Oh yes, I don't dearly love any of the chicks I'm sexual with at all and none of them are for me different than any other arbitrary person would be.
No need to take it personally because it wasn't meant that way at all. I'm aware that a man can have just as much, if not more, heart in his sexuality as a woman and that this is more of a high-consciousness quality than a female one.
I was just generalising, and when it comes to the average person females TEND to be more emotional in their sexuality and seek it out for love and intimacy more so than males, IN GENERAL. Not commenting on the many exceptions but just the general trend. i.e. it's not as common to hear girls complain about romantic sex being boring and that it's supposed to be more like porn, etc.
Anyway, I like your comments and find them encouraging - good example of how it's also possible for men to experience sexuality more on the emotional/spiritual level, even if many will say "I have no idea what you're talking about and have no experience with that at all", and many reading this actually won't. I should know, as I've had enough talks with males about it that have made them look like giant question marks.
It's actually quite confusing having to relate to men when they can be so different and you pretty much have to be prepared for anything. Some men's sexuality seems to have been completely formed by porn, while other's are not that dissimilar from my own, and it can be a completely different world depending who you get with. While men, I don't feel, aren't very clear about this. Typically they are very into their own sexuality and tend to assume everyone else are the same way and it's the only way that's right. It's quite funny because they're all so self-assured about it when their opinions can wary wildly.
I don't even mean it in a disrespectful way as I think everyone has the right to their own sexuality and it's not that much of a choice, but like most I look for someone reasonably compatible, if possible.
Yes, why in the hell would I want to be at all emotionally intimate with people who are a big part of my life and who I admire as human beings?
LOL. Believe it or not, but some men are so consumed by lust they prefer to keep things like "emotional intimacy" out of their sexlife. Many are just of the opinion that they can get enough of it OUTSIDE of their sexual life, that it has no place within it, and just gets in the way of their own sexual satisfaction. Might be disappointing for you to find if it's one of the main things you're looking for, but hey, welcome to the world. This is possible as the state of mind of someone who just wants to use someone's body for physical satisfaction can be a million miles apart from the state of mind of someone who wants to use their sexuality as a means of powerfully connecting with someone and having a real experience of love.
Factor out the men who are too old/young/gay/unappealing for some overt reason, and the sample you're left with is probably not THAT overwhelmingly huge, selecting at random from that pool would still almost certainally wind up with some women paired with their ideal man.
I agree it's possible to fall for someone you're sexually uncompatible with, as these things aren't really controlled that way, just that if you had the choice you wouldn't ideally choose them for a partner. But in some cases you might just have to meet halfway, make a compromise, and make the best of it. This seems to be a pretty common scenario, especially between men and women. It sometimes seems to me like everyone are complaining about their sexlife making me wish they'd just do something a bit more constructive about it.
Because, homosexuals have ZERO empathy or love for each other and have no desire to, nor do they enjoy, giving pleasure to their partner.
Come on, that has nothing to do with what I was trying to say. I was trying to make the point how some male/female couples have so little sexually in common, and get so little joy out of being with each other and fulfilling each other's needs, they almost might as well be with someone of the same sex when they don't find the same sex attractive or be better off that way. Get it now?
Also, in my experience real empathy in that sense is not all that widespread, and I'm not going to say it's all the same just to be democratic - because it's actually hard to find. If it was more common you wouldn't hear so many complain about not getting their needs met as they would be too busy talking about how much they enjoy fulfilling someone else's.
Please clarify masculine vs feminine type sexuality. I have found that the girls I have been with, well, the function f(sexuality)=rangrzs/girls is everywhere continuous yet nowhere differentiable from my own?
Oh dear. You obviously didn't stop to give it much thought because there are so many differences I could never list them all in one go. Or are you really trying to argue that men and women are sexually identical? In a way it's more like we're mirror images or opposites of each other when it comes to these things.
Just to give a few typical examples - men want more sex, men want sooner sex, men want more physical sex, men are the sexual predators while women are the victims, men often pretend to be in love just so they can get sex, making new conquests raises a man's status while it lowers a woman's, etc. etc. I could go on endlessly and these differences are what lead to many of the conflicts and create much disharmony in the sexual relationship between men and women. No, not in every single individual case, there are exceptions everywhere, but as a general trend it's something most would recognise. And it's not about what is right, or whatever, just differences we tend to run into that create problems.
I'm not even trying to make an argument when it comes to these points, as I think they're pretty self-evident, or claim that one sex is more right or superior to the other. I'm trying to be fair and simply say the many sexual differences between men and women present us with many challenges and there's a need to find ways to deal with them more constructively. Or find ways to collaborate and support each other, instead of fighting each other, to turn it into something more positive. At least that's my opinion. Might sound easy enough in theory, but seems difficult for most to carry out in practice.
