Once I managed to pour about a half gram of coke into my carpet.
This story doesn't end in heartbreak, though, because you can bet I snorted that shit straight outta the carpet!!
Another time, fresh 20bag of coke, and I broke i all up on a CD case in my bathroom. Well, then I took a shower *kicks self* FUcKING DUMBASS
all of the steam condensed around my little pile of white gold, turned it to mush, and made me cry. I tried drying it with a fan, but no luck. I ended up trying to sniff it down, but all that happened was a horrible glob of blow got sent down the back of my throat.
umm, a slightly less heartbreaking (but more ridiculous) story... I once had 4 rolls which made up my entire stash at the time. well, one sad night alone, I took one. then anothr half... then another half. then a whole one, and then fuck it, one left? I'll eat that, too.
Not only was I in a faded state the next day, but I started my second job AND then realized what I'd done.
RIP
EDIT: OH JESUS HOW COULD I FORGET THIS ONE?
my 18th birthday, two of my friends were dispatched to this dealer's house with approx. $200 in hand. They were picking up two ten packs of E so that everyone could party that night.
Well, the dude answered the door, one of my friends handed him the money and stepped in, and about 3 minutes later, 5 county sheriffs knock/bust in.
The dealer got straight FUCKED, and we all lost our pool of $200, but it's a good thing my friends weren't holding it at the time... they were searched, and had they been found with that cash at that house, they would've been screeewed.
I ended up getting acid and good weed that night, though, so it worked out.