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  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

How are you in one word? v. 2012

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Drained. Talked to a really good friend about all this today and don't feel like it changed anything, just reinforced.
 
@Red: You're on to something. Work has been nuts lately, and I've been pre-occupied with a couple of big, concrete things that are keeping my attention out of my head. There is certainly good in my life right now, but room for improvement, for sure.

@Kiwi: I remember times like that. I'd have a great, heartfelt talk with a close friend about my troubles, and despite their best efforts I'd just walk away with all my negativity in place, and feeling even worse. Once the negative thoughts get a good enough toehold, it is so hard to get rid of them.

ATM: Peaceful. We're finally getting a bit of snow, and I'm looking forward to taking a nice walk in the newly muted air.
 
okay: lmao I didn't sleep yet but I'm not going to anytime soon... My friends coming over soon so that's going to mean I'm doing some crazy shit soon aha.
 
Shattered
I accidently broke my kids snowglobe while opening the blinds. This led to tears and calamity, everyone was upset stressed. Girlfriend grabed her bag and went, shits been positive then whack... Universe delivers another kick to the groin:?
 
Loved.

Yeah, one of the least likely feelings I thought I was going to be experiencing for a while, but the calls I've recieved and the messages that have been left by my friends recently have been out of this world. I just got a call from two friends that are awesome people, pretty good friends (one I chill with off and on, another who hasn't been around regularly for 2.5 years), but I wasn't expecting the message that was left on my phone. I could help but smile, and hold the words close to my heart. I could hear the true sound of love and appreciation within their voices.

I've for some reason decided since I was a little kid to push away the idea of people seeing me in a positive light, and a strong appreciation for who I really am. This really confirmed to me that people love to be around me. People love the way I talk (I've been kinda self conscious about it), as I have a little lisp and with my ADHD (I feel) I sound goofy. People actually miss my antics when I'm around. I can be a quiet introverted guy, but I'm also a goofy, loud, crazy guy that is a bunch of fun to be around. I'm a solid friend, and every relationship that I've created have shown this recently.

It is honestly bringing tears to my eyes writing this. I feel so happy right now because I have these people in my life. I have to keep moving forward and not give up, because I want nothing more than to keep these relationships alive.

I spent a good part of the day looking for info on pharm tech jobs. I'm going to be certified by taking the exCPT and PTCB exams, and licensed in TX in the next 2 months, so looking into my possibilities for the next 6 months. If my parents will pay for it I might try to see if I can also become certified in compounding or sterile products to help with employment possibilities (hopefully higher salary, more options in places of employment) In the summer I'm going to register to be licensed in NC as a tech and try to find a job there, building myself a legit future for the next couple years. I'd love to get a job at the UNC-CH Hospital as a pharm tech. I have 70+ college credits in the UNC school system (not ch), and its an amazing hospital, so it could be one of the best places for me to aim for. This will also put me a little closer to some good friends, and the possibility to finish my BS in Chem. I feel like I'm really starting to move forward in life. I'm not trying to look too far ahead, just sticking ultimately with my 6-8 month goals (6 month is preferred), but also thinking about my options for the next 18 months.

I'm starting to find the beauty in life again. Who cares about the unfortunate situations in the past couple months, esp about losing that girl from my life. None of that matters, nor will slow me down.
 
SplatChrome said:
Loved.

Yeah, one of the least likely feelings I thought I was going to be experiencing for a while, but the calls I've recieved and the messages that have been left by my friends recently have been out of this world. I just got a call from two friends that are awesome people, pretty good friends (one I chill with off and on, another who hasn't been around regularly for 2.5 years), but I wasn't expecting the message that was left on my phone. I could help but smile, and hold the words close to my heart. I could hear the true sound of love and appreciation within their voices.

I've for some reason decided since I was a little kid to push away the idea of people seeing me in a positive light, and a strong appreciation for who I really am. This really confirmed to me that people love to be around me. People love the way I talk (I've been kinda self conscious about it), as I have a little lisp and with my ADHD (I feel) I sound goofy. People actually miss my antics when I'm around. I can be a quiet introverted guy, but I'm also a goofy, loud, crazy guy that is a bunch of fun to be around. I'm a solid friend, and every relationship that I've created have shown this recently.

It is honestly bringing tears to my eyes writing this. I feel so happy right now because I have these people in my life. I have to keep moving forward and not give up, because I want nothing more than to keep these relationships alive.

I spent a good part of the day looking for info on pharm tech jobs. I'm going to be certified by taking the exCPT and PTCB exams, and licensed in TX in the next 2 months, so looking into my possibilities for the next 6 months. If my parents will pay for it I might try to see if I can also become certified in compounding or sterile products to help with employment possibilities (hopefully higher salary, more options in places of employment) In the summer I'm going to register to be licensed in NC as a tech and try to find a job there, building myself a legit future for the next couple years. I'd love to get a job at the UNC-CH Hospital as a pharm tech. I have 70+ college credits in the UNC school system (not ch), and its an amazing hospital, so it could be one of the best places for me to aim for. This will also put me a little closer to some good friends, and the possibility to finish my BS in Chem. I feel like I'm really starting to move forward in life. I'm not trying to look too far ahead, just sticking ultimately with my 6-8 month goals (6 month is preferred), but also thinking about my options for the next 18 months.

I'm starting to find the beauty in life again. Who cares about the unfortunate situations in the past couple months, esp about losing that girl from my life. None of that matters, nor will slow me down.
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nice ....:)
 
^ snowboarder! Where you been? So good to see your name.:)

@splat--that really is wonderful. Whenever I feel a friend's love like that it makes me realize how important it is for me to give that same level of love and recognition back to my friends. Sometimes we get so wrapped up in our own needs that we forget that everyone needs to be appreciated in that way. If you love someone, tell them. Tell them often and tell them why! <3

so that brings me to: appreciative of all my friends here and in my life outside of BL.
 
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