Advice Where do heterosexual men meet women in this era?

[Trippymouse88]

And where's the people who wants a relationship but just wanna start KNOWING a person? more or less slowly, because they are not crazy nor desperate?
They don't exist? I guess they are not common in online dating, that's why I won't get there again.
I don't like infidelity in general, I wouldn't like to that to be honest as I wouldn't like to be a in "open" relationship. If loyalty is out the window..
bad thing is the interesting women I find, who seem honest, happy, well-hearted, and beautiful, none are single and quite a few are married...

they don't exist anymore when you can swipe right and just get whatever you want or will settle for. We live in a world driven by instant gratification and dating became hyper competitive. you wanna keep em time is now


Monogamy is boring to me and for the lifestyle I enjoy poly relationships are better require open and honest communication needs high level of emotional maturity to succeed and forces you to let go of possessiveness and jealousy. I also believe people can love more then one person. If someone loves me I shouldn't have to put them on a leash or have an unspoken ultimatum which conventional relationships do. I can be loyal to someone and not be sexually exclusive and that goes both ways. Just because people have multiple partners doesn't mean you cant all be involved and anyone has to be left out. Theres a ton to it and so much to learn about it most people hear multi partners I'm out without ever taking a chance to understand but it's also not for everyone and that's okay too

 

[Opi_Kid_Rock]

they don't exist anymore when you can swipe right and just get whatever you want or will settle for. We live in a world driven by instant gratification and dating became hyper competitive. you wanna keep em time is now


Monogamy is boring to me and for the lifestyle I enjoy poly relationships are better require open and honest communication needs high level of emotional maturity to succeed and forces you to let go of possessiveness and jealousy. I also believe people can love more then one person. If someone loves me I shouldn't have to put them on a leash or have an unspoken ultimatum which conventional relationships do. I can be loyal to someone and not be sexually exclusive and that goes both ways. Just because people have multiple partners doesn't mean you cant all be involved and anyone has to be left out. Theres a ton to it and so much to learn about it most people hear multi partners I'm out without ever taking a chance to understand but it's also not for everyone and that's okay too

These types of “open” relationships usually involve one party becoming more jealous than the other due to having/engaging in more options. There’s an underlying element of jealousy I believe. Just an opinion, not more.

 

[jasperkent]

Man same here but every time I message them back the want my credit card and I start getting pop ups!?!

I don't have a credit card and I never have. So I guess I'm shit outa luck with these hot chicks that are dying to fuck me.

 

[Trippymouse88]

I don't have a credit card and I never have. So I guess I'm shit outa luck with these hot chicks that are dying to fuck me.

same boat

These types of “open” relationships usually involve one party becoming more jealous than the other due to having/engaging in more options. There’s an underlying element of jealousy I believe. Just an opinion, not more.

Yeah it happens to the best of us i just really fucking hate relationships at this point not even bitter from any bad shit just don’t get the satisfaction I was with this new chick a few weeks ago and 40 and 3 kids but bomb chick, hot tighter then the 20yos I been with in the last year great sex but I just hated it luckily she came over a few times and bounced I just ain’t made for it

 

[-=SS=-]

Yeah, it's exactly that
it's so sad it REALLY depresses me, just looking at those super shitty, super entitled and vacuous profile, without even a taste of what they are really passionate about.
I always wonder... What are you passionate about in life? What moves them to live? What dreams do you have, what project do you have? Is your life really watching Netflix and doing yoga or pilates (at most)? In the case of finding a person with more "intellectual" interests it seems that it is pretentious and pedantic, not really because she has curiosity and real, humble, interest ...
Not saying that a person who does "nothing" in her life must be boring, but they don't deliver almost anything (and very often they seem overdemanding)

The irony is I would love to have a genuinely 'boring' woman, in the sense she is similar to my boring; being able to just sit in silence, think about things, go for contemplative walks, read. People try to fill their lives with all this noise and activity, thinking they're making music, but they've completely forgotten that all music requires the silence between the notes for it to be music and not just noise. That's all I see when I look at the majority of people (not just women). Noise.

What happens when you can no longer produce, or afford, to make that cacophony of noise for them? They hear silence, something they actively try to avoid, and then they inevitably project their failure on to you instead. Fuck that.

Unfortunately the real issue here isn't with women or dating. It's just that our society is garbage and is completely inverted from what we ought to be as human beings.

 

[Neuroborean]

The irony is I would love to have a genuinely 'boring' woman, in the sense she is similar to my boring; being able to just sit in silence, think about things, go for contemplative walks, read. People try to fill their lives with all this noise and activity, thinking they're making music, but they've completely forgotten that all music requires the silence between the notes for it to be music and not just noise. That's all I see when I look at the majority of people (not just women). Noise.

What happens when you can no longer produce, or afford, to make that cacophony of noise for them? They hear silence, something they actively try to avoid, and then they inevitably project their failure on to you instead. Fuck that.

Unfortunately the real issue here isn't with women or dating. It's just that our society is garbage and is completely inverted from what we ought to be as human beings.

Reading your comment I thought that my comments could be read/interpreted as sexist, when they really are not. The point is that, even though it is clear that those attitudes and styles are of today's people, I don't care how the male gender behaves, at least when it comes to flirting. I know most people are pretty deplorable in what you say about "cacophony", mostly because they have no inner peace and therefore need to cover up that blight somehow, rather than delve into self-knowledge or something "quiet".

Actually if you think about it substance use is for many people a way to cover up their own noise, or in certain cases a way to produce noise (like cokeheads or meth addicts who are social, social drinkers...).

The point is that I know who I am and I have few friends, those I have are real people, with whom I could be at peace, in a fun or "boring" way, as you say (reading looks boring because nobody does it nowadays!).

Funny what you say about music as I think about that a lot, I play piano and I have adhd (so my mind roams fast usually), I really like jazz so sometimes I "play a lot of notes" but I try even through the chaos or noise to come up with a meaning, a space and a moment for silence. From silence can come transformation.

 

[xtcgrrrl]

The irony is I would love to have a genuinely 'boring' woman, in the sense she is similar to my boring; being able to just sit in silence, think about things, go for contemplative walks, read. People try to fill their lives with all this noise and activity, thinking they're making music, but they've completely forgotten that all music requires the silence between the notes for it to be music and not just noise. That's all I see when I look at the majority of people (not just women). Noise.

What happens when you can no longer produce, or afford, to make that cacophony of noise for them? They hear silence, something they actively try to avoid, and then they inevitably project their failure on to you instead. Fuck that.

Unfortunately the real issue here isn't with women or dating. It's just that our society is garbage and is completely inverted from what we ought to be as human beings.

I love the way you phrased this! I myself tend to talk a lot, but sometimes it is just a way of covering up my anxiety. If I’m comfortable enough to be SILENT with you, that’s everything!

 

[fastandbulbous]

Mentioned somewhere else:
20mg of dexedrine and a slightly too big lump of hash. Went to rock bar, to see band (INXS cover band). When hash hit, was basically away with the fairies. Kept getting bumped around by crowd. Going home in taxi, supposed mate informs me, it wasn't the crowd bumping me, it was a small, 40something cute blond, who kept pushing her arse into my crotch. Not a fucking clue. I'm thinking I don't deserve to meet a woman (also reevaluating his status as a mate!)

 

[fastandbulbous]

Reading your comment I thought that my comments could be read/interpreted as sexist, when they really are not. The point is that, even though it is clear that those attitudes and styles are of today's people, I don't care how the male gender behaves, at least when it comes to flirting. I know most people are pretty deplorable in what you say about "cacophony", mostly because they have no inner peace and therefore need to cover up that blight somehow, rather than delve into self-knowledge or something "quiet".

Actually if you think about it substance use is for many people a way to cover up their own noise, or in certain cases a way to produce noise (like cokeheads or meth addicts who are social, social drinkers...).

The point is that I know who I am and I have few friends, those I have are real people, with whom I could be at peace, in a fun or "boring" way, as you say (reading looks boring because nobody does it nowadays!).

Funny what you say about music as I think about that a lot, I play piano and I have adhd (so my mind roams fast usually), I really like jazz so sometimes I "play a lot of notes" but I try even through the chaos or noise to come up with a meaning, a space and a moment for silence. From silence can come transformation.

I prefer Eric Morcambe's response to Andre Previn, in one of their xmas specials, "look sunshine, I am playing the correct notes, just not neccesarily in the correct order!"

 

[Oldskipper]

I hate the online dating thing, not my cup of tea. In my country theres a smoking ban and most bars will have a designated smoking area. Smoking areas are great places to strike up conversations with women (and blokes if thats your thing)
Tip: Always have a lighter or two in your pocket, thank me later.

 

[assclass]

you can meet women anywhere if they want to be met. which largely involves not being a disgusting, poor, low class man.

 

[Sweet Jane78]

If you live in the US, there’s a social site called MEETUP that is pretty cool. So many different activity groups to choose from.