• S E X
    L O V E +
    R E L A T I O N S H I P S


    ❤️ Welcome Guest! ❤️


    Posting Guidelines Bluelight Rules
  • SLR Moderators: Senior Staff

why did he ask for my number and not call? is he just not into me?

Status
Not open for further replies.
mrs_mia_wallace

mrs_mia_wallace

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 9, 2009
Messages
2,396
Location
London
Last Friday night I went out with my friend, got pretty drunk and went home with a very cute guy that I really hit it off with. We talked for quite a while before going to his bed and hooking up.... we started to have sex but he couldn't get it up (alcohol) and after a bit he was able to, but we only had sex for like 30 seconds before I stopped it. Then we talked some more and went to sleep.

The next morning he drove me back to my car and asked me to text my number to his phone since his phone was dead. The usual "it was fun" blah blah, a hug, and we parted ways.

It's now Tuesday and I haven't heard from him at all. I thought it went really well, but does this mean he's just not that into me? I have honestly NEVER had a one night stand in my life (don't know what the FUCK I was thinking, I deeply regret it) and I don't really know what to think.
 
Why did you stop him after 30sec. Honestly if I was having sex with a girl, and she stops me after 30 sec, I would get pissed at the girl and not call her either.
 
shahab6 said:
Why did you stop him after 30sec. Honestly if I was having sex with a girl, and she stops me after 30 sec, I would get pissed at the girl and not call her either.
Click to expand...

Because I knew I would feel like this three days later. I feel digusting enough having NOT had full on sex with him. Thank god I had the presence of mind to stop it.

He didn't see super annoyed tho to be honest, he was really having problems I think it might have been a relief.
 
mrs_mia_wallace said:
Because I knew I would feel like this three days later. I feel digusting enough having NOT had full on sex with him. Thank god I had the presence of mind to stop it.

He didn't see super annoyed tho to be honest, he was really having problems I think it might have been a relief.[/QUOTE

ok i see then his probably not into you. If he was, he would of called within 2 days. If he really liked you next day. Anything more than 4-5 days, is more to stay in touch in and there.
Click to expand...
 
alasdairm said:
if this is the case, why do you want him to call you?

alasdair
Click to expand...

Why wouldn't I want him to call me? I liked him, I had fun, I want to see him again. I know who I am and I don't sleep with people I'm not dating. I don't judge people who do-- in fact I wish I wasn't so rigid about it, I think I would probably be a happier person if I was comfortable doing that, but I'm not. Casual sex makes me feel dirty and disgusting, I'm OK with making out and maybe a little more, but anything beyond that and I just feel like a whore who let someone use me. Not wanting to have sex had nothing to do with him, it had to do with me.

But I decided what the hell and sent him a text message. He responded in less than five minutes :) so that's a pretty good sign. I talked to one of my girl friends and she said maybe he was embarrassed that he was having problems getting it up or that I didn't enjoy myself because I said I wanted to stop? Men are so damned mysterious.
 
It probably isn't some huge reason, don't get hung up about it. You could ask for a guy's number and then call the guy next time.
 
Men aren't mysterious. They just want one thing. It's women who are mysterious.
 
both men AND women can be mysterious. however, Mystery is the most mysterious out of us all!

NSFW:
mysterypua.jpg


(NSFW for size)
 
He could be embarrassed that he wasn't able to get hard or that you wanted to completely stop having sex once that happened.

Or maybe he picked up on the fact that you felt disgusted about him and having sex with him?
 
We texted back and forth a few times on Wednesday but he didn't ask me out and he hasn't texted me since so I guess that's it. I don't care if you look like Jared Leto, I do not respond to booty call texts and I do not ask boys out.

I think it's bothered me so much this whole week not because he was the man of my dreams but because if he doesn't ask me out or call me then it really was just meaningless sex... and then I really do feel bad about myself. I feel like a Victorian woman (my friend told me recently "you are an 18th century novel") constantly struggling with this morality/biology question of morally I don't believe in having casual sex but biologically I haven't had sex in five months and I want to... I constantly feel like my sexual values do not fit into this world that I am in and in a way they're a contradiction... I'm a progressive feminist but I don't believe in casual sex? Does that mean I don't believe in women being sexually empowered? I really don't know what that means...I think this also just threw me because I've never had someone ask for my number and not call me (that sounds really pompous but it's true).

it's interesting to me though that the idea of texting him never even crossed my mind until someone here suggested it.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top