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Positive The Tapering Supportive/Social Thread

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Yeah man, I'll never do H again. Seriously, it's like I'm reborn. I can't believe I even ever did that. I am taking my oxy as prescribed, once and for all. And since I was in cold turkey for so long I can actually get enough relief from 30mg a day which is what I'm taking today and the rest of the month (or less).
I feel fucking amazing today and I'm not at all concerned about the acid, and I'm not even thinking about H anymore. I was fiending it, and ever since the trip it just seems gross. I also don't have a connect anymore I'm totally done man. I'm at 30mg oxy and staying here for the rest of the year to help me stabilize (I don't want to CT from like 100 to 300mg of H a day). I feel like I'd have horrible post-acute withdrawals if I stayed cold turkey, wouldn't accomplish anything for the rest of the year, end up relapsing on H fed up. I'll keep on my oxy's man especially now that I don't even really have back pain on them and it's only 30mg!
I'll keep writing here to make sure I'm good but I know that I am. I know that I'm done. I ended up grabbing the benzos I needed that I had been neglecting... I need to taper/maintain those too, but I was spending all my money on H. Every cent by the end of it. That is just a great sign because I the thought of grabbing more H did not cross my mind, I was thinking of getting some weed but I've smoked habitually for 2 weeks already and fuck weed honestly. I fiend that shit more than the heroin so that's what I was struggling not to get, since I actually need the benzos (you can't just take several milligrams of klonopin a day and abruptly stop... I think I would die).
 
Yeah I tried cold turkey off 6 mg/day Lorazepam and had a small seizure after only about 16 hours. Benzos seem to be the one you absolutely must taper from or you actually could die.
I was able to taper pretty fast from that though. About 50% reduction every 7 days, down to 1/2 mg per day then off. It wasn't really bad for me. Some depression but I'm screwed in the head anyway so I could barely notice.
 
Hey Shroomy- I'm over here doing a little celebratory dance and jumping up and down for you!!! 2 weeks and more!!!! I'm so happy for you!!!

Squeaky- I'm still working through some of the PAWS from benzo drop, it sucks. The depression lasted a couple of weeks, now I find myself angry for no good reason. I hate it! I get irritated at the drop of a hat, and most of the time when I think about it there is no VALID reason. I can pinpoint the why, but if I think about it, it just isn't worth being angry about! Good luck, and it does inch its way better. I wonder if tapering would have left me less roller-coaster in the mood department? Let me know how it worked for you.

Nice to see you guys, I hope you both continue to do well. I think (because it is how I am too) that for those of us in chronic pain, with little relief in sight, depression is a given. I keep hearing Exercise will make you better! However, when more often than not walking is so painful you avoid it like the plague, how do you exercise? Swimming is my only pain freeish way to exercise and it's not easy getting to a pool everyday.
 
Hi Guys,

I am very happy to hear you are doing better Shroomy!!
Proud of you brother.

I hear you on the exercise G.R.S.H.
Damn, just getting a shower and dressed makes me exhausted.
I can barely do it.
I count it as exercise. It is so depressing being able to do so little now.
Being in constant pain is just so difficult and yeah, the depression it causes is bad.

I have a question for you guys.
I did not do so well this month with my pain medication (M.S Contin)
Can anyone tell me how long it takes to adjust from like 75-90 mg a day for about 15 days (usually stick to 75 mg a day)
down to 60 mg a day?
I have got to stick to 60 mg a day now until the 1st of next month or I will run myself out of medicine and I can't do that.
I don't feel too bad- minor flu, shit, withdrawal symptoms. I don't feel too good either.
Does anyone know if I will adjust in a few days or what?
I appreciate any knowledge on this.

Thanks guys and hang in there everyone.
I send you all lots of love.
<3
 
I do yoga, especially a lot of yin yoga and cycling as well. But I also do more 'yang' poses too than just 'yin' so I am working my muscles as well as stretching. I am actually in really great shape for having chronic pain and I am a healthy weight. Normally I am bigger than average for my height but when I hit two weeks of withdrawal I lose quite a bit of weight then gain it back later.

I'll never go back to H, it's not even an option now. I'm taking my oxy's as prescribed today too and having no problem at all with that. In fact it's 20 minutes until I dose again and I have no cravings, and no withdrawal symptoms so I'm going to stay at this dose because well, it was given to me for severe back pain. I can maybe drop down in the future but why rush when I have my pills now? I took some extras yesterday but I am counting and making sure I account for them by taking a little less some days (in like two weeks though... not soon haha after all that CT withdrawal).

I personally think that no matter what the taper, it takes ten days for the brain to produce its own endorphins and make up for the dose drop. The higher the drop, the harsher the symptoms. If you don't feel to bad, I would say you have a mild withdrawal going on... I'd grab like the thomas recipe online or something. Immodium will help, tylenol or codeine, keeping hydrated and trying to eat at least a little bit of healthy food... valerian, chamomile, melatonin if you can't sleep. Benzos for sure. Just my opinion that it will still take ten days, that's why I have always done steeper drops just to get it over with and well because I've been broke as fuck with my tolerance 4 times what it technically should be, more like 10 times really. Just my guess though I'm not quite sure, but it seems like the brain takes a little time to catch up when you drop the dose.

I'm definitely not going back, I'm already at the point where I get a little bit high off my script because I was in cold turkey for so long so that's pretty sweet, and I have very little pain. I slipped and fell really hard on my back the other week, and for the whole next week I had trouble walking. I'm so fragile fuck. My whole left upper ribs were killing me, but I was in CT withdrawal anyway and I used it as an excuse as to why I had to lay in bed that whole week.

I got some norflurazepam instead of H : ) since I need to start tapering off benzos and this is one I've never tried before. Always love trying new benzos so yeah that's what is next. I really have to figure that out - since they are cheap I can get them elsewhere and save up my valium to do a self taper and that is kind of my plan here. Etizolam as backup but norflurazepam as my main benzo for the next while.
 
Painful One said:
Hi Guys,
I have a question for you guys.
I did not do so well this month with my pain medication (M.S Contin)
Can anyone tell me how long it takes to adjust from like 75-90 mg a day for about 15 days (usually stick to 75 mg a day)
down to 60 mg a day?
I have got to stick to 60 mg a day now until the 1st of next month or I will run myself out of medicine and I can't do that.
I don't feel too bad- minor flu, shit, withdrawal symptoms. I don't feel too good either.
Does anyone know if I will adjust in a few days or what?
I appreciate any knowledge on this.
Click to expand...

It has been my experience that an adjustment like that shouldn't take long, for me it's a week at tops, I have a friend that would take a little more time to adjust to what your change. I hope that it is quick for you! I will NOT tell you to exercise (glad I am not the only one), but I would suggest water. Hydrating often helps me a lot when I have to change my meds. I wish you luck in your change!

Love right back to you!
 
PainfulOne- A drop like that really sucks for me about 2 or 3 days. Then it's just comfortable for another 2 or 3 days. Then after a total of about 7 I start getting some pain relief from my doses. At that level you're dropping, the most important thing for me is staying distracted. It's really the thinking about how much it sucks that kills me. Whatever you can do to pass time will help.
 
Just rewriting this. So yeah Squeaky dude I am messing up a little bit, but not really. I'm taking not even double my weak, scripted dose which I am finally going to bring up to my doctor in a not-so-nice way. I'm sick of being underprescribed for my pain... taking 60mg oxy a day isn't that much of a hardcore addiction, especially compared to what I was using before.

I will never do heroin again, ever. If I do, it will be a mistake and I will know that right away. I will know that before even getting it and only bring cash for the smallest amount. I'm just sayin man like I'm totally done with it and last time, that was the first step. Last year around March I stopped H, and it took until around September for me to start tapering oxy's.

I'd like to keep at my scripted dose but it's so fucking low still, I'd rather keep count of my pills and make up for extras here and there. I don't feel very physically dependent anymore.

I think I'm doing really well. I got some norflurazepam, which should be an excellent benzo and in fact, a great one for tapering (it has like a 75 hour half life and long duration). I am really excited to try it... I'm like a kid on Christmas trying new benzos lol. They all feel so different at first. Klonopin was the weirdest, bromazepam is my social benzo... etc etc etc I have a benzo for everything but now I am going to be keeping strict track of my benzo use and also exclusively use norflurazepam, probably 20 or 30mg a day. Which means my supply will last months and I'll be tapering during that time really slowly. Then, I'll have my benzo script saved up which happens to be the one they give you for long term tapers usually. So my valium is on hold for now, and if I need a short acting benzo for a panic attack I can take etizolam. In a way, tapering oxy's is good practice for the benzo taper to come.

I am doing very well I'd say despite taking a little extra oxy I'm not going to kick myself over that considering I blew through my prescription in 3 days last time which was chaotic. I've always been able to moderate my oxy use 'pretty well' but the moment I use heroin I begin fiending for as many opiates/opioids I can get.

I'm lucky I am recovering so fast due to the extreme abuse this past time. Since the last day of November last year, I was on heroin up until a few weeks ago. It was the first thing I did in the morning, and essentially sniffed it every 2 to 3 hours for 6 months. It was the 2nd purest dope I've had in 5 years and the withdrawal was hell, but I'm surprised I am recovering so fast - I think it's because I'm doing all the right things: 10km walks, therapeutic high dose psychedelic journeys, keeping hydrated, sleeping well, feasting on nutritious food, doing yoga, drinking so much tea for antioxidants and the water... I feel over this, I feel more recovered than when I was months into my oxy taper last year. We'll have to see how things go long term. (I mean the heroin... I still have to taper off oxy's but I'm at a pretty low dose and I don't even know if I want to go lower than like 30 to 40mg).

Hope you are doing well Squeaky and GRSH and I assume Pokemama is doing quite well. I was in a tough spot when I was cold turkey recently and I'm happy to have my script. I don't see myself really abusing it but running out like a week early maybe which would suck but I mean I just got off heroin and I'm never doing it again EVER. Not once, I find it disgusting, so if I take an extra 20mg oxy at least for the rest of this week I don't give a fuck. I stopped sniffing that shit and it's just percs in comparison. Heroin is truly evil and it's chock full of research chemicals these days... I don't want cancer when I'm older, and my back pain hasn't been too too bad lately. I think the dose I'm on will be sufficient because my tolerance is definitely still dropping. I was high as absolute fuck on the heroin compared to these percs and tamper proof meds, there is no reason at all to bash oxy. It's not 'synthetic heroin' or whatever the fuck. Heroin is WAY worse for you and I can't believe I was sniffing so much of it. Sometimes I'd pass out too, like I coulda died from sniffing the shit. I also shot it up 4 times this year successfully, really great decisions all around.

I have an extremely negative view of heroin now. I can't see myself ever doing it again and I know it's early to say that but I honestly never will. I have too much self respect to be a fucking slave to the point that this god damned drug had me laying in bed suffering indescribable pain for two weeks, losing weight, ruining years of my life - it truly is evil. Although I personally don't think it should be compared so much to painkillers. I feel like that makes it easier for people to make the switch. They are NOT the same AT ALL. I didn't try heroin because I was prescribed oxy. I tried heroin because there was an over two year wait for the public pain clinic, and it was the cheapest painkiller available to me during that time that was strong enough.
 
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When life hurts and there's something that makes it stop hurting, that's what you do. That's how we all got here. The trick is finding your way back.
It sounds like you're on your way back Shroomi. Congrats brother.
 
edit - I'm fucking up man because of someone else's bullshit. A family member has a problem with me smelling like pot - so instead of smoking a bong rip when I had cravings earlier, which would have been more than enough, I took an extra 80mg oxy. I can't stand this shit dude, I was feeling suicidal. I had already taken 60mg as well. I am quickly falling apart. I was several weeks clean of opiates but I can't handle WAY too many things right now. If I had a gun I'd be pointing it at my face and pulling the trigger right the fuck NOW.

To be honest man I don't think I'll see the end of the year. I think I have all the motivation in the world right now and when I see how far I have to go to get to where I want to be, it's possible I might consider a possible reincarnation. I am severely depressed today to the point that I want to kill myself, but that 80mg will kick in soon and I'll be alright. Just not in a week or two.

edit again - I'm fuckin up completely now. I need to get it together or I'll run out early. Gotta take it easy, I'm crisis-smoking some DMT tomorrow morning.
 
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Shroomi- opinions are like buttholes. Unless that family member can kick you out of your home or stop your incoming money, just avoid them at all costs when you're smoking.
I tell certain people that I 'can't make it' to whatever family event because my back is "really hurting today". It gets me out of dealing with a lot of buttholes. You could do the same around the judgemental pot-haters and avoid the stress that comes with their opinions.
 
Man, I have a date tomorrow / this afternoon!!! She is a foxy cutie too. I'm proud of myself. I need to get over my ex which ended last year and I have been solo ever since. Confused and fuelling the fire of my dope use. It was awful by the end of it, we weren't right for each other.

The two of us are super excited to hang out just us tomorrow, and her place is a couple minutes away from mine. We've been talking a lot since I got her number and we have a lot in common. She thinks I am cute and also trouble. I told her about the oxy habit and she gets it, she is not the type to give me shit for taking those and she knows chronic pain is tough to deal with. I'm glad I took the chance and told her. I'm way better with oxy's than dope but I'm still getting over dope trying to forget that shit ever happened so I'm gonna run out early this month - I'll probably be without oxycodone for a week. No getting extras though, and certainly getting no stupid fucking H. It's not worth it and I should be detoxing every month anyway.

I'll probably take a few extra percs tomorrow... I'll be nervous a little. I never go on dates and it's her place. We very clearly find each other attractive so... guys have trouble with this coming off these drugs. There is info about that on youtube (calm support testosterone I think would find it) - if you are a guy reading this with that issue. Couple percs but maybe I can skip my night time dose. I'm more excited than anything.
 
Hey, so I've been following this thread for a while since I also have a habit that I'm trying to break but I haven't posted because I'm just not succeeding so it would feel kinda fake. Hanyways, I was moved to reply to your post, Squeaky since some years ago I broke my wrist. It was set in hospital and healed but I was left in agonising pain and with little movement in my wrist. Several doctors later,I finally found a doctor who was honest and told me that the doc who set my wrist screwed up and it had healed in the wrong position but that he could fix it for me. Long story short, two years later I was finally free from the agonising pain and with full mobility in my wrist. So I'm glad for you as it sounds as if you've found a doctor with his head screwed on who will really be able to help you.
 
Thanks Bluebell. Unfortunately I think it will be 6 months to a year before I'll be having another surgery. But.. yeah a surgeon who might be able to help is awesome.
Congrats again Shroomi. That's one hell of a step forward. Be careful with those perc's. Take too many for confidence and you'll end up impotent. I know because it has happened to me.
 
Oh that sucks that it will take so long but at least it can happen, it seems? Why will you have to wait for six months to a year?

And yes, whilst it's great that it can happen and that you have that hope, you have to deal with the reality in the meantime. The reality of your pain and the reality of how you cope with your pain. That (for me, would be) is a scary timeframe, that you *might* be naturally pain free in over a year's time. Then again, that does give you an endgame with managing your pain relief. You know your pain will end at a particular point in time so managing it with exponential quantities will eventually harm you more than it helps you.

Shoot, I'm quite sure this is not helping you, I apologise if I've overstepped the mark but I wanted to elucidate my thought process in case there is anything of use there at all.
 
Squeaky brother, I am nervous about the low-T problem that comes with taking these drugs. She knows I'm getting clean slowly but surely though... I took the chance and told her about the oxy and she has been really nice about it, so I'm going to explain to her how this happens and like why she might have to cut me some slack in that regard for the first little bit. It takes like 3 months sometimes to return to normal. The more sex the faster you recover from low testosterone issues if you get them from opiate abuse (it is a very common side effect right up there with constipation). Actually opiate addicts have 25% the testosterone of a non-user on average.

So I have a little explaining to do lol. If I don't take any oxy today, I'll be oxy sick and not even go see her even though she lives really close by. Be all restless and stuff. I'll be bedridden in a shittier kinda way (oh, that was a silly double meaning there).

There has to be balance, my oxy's have at least lasted a week this time and I have plenty more! I'm probably going to be dope sick for 2 weeks before getting more oxy's but I mean this is a huge improvement from doing H all day. I have yet to consider that fucking garbage. It wounded me. So yeah man of course I'm really excited to have a date / hangout at this level of mutual attraction and since I already told her a few opiate war stories just because we have been talking so much since we met, that if anything I think she'd be supportive (haha... hahaha. I just kinda realized what that means between her and myself haha!!) I'll see how things go today. Dude this is one aspect of opiates that I really dislike. Makes me feel like they take away from my manhood.
 
It's all good Shroomi. I appreciate the input.
It might be a year before the lawyers figure out who's gonna pay for another surgery. I'm in the USA and I got hurt at work.
 
Just stopping by to say hello Shroomi and Squeaky. I always enjoy reading your posts Squeaky... and Shroomi, I am reading about your thoughts quitting H and meeting a new girl.
I will have 5 months clean and sober, off all mind altering substances on 7/25/2017. I continue to feel better and better with each passing month.
Take care.
 
Hey everyone, I am doing okay. I took more oxy's at the beginning of the month, now I am taking less of them. I didn't really get a withdrawal from a week of overuse. What I'm doing isn't sustainable but it's better than doing H and eventually I'll tire myself of all of this and just stop. I haven't had an opiate in over 24 hours and I don't care, I'm not panicking about getting more. I don't feel dependent on them anymore but I'm occasionally binging on them or better yet using them for particular circumstances (like the date with the girl I was a little nervous about lol... as prescribed right)

She was amazing by the way. At least I still have got that in me lol. I can see this getting serious. I haven't felt that way about someone in a really long time and it is mutual and if I'm dopesick and come up with excuses and exhibit addict behaviour and all that bullshit then I won't really have a chance with her because she really wants to get to know me both light and dark. She has an idea of what I'm going through and just wants to help. So, I am really happy that happened yay and will likely happen again since I really like her. I actually can't wait to see her again and I know it's mutual so I should focus on my own shit and try to stop thinking how mind blowing that was lol... but then I keep hearing how she was calling me hot shit hehe.

I'm grabbing a very heavy and hypnotic benzo (norflurazepam) this week and I think it will help with the post acute symptoms that I'm sure will come up mainly insomnia and extreme anxiety. Well I am going to try smoke some more hash oil so I can giggle and try and forget about this chick on my mind because damn is it frustrating (I haven't been craving opiates too much or anything... I fancy this cute lady. So there are a lot of feelings going on. I'm def craving a dab of oil at the moment though because yeah I'd just really like to be with her again.Talk about fun... so I'll get stoned and watch a movie or something. I did binge and take around 80mg a day for a week so I'm going cold turkey for the following week. I don't even think I will get withdrawals, maybe very mild ones until the weekend when I just might have another lucky date.

I am more addicted mentally than physically now. Before I was on a tight schedule and like I'd know when around I'd start feeling sick and stuff but now, I experience symptoms randomly sometimes and my use is also random unless it is the week I get my script then it's higher. So I have a few percs and ER meds left for the month to use wisely. Really I need them for pain sometimes and that's it but I am used to the comfort of being on dope. Sporadic use seems to lead to less physical dependency... I woke up this morning and didn't take any oxy's or opiates right away. They have not been on my mind. My new friend has been on my mind a little and so have been some other priorities of mine but after taking around 80mg daily for a week I am taking a day or two of cold turkey to recuperate and also to adjust to this new benzos. Oh, and talk about workout. Since, all I do is yoga, long walks, cycling, and I haven't been keeping up with it this new sweetheart chick is a part of my workout plan haha. Two days later my muscles especially legs but several others are still recovering lol and I think she decided last night that she couldn't do it again so soon last night. hehe. Sex is good for opiate recovery once you hit paws symptoms that's for sure and the thing is I kinda need to be off opiates because they cause testosterone issues but I've also worked through that enough already that I was able to function haha. The oxy made a night of it over a minute LOL. She was phenomenal and cute and amazing haha sorry for ranting about this but it was like almost a year after a horrible nasty breakup and I wasn't expecting this and I am very very happy about that experience hehe.

Sooo I got what amounts to like a 2 day supply of getting high for the rest of the month but I'm not concerning myself with acquiring more. You know what I really want to try kratom tea. Ohhhhh i SO need to give kratom a try at this point!!! I'm smoking weed too at least my new friends weed and I killed her stash when I was there lol. Since I spent all my cash on norflurazepam which is what I really need for this detox. Weed is more of a luxury but having a hypnotic, powder-99% benzo that is equipotent to valium, making it easy to measure doses and taper off benzos too, is really going to help. Thing is with keeping track of doses and all this the dope is always on my mind. I don't think about it anymore very much. I think about heroin and it's like I'd do a line if it was in front of me right now in a heartbeat, but I wouldn't put myself in a situation where I could get ahold of it and that is harder than it seems. I'm staying on my oxy for pain and I imagine that every month there will be a slight improvement in being able to control them. This month I am probably going to have to go 2 weeks dry and that won't be fun, but it's okay. I mean I just got off Heroin for fucks sake I'd like to keep a little oxy around and plus just going from sniffing to oral use is tough because the same type of high and experience can't be achieved. I used to love railing dope, more than shooting it even. I haven't used it in what seems like such a long time - it hasn't been a long time, but a lot of changes are happening in my life and I've actually been doing stuff.

I'm really happy. I am making progress here, progress with cute women, progress with my career hunt, progress with maintaining my benzo stash (I loveeee trying new benzos, and Norflurazepam as a very long acting half life hypnotic at this potency is fascinating to me), but I don't have any fucking pot because certain people in my life started giving me shit within two days about it. It was really helping to pass the time and keep me optimistic and busy in withdrawal. I'm not sick anymore - I think like I mentioned before binging on occasion but never for long and not getting extra pills ever, dealing with long periods of time without any opiates at all. Pretty much everything revolves around getting off opiates right now and not abusing them to the extent I was before aka making sure I can get out of bed and do stuff without them!!! So yeah just felt like writing a bit. Brain must wake up, beginning of the week. I'm recovering way faster this time, I think because I have been much more physically active than last time when I wasn't ready to deal with this harsh kind of pain and spent about 3 weeks+ just sitting on a couch. So I don't waste so much time anymore, but I need a couple recovery days at the moment where I can lay in bed and watch movies and just start my week in a day or two.
 
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Congrats POkemama that's so awesome for you and groundbreaking for those out here who are still lost and just used something to alter their minds just last night and have no hope they log on and see your post it may be just what they need to hear to give them the push to get help if that's the proper term I think a bit clique and overused but due to lack of a better phrase I'll go with that. So I think it's important for all of us to share our experience bc there's always someone out here who has it a lot worse than we do even if yesterday was rough for us. If we're getting thru just that very day and we're ok and they woke up and got fucked up but didn't want or mean to tech we have more time and experience than them so it's our responsibility even in that sit to not nesseserly help them per se but just share and it's amazing what miracles will happen and like not saying anything when you donate to charity bc it's not about recognition it's about you and your soul same thing with drugs man we're helping people by logging on and posting whatever we're going thru whether it be good or bad and someone will benefit and we'll never know it bc they won't post thanks or shit prob cause they don't even realize how they feel at the time but in the future when their improving or doing super all the sudden they'll think well I remember that post from POkemama and they did it so I did it now I wanna thank them and I have no online access or whatever the fuck life happens man so I think it's so cool we have this forum where the whole planet is chiming in and just sharing and tons of people's lives are improving andcwell never know so keep at it POkemama it gets easier trust me and my ol homie Shroomy dam son I thought my shit was long, lol. I love ya brother keep it up and do what you gotta do you dam sure know where I stand. Yall have a good week:)
 
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