Finally admitted to my doctor I have a problem with H, now what?

[xburtonchic]

I hope I'm not out of line for saying this here. It doesn't sound to me like you are done yet. You have a strong romance with drugs, of all kinds, it seems. I, myself, am in a LTR with H, and couldn't quit if I wanted to.

Don't get me wrong, I wish you well, I hope everything works as planned, and you come out whole and content. I wish everyone could. But life just doesn't work that way.

I HAD a strong romance with H... not drugs of all kinds. Anyone will tell you that H was my only issue.

Regardless, I'm back and happy to have proven you wrong. 14 days clean today

 

[xburtonchic]

J.D I feel what your saying. Its a viscious cycle.


3 months of heroin and already in Rehab/Detox

This is just the begginning I hate to say. I pray the best for this person though!! I hope to God they get it the first time, but if we go by numbers, theyve got a better chance hitting the lottery.

Ever stop to think that it was only three months because I CHOSE to go into detox? Nobody forced me there. I took a good look at what my life would have been like a few years down the road and didn't like it, so I decided to do something about it.

Just because you guys can't/took a long time to quit, doesn't mean I have to go the same route. It doesn't mean anybody else has to either. Everyone is different. And C.H puts faith in me because he's one of my best friends in real life. I'd do the same for him.

So much negativity around here...

Still two weeks clean and not planning on going back...

 

[cj]

Congrats Xburtonchic getting clean is t=hard work. The cynicism around here is because its always the same story just different user names and frankly it rarely ends with anyone stating completely clean for very long. I pray you are the exception. either way wht your doing is awsome and shows that you have a lot of self control and audacity so i aplaud you and a hope it lasts.

 

[xburtonchic]

Thank you crimsonjunk

I have 21 days sober today from ALL opiates; I just thought I would share. It's a great feeling to be free. I can't imagine why I would ever go back and intentionally enslave myself again, but you're right, it's always the same story and no one is immune to a hardcore relapse. I will say this much though: I think I'd rather detox a million times than deal with PAWS for even one day... that's the hard part. But I have a little trick that I do when the PAWS gets really bad and I start to consider going out and using, and it's working well so far.

 

[Swimmingdancer]

Glad to hear you are doing so great!
What is the trick that you do?
I have been using this method: http://www.bluelight.ru/vb/threads/...-to-quit-addictions-and-improve-mental-health

 

[xburtonchic]

It's a personal variation of something I learned in detox: that with every craving, there is a small window of time in which you have a choice on how you're going to react. So I take advantage of that little window of time and in my head, I create a little timeline of my life. First I picture what my life will most likely look like in ten years if I choose to go out and get a fix. And then I picture what it will be like if I choose to stay put and just do something else to distract myself until the craving passes. Usually something to help that second vision come true, like work on my resume or apply for jobs or whatever. It's pretty much a no-brainer after that... still requires a lot of willpower though, which sucks.

I just read your method after writing that, so yep... it's pretty much the same thing you do, just slightly different.

 

[stardust.hero]

It's a personal variation of something I learned in detox: that with every craving, there is a small window of time in which you have a choice on how you're going to react.

I agree with this completely. I also believe that there is a small window where cravings are active when the unreasonable impulse is almost/stronger than you can take. You can make a craving last a few minutes and put it out or you can draw it out for hours until you give in. It's all about how you choose to react to the impulse.

 

[Swimmingdancer]

It's a personal variation of something I learned in detox: that with every craving, there is a small window of time in which you have a choice on how you're going to react. So I take advantage of that little window of time and in my head, I create a little timeline of my life. First I picture what my life will most likely look like in ten years if I choose to go out and get a fix. And then I picture what it will be like if I choose to stay put and just do something else to distract myself until the craving passes. Usually something to help that second vision come true, like work on my resume or apply for jobs or whatever. It's pretty much a no-brainer after that... still requires a lot of willpower though, which sucks.

I just read your method after writing that, so yep... it's pretty much the same thing you do, just slightly different.

I agree with this completely. I also believe that there is a small window where cravings are active when the unreasonable impulse is almost/stronger than you can take. You can make a craving last a few minutes and put it out or you can draw it out for hours until you give in. It's all about how you choose to react to the impulse.

Totally. I think it's all about recognizing those cravings in the first place, instead of just acting on auto-pilot and not really thinking rationally as your fingers dial your dealer's number and your legs walk out the door to go score. We can't control the cravings but we can pay attention to the craving and choose how we react to it, and choose to do something else. Like anything in life beyond our control really, (we do have the ability to choose how we react to it). It is definitely not easy, but it is empowering to realize that we don't have to act on the craving. They seem to lose their power (and get less frequent) as time goes on. I think the hardest times for me is that I will occasionally have a dream about using and then when I wake up I have very intense cravings that seem to last for a long time. Ugh.

 

[xburtonchic]

I agree with the part about cravings getting less intense over time. The longer you're away from the dope/whatever your DOC is, the lifestyle, and the people that accompany it, the more the memories fade and it doesn't seem as important anymore... especially if you are active in building a new, healthier life for yourself. It takes a while, but time (along with some effort) really does heal all wounds when it comes to a person being serious about their sobriety.

Another thing that helps me out a lot is the concept of existentialism. It really kinds of puts things into perspective and makes you realize how small you are. And if you can learn to accept that at your core, you're really only a bunch of neurons and electrons and shit firing off, it makes it easier to accept that there are certain things you can't control and you just have to let go of. There are only a very small number of things we have control over in this life, and whether or not you make those choices count is completely up to you...