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Using coke for confidence?

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fuckthecops

Greenlighter
Joined
Mar 24, 2011
Messages
13
Hey guys. I'm a 19 year old girl in college and I have a huge dilemma. I can't flirt with guys unless I'm drunk. Now, I don't have a problem meeting guys at parties really, but the thing is, that I'm in love with my best friend. I have been for about a year and a half now and no matter how much I try I just CANNOT make a move on him or tell him how I feel.

I don't really do coke. I've only used it a handful of times when I was drunk at a party, but I was just thinking, would it be a good idea to do a line or two before talking to this guy? I mean, this is a last resort kind of thing, I know I should work on my confidence for the long term but its like I turn retarded when I'm around him. No matter how much I anticipate it and think about how to make a move on him, I just cannot do it. Its really frustrating me and I just want to tell this guy how I feel.

So, what do you guys think?
 
I love your username. Anyways I don't think you should use coke to help you. You don't want to grow dependent on a drug just so you can have this "confidence" which will be gone in a snap of the fingers. Say you do it and it does work what's going to help you when you go on dates? And all you're doing is running around the house or checking the mirror numerous times hoping you look good (been there done that) and all you think is I wish I had something to make me feel more confident. I think you should just be yourself and tell him without the drugs. If he is cool with it then good and if he's not so be it. You only live once.... And you need to work on how you feel on the inside and not just try to go to the easy fixes first, don't rely on them especially don't rely on drugs.
 
Coke? Nah, not I'm my opinion.. If you insist on using a substance that will boost your confidence around him and be more sociable and open with him then I'd go with a low or moderate dose of 4-FA, safer than coke and longer lasting. But if you want to be in a relationship with this guy then you'll have to get used to talking with him openly while sober. I'm sure you don't plan on being high your entire relationship.
 
I mean, its not like I can't talk to him. We do talk and everything. We were pretty close last year especially but we live in different parts of campus now and he's in a fraternity so I don't see him as much. I can talk to him about anything, but I just can't tell him about how I feel. Shit, I can't tell you how many times we've blazed alone together and I just wanted to put the bong down and just kiss him... but I can't.

I just need the coke to get over the fear of rejection. Still a no go?
 
fuckthecops said:
I mean, its not like I can't talk to him. We do talk and everything. We were pretty close last year especially but we live in different parts of campus now and he's in a fraternity so I don't see him as much. I can talk to him about anything, but I just can't tell him about how I feel. Shit, I can't tell you how many times we've blazed alone together and I just wanted to put the bong down and just kiss him... but I can't.

I just need the coke to get over the fear of rejection. Still a no go?
Click to expand...

I still think there are better options... And even then if you do use the coke how do you know you'll still be able to make the move. I know coke doesn't make me feel so overly confident "as its suppose to do".

I say just go for it... Do it while you guys are blazing. I'm pretty sure he'll be down with it and if not say sorry dude I was so stoned. Yet, just make sure this is what you truly want and make sure you'll be okay with your great friendship going to shit. (This could happen either way this goes even if you date or not).
 
Shit I guess when a drug forum tells me not to use drugs, I shouldn't lol.

Thanks for the input guys. I'll try not to bitch out next time I see him haha
 
It could possibly help on the short term, but you'd be setting yourself up for a coke problem. Personally, I'm most likely to seriously abuse a drug if I'm taking it to "fix" something (particularly if it's socially related) instead of taking it purely for the enjoyment of the drug. Granted, using drugs to feel more confident is something most drug users do from time to time, but that doesn't make it any healthier.
 
Honestly, you should try sober first, but if you absolutely insist of using a drug to help, I can only suggest MDMA.

A low to medium dose, and I cannot stop my feelings from pouring out, not to mention I always somehow find myself in deep, rewarding and honest conversations when I take it, which is not all that often.
 
I would use MDMA for something that requires more in depth emotional opening than this situation.. I can't see it doing bad though
 
i'd definitely have a drink or 2(no more) if you're gonna use ANYTHING. It sounds like it would be a good idea (sober though, would be best...but they don't call it "dutch courage" for nothing) if you just tell him you have strong feelings for him... then go from there...I 2nd someone's suggestion for MDMA - between 60 & 80mg, no more...but really just take away the tension you feel by telling him. see where it can go from there by working on yourself.
 
Yeah, I wouldn't necessarily advise you using coke in this situation either. MDMA may be an alternative. I like coke and all, but it can be very addictive. IF you can set boundaries for yourself (use only once every couple of months), it may be okay. But I also don't know how great coke would be at really giving you that confidence.
Why not just have a drink or two?
 
I think it's a terrible idea. Pretty soon you'll only be able to flirt with guys while high on coke. Or worse, after a year and a half you're finally going to express your feelings to your best friend and it's going to come out like a coked out lunatic.

Some things in life you just need to (wo)man up and do sober.
 
I can't knock you, OP, because I have a glass of wine to relax on a first date. lol Just have one glass of something to chill out. Don't get drunk. Don't overdo it, but one glass just gives you that relaxed feeling without putting you into a horrible state of mind.
 
Not coke maye a wine glass or try a joint but NOT coke.
I have issues with sex because i was raped... every time I sawmy fiancé in the start i would and he doesnt even know this lol but take coke 25 min before he came... 2-3 lines. i did this with almost every guy before him too. it becomes a habit and breaks being " normally social while sobor"
 
I personally would advise against using anything too addictive in this way. Booze or pot or MDMA might be good choices, but I would make sure that any drug use is in the open and something he is taking as well if possible, not something you do as a pre-game to get psyched up for it. I would personally suggest that you break the ice while extremely fucked up, probably drunk but possibly tripping. That way at least if he turns you down you can play the "sorry I was so fucked up" angle. God that is terrible advice, but honestly it works. It is hard to tell someone who you have been friends with that you want something more without making it awkward later. If it wasn't someone who you were close with already I would agree with most others and suggest moderation. If you really can be that honest with each other about everything else you might not need anything, though. Just do what feels right I guess.
 
Stick with a low dose of one of the three holy GABA-ergics:

Alcohol
Benzodiazepines
GHB

Undetectable in low quantities and will eliminate anxiety.
 
While I dont know you personally, I know from experience it wont just be "for confidence" after a while. If you get into the habit of habitually using a substance like cocaine, and associate it with something such as confidence boosting, youll find it easy to get hooked and find it hard to get off - simple psychology.

In all honesty, if you have to use substances to get to a level in which you can comfortably socialize with others (and especially in a sexual way), you shouldnt be looking into chemicals to alleviate your problems, you should be looking into ways to psychologically break these barriers that keep you from reaching your full social potential on your own.

But to play the devils advocate for a second, weed is a great social ice breaker (if its accepted by the group of course)
 
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