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Harm Reduction ya I was shooting Ambien.. (and lost my arm)

shit sorry dude the abszolute nightmare scenario for any iv user. my sincere condolecses
 
Jesus fuck. Reading that from beginning to end really fucked with me. How many of us could that of been?
 
I don't know if the OP still reads this or posts in this thread, but I'm curious if you remember exactly what type of pill it was.

Obviously shooting up pills (even filtered) isn't a great idea, but a lot of people still do it. I had a friend who got a very very serious abscess from IVing one of the blue Ambien CR 12.5mg (usa, first image result when you search for that, they have A~ on them, manufactured by Sanofi-Aventis). I'm wondering if there's a connection and if this pill is especially bad. Because of the extended release formula, it does goop up a lot when added to water.

Here's a list of inactive ingredients in that tablet:

magnesium stearate, microcrystalline cellulose, polyethylene glycol, potassium bitartrate, red ferric oxide, sodium starch glycolate, and titanium dioxide.

All of these are pretty common inactive ingredients in pills - cellulose is particularly bad to inject if it gets into the shot but it's not unique to this formulation.

Also, sorry for what happened to you.
 
slackjack22 said:
I don't know if the OP still reads this or posts in this thread, but I'm curious if you remember exactly what type of pill it was.

Obviously shooting up pills (even filtered) isn't a great idea, but a lot of people still do it. I had a friend who got a very very serious abscess from IVing one of the blue Ambien CR 12.5mg (usa, first image result when you search for that, they have A~ on them, manufactured by Sanofi-Aventis). I'm wondering if there's a connection and if this pill is especially bad. Because of the extended release formula, it does goop up a lot when added to water.

Here's a list of inactive ingredients in that tablet:

magnesium stearate, microcrystalline cellulose, polyethylene glycol, potassium bitartrate, red ferric oxide, sodium starch glycolate, and titanium dioxide.

All of these are pretty common inactive ingredients in pills - cellulose is particularly bad to inject if it gets into the shot but it's not unique to this formulation.

Also, sorry for what happened to you.
Click to expand...
Shooting extended eprelease tablets is al ost always worse than normal release. They have lots more inactive binders and fillers to make them ER.
 
Hi there everybody! I'm not sure if the OP still reads this but I would just like to thank you for caring enough about everyone here and being so selfless to share your story with us. I am so sorry that happened to you (I feel empathy not sympathy for you - I'm sure you probably get tired of hearing people say how sorry they are for you even though it comes from a good place). I too went through some hellish shite when it came to IV drug abuse. I ended us getting MRSA and osteomyelitis (MRSA in your bones) in my right foot. I was very fortunate not to have it amputated, but I came very close.

I was in jail when the pain started and the CO's and "nurses" didn't give 2 Shits about me. They let me suffer in such excruciating pain for like 5 days before finally, after me begging and pleading, taking me to the hospital. I was septic and literally at death's door. I was in the hospital for 6 weeks getting IV vancomycin where I also had 3 surgeries to clean out the infection. After that time I was released and a month and a half later it flared up again.

This time the doctors weren't sure what else they could do without severely hindering my mobility. After another emergency surgery to clean the abscess, an mri showed the osteomyelitis had spread to 6 more bones in my foot. My surgeon sat down with me and my parents and told me we had 2 options either I would have to have it amputated or they could try surgically implanted antibiotic beads in my foot. Obviously I wanted to try everything possible before conceding to the fact I would lose my foot. So I had the surgery, they left the beads in for 3 weeks, and they monitored my progress- while still getting IV antibiotics. After they removed the beads I was in the hospital for another 2 weeks finishing up the antibiotics. Miraculously, to this day I haven't had any more complications, and by the grace of God and my amazing surgeon I got to keep my foot; for now.

This all happened about 8 months ago and I still have nerve and general pain from time to time but nothing like it was. I know my experience cannot even begin to compare, but I also can somewhat understand how you must have felt and feel. It's scary shit, but sometimes we have to live through so much pain before we finally learn our lesson and decide to do something different. I know I did. I am so sorry for your loss, but you do seem to have a very positive attitude about it considering the circumstances.

Stay strong! This battle will get easier each and everyday! Again I am so grateful you decided to share this with us, I'm sure you have saved a lot of people from the same fate. I hope my story will help others as well. If you or anyone ever want to talk, I'm ready and willing to listen! :)
 
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Holy shit... I guess I was away when this happened... I hope progress is still going well with you. I have a lot of friends with combat amputations, and the prosthetic devices have become really good. This thread just made my heart drop to my stomach.

Mods, can we PLEASE get this thread perma-stickied? I can not think of a better example of HR than this ESPECIALLY in OD. I am so great full those days are behind me. I have even shot up ambien twice before. THANK GOD I didn't fuck myself up... God bless you brother... I hope you are doing well I will keep you in my prayers. I don't know if you still browse here. But if you do, you have my condolences.
 
fuzzydoodle - I have a quick ? for you.

If you do not mind my asking and if you know for certain - where and what did you inject that caused your ordeal? If you'd rather not write about it that's very understandable.

I ask as an HR worker at a syringe exchange. I'd like to know more about your case, as we collect as many recent, first hand accounts as we can to demonstrate to people what the consequences of IV-ing can be. We are non-judgemental and do not put this in people faces, rather we possess this knowledge and use discretion in how we communicate this stuff - usually in classes that people voluntarily sign up for to learn more about HR w.r.t IV-ing, both positive and negative info is conveyed. We help teach people proper technique and find good spots for them to inject if they're having difficulty.

The only problem - we cannot afford wheel filters on our shoestring budget of small grants and donations (no federal money - Obama!!! get on it). I think I'll buy a few thousand and donate them. Our intake surveys indicate that only a small fraction of our participants inject pills - it is self-reporting and anonymous, so we can't be certain the numbers are correct. Nonetheless, even if just one person coming in injects pills even once we want them to be as safe as possible. Hence, my desire to get them wheel filters for no cost. We also rely upon our participants to spread the word and that has indeed proven to lower the rates of infection, OD and death from IV use in our area.

Thank you.
 
Mad Dash said:
Mods, can we PLEASE get this thread perma-stickied? I can not think of a better example of HR than this ESPECIALLY in OD.
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Completely agree, something about this thread really just hits home. It really has the 'this could have easily been me' vibe about it, I guess the way it all unfolded in the thread. I honestly think this is the sort of read that will resonate enough with people that some people will reconsider a really poor HR move and possibly save themselves some real agony.
 
Hey speedballs, I'm glad you asked me that! I have no problem sharing my experiences as I hope they will help deter someone else from going through the same Shit. I was shooting street heroin in my arms and hands which eventually, in desperation, led to me shooting in my neck from time to time. I never injected in my foot and the doctors/ nurses did not believe me. It was a strange situation because I first developed an abscess, between my shoulder blades is where it actually came to a head, but the pockets spread across my entire upper back. The "doctor" at the jail drained more than a liter and a half of pus from the wound in one sitting. I was in the medical ward of the jail for 8 days receiving oral bactrim but just a few days later I began having the pain in my foot. My doctor's guess is the bactrim didn't clear the infection and it got into my bloodstream, setting up shop in my right foot. I believe the extreme delay In medical care also allowed for the infection to progress almost to a point of no return. As I said earlier the COs and nurses told me there was nothing wrong with me and basically that I was faking the pain I was experiencing. Honestly I have never felt anything like that before and hope I never have to again. I remember the night before I finally was taken to the hospital, I was screaming and crying and the lieutenant told me if i didnt stop "disturbing the other inmates with my noise and bothering the COs for ibuprofen or ice, he would put me in the hole (isolation). Absolute worst experience of my life, but if I can help someone else not have to endure that or be a shoulder for someone with a similar problem to lean on that would be great!

I think the work you do is awesome and I commend you for it! My area just, finally, passed a law for needle exchanges and I would like to get involved in doing some volunteer work or something to help out.
 
Read the whole thread. Very sad. I hope life has gotten better for you OP, all things considering. And thank you for sharing this story; this will no doubt help members and the readers of this website.
 
Wow. Im so so sorry that happened to you! Sometimes we make bad choices. I really wish you hadn't to pay such a price for yours.
Thoughts go out to you. I know this post is older but I read it and it really makes me feel overwhelmed. I am thankful that needles don't appeal to me.
<3
 
are people saying they actually got a rush/feel from IVing Ambien? I've IV'ed Ambien many times and never got a damn thing besides just the regular "high" you get from the drug; not even instant, just over a matter of time. I was addicted to the needle which is why I was IV'ing this garbage at the time but it was completely useless and just a hassle in general.

gotta learn to stop this, man. took me a while myself but eventually I left the needle for all the "garbage" and just stuck w/ dope for a while. at one point it was ambien, trazadone, suboxone, doxepin, seroquel and anything else.. on top of dope and coke! my arms were garbage man until I gave it all up for months and months before going back to dope. since then its been just dope but even that I managed to get away from over the past 4 months and have stepped away from the needle completely. my arms are finally starting to recover; bruises will be there for life but they look so much better. luckily I am fully covered in tattoos or they would be a lot worse.
 
BostonBrownTown said:
are people saying they actually got a rush/feel from IVing Ambien? I've IV'ed Ambien many times and never got a damn thing besides just the regular "high" you get from the drug; not even instant, just over a matter of time. I was addicted to the needle which is why I was IV'ing this garbage at the time but it was completely useless and just a hassle in general.

gotta learn to stop this, man. took me a while myself but eventually I left the needle for all the "garbage" and just stuck w/ dope for a while. at one point it was ambien, trazadone, suboxone, doxepin, seroquel and anything else.. on top of dope and coke! my arms were garbage man until I gave it all up for months and months before going back to dope. since then its been just dope but even that I managed to get away from over the past 4 months and have stepped away from the needle completely. my arms are finally starting to recover; bruises will be there for life but they look so much better. luckily I am fully covered in tattoos or they would be a lot worse.
Click to expand...

Congrats! I know it has been a hard road. I definitely don't envy you in that way but it sounds like you are in a great place and getting better. Cheers. :)
 
Hey Cavebear ,

i'm really sorry man, i just wanted to write you and say, that first off - I'm a very spiritual / sensitive / intuitive type person--- my deep gut feeling has been right --- every once in awhile i get these feelings--- almost psychic--- its fairly rare, and only pertains to individuals and life events.... anyway i just got a flash.... I get the feeling you are going to bounce back from this, like it sucks now, but perhaps this will be part of your journey. An event painful enough that you sort of turn a corner so to speak and become a more responsible, well adjusted person...

Personally i am a musician, and while i love drugs and basically have done everything heavily at some point, I never injected because music is my life and using my arms fully functioning is more important to me than any drug... Honestly if I lost the ability to play id probably want to end myself..... But just so you are aware, you can still write music with one arm; utilizing technology and a midi keyboard you could make a killer album, or with a loop pedal and a synth you could perform live.... and truth be told - the fact that you have this story to tell and only one arm would make it much easier for you to get noticed.... same if you wanted to do something in public speaking... if you turn your life around , you could give lectures about the dangers of drug abuse and tell your life story....

with every negative comes a positive... when a door closes another opens... turn this into a positive man
 
I never thought I could get teary eyes from reading something on the internet, but your story rustled something inside my stomach.
I am sorry for your loss, CaveBear, and I wish there is something I could do for you, other than learning from this thread and encouraging others to also do so. I guess that stuff like this just has to happen, damned be Murphys laws, eh. I remember doing stupid shit like this and I feel a weird mix of gratitude for still having all my limbs and at the same time a deep sorrow and a tad of guilt for this happening to someone else.
What I would like to say is that I am genuinely sorry for this happening, even though I have never met you. This is the kind of thing the realization of „it could have been me” does to you. I hope one day I will read something that only a happy man could write and that it will be something that you wrote.

And to other BLers... please keep this thread on the front page for a while. Not to point a finger, but because this is a harm reduction forum first.
 
watch the movie about Def Leopard and Rick Allen; he's the drummer who lost his arm in a car crash while drunk/high and still played w/ Def Leopard after learning and overcoming all the bullshit. man, its a terrible loss and something I cannot even imagine, but you can overcome this battle and still live a great life, so dont think negatively. I myself was told I had a brain tumor 3-4 years back; first reaction was continue to abuse dope to the point where I would be dead or alive, it didnt matter. as I fought through the battle I started to see the "light" and find happiness. dont get me wrong, I am still on suboxone/bupe and have used dope, but compared to where I once was both mind/body/soul to where I am now are two different worlds.

I wish you nothing but the best, dude. life is NEVER EASY and always seems to throw that curve ball but I've yet to learn to hit it. I guess we all need some more batting practice.
 
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very sad to read.. this was a HUGE wake up call / reality check to me as I am a sometimes careless IDU. May your story help others in preventing things like happening to others.. all my best to you, bear.
 
Holy shit wow this thread really hit me hard . I hope you know you impacted a lot of people ,and to keep it so calm and together and still update us casually I commend you sir .
Even if I don't know you I'll pray for you and I'm not religious
 
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