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Will this last forever? MDMA comedown

and I still think it's penicillin for the soul. In fact I have a Ferrari Shield here, somewhere... but I will probably let somebody else take it.
There's both positive and negative. In moderation I believe it's safe. In stupid excess, things can become nightmarish :(
 
Whatever works for you. I believe that saving your rolls for an absolutely great experience (Rave, festival concert) [you name it] will make those experiences last and really drown out those negative effects you might feel days afterward.
 
I think it's important that we have a mega thread on this. I too suffered from a long term comedown and BL was instrumental in figuring out what the hell was going on.

I am not anti MDMA. I just had a terrible experience and it was therapeutic for me to come to BL for info and support.

One thing for the mods to consider is maybe making a long term comedown support thread where people can exchange stories and advice.

One thing that initially was upsetting was the vast amounts of "shit I've fucked my brain" threads then the posters would just disappear. That scared me because I thought either they never recovered or lost interest in life.

I learned a lot from BL and I want to pay it forward to give comfort to future people that get bit by E.

To the person who says mind over matter: trust me, this is real. I think my experience was more somatic than physical, regardless I was in pure hell for 3 months and still deal with occasional spells of derealization.

To anyone suffering: you will get better. I thought my world had ended. It didn't. It takes a long long long time but you will come out of it.
 
Dawglaw said:
To anyone suffering: you will get better. I thought my world had ended. It didn't. It takes a long long long time but you will come out of it.
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I know it's real, but the process of healing happens so gradually that I think most people get the idea that their lives are changed forever and thus continue worrying weeks even months after they have fully recovered. Stress can effect pleasure neurochemicals as well. (obviously).

It'd be best to talk about the effects. But you WILL get over anxiety and depression from MDMA use. I feel as though the people who claim to have post-MDMA anxiety and depression 2 months+ from use are the ones that were prone to the conditions to begin with.

Brain zaps, depression, anxiety, fatigue, fogginess, lifelessness. It can be unbearable while it's happening, but the brain is extremely reliant. Exercise, eating right, being social and a good mindset are only going to help you. Attempting to map every little neuron that went wrong during your roll and regretting everything is only going to lead to more grief.
 
Hey guys,

Can't believe I'm posting on NYE, and I really don't want to start the new year in a negative way :(

I'm nearly 7 months into recovery and I'm still suffering from MDMA physical symptoms - these include:

1. head pressure (more so on sides of head, which also causes sinus pressure on the bridge of my nose and roof of my mouth),

2. when I lay down I feel this pulsating feeling run through my body and in the back molars of my teeth (best way to describe it as loose wires zapping)

3. Eye floaters

4. Tinnitus - constant multiple sound ringing.

My history is very minimal - I've done MDMA twice in my life, coke maybe twice and smoked weed a handful in too. So very very minimum. These symptoms were triggered by doing 0.5g of MDMA over 2 days.

I'm really worried that my head pressure won't ever go away. I was told I have minor tmj and I've been doing exercise for them. I don't think my tmj is causing the was pressure as i don't grind my teeth at night. Has anyone has this go away after years? I've been searching and searching for reassurance online but I can't find anyone who's said the head pressure goes away....

For someone who's done so little will I ever return back to normal? Since this has happened I've been going to the gym (45 mins) daily, given up alcohol, I don't smoke and haven't touched drugs or MDMA since. I can't understand why I'm still feeling like this. I'm not suffering from anxiety too, maybe odd bouts here and there but nothing too serious. I only get down occasionally about still having these symptoms and worrying about feeling this head pressure till I die :( - I'm only 24 and I feel as though I've ruined my life! And the worst thing is I just feel so lonely in all of this. :(

Will these symptoms go away completely?

P.s Sorry for repeating myself in different posts too.
 
In the same boat too, if not worse.... Weekly usage for 2 months, culminating in an obscene binge (1.5 grams...) has changed me to say the least. Decrease in cognitive ability is my main worry as I'm a uni student and have assignments due in within a week. HPPD which interferes with reading and concentration-shattering anxiety doesn't help. Hopefully shit'll change in 2013, or i'm fooooked.

On an unrelated note, can anyone hazard a guess as to how much smoking impedes recovery in these situations? I smoke a pack a day and whilst I've incorporated a lot of advice from various bluelight threads into my daily routine (good diet, no drugs, exercise, multivitamins, omega 3 etc.), kicking a nicotine addiction is something I hardly have the mental strength for right now.

Why did i do this to myself?!?!?!? I'm SO. FUCKING. ANGRY. AHHHHH!

.... happy new year guys xx
 
I really think most of the ED moderators have always been pro MDMA. Which is a dangerous thing because they belittle the problems people experience. I always hear how do you know it is caused directly from MDMA? and i want to face palm. Maybe because people aren't retarded and they know the difference between before and after...cause and effect. Eh i'm over it, as long as i know i'm not gonna roll anymore i can only get better.
 
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dpd_mnk92 said:
In the same boat too, if not worse.... Weekly usage for 2 months, culminating in an obscene binge (1.5 grams...) has changed me to say the least. Decrease in cognitive ability is my main worry as I'm a uni student and have assignments due in within a week. HPPD which interferes with reading and concentration-shattering anxiety doesn't help. Hopefully shit'll change in 2013, or i'm fooooked.

On an unrelated note, can anyone hazard a guess as to how much smoking impedes recovery in these situations? I smoke a pack a day and whilst I've incorporated a lot of advice from various bluelight threads into my daily routine (good diet, no drugs, exercise, multivitamins, omega 3 etc.), kicking a nicotine addiction is something I hardly have the mental strength for right now.

Why did i do this to myself?!?!?!? I'm SO. FUCKING. ANGRY. AHHHHH!

.... happy new year guys xx
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Smoking shouldn't really hinder your recovery much, unless you experience anxiety while smoking. If your smoking weed like i was all through the recovery, i find it hinders recovery. It made HPPD symptoms worse as well as anxiety and basically everything much much worse.
 
F1n1shed said:
Smoking shouldn't really hinder your recovery much, unless you experience anxiety while smoking. If your smoking weed like i was all through the recovery, i find it hinders recovery. It made HPPD symptoms worse as well as anxiety and basically everything much much worse.
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How have you been recovering for? I have been a huge pot-head for 3 years and it's weird going completely clean. The few times I have smoked haven't necessarily increased anxiety, but it's just been nowhere near as enjoyable as it used to be. Definitely made HPPD + tinnitus a hell of a lot worse. I'm still in complete disbelief about this overall situation... Based on the rate of current recovery, it seems I will never come close to what I used to be. Really hard to come to terms with.
 
dpd_mnk92 said:
How have you been recovering for? I have been a huge pot-head for 3 years and it's weird going completely clean. The few times I have smoked haven't necessarily increased anxiety, but it's just been nowhere near as enjoyable as it used to be. Definitely made HPPD + tinnitus a hell of a lot worse. I'm still in complete disbelief about this overall situation... Based on the rate of current recovery, it seems I will never come close to what I used to be. Really hard to come to terms with.
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Well my recovery has been weird because i have still been doing other drugs in that time so its hard to tell man. Haven't rolled in over a year at least, that's for sure. But i went on to heroin, and meth sometimes, xanax. It's all been a cluster fuck, im totally clean off everything now and still feel like shit. I don't know if its because i haven't been doing anything with my life or MDMA affects still lingering. All i know is out of all the drugs i've done, MDMA took ages to recover off of (total doses maybe 30ish).
 
F1n1shed said:
Well my recovery has been weird because i have still been doing other drugs in that time so its hard to tell man. Haven't rolled in over a year at least, that's for sure. But i went on to heroin, and meth sometimes, xanax. It's all been a cluster fuck, im totally clean off everything now and still feel like shit. I don't know if its because i haven't been doing anything with my life or MDMA affects still lingering. All i know is out of all the drugs i've done, MDMA took ages to recover off of (total doses maybe 30ish).
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ey man...even in your last years the recovery goes on? i mean...recovery never stops?
 
Hello everyone;

first of all, sorry for my english. i hope you all will understand.

I'm having a terrible comedown. I took 3 mdma pills on 31december, i guess its like at least 350mg. The night was very good and didnt have any anxiety/panic-attack. But the next day i felt horrible, whenever i moved my eye it was like my brain was resetting itself. but i could live with that. after 4 or 5 days something happened that i still cant describe. it was like a electric shock moving from top of my brain. It totally freaked me out and i felt paranoid, my heart was pounding very very fast. i got scared from every single voice and had some really weird paranoid ideas, it was like i wrote a story of terror and lived it in my brain. until then i never stopped thinking that i will have a attack again, and fucked up my life. i feel like its not me, and when i look to my hands i feel like they arent mine. my heart hardly stop pounding really hard. i can never focus on something.

one week ago i started taking multivitamin and 2 days ago i bought 5-htp. for the last two days i felt better, i could think of something different than anxiety at least. but today im feeling very bad again, having really weird thoughts and very lonely.

will it last for months? or forever? i have never been so unhappy in my life. last week i had to travel long way in a bus, and i just didnt go and missed a really important chance just because i feel scared.

for my drug background, i think that was my 6th experience on mdma, i usually took one. and im 20 years old.

i would really appreciate any help, advise. i think that it will last forever, i totally messed up with my brain forever. when i read your posts its a slight relief, but still, i cant get that thought out my head.

Thanks.
 
F1n1shed said:
Well my recovery has been weird because i have still been doing other drugs in that time so its hard to tell man. Haven't rolled in over a year at least, that's for sure. But i went on to heroin, and meth sometimes, xanax. It's all been a cluster fuck, im totally clean off everything now and still feel like shit. I don't know if its because i haven't been doing anything with my life or MDMA affects still lingering. All i know is out of all the drugs i've done, MDMA took ages to recover off of (total doses maybe 30ish).
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Good to hear you're clean - definitely sounds like a wise move if you're still feeling off these days.

Can definitely relate to not knowing if my state is an effect of the MDMA or not doing anything with my life. For me, as I'm probably still in quite an early stage of recovery, it is probably a mix of both. The physiological aspect is something which looks like it can potentially resolve itself (to a large degree, at least) through abstinence and health living. The not doing anything part, both before and after drug use, is probably an important part of recovery which we can have an active involvement in.

Cognitively, it seems to me that not doing anything over the last couple of years while immersed in the world of drugs has set me back as much as the drugs have (through uni non-attendance, lack of interest in anything other than getting high on something etc) by simply not exercising my brain. Whilst students all around me having been getting smarter, it feels like I've been going backwards. Whilst the body is doing what it can to repair itself internally, I reckon a lot can simultaneously be done to aid the process through your own proactive actions (by doing some problem solving, writing exercises, reading more etc). Same goes for psychological symptoms I would imagine. The brain rewiring + restoring its chemical balance will reduce anxiety to a point, but actually getting out there and forcing myself to break out of negative thought patterns, trying hard not to isolate myself from people etc- habits that have been ingrained during and after my drugs use - seems just as important. Following through on some of these ideas feels pretty god damn impossible at times though, I have to say.

Good luck buddy
 
Exercise, a good diet + plenty of rest will help you immensely.

You could do a search on some of First Bad Comedown's posts. His information and advice is both detailed and easy to understand.

1adream said:
i would really appreciate any help, advise. i think that it will last forever, i totally messed up with my brain forever. when i read your posts its a slight relief, but still, i cant get that thought out my head.

Thanks.
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Hi guys

I am having a similar expirience.
I have consumed mdma 3 times in my life. One in dec 2014 other in june 2015 and the last one in august 2015.
In the last time i put about 200 mg.
Two days after i start feeling some anxiety and lack of interest in doing things. In the last four weeks i have ups and downs.
In the begining i couldnt eat and i have been vomits and diarrea. About these two last simptoms i am fine now.

I would like to know if This Is normal. I want to feel hapy and fine again. The last week i have been fine but now i am worsw again.

Sorry for bad english
 
vascosn said:
Hi guys

I am having a similar expirience.
I have consumed mdma 3 times in my life. One in dec 2014 other in june 2015 and the last one in august 2015.
In the last time i put about 200 mg.
Two days after i start feeling some anxiety and lack of interest in doing things. In the last four weeks i have ups and downs.
In the begining i couldnt eat and i have been vomits and diarrea. About these two last simptoms i am fine now.

I would like to know if This Is normal. I want to feel hapy and fine again. The last week i have been fine but now i am worsw again.

Sorry for bad english
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Hi, welcome to the forum!
Did you test what you took? Are you sure it was MDMA?

It could take up to a month to feel normally again, it's normal for some people (some comedowns are worst than others).
Just live a healthy life for a bit, eat well, sleep well, spend time in the sun and try to relax.

If you still have issues, you should visit this thread for information and support for other members http://www.bluelight.org/vb/threads/759049-MDMA-Recovery-(Stories-amp-Support-3)

Good luck and I hope you feel better soon!
 
I didnt test it but the high was good.
I think This could be a little psichological too.
I just want to talk with other people who have the same expirience, blecause sometimes i found myself thinking if This will last forever
 
vascosn said:
I didnt test it but the high was good.
I think This could be a little psichological too.
I just want to talk with other people who have the same expirience, blecause sometimes i found myself thinking if This will last forever
Click to expand...
This thread is probably what you're looking for
 
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