Will this last forever? MDMA comedown

[derok]

First of all , sorry my bad english, actually i speak spanish and this is the only page in internet where i could find similar simptons like me. i wrote this to FBC but i want to share it with you all too, need some opinion and any advice will be wellcome.
Well, i dont know if you have enought time to read some tips about my last months, i found you one of the most strongers persons in the world if you had lived what you had lived (and i have experienced more o less, maybe not so worst)

Im a engineerin student, i had a nice life before all this.. :S i dont know how to deal with it.
It began 5 months ago, i was doing the last 6 mont maybe 10 time mdma, in small amounts of less than 100 mg, in 3 weeks periods maximum, but was the last time, the next day after sleepin, i woke up fine, but in the evening my hearths pounds more than never, y felt upset, and the upsetting was going on over the last 5 months, ALL day with contiunous non stop extreme anxiety, from the beggining till sometimes 4 hour post sleep (i wasnt able to do till 2 moths ago btw), and it took me to depression.

I dont know what to do know, i had to admiit i was thinking a lot of time on suicide, mi GP prescribe me lexapro 20mg , that im tryin to go off today cause i dont want to be everyday med-dependant. I had gone to psicologist too try to do all that i cant, but im not sure that if its helping really, althought i enjoy the conversation.

Some simptons: teeth tremblin, finger tremblin, jaw pain (in the first months was really heavy),brain zaps along the day(fading maybe with the months, i had a few today in the left back my head) , i found my own voice more humble than i used too even if a want to increase the loud and of course stomachache when im anxious.
Sex was ok (only fucked with the lexapro, but im working even with it), and my vision too.

My Gp said that my brain its ok, im sure its not as she thought.

Said this, i have just one question, if dont think anyway in the idea of end my life at 22 years...what can i do, im just waking up thinkin "is this a good day or...:S " "can this go away?"i cant study in that way, cant do any routine.
Even with my gf...she is with me, but i really think she deserves a happy guy, and not a brainfucked like me now, i can give anything to her...but i try to smile everyday.

Im really scared to wake up everyday :S is like a nightmare...

thanks to steal some of your time, i will continue reading your post, you takes me the idea im not so fucked than i thougt firstly.

best regards,

Carlos

///////////////////////// NEWS 22-11-2012 /////////////////////77

Okay...maybe a lot of gUys like me are readin the text before are they are goin crazy cause pesismist, in sum up:
-I recovered from anxiety and could stop meds, my voice is the same, my sex too ( fucked one time because the meds), i can feel happiness, enjoy music and so on. I can study, and work. i take everyday omega3 but its because its healthy anyway .
-i get bruxismus , that maybe i hadbefore ( but no so agresive) maybe its forever, i know...but its ok , im trying to get a mouth guard , 20% of the people have it. you were anxious too before (perhaps not so hard), im a little bit more anxious than before...brain zaps every month are less and less and so on....
-Please...ask me if you need support in your way of recovery, i do, im doing , and u will do .

 

[futura2012]

Hello Carlos

Thanks for posting welcome to Bluelight. Just like you I discovered Bluelight in the same way you have.

Sorry to hear about the awful situation you are in.

Many of us here are experiencing the same as you so know exactly what you are going through.

Please dont worry about your English your message is loud and clear and your English seems fine to me.

Regardless of your English everyone is here to help you. Definitely dont worry about that..


The first thing I must say is this:

ENDING YOUR LIFE IS CRAZY AS YOU ARE GOING TO RECOVER 100% GUARANTEED!!

AT 22 YOU ARE SO YOUNG YOU HAVE SO MUCH MORE TO LIVE FOR.

You will see post after post soon confirming this.

Please read that statement again and again as I promise you I speak the truth.


I have personally been through one of these awful long term comedowns I know exactly what you are feeling but I can also guarantee the awful feeling of dread, worry, horror, I have ruined my life etc etc.. eventually goes away.

All of this is simply a chemical imbalance. It will go away in time.

Think about the weird thoughts you have on a short term comedown the thoughts are illogical. They make no sense. The drugs / chemical imbalance are doing the reasoning here its all in the mind.


PLEASE FOR ALL OF US DO NOT ENTERTAIN ENDING YOUR LIFE.

THERE IS GOOD TO COME I PROMISE YOU THIS.

YOU WILL GET BACK TO YOUR OLD SELF.


Reading your post I am a little unclear about your history of drug taking. Doses, frequency of use etc.

Also can you explain exactly what you took the night before you woke up feeling this way?

When you say MDMA was this in powder 'Molly' crystal or was it pills you have taken? Do you know what the pills are?

Are you sure you have taken MDMA and not something else? was the powder or pills tested?

Is there a possibility you could have taken a Piperazine? such as BZP?



Reading your symptoms they sound very familiar.

I had lowered voice, limited speech, bad memory, trembling teeth, trembling hands, trembling feet, anxiety, paranoia, panic attacks, insomnia, feelings of dread, memory loss, confusion.

All of these symptoms will go as soon as you restore an equal balance to your system.


Please come back with a bit more detail about your drug taking and members will very soon give you suggestions how to get better with recommended suppliments and benefit to make yourself well again.


If you ever need someone to talk to just feel free to PM me and I will give you my Skype username. I am on skype most days and always available to chat.

Hang in there Carlos. Be safe okay.

Futura

 

[masterdome]

Don't listen to that "humble" voice you are hearing. That is the voice of the MDMA comedown.
It is the voice that will lead you to self harm and anxiety. That is not your voice. Develop your self esteem. Be tough. I get through these many times a year. Exercise, meditate, eat well, get sun...talk to people and smile. Force yourself to do these things and you can get better than normal .

 

[derok]

First of all i have to say thanks to both of you for such a useful answers.
About my drug history, i began tankin mdma 6 months ago from this comedown, the first time was 100mg, the next time only a week later, then i decided to keep a time separation of 3 weeks minimum to give my head time to recover.

About the material, always Molly powder, between 100mg and 200mg never more (never 100% pure and always sharin the molly bag half gram 5 heads),surely tested , it always contained mdma , but i dont know the other part of the mix, to add i must say that my friends take always the same molly as me, the repeat every weekend, not me. Never mix with alcochol, in this 6 months time onle try twice magic mushroom i grew myself,certificated of course jeje, but no more than this.

This was 10 times, the last one was fine, but i felt paranoid, but happy in the same way, more heat that i used to, and strange sensation of "something is going wrong", but no anxiety, not takikardia...just a regular roll maybe.

Tday im on lexapro 15 mg, hate secondary effects for sure...my emotional state is like a rollecoaster 2 weeks better, 1 week little worse, brain zaps decreasing, tremblin hands and teeth decreasing too, and less jaw pain (sometime i didnt notice this ).

My main question is effect of lexapro, or effect of the balancing process in my head, i cant imagine myself tankin meds everyday :S.

Thanks in advance mates

 

[futura2012]

Hello Carlos

Just to clarify.

You have been clean for 5 months. (taken no drugs at all)

Then you started taking MDMA 6 months before your comedown began.

So effectively started taking MDMA 11 months ago for the first time. You then went on a 6 month binge period taking a total of 10 hits at approx 100mG - 200mG per hit. Spaced out in approx 3 week intervals. Two musroom hits also some time in this 6 month period.

The MDMA hits you took was always the same powder. You suspect it might have been cut with something

The time you got affected you felt yourself getting hotter than usual. made you feel paranoid. Then you woke the following day feeling 'not quite right' and everything then started from there.

Is there anyway you could get access to this powder and test it for piperazine or any other cut? Reagent test.

By doing this you can find out what caused this allergic reaction. Sounds to me like possibley not MDMA but perhaps the cut with the MDMA? Finding out is good because at least then you know what you are allergic to. Piperazines for me have always been the trigger BZP.


Re the lexapro which is an SSRI. The antidepressants are different for everyone.

FBC for example would advise you against taking SSRIs as they cause down regulation of seretonin receptors. There is a valid point to this. I always read this guys posts with open eyes.

Personally I would focus more on if you feel the SSRI is releiving you of your condition. If you are having suicidal thoughts then the SSRI may well be making your condition worse. Most antidepressants take a good few weeks to work so bare this in mind when making these decisions.

I am currently trying Mirtazapine and I have been on that for 10 days now. So far I have yet to feel any benefit from them. I have decided after 28 days if I feel nothing I will stop taking them. Mirtazapine is a different type of antidepressant NaSSA Class.

To be honest Carlos I would recommend you discuss this aspect of your antidepressants with your appointed health care professional.

If you are feeling suicidal then the choice of taking or not taking an antidepressant at this point is a very critical decision I would hate to make this call for you and get it wrong.

Anti depressants can cause suicidal thoughts and make things worse. Bare this in mind in your decision making.

When I took an SSRI antidepressant which was Citralopram I didnt get on with it too well. So far my own personal experience of antidepressants hasnt been very successful.

Other advise is when you start taking antidepressants you need to be around people you trust. Long periods of time alone is not a good idea. Whilst the antidepressant takes effect they can give you all kinds of crazy ideas.

In an ideal world taking no antidepressant I think is best for quickest recovery but you have to way this up against your suicidal thoughts.

Taking an antidepressant for some time is a small price to pay if it keeps you in a stable enough mind state to not actually do this kind of action.

Please clarify if I have your drug history correct. This will help other members when advising you.

Try and get that powder tested if possible.

take care

keep in touch

futura

 

[coolzmoker]

Carlos, the comedown is when the drug leaves your body, so it's not really a come down. But that's a technicality.

You've done something, it has back-fired. As a result of that you're in a place in your life right now, where there's only one thing you can do. And that's work to get better! I know the feeling that life itself can be scary, but when you think about it, it's actually not. It's just a bunch of people, we're all here trying to have a good life together. You have a girlfriend, friends who like you (and if you don't I'm SURE you can easily find some), and you're working to get an education that will earn you a good living. When you feel scared, at least it must be a little consolation to realize that it's actually not scary, it's just your brain that makes you feel that way right now.

It will certainly get better - the symptoms will diminish, you will become better at handling it, you will develop yourself. And in the end you're a stronger person for it. Even if it lasts for years, you will discover ways to deal with it and have a joyful life until the symptoms go away. The most important thing is that you don't hide from it, that's the hardest thing, but also what will get you out of it the fastest. If you hide from the anxiety, your life will go in the wrong direction, so you need to learn how to be okay with it, but keep fighting it.

And of course... You already know this, but never touch that drug again ever. You shouldn't touch any others either.

And one more thing! DON'T be disappointed in yourself when anxiety wins over you, noone else could have done it in your shoes either, you just try again. The important thing is to keep trying and not give up, and realize that the scaryness is really an illusion.

The best cure against depression is to get a lot of experiences. Depression can be a downwards spiral, because once the brain starts becoming depressed, it also loses interest in doing anything at all, which leads to more depression. Do SOMETHING new every day, doesn't have to be anything major, but make a point of doing something new every day. In time you can get more creative with these things, and more brave. Even if you feel it's not working, just do it and try to experience it as intensely as you can.

Proper diet and sleep are also essential. You need 3 healthy, nutricious meals a day, and regular, consistent sleep!

Good luck, and remember there's always lots of love right here on bluelight

 

[creeepah]

its already been said countless times but IT GETS BETTER! Trust me I have been through similar situations where you lose hope but eventually you pull through. Try eating foods high in tryptophan, such as eggs, milk, bananas, marmite sandwiches on wholemeal bread, turkey...it all helps trust me! Good luck mate let us know how you get on

 

[derok]

Don't listen to that "humble" voice you are hearing. That is the voice of the MDMA comedown.
It is the voice that will lead you to self harm and anxiety. That is not your voice. Develop your self esteem. Be tough. I get through these many times a year. Exercise, meditate, eat well, get sun...talk to people and smile. Force yourself to do these things and you can get better than normal .

i had read here that you use SSRI to solve anxiety/depression mdma related issues, could you give how it was? maybe in a old post you wrote time ago? thanks

To futura:

I have found this on the usually place e-peolple check thir MDMA, http://energycontrol.org/analisis-de-sustancias/resultados/adulterantes.html , the list indicate that bzp is the 5º adulterant of pills and molly here so is posible i had comsumed a mdma mixed with this in more than one time, often when you test e here they only have markis test, a full analysis could be too much expensive for a NGO.



From the beginin i said to myself i will do everything that i could so do, because i understand thats this issue is not a clinical depression or anxiety, i think, dont know if mistaken or not, that is a different disease, and is not gonna be chronic like i have read in whole internet anxiety and depression not drug induced reports.
First of all, i begn to take lexapro 20 mg and trozodone to sleep properly, 20 days form the crisis, lot of fruit, meat, fish, vegeteables, and omega 3 from fish 200mg every day morning and evening.On third month i left trozodone because i could sleep very well 5 h in a row. 1 month ago i downed lexapro to 15mg and thats it the only that i take every day with the omega3.
Today im feeling almost 100% but every 2 weeks more or less feel little anxious in the mornings but not the whole day like i used to, . DOnt know if lexapro is doing something wrong in my head, but i can say that i havent more suicide thoughts than before, even i could say i feel more confident with myself to go on fighting.

My main fears are the jaw pain, that it does and comes every 2 weeks or so, and the idea of i could have anxiety forever, or i will be med dependant in the same way. i have never like the "chronic" problems, makes me feel like a handicapped guy for the rest of my life.

today: feelin anxiety every 2 weeks , 2 days in a row, only in the morning, feel little teeth trembling, my hands tremble a few, is really unnoticeable when i take a book for example. less needing to move my legs all the time when im sitted. Little jaw pain sometimes, every 2 weeks is more noticeable. And the scary seconday effects of lexapro in my sexual life(but i realized that with less mg of lexapro it going better..:S) less brain zaps in my brain left hemisphery, only it i focus my concentration in that place.

 

[masterdome]

I have been on both SSRIs and benzos since my return from an overseas deployment to Afghanistan. I have spent ten years (on and off) in various types of therapy for PTSD, anxiety and depression. These symptoms appeared independent of MDMA use. However, my MDMA use hasn't helped many of these symptoms and in 2004, It aggrevated my anxiety somewhat.

Two years ago i made the decision to not take psychiatric medication. I felt i had lost touch with what my true Self is. I went through a year of withdrawal type problems. Almost lost my lover during it all. Today, i feel back in touch with who i really am. I feel "real."

My nightmares from the Marines are more intense these days but i am finding i am reacting better to triggers. My mood is good. I never want to take psych meds again. They made me lose myself. I would write and explain more but i am sick and typing on a cell phone.

 

[futura2012]

Really interesting post masterdome. I am currently on Mirtazapine which seems to be having very little effect to be honest.

Its interesting to hear how an experience like this can be the trigger for Anxiety, depression and PTSD and in your case the drugs werent the trigger. Extreme experiences instead.

A lot of my issues stem around my nerves being shot.

I am sure there is a close link between hammering your nerves with drugs and when your nerves are pushed to the extreme like in a war situation.

I am currently evaluating about what I should do about my ad medication mirtazapine. Been on them now for 11 days and seriously think i might axe taking them.

To be honest so far they just make me feel weird. Thats the only description I can think of.

Your post has been very useful to read.

Thanks.


Hows things with you today Carlos?

 

[derok]

today: feelin anxiety every 2 weeks , 2 days in a row, only in the morning, feel little teeth trembling, my hands tremble a few, is really unnoticeable when i take a book for example. less needing to move my legs all the time when im sitted. Little jaw pain sometimes, every 2 weeks is more noticeable. And the scary seconday effects of lexapro in my sexual life(but i realized that with less mg of lexapro it going better..:S) less brain zaps in my brain left hemisphery, only it i focus my concentration in that place.
Again dont know if my improvements is the result of antidepressant or my own brain rewirin itself...but at least i can say that lexapro are not going me back in cause i felt everyday better from the first month taking it.

but was about you ,futura? how is it going? did you felt something wrong in time before your "comedown"? something i felt was little teeth tremblin but i thought was normal, and not a anxiety issue, i felt normal mood all time? in your first comedown teeth issueds went away? i hope you'll fine better everyday -

Masterdome is really awesome to read you had left meds and you are finding yourself...ill go that way, im totally aware that i want to be free of antidepressants

 

[masterdome]

I found that the meds made me suicidal and they affected my sex drive and self esteem adversely. I feel whole again. The emptiness that was inside of me is filling back up. I now have goals and things to live for.

 

[futura2012]

I have definitely clocked what masterdome is saying. Its a very valid point. Very interesting to hear the connection between MDMA and PTSD

Currently I am on day 11 of mirtazapine. Unlike the SSRIs it does not effect my sex drive.

I think living in the modern world and pretty much any problem we have experienced up until now there is usually a cure for it.

I am starting to think the cure in this case is not the cure we have come to always expect. Ie a medical cure.

Something inside me is saying these meds are not the answer. I feel kinda weird, unsettled and not convinced the final feeling of this will be quite the answer I am expecting.

Difficult to say Carlos what is antidepressant and what is natural curing.

I would say think carefully about the SSRIs. Some users on here dont rate them including FBC.

Re my first comedown thinking back.. it was a time in my life where I was dating a girl into drugs so the month before my comedown I had been on x2 MDMA binges and taken coke roughly every weekend.

Thinking back I think I was likely a bit more anxious than normal before my horrow trip. No shaking symptoms but definitely low due to drug abuse.

The horror trip was at a party called Bestival on the Isle of Wight. I took maybe 8-12 pills over a 3 day party
and some mdma powder. In the last hour of the party i was given a pill which i later found out to be BZP.

Couldnt sleep then for approx 2 days.

I eventually slept. I woke up and the feeling of horror started.

It took almost to the day exactly 6 months to go.

The first time round I ignored the symptoms and lived life as normal. I think this is very important in your recovery. To try and be normal as possible. It seems the more horror stories you read the worse it gets.

My come down this time is much worse but it will go away eventually its just going to take longer this time.

The shaking hands etc is horrible but it is only an imbalance. I personally think the shaking is dopamine related. It will go after time.

Try if you can not to think about it too much. You have it, it will go, when we dont know, but it will go away over time. TRUST ME.

 

[derok]

Today im feelin anxiety in the morning , but not all days, sometimes jaw pain 5 days more or less ( i mean is bruxism, it wont go i think ) and apathy all time but improve in the night when i feel more "me".
I have gone to germany to go on studies but im not sure i could deal with all pressure, or i just need some relax to recover...
Teeth and hands tremblin already exist, i dont know if with the same intensity but exist (somebody know it that will go?)

Im on lexapro 15mg, somebody knows if i leave it i will feel terror? or full anxiety like the first month? somedoby have cured himself with ssri? bluelighters recommend me to leave ssri like that, my gp think is not neurotoxicity related, she think is a "normal" comedown related with my psycology. i dont know what to trust know....somebody said too that ssri increase neurotrofic factor so you can rewired more quickly...really awful that 10 times of mdma 150 mg did this to me, and the last time fucked me forever. fucked in just 6 months....so unbelieveable.

PD: i feel some pain or pressure when i push my skull in the brain zaps place...do you know what this means? i touh different places i didnt feel nothing, only in that place (everyday brain zaps are going out..even with the meds, i still feel something )

 

[crazydiamond79]

Derok,
MDMA comedowns can be horrible, I have seen it firsthand with a friend, after a night of some Sass/Molly, he was a complete wreck the next day, I mean to the point where he was suicidal as well. I did my best o try and comfort him and talk him down, that it was only the comedown. Try spacing your MDMA use apart, or you will lose the magic it holds. It also sounds like maybe you didn't have very good MDMA, by that, I mean perhaps it was cut with something not so good, or perhaps it wasn't MDMA, but a Piperzine or something. The best advice I can give you is, it won't last forever, you will get back to normal. I recommend after you roll, take 2 5HTP caps before you go to bed, they help your brain start to re-regulate the serotonin regularly. It wouldn't hurt to take it supplementally daily perhaps, but if you are on prescribed meds, please consult your physician before doing so. It will be alright brother. PLUR

***i have also experienced firsthand SSRI medications that were prescribed made me feel suicidal, and I never ever felt that way. So a lot of it could be due to that as well. Again, I am not a medical doctor, but have a lot of experience with this area, especially anxiety disorders. PLUR

 

[mcmayo3]

Hello everyone, I am new to bluelight and this is my first post. The reason I made an account is because I am struggling with the same issue that you are all having.

Exactly 6 months ago I tried mdma powder for the first time. I parachuted 100 mg at a concert. I am pretty sure I experienced a normal roll until later that night I had a horrible panic/anxiety attack. I got no sleep and I had a severe headache the next day.

Unfortunately I am still suffering from painful headaches daily along with other symptoms such as depression, anxiety, blurred vision, jaw pain, and neck pain.

I am 18 years old and was a biology major at college but the pain has been so debilitating that I have dropped out. I have issues with memory and concentration along with the severe pain. I have also lost my job and I cannot bring myself to socialize with friends.

I have had MRI/MRA/EEG/X-ray/blood pressure/ and several other tests and they all came up normal. Medications I have been prescribed over time for relief include Ativan, Baclofen, Amitriptalline, and Topomax. Ativan worked very well with my pain but after using it for a month I was dependent on it so I had to go through the painful process of weening off. My GP prescribed baclofen because he read mdma can cause neck muscle issues but that was just a waste of 2 months. I have been on amitriptalline 50 mg for 2 months and it has helped dull the pain but I am still suffering. I just started Topomax but I am not looking forward to increasing my dose and I just feel medication cannot fix my issue.

I have also tried chiropractic and acupuncture treatment, which was a useless waste of money.

My depression is gradually getting worse. I have thought alot about suicide and there are times I feel so horrible that I cut myself. I am seeing therapists and psychiatrists which definitely helps with the depression/anxiety but not so much with the pain.

Prior to trying ecstasy I had little drug history, I would smoke weed and drink socially on weekends. I always have had baseline anxiety but I never had severe headaches or depression.

I am greatly relived that there are other people in my position and I really hope we can all work our ways out of this mess! Any comments or suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

 

[futura2012]

Hello Mcmayo

Welcome to bluelight sorry we meet under nasty circumstances.

Exactly 6 months ago I tried mdma powder for the first time. I parachuted 100 mg at a concert. I am pretty sure I experienced a normal roll until later that night I had a horrible panic/anxiety attack. I got no sleep and I had a severe headache the next day.

Was the product tested? This sounds like the hallmarks of piperazine/mdma combo. How did you measure the dose?

I am 18 years old and was a biology major at college but the pain has been so debilitating that I have dropped out. I have issues with memory and concentration along with the severe pain. I have also lost my job and I cannot bring myself to socialize with friends.

I know exactly how you feel dont worrey. You have lost for now but you can get all this back as soon as you get better.

I have had MRI/MRA/EEG/X-ray/blood pressure/ and several other tests and they all came up normal.

They always do. The issue here is the hospital have no refernce source. Your heart beat etc may well be within normal range but what often gets overlooked is it still doesnt mean things arent right. If your heart beat raises by a tiny fraction it could be the difference between sleep and no sleep.

I have had MRI/MRA/EEG/X-ray/blood pressure/ and several other tests and they all came up normal. Medications I have been prescribed over time for relief include Ativan, Baclofen, Amitriptalline, and Topomax. Ativan worked very well with my pain but after using it for a month I was dependent on it so I had to go through the painful process of weening off. My GP prescribed baclofen because he read mdma can cause neck muscle issues but that was just a waste of 2 months. I have been on amitriptalline 50 mg for 2 months and it has helped dull the pain but I am still suffering. I just started Topomax but I am not looking forward to increasing my dose and

I would personally get off all this shit asap. GPs scuse the French dont know shit about drug related issues.

I just feel medication cannot fix my issue.

Follow your gut instinct.

I have also tried chiropractic and acupuncture treatment, which was a useless waste of money.

Your symptoms sound too severe for this.

My depression is gradually getting worse. I have thought alot about suicide and there are times I feel so horrible that I cut myself. I am seeing therapists and psychiatrists which definitely helps with the depression/anxiety but not so much with the pain.

I know exactly where you are. I must assure you now if you make all the right moves in the next few months you WILL get out of this. You are so young please dont do anything more that will harm you.

You have new friends now that love you and are in the same place

Please PM me I will give you my skype name and you can txt me anytime you feel this way. No more harm okay

We are going to get you out of this mess just have some faith. Remove those thoughts from your head.

Prior to trying ecstasy I had little drug history, I would smoke weed and drink socially on weekends. I always have had baseline anxiety but I never had severe headaches or depression.

Are you male or female? what country are you from? is there any history of mental illness in your family?

Your drug history is good. have you ever taken stimulants before like meth or coke?

I am greatly relived that there are other people in my position and I really hope we can all work our ways out of this mess! Any comments or suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

We will get you out of this mess. Derok who started this thread is now almost recovered. I speak with him on skype. He is going to come on here soon and report his recovery. Hang in there mcmayo. Let me know about my questions.

All the best my friend

Futura x

 

[cope]

hello mcmayo,

welcome to bluelight.

i am too experiencing this at the moment. its now exactly 5 month ago that happened to me.

it is really painful and it can take some time before you will feel normal again.

time is the biggest healer in that regard.

the neck pain did go away for me at month 3, compared to when this all started the headaches are getting a little better too.

i have done much more x than you and what triggered this for me was a piperazine pill.

i have researched a lot on the net for similar cases, and i found many reports saying it gets better with time.

use the search function of bluelight if you want to read more into it, but i found it is better not to obsess about it to much.

what to do now:

eat healthy,
exercise,
go to bed early, have a good sleep,
avoid all substances including alcohol

since you took only 100mg for one time, i am positive you will recover eventually

if you can, try to go through this without medication.

i hope you will be better soon.

there is hope:

http://www.bluelight.ru/vb/threads/524044-will-i-come-back-to-normal?p=8774515&viewfull=1#post8774515

best of luck and keep us updated

 

[mcmayo3]

Wow you guys are awesome! The advice you have given me has given me more hope than everything the doctors and therapists have said combined.

Ok so to answer your questions:

Regrettably I did not test the product. I purchased a half gram and split it into five "equal" parts. I saw the dealer scale out the .5grams but I did not use a scale to separate it. I shared the powder with 4 other friends and none of them suffered from any of the issues I did. I still keep in touch with them and they are all fine but I would not be surprised if my dose was cut with something.

I am an 18 year old guy from the US. I do have a family history of schizophrenia, which worries me because my schizophrenic uncle was pretty normal until he had a traumatic experience that triggered his symptoms.

I have never tried meth or coke and I certainly don't plan on it. I tried shrooms once but I had a pretty good experience, no anxiety or negativity. Still, this is a big wake up call to me so my experimenting days are over.

One thing I have noticed that seems to be helping is taking vitamins and mineral supplements. I take a multivitamin every morning and supplements of magnesium and vitamin B6.

Thank you so much for your help I am in a much better state of mind now :D futura Ill be sure to pm you

Good luck to all of you!

 

[futura2012]

hello mcmayo

Thanks for your straight up reply.

Next question is can you tell me what speed you came up on the drugs compared to your buddies who also took the same drug?

Was your come up time slower than theirs? I have spoken to users before who have been with friends and the one who suffers seems to be the one who takes the long time to come up. This often indicates you have a slow metabolism.

Another theory is one of your enzymes particularly the CYP2D6 might be weaker than normal. This is one of the enzymes that break down many of the drugs we take. MDMA has this nasty habbit of inhibiting this enzyme but also at the same time the enzyme is needed to break it down. It effectively strangles the enzyme whilst it is frantically trying to break the MDMA down. Under normal conditions this is fine but if you genetically have weaker P450 enzymes this can be an issue.

I dont know for sure if either of these theories may be correct in your case but there is a high possibility why you have reacted in this way.

basically some how the drug has remained in your system too long and toxicated you. As a result of this toxication your brain has got temporarily frazzled.

I must emphasize the word temporarily you are 18. You might have weak P450 enzymes but pretty much every component in your body is new and will be very strong and resistant.

So what to do..

immediately stop taking any ilicit drugs this includes MD analogs, speed, coke, psychedelics and particularly WEED anything ilegal axe it as of now or pay a very very heavy price.

Everytime you attempt to even go near someone who is smoking weed you are taking a major health risk. THC has properties that can wiesel scitzophrenia out of you like a fly to a piece of shit. You do not want to trigger scitzophrenia because if you think you feel awful now imagine having bats flying at you and hearing voices screaming in your ear 24/7. If you trigger that you effectively write your life off.

It would appear that your metabolism is not good at breaking down drugs for what ever reason. Drugs are not for you period. I am not anti drugs in any way you will look at numerous posts I write informing people how to safely take drugs but for you my friend if you take any more drugs you are literally playing Russian Roulette.

Next axe all that shite medication given to you by the GP. If you are on any antidepressants or anti psychotics you need to come off those slowly.

Have a reserve of benzodiapines and Z drugs such as zopiclone for emergency. If you live with your parents or a girl friend get them to hide these drugs from you and only use them when absolutely necessary.

No smoking, alcohol, caffeine or sugar remove all sugary drinks, foods etc from your diet.

For diet I will ask for Cope on those suggestions as he knows more than me about this.

Next order the following: (this is my personal recommendation please conduct your own research if required, we all have our own prefeences for supps, bluelight also has good suggestions)

http://www.vitabiotics.com/Neurozan/
Piracetam
Choline
Lithum
Omega 3
Krill Oil
Again if you feel appathy and cannot be bothered to order this stuff get a friend or parent to help you everything listed is very important. In regards to the lithium do not take any until you have spoken about dose etc. the mechanics of it are strange we will explain later for now just order it.

Start an exercise regime like you have never known before you need to hit the gym at least once per day and you ideally need to combine this with some outdoor pursuits such as running, cycling, walking etc. If you are suffering from appathy you need to get a friend to go with you and force you to do it.

Exercise is a critical part of your recovery. In summary you need to give you body every fighting chance to repair your brain. It is only temporary it may feel like living hell right now but be strong you will get through this.

You have come to Bluelight because you were looking for help. You were looking for help because truly deep down you love yourself thats what you have to keep reminding yourself. You are not going to kill yourself you just have to ride out a tough time you can do it.

be strong mcmayo look ahead to that feeling of equilibrium again life can and will be beautiful you just need time.

cope will contact you tomorrow with his own guidance and some diet advice.

Take care pm me anytime for skype info if you are in dire straits you can skype me anytime. If i am asleep i will skype you back as soon as i wake.

So you have some stuff to do now without further a do. Make a move my friend.

Pm me as soon as you can.

Good luck

Futura