TDS Social vs. where Darksiders come to play

[herbavore]

Hi and welcome.:D I just responded to your post about your brother. Stay connected and let us know how everything in your life is going as you get used to the reality of his incarceration. There are lots of wonderful people here, many of whom have been incarcerated, that can give you insight and support.

 

[Dave]

@Red: That's how it's done, usually. The OTC strips just have a weak gel immobilized on a film; the one that I had from my dentist involved getting custom trays made, and had little syringes of minty 12% or so peroxide gel.

The thing with the sensitivity is that our teeth are actually pretty porous IIRC, hence deeper stains. By hitting it with peroxide you're bleaching the stains, but you're also eating away at your enamel within the pores. Or at least that was what I was told... Paging Dr. Busty!

 

[Doomed2pain]

Hi if you ever want to chat pm me



QUOTE=Southern Devil;10249257]Hey guys! My name is becky. I am a freind of Soundsystem00 in real life. I have been watching him operate bluelight for quite some time and had to join. He recommended the dark side because of all the nice people here that can help!

Much love!

PLUR[/QUOTE]

 

[Captain.Heroin]

Hey guys! My name is becky. I am a freind of Soundsystem00 in real life. I have been watching him operate bluelight for quite some time and had to join. He recommended the dark side because of all the nice people here that can help!

Much love!

PLUR

Welcome to Bluelight Becky!!

Soundsystem is a cool BL'er so I'm glad you have cool friends in real life! :D

 

[S.M.F.G]

Been absent for a few pages now, had a lurk....
Thanks to everyone who replied to my post a ways back, Am sorry Ive not been around just goin thru some super stressfull shit, not functioning 100 % (shit not functioning @ 10%8) ) but got it in me to get my ass on here to say hi to all u wonderfull folks.
d2p il see u on MSN one day...
Herby u always got some wise words
So im still here, without a doubt & im hangin tough
Over and out

 

[LSDMDMA&AMP]

anybody ever feel hopelessly lost?
like trapped in a cycle of isolation that has been going on for so long, you dont know how to get out of it?
being completely without a social life, friends, etc. and just not knowing where to start or how to or...
i'm quickly losing faith in me ever having a life like everybody else, losing faith in me ever becoming anything more than a lonely fuckup speedfreak just doing the same thing, over and over again, without finding any happiness in life....
i sometimes wish that my heart would just stop beating one of these days, and never start back up again....it would at least provide closure.

 

[Ixchellian]

Been absent for a few pages now, had a lurk....

Ha! See what you get?

 

[herbavore]

LSD, Splat and S.M.F.G.--I am really sorry to hear that all three of you are going through hard times. S.M.F.G. has it right: hang tough. Sometimes that's the most immediate thing you have to do before you can make the changes you need to make to move through pain.
All my love and care goes out to each of you. No matter how isolated you feel, there are always people that do care.

 

[LSDMDMA&AMP]

More like have been going through hard times for a very long time, but yeah thanks mang
way i figure this out, this problem has been around for a long long time-way before i ever did any drogs, so its not being caused by drogs....

 

[n3ophy7e]

Been absent for a few pages now, had a lurk....
Thanks to everyone who replied to my post a ways back, Am sorry Ive not been around just goin thru some super stressfull shit, not functioning 100 % (shit not functioning @ 10%8) ) but got it in me to get my ass on here to say hi to all u wonderfull folks.

Good to see you in here mate, I hope today is a good day for you

to darksiders. I started cutting myself tonight again, but decided I should open up the darkside instead.

I need a way to get out off here

Splat that is really awesome you were able to stop yourself from cutting, and came on here to distract yourself instead. I'm not sure if you realise quite how strong that was of you to do so
How are you feeling today??

anybody ever feel hopelessly lost?
like trapped in a cycle of isolation that has been going on for so long, you dont know how to get out of it?
being completely without a social life, friends, etc. and just not knowing where to start or how to or...
i'm quickly losing faith in me ever having a life like everybody else, losing faith in me ever becoming anything more than a lonely fuckup speedfreak just doing the same thing, over and over again, without finding any happiness in life....
i sometimes wish that my heart would just stop beating one of these days, and never start back up again....it would at least provide closure.

Yep, I definitely know that feeling man. You're not alone
Please rest assured that you will not feel this way forever, even though sometimes it feels like you will. Things WILL change. But you have to believe that they will, and work towards making little changes in your everyday life. Do you have a goal you want to work towards? Don't lose hope okay??

 

[S.M.F.G]

Ha! See what you get?

Better than a beating with a Modstick i suppose, il take the burnin

LSD: its just bein repeated but ur so not alone, i dun tweak ne more but get the hoplesly lost and nothings eva gonna get better feeling...

Thnx herbavore & n3o im doin ok atm as far as things go, freakin out about havin only a few days to get all the kids stuff ready for first year of highschool, shits expensive, then i gotta get my arse into my bridge year... Excersise and diet have returned to poor
nm else to tell, sendin everyone an im out.

 

[ugly]

i sometimes wish that my heart would just stop beating one of these days, and never start back up again....it would at least provide closure.

LSDMDMA~ you realize that one day your heart will stop beating, right? That day comes for everybody. Please don't wish it to come early. Life guarantees that one day your heart will stop forever and you will be gone from our lives on BL, to say nothing of the people irl that care for you.

I am going to die. You are going to die. I think if we take a couple deep breaths and relax, we can enjoy a moment of ease.

I hope you can find a way to enjoy something. Anything.

There is some good in being alive, right?

 

[debaser]

There is some good in being alive, right?

No.

 

[S.M.F.G]

^ Its saddening to me that there are people out there so lost that they see no point, I've been blessed with a child id hate to think where id be if i didnt have that responsibility. Shit gets hopless for me but ive just gotta hang in there my anxiety this morning is thru the roof and ive just gotta swallow my bitter little pill, And force myself outside.

On that note im gonna have my tab and take my kid to this park by the beach, We havnt been there in about 4 yrs and my gf said she'd hook us up with a snack (she works over that way) so yer on a positive note, although im feelin terrible atm @ least i know im bound to go out now and once its done it never seems as bad. Will probbly be back here spillin about it laters on.
Really need a job also so badly, but noone wants to employ someone who presents as jittery and anxious as myself, Hoping the "Good things come to those who wait" saying is true, I just wanna b happy and half normal again
Well wishes 2 everyone

 

[herbavore]

S.M.F.G.-- I hope you have a great time with your daughter. Will you swim while you are there?

@ugly-- I totally agree with you! There is always something to be thankful for, to appreciate, to feel, no matter how horrible things are. It's good to get in the habit of looking for them.

 

[helium-4]

Splat that is really awesome you were able to stop yourself from cutting, and came on here to distract yourself instead. I'm not sure if you realise quite how strong that was of you to do so
How are you feeling today??

Alright. I know I'm making progress, I set up a counselor appt with a new counselor early next week which is good. Decided to try a women, as I find sometimes they are easier to talk to about personal stuff (from personal experience talking with women I can find some trust in). Also, I have some gender (not sexuality as I'm hetero) issues, so I feel it will be easier than talking to a man about it. I'm just worried cuz she is christian and actually mentions it. She does say, that she has patients of all beliefs and it shouldn't interfere. Just kinda worries me that she even mentions it. She also seems to have a big focus on drug addictions. That might make me want to talk to her at all about drugs. I kinda want to mention some light use, but I don't want her to communicate with any of my doctors and my views on drugs to be respected, as I understand I do have abuse, but I believe responsible use can happen.

I also have a neurologist appt this week to see if I can switch my clonazepam and tramadol scripts to I'm assuming either hydrocodone (twice daily, around 2 or 3, and 1 hour before bed [this might need .5mg of clonazepam a day to go with the night time dose of hydro]), oxycodone ER (once a day later afternoon with maybe same small dose kpin), or methadone twice a day with no be benzo. I'd like to just be on a longer acting opioid that fixs both my rls and plms with out a benzo addiction. Tramadol also has a nasty addiction, especially if he rather up the dose from the 200mg I take a day to 300 or 400. The SNRI and opioid addiction from that will be nasty. A 20mg oxy, 20mg methadone, or 30mg hydrocodone addiction would be all better than the trama and benzo addiction.

 

[n3ophy7e]

Hey Splat, it sounds like you're in a better place today, how are you feeling? That is great you've got the appointment with the new cousellor, best of luck with it man, let us know how it goes okay? Much love and good vibes coming your way

 

[S.M.F.G]

Kinda bummed out... Got ditched for that trip to the park for a slepover with her best friend
thats what happens when they grow older i spose... Still went to the park nice therapy to lie in the grass and shut out everything but the sky and trees and immagine ur in an isolated place alone no one for planets away, where strange fruits grow down by the beach that taste like pork belly n wagyu beef sandwich n stuff thats real nice tasting, saw the g/f had some deep fried junk, back @ home now alone, Its kinda nice to have time to urself but im kinda ova it, I really need to connect with people in real life although i have little desire to. Unfortunatly Herby i didnt get to swim although i did think of it, the piticular beach i was going to was full of rips and has a bad rep though, didnt feel like drowning today
Whats everyone else doin atm?
Splat also wishing u all the best and hope u climbin that ladder

 

[andreas]

wow lots of new faces

havent been on in a whlie...hope people are doing ok out there

 

[herbavore]

^^ S.M.F.G.--yeah, that's why I asked about the beach. Some of my favorite beaches are ones where I wouldn't stick my big toe in the water. I love your closed-eye reverie. Sounds like a good day even if you got stood up by your daughter. You have a great attitude about it--knowing it is natural at this age. She's lucky to have you as a Dad.

^andreas-Hi and welcome back!

It's Friday--yay! This has been a long week for me.