and so we all do drugs. Generation Rx...

 

[slimvictor]

3 oz of the finest, sparkliest, stinkiest yayo, 1000 Oxy IR 30's, 1 oz crystal meth, 5 lbs of the finest buds on the planet, a few $5,000 bottles of liquor, LSD, Shrooms, ketamine, 2CB, a pound of MDMA, another pound of MDA

Money well spent :D

This made me laugh:D
But seriously, I would buy some around-the-world air tickets and quit my (enjoyable) job.
No job is better than an enjoyable job, after all.
I would spend months wandering in every country I have ever wanted to see, but not yet been able.
India, Nepal, Senegal, Spain, Peru...

 

[slimvictor]

As part of this demographic, I know exactly what you speak of. People say we're 'Generation Y', as 'Y' comes after 'X' and our generation is often left asking "Why?" But, I find 'Generation Rx' is much more fitting. I was supposed to be a legacy at the Air Force Academy, but I tried pot, and realized I'd been lied to about drugs. But, before pot, I got promethazine after shattering my maxillary ridge (bone in between your nose and teeth that holds your teeth in place) and snorting it in the bathroom at the private christian "WASP-nest" private school i was forced to go to made me feel cool like the rappers I listened to at the time. The song "Oxycotton" came out, and my friend got a bunch after burning his legs severely. We ate what in retrospect where Percocets and an OC or two and went downtown. I turned to him and said, "You could walk into traffic right now, and get hit, and I'd run out saying, 'Don't worry, he'll be okay, everything is cool.' I don't want you to get hit by a car, and logically I know it would not be okay, but I FEEL like anything/everything is cool right now." He understood what I meant and concurred. We decided we'd take more of the small pills next time and two of the big ones (luckily, we never did, we didn't understand the big ones were weaker, not stronger than the small ones). I suffer from horrible depression, and have since middle-school with a brief break in 8th grade and then my senior year... I broke my arm horribly at the skate park and got put on 3 Percocet 5s a day. I felt incredible. Allergic to SSRIs (deathly allergic), my meds had been constantly changed since I was 15 till just recently actually (I take Remeron and surprise, thanks to back pain and RLS, get oxymorphone IR)... but I had a respite on those Percocets that led me down a path of self-medicating for a long time, seeking that relief. I would just sit, talking to my mom, and enjoying it (I was a horribly moody teenager). I got a girlfriend, a really hot one too... head freshman cheerleader. Those Percocets and then the Loratabs I got all through the fall of my senior year in high-school gave me a will to live. I ended up attempting suicide the next fall though, 3 days before I was off to college on an academic scholarship with the goal of becoming a research pharmacist (so I had access to narcotics). I went to rehab at my ex-girlfriend and parents' urging where I learned I could do drugs every day and not just on the weekends without being injured and so I left thinking more like an addict than when I arrived. My parents admitted that it was the worst mistake they ever made a year or two back. So, I came home and went to self-medicating hard. Now, I'm done, thankful almost for the ailments that qualify me for my oxymorphone as it gives me a reason to want to live. Yeah, I still dabble, but I'm on probation, and the pain clinic drug tests... so it's not worth it. I wish I had gone to school like I was supposed to, but then I realize... there are a lot of people my age who did the "right thing" and are living in their parents' basements, hoping for a shitty minimum wage job just like me. I grew up when the big tobacco lawsuits were occurring and lawyers fresh out of school made $100,000 a year without having to look for a job, they were just handed out almost (why I wanted to go to the AFA... get paid to go to school and become a JAG (military lawyer), do my 5 years in the Air Force behind a desk as a JAG, get out, get an awesome job, get a trophy-wife, trade her in for a new 20 year-old one after 15 years, and just be a f'ing WASP... I literally wrote all that in an English paper about my life goals as a sophomore; right before I smoked weed the first time). There are no big lawsuits anymore. Jobs aren't handed out. Only thing handed out are food-stamps. I'm lucky in that due to my experiences, I don't want money... I want to be able to afford my pills, feed myself, and have a place to stay; but I don't look at people and covet what they have. I imagine how horrific it must be if you do though. It must be so depressing... and so we all do drugs. Generation Rx...

This is an interesting story, and thanks for sharing it.
However, you might want to think about making it into a blog entry. With some paragraphs, it would be easier to read, as well.

 

[webbykevin]

blame your own parents not the other kid who was only born into what God chose for him

Are you fucking serious ???

 

[greywoodfoxhall]

my bad...

This is an interesting story, and thanks for sharing it.
However, you might want to think about making it into a blog entry. With some paragraphs, it would be easier to read, as well.

I tend to ramble. You're right. I'm still learning the ropes around here and had no idea we had a blog. Do you have to be a Bluelighter to access it? Ah. You do. Hence, I had no idea it existed.

 

[severely etarded]

I tend to ramble. You're right. I'm still learning the ropes around here and had no idea we had a blog. Do you have to be a Bluelighter to access it? Ah. You do. Hence, I had no idea it existed.

it's a nice post imo, could use a little paragraphing, but a nice post. definitely +1 toward bluelighter status.

 

[slimvictor]

^ agreed

 

[Te0X2t]

getting angry at someone else's good fortune because they're parents were successful and wanted them to have nice things is so fucking petty. i hate that shit. i grew up "privileged" and i cant stand it when people get mad at me because my father worked his ass off and wanted his kids to experience the fruits of his labor.

if you want to get mad at someone get mad at your parents for not having the same drive, opportunities and/or ambition.

I'm a white male and my father had come from a rich white town, we lived in a not so shabby place, newark nj.... although its getting better it's no Beverly hills. My father worked his ass off and so did my mother, sometimes the economy decides the fate. So please don't say "WE" as in people who haven't been spoiled from birth should be mad at our parents but, mad at the rich stock holders that thought it was fun to try and make some extra money in 2009-now by completely fucking the stock market and everyone who depended on it.fun isnt the right word, beneficial.

 

[bingey]

At least he wasn't stealing the calc books.

been there .. done that.



Besides I think people should stop acting as if prescription drug abuse is something new. Originally opiates were over the counter-drugs (including heroin) but as soon as drug laws were called into existence (harrison act etc.) it spawned 2 "new" issues : prescription drug abuse and the illicit supply of the formerly otc drugs.

 

[One Thousand Words]

You make what you want from your life, including excuses. Rich or poor parents, if you lack a work ethic then you will be left behind. I loved the kids from this article,by paying their tuition and failing subject after subject, it made it easier for me to reach the top. Moderation, particularly when using drugs is possible, you need to know when is the right time to work and put in an effort. I have always believed in work hard, play hard.

A degree is not a guarantee of a good job. You are one of millions coming out with the same piece of paper. I went to university, always made my 8am lecture no matter how hung over, always handed assignments on time and never failed a subject. I work a great job and have a comfortable life because of the hard work I put in back then. My brother left school and started spray painting trucks and being a general dog's body for a mining equipment company and now he sits in a big office in Jakarta with a house keeper and a chauffeur. Neither of us expected or received a hand out from our parents or the government. The best thing we ever received growing up was the importance of a god work ethic and self respect. It is not where you come from but rather the drive you have to get where you want. By all means cry about things you don't have and dull the pain with pills you don't need but don't expect the rest of us to wait for you.

 

[Scottadone]

Wow, I literally just had a similar conversation with a buddy of mine, considering I almost fall into that category, for everything but the rich part, I was just bare middle class. But that still didn't stop me from every white boy's inital favourite, oxycontin.

To summarize, I hypothesize that often people who are too sheltered and too well off, are likely to enter a drug addiction because they are too inexperienced to the concequences as they've only heard about them, and clearly that didn't stop me either. I was a very bright kid, finished the 2nd highest marks in my elementary school, but i think if my parents were junkies, I would have been smart enough to not use drugs. But because I didn't know first hand,I had to see and experience it for myself.

Just my theory.

 

[Ninae]

On the one hand, it's good to remember that not even the most idyllic childhood in the richest neighborhood can protect one from the pain of sentient existence. On the other hand, asking ordinary people who lack a lot of what they need to sympathize with the pain of someone who had it all is a pretty hard sell.

From a realist perspective, this is a pretty good case study for why shielding your children from all hardship is doing them no favors. Those parents who say "I want my children to have it better than I did" or "I don't want my children to suffer as I did", had better take a long hard look at how the hardships they endured made them the people they are today, both for better and for worse.

Exposing your children to "the right kind of hardship", which builds character but doesn't cripple them, is a tough balancing act, especially in a society that abounds in quick fixes that money can buy.

I agree. My idyllic, paradisical (not rich, but adequate, and ideal in an emotional sense) childhood, is when I think about it, one of the main things that drew me to drug-use in the first place. I just wasn't prepared for all the harships of the adult world. How there isn't perfect harmony and love between people and men/women like between parents and young children, etc.

Being young, white, and having what you need materially doesn't even touch it. And I can't imagine being male is of any help - on the contrary males are more daring and willing to take risks, probably why majority of drug-addicts are male. The drug-world is a tough and dangerous place.

And obviously material things matter little to many when they choose drugs in front of it, rather than having anything they could want materially.

I think this is also connected to Western culture developing more spiritual values and focusing more on inner happiness (as we have kind of mastered the material aspect of things) or is a negative effect of it. "Money doesn't buy you happiness", etc. and that kind of philosophy can definitely be interpreted that the euphoric emotional states induced by drugs has more value than material things.

It's also not really easy to argue that it doesn't - I would personally rather have a happy day than a shiny, new possession.

 

[EFC18]

Here's my take on this: the general implications that reports of such cases tend to make is - other than the general war on drugs message, that the evil of drugs can strike anywhere, and your children are ever at risk and so thus you must ever be vigilant or it'll be mostly your fault when your little angel ends up syringe-ridden in then nearest gutter.

Aside from the usual diatribe, though, the angle I inferred they were going for was: well, just what is wrong with society today? Has middle America lost its way? Are we out of touch with the younger generation? Are prescription medicines to blame? I think they are viewing it entirely the wrong way - trying to decipher just how tortured today's poor young souls truly are in order for them to become homeless addicts, rather than seeing quite clearly the link between affluence, utility and maximum potential for use.

Drugs are appealing to a lot of people not as some kind of chemical escapism for the perennially downtrodden but as a means of, quite simply, hedonistic indulgence. They are enjoyable. And what group not only indulges itself excessively but can afford to do so? Why, students of course: particularly those fresh out of home with student loans whose interest-laden repayments are nothing more than a distant concept and, at a bare minimum, would be expected for a few hours of classes a week.

 

[Utahrd]

yeah i hope those young white affluent males really feel that existential pain that their rich ancestors brought about in the first place. I think the world will be a better place with these pieces of shit addicted to pain meds rather than being competitive in our fucked up society. sorry i'm rooting for the underdog junkie who grew up with nothing and still keeps their shit together as opposed to their rich junkie counterparts who should inevitably fail.

"robo tripping" if thats not a filthy, cheap worthless ghetto-ass drug I don't know what is. oh, and sorry.