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Random MSN Gibberings LXXXVIII: Possibly even some shitalin to jazz myself up
- Thread starter jancrow
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Glitched
Bluelight Crew
- Joined
- Jul 18, 2010
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- 592
Meh, I thought my Gash day was quite the idea!! Unlike you Sam to turn down looking at some gash?
Nothing worse than being caught short when you have a turtles head creeping out, you have my sympathy mate. A friend of mine was on his first date with a girl he has now finished with and has to go for a shit. Went into the loo, dropped said log and went to wipe, no bog roll, there was none in any cubicle! The guy always goes commando too so he couldn't just take his pants off, use them and dump them in the bin, no, he did the only thing he could and used the bog brush.... Winner!
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My legendary libido seems to have given me the slip, for now at least.
My favourite season appears to have made an early arrival, it's nearly the end of the week and the sun is bathing everything in the kind of glow I haven't seen since September. Yet I'm far too mired in cynicism to fully appreciate it.
At the risk of being reported for sourcing, does anybody have any joie de vivre going spare?
YellowPolkaDotHalo
Ex-Bluelighter
Ive got a Nic Le Taxi but she comes in a Volvo not a Vauxhall????
Not sure shell drive up to man.. v juicy motor!
Not sure shell drive up to man.. v juicy motor!
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bighouse911
Bluelighter
flying back to england in 4 hours! :D :D :D
TheSpade
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Oct 15, 2005
- Messages
- 37,782
Nightmare. That's manky as fuck. I always try and remember to go out with bog roll on me here as it's rare for toilets to have any and it's near impossible to even find toilets, there are no public toilets, none at stations or in the street, some bars and restaurants don't have any, Maccy Dee's isn't even guaranteed. I was lucky to find one when I so badly needed it, if I'd have had to have waited until I took the boat back across the river then the taxi took us through traffic to the shopping mall (which do have toilets) I'd have shit myself for sure. It was a pure filthy, nasty, sloppy shit as well. God bless immodium it has sorted me right out.
parttime crackhead
Bluelighter
Are you allowed to just openly pish in the streets then? If bars don't have toilets then what the fuck are you meant to do?
I'm trying to motivate myself to get up & clean the house up. My room is a fucking bomb site. Currently belting out some Modeselektor at a very high volume but even that's not getting me moving. I just want to skin up & laze about.
I'm trying to motivate myself to get up & clean the house up. My room is a fucking bomb site. Currently belting out some Modeselektor at a very high volume but even that's not getting me moving. I just want to skin up & laze about.
TheSpade
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Oct 15, 2005
- Messages
- 37,782
Well you could pish in the street I'm sure but if the police caught you then whether it's illegal or not they'd 'fine' you, they fine you for anything here (i.e. dropping litter even though there's no public bins in BKK) and by fine I mean you pay a bribe or get arrested. Probably about 2 quid fine though to be fair, double for a foreigner maybe. Most bars do have toilets especially tourist ones but I've been in a few of the thai places (and I'm talking fairly decent places not skanky dive bars that are popular and fairly expensive) where there's no toilets. I needed a shit in one a few weeks ago but they didn't have a bog so I had to go wandering and find one that did. They might have a bog but no toilet paper or the bog is just a squat toilet with a hose. I haven't mastered those hoses, I just make a mess with them and soak myself then you're sticking your soggy / shitty arse back in your jeans.
Going back to the bribe thing, I was talking to a thai bird yesterday. She was telling me she drives but has no license and that this is normal. If you do something wrong and the police catch you just pay a couple quid and you don't get arrested or any further action. Driving tests consist of driving in a car park not actually on the road. No wonder it's fucking chaos here, no one has actually learned to drive.
Going back to the bribe thing, I was talking to a thai bird yesterday. She was telling me she drives but has no license and that this is normal. If you do something wrong and the police catch you just pay a couple quid and you don't get arrested or any further action. Driving tests consist of driving in a car park not actually on the road. No wonder it's fucking chaos here, no one has actually learned to drive.
YellowPolkaDotHalo
Ex-Bluelighter
water 
StoneHappyMonday said:
hrmn! +5 for erotic fantasy writing ;p .. 'tis appreciated
^^ the above is honestly MarmaladePorn. following that book around the UK sounds like an epic adventure & would pretty much summarise my desire for a slightly less sadistic version of ditching life and embarking on a Natural Born Killers style killing spree full of hedonism and epic romance. I think I'd even be able to ditch my need for sleeping with 6 pillows, and having a hairdryer on hand
StoneHappyMonday said:
eh, on my side note, years ago, I saw tons of em on sale in The Works remainder bargain book shop for £6 quid, and never ever bought a copy, because my ex had one and I thought I'd never need another one. talk about ulcer inducing
on another side note, I bought this Spacemen 3/Spiritualized biog ages ago for £15, and sent it off to a buddy in Texas cause he was an uber fan, before I got to read it. Kinda regretting it now. I always give my decent books away. I hate having good reads wasting away on a shelf, even if I haven't read em. I think it's some kind of mental subconscious, self-flagellation scheme I've developed to actually subconsciously beat myself into reading more, rather than just feeling so ashamed about not doing so
I've considered actually offering to pay for the postage to send n return, just so I can read the bloody thing
Never even had any !!!
London today was almost like summer:-
@Yellow, nah I don't run it, its an industry thing and my employer is a member of a particular organisation, they have lots of rules and regs that are constantly reviewed and discussed. Don't like the train much but it's a day out of the office. I'm off the booze but the blues area different matter I'm afraid !
Glitched
Bluelight Crew
- Joined
- Jul 18, 2010
- Messages
- 592
Where have you been? Probably something I should have picked up already on here but I must have missed it. Hope you've had a good time whatever you have been doing wherever you were.
I know, he really had to scrub hard too and then clean the brush in the bog water as it was the come up shits so slightly runny.... He destroyed the brush and he toilet to be fair!
I feel for you though mate having very few toilets to be able to choose from. On the plus side though when you do get to a toilet the level of relief will be even greater.....
.... I always think of pooing as waiting for a flight. If your flight is delayed you're kept in the departure lounge, it's not very comfortable, you sometimes get a bit of a sweat on and as time goes on you get less and less confident that you can keep the boredom and frustration inside. Then, eventually you can get on the plain, 'flit' is always the same once you're sat in your seat getting numb legs. But the longer ynhave waited, the more relief you feel.
Meh, I always try to delay my flights for the extra feeling of relief when intake off!!!!
Winner!
Shambles
Bluelight Crew
Possibly the most in-depth caught-short-shite discussion I've read yet. The details make it 
As a nipper I once had to resort to my sock during a brief spell staying in a womens' refuge. Was one of those furry flourescent lime-green 80s socks too. Probably the best thing for such things really. Better than wearing them anyway. Lesbians, lentils and no bog roll in the bog is a shitty combo.
Not much of a story but stirred the memory anyway so dutifully shared.
As a nipper I once had to resort to my sock during a brief spell staying in a womens' refuge. Was one of those furry flourescent lime-green 80s socks too. Probably the best thing for such things really. Better than wearing them anyway. Lesbians, lentils and no bog roll in the bog is a shitty combo.
Not much of a story but stirred the memory anyway so dutifully shared.
Shambles
Bluelight Crew
As memories go, I probably have better to be honest. Did surprise me that a strictly women-only (other than their pre-pubescent kids) house lived in total squalor and didn't even provide bogroll though. Drip-dry system I guess.
Shambles
Bluelight Crew
Ha! 
I presume they all did but were tight with the rolls and didn't leave any communal ones. Fuckin' hope so anyway
As for long hair - 90% butch lesbians so not really. As the oldest male resident at the time I probably had more hair than the lot of 'em put together. And in related news - my hair is now officially long enough to wipe my arse with. If I lean back a bit. And am in the mood.
I presume they all did but were tight with the rolls and didn't leave any communal ones. Fuckin' hope so anyway
As for long hair - 90% butch lesbians so not really. As the oldest male resident at the time I probably had more hair than the lot of 'em put together. And in related news - my hair is now officially long enough to wipe my arse with. If I lean back a bit. And am in the mood.
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