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Mental Health Depression MEGA Thread - DepressionTalk + Over 100 Links of Info

Anything with mood alternating effects can be something we are dependent on/become so. This is honestly what pisses me off so much about the legality of drugs and the system/society of people with their stigmas towards drugs which are more mainstream.

I can sit there and drink as much liquor, coffee, or smoke as much carcinogens as I wish from a cigarette but I cannot smoke a blunt without repercussions as a possibility. The latter is definitely not the most addictive thing in the world and yet stays trace in my system longest. Go figure.
 
Just wanted to update -

I'm feeling a bit better, especially the past few weeks. Been getting my shit together... going to a new psych, starting classes next semester & setting those up this upcoming week (which I'm very happy about).

Just need to see what happens with the psychiatrist and figure out if I need to continue figuring out the never ending story of being medicated.

Hope you all have happy holiday.

-dp
 
i spent over 6 months on a waiting list to see a psychologist here in th uk and, finally when i got my appointment, i explained my problems to the psycholgist and she basically said that my problems werent worth her time and that actually i dont need any help at all. it has made me feel so hopeless like ive tried everything now and what else can i do? its not like i have money for a private psychologist.

has anyone else had this happen to them?
 
3dmusic said:
For everyone who is depressed with their situation, I would say, to write it down, and turn the negative words into positive ones. What you fear, into what you want.
This helps things come into your head that never occured to you before.
New ideas, and new ways of looking at/going about things.
Click to expand...

I know this was posted right on the first page, but this really is amazingly good advice. I did this a few years back and was amazed how much I taught myself about myself within just an hour of writing things like this down in a truly honest way, without any fear anyone else would read it. Once you organize your thoughts about why you think you are unhappy in an easy to see way on paper its a lot easier to start to see the solutions to all your issues and work with them. This was much better for me than any drug I've tried, I've only got borderline depression/anxiety now.
 
Lazy - Report them. That is spectacularly unprofessional behaviour. You deserve better care than that, and while it may be tough to get it right now at the very least you can make sure that the people who monitor such things know what a tool that psychologist is.
 
Been there before, it sucks. It's not necessarily that all the psychologists do not give a shit about the problems you have it's more so to do with how their practices run these days.

You should try finding a psychologist/psychiatrist that can work together therefor you can get the time in with the psychologist that you need and that can be relayed to the psychiatrist who may not have the time necessary to do talk to you each visit (especially if it's not a private practice).

Good luck.

-dp
 
I've been having a lot of problems lately. I'm constantly on edge, constantly questioning my sanity and my life. I'm always questioning reality, questioning life itself and who I am and who I'm not. I feel like I'm constantly driving myself more and more insane, and I'm convinced I have mental problems, something has to be wrong with me!

I've always had a rough life. When I was 15, my mother was diagnosed with lung cancer, and she passed away a little over 12 months ago. I never had much sense of accomplishment in myself, I always found ways of feeling good either through making people smile, or by using drugs. I've never been happy with myself, who I am, or who I think I am. I think I'm self destructive in the sense that I keep using drugs because I can't deal with reality, and it's the only way I can feel good about life.

Lately I've been having a lot of fits of anxiety and restlessness. I've been becoming depressed out of nowhere, even crying for reasons I'm not even sure of. The slightest thing can set me off in either direction. A text from a a girl I had a crush on recently sent me into a fit of hysterical crying because the thought of her reminded me of how lonesome I am, and how I don't have someone I can love. In comparison, my father can tell me I'm wrong about something, and it'll send me flying off the handle with pure anger and the biggest urge to smash things. Sometimes I don't even have an excuse for becoming manically sad or angry. For example, just the other day I found myself pacing back and forth, restless and infuriated for no reason at all. It's affecting my daily life, affecting my ability to enjoy anything.

Things have lost their meaning to me. I can understand reasons for doing things, but despite that they lack any reason for me to do them. I can sit and play guitar, I can rationalize playing by saying I enjoy playing music, but then I just get lost in spiral thoughts of why bother. It's as though my head spirals downward into a loop of negativity. I hate myself because I'm depressed, and I'm depressed because I hate myself. It's a cycle for me. It's been affecting me so much that the past 2 weeks I've been having 34 hour days because I can't sleep, my mind is just racing with thoughts.

I want to see a doctor, I want to see a psychiatrist, but it's taking so long for my father to make an appointment for me. It's not like I can do it myself, my situation doesn't allow it because of my constant travels back and forth between states. I was put on SSRI's 3 years ago, and I used them for 2 years, but I stopped because I hated how they made me feel. I really want prescriptions for a low dose of Xanax when I have these fits, and a prescription for Ambien to help me sleep at night. I feel helpless though, nothing is getting done as far as seeing a doctor is concerned.

I wish I felt normal. I feel like something is wrong with me, at all times. I'm always focusing on the negatives. I just want to feel normal, but I have no fucking idea what normal is suppose to be. I don't even believe normal exists, it's just an abstract idea of ones surroundings. I guess what I really mean to say is, I want to live day by day without constant anxiety and pressure, constant confusion. In my mind, it's no wonder people kill themselves. Reality is relentless. It's a constant test of oneself, I hate it and want it to end already! It's too bad I'm too scared to take my own life. I just want this all to end already...
 
Dillon89 said:
Nice post, thanks for sharing but there is a little issue. Some of the shared links are not working
properly. I was curious about it. Can you see the problem?
regards
Click to expand...

Can you identify the links that aren't working so that we can fix them? Thanks!
 
so does anyone else have constant physical pain, headaches and feelings that their skin is crawling alongside their depression or is it just me?

i loved your post J.Wallace, i can relate to everything you said.
 
How does one come out of depression?

I have been sitting in my basement, wasting my youth away for the past 4 months. Dropped out of highschool, stopped seeing my friends, stopped doing anything. I go to work 4 days a week so at least I have that. I don't have anything going for me in life right now. I want this cloud that's been sitting on my shoulders to go away.

Seeing a counsellor doesn't help....all i can think of when I sit there in her crappy little office is how she probably doesn't really give a shit and she's getting paid 50$ an hour to hear about some 17 year old girls problems. Who really gives a shit? Why should anyone care about me, I have everything I could possibly want in life....friends (who I choose to ignore), loving parents, a house to live in, the ability to do whatever I'd like to in life, Yet I sit here, being the privileged little teenie that I am and hate who I am. Everyone always told me I had "potential" if only I tried. I was one of those kids that got good grades without trying, was always too smart for my own good and I knew it.

So was it the drugs? or was it inevitable........
 
Hey fake, i really feel for you. Sitting in that dark hole and seeing no way out just potentiates bad feelings by a thousand times and leaves you without hope or motivation for anything. It is great that you don't give yourself up and reach for help, that is the first step to improvement. Therapists that don't give a shit are a bummer... but they just do therapy as a job and not all are passionate about their work. Maybe it would be helpful to watch out for another one? In the end it is all about you. Counsellors may help you to identify your dysfunctional thinking or behaviour, but you have to change your life all by yourself. Having a job is indeed a great thing.
Make your bed in the morning, tidy up your room, switch off your depressing music and listen to something encouraging instead. Respect and treat yourself well. Do some sports and go meet some friends, maybe you're able to talk about your issues with them, even if you don't feel like doing all that right now. It's all about the small things in life and a therapist will only be able to help you if you are really determined to make a change in your life. Thats no patent recipe but it is what helps me most when i'm feeling the fog in my head thickens again.
If those things don't work sufficiently you would do good by getting an appointment with a psychiatrist and evaluate if a antidepressant medication might be suitable...

If it was the drugs or something in your life is hard to figure out. My therapist in rehab always said that constantly taking drugs is the safest way to fall into depression. Either you start taking drugs because you are already depressed and try to self medicate or you get depressed from the drugs due to fuck ups in your brain chemistry and loss of interests apart from getting high.

Hope you're doing better soon!
 
I cannot stop thinking about myself. Is that depression? It gets really tiring. Also having some serious unemployment issues, foggy thoughts,...I smoke pot (< 2 grams a week) but thats it no other substance beside caffeine. Also like zero self-worth at times moderate tho.
 
ive become very empty and depressed since my dad has passed away and im only 21 and that ive made some bad descions and im addicted to heroin and i smoke crack so drugs fuck with my emotions to having an addiction. Lifes just very hard for me right now and i feel so lost.
 
So now I'm diagnosed with ADHD inattentive type, too. Since I'm going through a tough time, my psych upped my bupropion dose from 150 mg to 300 mg. I had a serious relapse in december with coke and heroin, although it only lasted one night. After that, my girlfriend and I broke up one day before christmas eve, and that hurts like a motherfucker. We broke up with no hard feelings, because it was a very challenging and exhausting relationship for both of us and now I'm on my own again. I got a new place and now I'm starting to plan the move, at the same time I get this diagnosis, after long months of waiting it seems I'm about to get a psychotherapist. My last monetary reserves of money are vanishing so I also need to work much more in the next months. At least classes are going well and I'm really proud that apart from a small slip-up on new years eve I managed to stay sober. I'm gonna thank god when it's march, I'm in my new flat and can even think of leading a constant life. Since June it's been a fucking roller-coaster ride.
 
^^ Skywave I'm so sorry things are so hard for you at the moment. It is entirely understandable that you feel lost. How long ago was it that your dad passed away? These things take a very long time to "heal" (and I use that word loosely - it's more of a gradual learning to adjust and live with the fact that they are gone) and turning to drugs/alcohol is very common - reality's not much fun, so wanting to escape it is entirely normal. You may feel that you have ruined your life, or there is no way for things to change but you have your whole life ahead of you. Have you got any help with your bereavement and your drug addictions? It sounds to me like you just need a helping hand right now, while things are so tough - they do improve, I promise you <3

^VanWeyden, I'm really glad to hear that things are going well for you! Certainly does sound like you've been through a rollercoaster, and that can leave you feeling completely exhausted - and break ups are always hard - but it's brilliant to hear that classes are going well and you've managed to stay sober. In some ways that is more impressive than if you hadn't slipped up - so many people would have been tempted to relapse, but you stayed strong and carried on with sobriety. Big congrats! Good luck with the work/money situation :) <3
 
Thank you so much, effie! Yep, I am indeed very proud of staying sober and not backing down after these relapses. For me it is an indicator that rehab really was useful for me. If that had happened before therapy I would have fallen back into my full blown habit, because I would have beaten myself up to a point where I would sasy that I'm a using addict forever, that I'm not worth staying clean and that it is my destiny to destroy myself with drugs. But now I learned a whole lot from both incidents and in a way they were useful for me.
Unfortunately I have come to know today that my future flat mates enjoy the occasional joint - don't know if it's really just occasional or more - and that leaves me cogitating if that really is the right place for me. On one hand, most of my friends also smoke from time to time and thats no problem for me, and to find a completely abstinent flat share, but on the other hand getting away from the drugged place I live in now was one factor to move and I wonder if I'm already strong enough for that. I feel like I have to talk openly about my addiction problems with them and decide then if it's the right place for me or not.

OK, now I'm really hijacking the depression thread with addiction topics so that should be enough ;-)
 
Lazyscience said:
so does anyone else have constant physical pain, headaches and feelings that their skin is crawling alongside their depression or is it just me?

i loved your post J.Wallace, i can relate to everything you said.
Click to expand...

I feel the same way. I was diagnosed with migraines when I was 6 or 7, and now have had constant headaches that have been causing a lot of pressure in my head from the back of my neck to my eyes & sinuses. I just got another CAT scan today for my sinuses I'm hoping to honestly have a doctor tell me they find something they can treat because it's getting ridiculous trying to figure out what is going on.

You're not alone. I'm just moving forward slowly while trying to work on my mentality & just hoping for the best.

Good luck.

-dp
 
dilated_pupils said:
I'm hoping to honestly have a doctor tell me they find something they can treat because it's getting ridiculous trying to figure out what is going on.
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I know how you feel, i swear i deal with headaches on a daily basis.. it's become so common that i've developed a tolerance to the pain.. however despite two CAT scans and visitng multiple doctors there's no defining reason for why their occurring, i wish they would find something so then measures can be taken towards that. That's one aspect of going to the doctor that i've always disliked; unless im on the edge of death it's unlikely that they will be-able to find anything wrong with me.. which is fair enough, there's probably a multitude of possibilities for the cause, but it sucks for me..

I have suffered from migraines in the past, one episode was so painful that i ended up passing out on my bed in the dark.. this was some years ago now. I've had nothing of the like since, but headaches in general are a common occurrence.
 
I feel like a hollow, empty person. How do you get rid of this void? :/
 
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