^that sounds like an absolutely absurd, manically inspired, reason to continue abusing methoxetamine. "I might learn French!" Seriously ridiculous... which I suppose is justification enough in your mind state, right?
Even after a while, this thread never disappoints,:D
I actually find the delusion/revelation-aspect of dissociatives to be one of their most fascinating qualities, if one however keeps in mind that they actually are just, "only" drug induced changes in ones thinking patterns, instead of anything of value per se. Instead of taking their, at-the-moment-very-convinsing, contents as a face value, they can teach you about the fascinating ways your mind works creating these thoughts.
What i still can't understand though, is how some of those people who seem to have, perhaps even a too generous habit of MXE, still are able to hole on it continuosly?
When i used it enthusiastically last winter/spring, i developed pretty fast a steady tolerance to it's dissociative properties.... And it seems to have caused a pretty lasting cross-tolerance with DXM, as doses of even 1200mg's don't do literally anything for me anymore.
Haven't taken MXE for a few months now.
I must however visit it again sometime in the future. Not in any near future tho.
edit. Had to mention also that after a semi-long pause, trying it again and re-dosing many times during 2 days, ended in me having the most realistic, all senses encompassing hallucinations ever. They lasted for few hours and then suddenly stopped as fast they had appeared. I think the "DXM plateau sigma", would descripe them pretty well. I was, obviously inside the M-hole, seeing and also feeling things in my apartment having changed shapes in some very gruesome horrifying way. I would take things, like my cellphone, on my hand and thoroughly inspecting them find that they had metamorphosized into something nightmarish, disfigured perversion of their real life counterparts. While in this state i was however perfectly functional motor-wise and would run around my apartment in total confusion why this had happened. It was more like total psychosis than your regular m-hole, because only certain, and also only some of their very certain details, parts of reality were changed and other parts left unchanged, and in 110% realistic way also. Could the DRI-effects have attributed to this?
They were so realistic that when i tried to use my phone for example or type with keyboard, they either wouldn't work at all or gave out some weird-yet-perfectly-within-their-conxtext-behaving responses. And continued to give out the exact same responses when tried again. At that point I was completely sure that they had gone broken beyond repair by me misusing them somehow while i was inside hole (of course not realising that i was still very much inside the said hole).
Probably had something to do with the mindgames I was playing with myself coming down from the previous hole before that. At one point in that hole, i was convinced that i had taken enough of MXE to have teleported myself into this horrifying alternate reality and was now permanently trapped in it, never to experience my normal way of seeing things again. Other very crazy explanations for this hellish scenario ran through my terrified head also. Well after a couple of hours the hallucinations suddenly stopped in a matter of seconds. As fast as they had begun.
So, as has been many times said already, be especially careful if you are thinking of taking big doses of mxe in public setting. Might go well, might go not-so well....