When will I feel normal

[ElleAZ]

It's been seven months for me and I still have insomnia and temp issues. I also have muscle spasms throughout my body and my heart jumps randomly.

I hate the temp thing. My skin either feels a layer of heat, or it's cold all the way through.

I used a 9 day sub detox and jumped at 2mg on Christmas Eve last year.

 

[yubacity]

Good morning Yuba,

I was thinking about you and would love to hear an update! Hope you're doing well my friend!!

Hugs,
Ash.

How it going ash I'm doing well hope you are too.Took a big step yesterday threw all my lyrica away plus the valium.Have to say it was hard and the second time I done it since Feb wd.Felt real this time just started feeling positive last few weeks.For the first time in 27 years I'm happy in my sobriety.How you been since we last chat hope all is going well.

 

[yubacity]

hi yubacity, hope you are better!
i think sleep related problems are different to everybody - so many factors you know?
metabolism, water intake, length of time using etc. etc.

i quitted horse but not really cause i was put on subutex 24 hours into withdrawal so cant comment on that -
but i did stopped subutex 3 times (unsuccessfully) for months at a time and for me the insomnia lasted for about 2 months -
but i was not educated enough. i didnt drink a lot of water and my diet was not right,
i spent nights in front of a bright computer screen and didn't take my brotizolam as i stupidly tried to quit subutex and benzos at the same time - not recommended! i discovered the hard way that one drug at a time is the right way for me and i think to many others..
maybe try to google "sleep hygiene" if you haven't already -
very good advices on getting more sleep..
drink lots of water and eat right, maybe it will not make much of a difference but couldn't hurt i think...

hope that helps even a tiny bit.. good luck bro,
jona

Thanks for the advice mate I am now drink8ng loads of water also have ordered gotu cola as well.I could breeze through a wd if not for anxiety and sleep issues they the ones that I think we all find the worst.Keep strong mate life without using is much better I'm finally got that 8n my head.Before I was clean but just wanted to use now starting to enjoy sobriety not felt this good since February withdrawal.I have said it before this site has saved me getting back on it because after wd it's the depression and fatigue and general not being happy in any way that without this site I would have thought I can't do this

 

[yubacity]

It's been seven months for me and I still have insomnia and temp issues. I also have muscle spasms throughout my body and my heart jumps randomly.

I hate the temp thing. My skin either feels a layer of heat, or it's cold all the way through.

I used a 9 day sub detox and jumped at 2mg on Christmas Eve last year.[/QUOTE My body temp not back to normal yet I get cold easy and it's summer.Another thing with me I can't eat big meals I get so bloated.But i can live with it it's a lot easier the using everyday.congratulations on quitting only advice I can offer is don't think you can use occasionally I tried being a weekend user and it never works.

 

[EPL1]

HELLO MY DEAR FRIEND!!!

I am so happy to hear how well you're doing Yuba, so so proud of you as you should be too!! I am well, starting to feel happy again, that took some time, regulating normally again I hope! Whatever that means!!! ; )

Hugs,
your friend,
Ash.

How it going ash I'm doing well hope you are too.Took a big step yesterday threw all my lyrica away plus the valium.Have to say it was hard and the second time I done it since Feb wd.Felt real this time just started feeling positive last few weeks.For the first time in 27 years I'm happy in my sobriety.How you been since we last chat hope all is going well.

 

[yubacity]

HELLO MY DEAR FRIEND!!!

I am so happy to hear how well you're doing Yuba, so so proud of you as you should be too!! I am well, starting to feel happy again, that took some time, regulating normally again I hope! Whatever that means!!! ; )

Hugs,
your friend,
Ash.

It's good to hear you feeling happy again at times it feels like we be miserable forever just feels so good to be clean and happy.

 

[EPL1]

ABSOLUTELY RIGHT!!! So proud of you, you know!! I'm happy you're feeling good too my friend!!! What have you been up to lately?

Hugs,
Ash.

It's good to hear you feeling happy again at times it feels like we be miserable forever just feels so good to be clean and happy.

 

[yubacity]

ABSOLUTELY RIGHT!!! So proud of you, you know!! I'm happy you're feeling good too my friend!!! What have you been up to lately?

Hugs,
Ash.

Not much mate work Monday to Friday and weekend with family.How are your sleep patterns ash mine are slowly getting back to normal.

 

[EPL1]

Good morning Yuba!!!

Yes, just like you my sleep is getting better, although I still get crazy vivid dreams, oh well, I'll take it if I can sleep right!!?? Do you also find you are more n tune with real emotions now?? I do and I like it, I think it's what I notice and enjoy the most..

Have a wonderful weekend with your family my friend, I bet they're noticing a change in you and really like it!! Things will only continue to improve!!!

Keep it up, you're amazing!!

Hugs,
Ash.

Not much mate work Monday to Friday and weekend with family.How are your sleep patterns ash mine are slowly getting back to normal.

 

[EPL1]

Yuba,

Btw, I got up early today,

it took me 2 hours, but I read through your entire thread.

What an INCREDIBLE journey you have been on, back here again to tell you how much I respect you. You had trials and tribulations but you kept going, great will power, and a fabulous attitude you have. I hope you have the BEST day YUBA!!!!

Hugs,
your friend,
here for you always,
Ash.

 

[yubacity]

Good morning Yuba!!!

Yes, just like you my sleep is getting better, although I still get crazy vivid dreams, oh well, I'll take it if I can sleep right!!?? Do you also find you are more n tune with real emotions now?? I do and I like it, I think it's what I notice and enjoy the most..

Have a wonderful weekend with your family my friend, I bet they're noticing a change in you and really like it!! Things will only continue to improve!!!

Keep it up, you're amazing!!

Hugs,
Ash.

Thanks mate you have been a massive help .I was ready to use again was fed up with feeling depressed and i was thinking the only way to feel better was to get back on it.But reading about you going through the same things I was but holding strong helped me keep at it and now I'm so grateful to you.The best feeling I get is not feeling a prisoner to opium and how clear headed I am.On the weekend now I plan to go out with my wife and kids instead of waiting for them to go to town so I could be alone and do my gear.

 

[yubacity]

Yuba,

Btw, I got up early today,

it took me 2 hours, but I read through your entire thread.

What an INCREDIBLE journey you have been on, back here again to tell you how much I respect you. You had trials and tribulations but you kept going, great will power, and a fabulous attitude you have. I hope you have the BEST day YUBA!!!!

Hugs,
your friend,
here for you always,
Ash.

I go through this thread myself sometimes whenever I get a strong craving.It helps because it brings it all back and reminds me how low I felt and never get in that position again.

 

[EPL1]

You have NO IDEA how happy I am to hear that you haven't given in, DON'T...Come here vent to me, pm me...whatever, I get it. I know things seem tedious and boring right now, for me too, but when you stuff your feelings and emotions for so long you forget how much better life could and should be. I know not right now, things aren't 100 for me either, I'm more depressed too, but this won't last, I promise.



Believe me when I say you and your family are so much better off!! I am so amazingly proud of you for not saying "Fuck it" That would be too easy though...; ) You got this Yuba....

Here for you always,
your friend, Ashley.

P.S, your wife and children have a great husband and father in you, we all struggle, but you are holding it together and doing a great job. Stay strong my friend!!!

Thanks mate you have been a massive help .I was ready to use again was fed up with feeling depressed and i was thinking the only way to feel better was to get back on it.But reading about you going through the same things I was but holding strong helped me keep at it and now I'm so grateful to you.The best feeling I get is not feeling a prisoner to opium and how clear headed I am.On the weekend now I plan to go out with my wife and kids instead of waiting for them to go to town so I could be alone and do my gear.

 

[yubacity]

You have NO IDEA how happy I am to hear that you haven't given in, DON'T...Come here vent to me, pm me...whatever, I get it. I know things seem tedious and boring right now, for me too, but when you stuff your feelings and emotions for so long you forget how much better life could and should be. I know not right now, things aren't 100 for me either, I'm more depressed too, but this won't last, I promise.



Believe me when I say you and your family are so much better off!! I am so amazingly proud of you for not saying "Fuck it" That would be too easy though...; ) You got this Yuba....

Here for you always,
your friend, Ashley.

P.S, your wife and children have a great husband and father in you, we all struggle, but you are holding it together and doing a great job. Stay strong my friend!!!

Thanks mate you are a massive help with my recovery your words keep me focused.Right now it's 4 45 in the .morning I had 6 hours of natural no benzos or lyrica sleep.The sun was coming up I my thoughts were telling me this would have been really good to be using again watching the sun cone up wife and kids asleep.I come on here read your message and my thoughts changed to my recovery.Now I'm thinking how good I feel in this position and how even though I did my duty as a husband and father paid the bills holidays to India and they would visit my family and her family in the states.
I would not go because I was a addict and worried how would I gets some in the states. so my family holidays were to India where I had no problem getting raw opium which Punjabis call afeem.Now my thoughts turn to staying clean.I thought my using only affected me but it had a affect on family.My wife has been telling me we should move back to the states.It is a good idea my family and hers live in Yuba city California. My own selfiness has kept her away from her family and kids away from their grand parents and cousins.My using has made my kids life a blurr they have never had a clean dad my daughter is 11 she the oldest a son of eight and daughter who five.They love me a lot how could they not I was the chilled out dad never shouted got them what they wanted.Now I'm clean my personality has changed I'm not the same person.Today I was driving with them and a car cut me up I just flipped out to the point of both stopping get out of cars and nearly having a punch up.That was a shock to kids I always the mellow one.I am worried how it affect them seeing a change in their dad.Well ash I hope you staying strong fighting the cravings you a massive help to me.Im going to have a early morning joint. I know my wife be happy today going to tell her we moving back to the states.Going to miss the UK loved the people it's where I was born and spent my early childhood gives it's people free healthcare which pulled me out of a car put me in ambulance treatment of injuries in hospital and walking out and no bill not pay a single penny the brits should be proud of their national health service a great institution.Enjoy your Sunday mate I'm going to spend it having a barbecue getting stoned and watching the world cup.

 

[SoCal424]

Hi Yuba-

You wrote:

I just flipped out to the point of both stopping get out of cars

You will get past this emotional roller coaster. It just takes time, and the mellow in you will come back. You came off more than one addiction and that can create a lot of anxiety and stress, but it's worth it Yuba. You don't ever want to repeat the suffering you felt during this past month. Remember how tough the withdrawals were when you feel like giving up. Then, promise yourself that you will give this more time. It look more me around two months before I felt good again, but when I did, I felt So Much Better. I want you to feel good again like I do.

Think about your future without additions - can you picture what it's like in a perfect life for yourself? Not worrying about travel because of drugs, not bowing out of going places because you want to use. Imagine not even thinking about your addictions anymore, because you will start forgetting about those things in your past. For those times you always stayed home and used, you need to fill those times with new good memories. Make yourself get up and go when your family goes out. It will help you. If you feel too much stress while driving still, let your wife drive and don't look at the traffic.

A wonderful life awaits you - keep reaching for it with all your heart.
Your BL friend,
Dale

 

[EPL1]

Hello my dear friend Yuba,

You have no idea how happy I am to hear you making these positive changes, the move back to the US will be good for ALL of you, not just your family. You can make new drug free memories there, start anew.

Your kids and wife love you so much and your kids are still young, they just want YOU around. Kids are very resilient...Okay? So no more looking back, we all could have done better in some way in life. Big fucking deal, you screwed around for awhile, but the good thing about you personally is that you acknowledge your selfish behavior and you ARE making serious and amazing changes..

No worries about your angry outburst in the car....just like me, your emotions are coming back, they were masked before but that won't last long. It will all settle down. I promise.


Be kind and patient to yourself, you have made a world of difference in your wife's and your children's lives!!! But most importantly in your own!!! You are fantastic!!!!!!

Love and strength,
So proud of you and here for you always,
your friend,
Ash.

Have a great bbq, and lots of fun watching soccer!! My team lost today but has another shot tomorrow!!!

Thanks mate you are a massive help with my recovery your words keep me focused.Right now it's 4 45 in the .morning I had 6 hours of natural no benzos or lyrica sleep.The sun was coming up I my thoughts were telling me this would have been really good to be using again watching the sun cone up wife and kids asleep.I come on here read your message and my thoughts changed to my recovery.Now I'm thinking how good I feel in this position and how even though I did my duty as a husband and father paid the bills holidays to India and they would visit my family and her family in the states.
I would not go because I was a addict and worried how would I gets some in the states. so my family holidays were to India where I had no problem getting raw opium which Punjabis call afeem.Now my thoughts turn to staying clean.I thought my using only affected me but it had a affect on family.My wife has been telling me we should move back to the states.It is a good idea my family and hers live in Yuba city California. My own selfiness has kept her away from her family and kids away from their grand parents and cousins.My using has made my kids life a blurr they have never had a clean dad my daughter is 11 she the oldest a son of eight and daughter who five.They love me a lot how could they not I was the chilled out dad never shouted got them what they wanted.Now I'm clean my personality has changed I'm not the same person.Today I was driving with them and a car cut me up I just flipped out to the point of both stopping get out of cars and nearly having a punch up.That was a shock to kids I always the mellow one.I am worried how it affect them seeing a change in their dad.Well ash I hope you staying strong fighting the cravings you a massive help to me.Im going to have a early morning joint. I know my wife be happy today going to tell her we moving back to the states.Going to miss the UK loved the people it's where I was born and spent my early childhood gives it's people free healthcare which pulled me out of a car put me in ambulance treatment of injuries in hospital and walking out and no bill not pay a single penny the brits should be proud of their national health service a great institution.Enjoy your Sunday mate I'm going to spend it having a barbecue getting stoned and watching the world cup.

 

[yubacity]

Hello my dear friend Yuba,

You have no idea how happy I am to hear you making these positive changes, the move back to the US will be good for ALL of you, not just your family. You can make new drug free memories there, start anew.

Your kids and wife love you so much and your kids are still young, they just want YOU around. Kids are very resilient...Okay? So no more looking back, we all could have done better in some way in life. Big fucking deal, you screwed around for awhile, but the good thing about you personally is that you acknowledge your selfish behavior and you ARE making serious and amazing changes..

No worries about your angry outburst in the car....just like me, your emotions are coming back, they were masked before but that won't last long. It will all settle down. I promise.


Be kind and patient to yourself, you have made a world of difference in your wife's and your children's lives!!! But most importantly in your own!!! You are fantastic!!!!!!

Love and strength,
So proud of you and here for you always,
your friend,
Ash.

Have a great bbq, and lots of fun watching soccer!! My team lost today but has another shot tomorrow!!!

Thanks mate I had a great Sunday good food and football on tv.Told my wife and kids we moving back to the states they over the moon.Im exited about moving back but also a bit worried I originally m9ved to the UK because I was using to much crank.I feel really good at moment but since I quit I been convincing myself I have terminal illness don't know why but I keep thinking of not seeing my kids become adults guess my mind not straight yet

 

[EPL1]

Hang on Yuba,

With each day you're getting better, it doesn't seem like it, I know the feeling, but you had so many years of throwing drugs at your brain,body/soul that it is going to take some time to adjust..But I know you will, you've got this!!!

I am very happy your wife an chlldren are excited about the move. I understand your concern and worry about moving back, but no matter where you live just remember you have an excellent support system. Your wife and children and us on here. We are all here to support you okay? Lean on us.

Keep hanging tough my dear friend, so proud of you!!! Here for you anytime.

Hugs,
Ash.
Have a wonderful day!!!

Thanks mate I had a great Sunday good food and football on tv.Told my wife and kids we moving back to the states they over the moon.Im exited about moving back but also a bit worried I originally m9ved to the UK because I was using to much crank.I feel really good at moment but since I quit I been convincing myself I have terminal illness don't know why but I keep thinking of not seeing my kids become adults guess my mind not straight yet

 

[yubacity]

Hang on Yuba,

With each day you're getting better, it doesn't seem like it, I know the feeling, but you had so many years of throwing drugs at your brain,body/soul that it is going to take some time to adjust..But I know you will, you've got this!!!

I am very happy your wife an chlldren are excited about the move. I understand your concern and worry about moving back, but no matter where you live just remember you have an excellent support system. Your wife and children and us on here. We are all here to support you okay? Lean on us.

Keep hanging tough my dear friend, so proud of you!!! Here for you anytime.

Hugs,
Ash.
Have a wonderful day!!!

How's it going ash hope your doing well.Thanks for the support mate it helps a lot.Each day I'm clean the better I feel I know it will take a while to feel normal.At this moment I feel weird like I have woken from a deep sleep life feels more energetic.While we are using we don't realise how much we numb our brains it's only when we get clean we realise.I convinced myself not to worry about using it's me that has to keep self control drugs are everywhere we have to be the ones that don't use.Stay strong mate and enjoy your day

 

[EPL1]

Hello my dear friend Yuba,

I'm doing well, some days are better than others, I'm often bored,but I have also done a lot of things that I never would have while on my medication. I isolated a lot and put a lot of things off. Relationships, housework you name it...

Each day continues to get better. I like feeling real emotion now, do you find your feelings and emotions are more intense now? I totally relate to that numb feeling you mention.

I like that you realize that it's up to you whether to use or not...You are one tough guy Yuba and I know you will continue on this great path you've made for yourself!!!

Always very proud of you, here for you always.,
your friend,
Ash.

How's it going ash hope your doing well.Thanks for the support mate it helps a lot.Each day I'm clean the better I feel I know it will take a while to feel normal.At this moment I feel weird like I have woken from a deep sleep life feels more energetic.While we are using we don't realise how much we numb our brains it's only when we get clean we realise.I convinced myself not to worry about using it's me that has to keep self control drugs are everywhere we have to be the ones that don't use.Stay strong mate and enjoy your day