I know I always say these things when I'm happy.But this time I am focusing on the positives I have achieved such as detoxing instead of the positives from gear which are only ever going to be artificial.
When will I feel normal
- Thread starter yubacity
- Start date
How is everyone doing hope all is good.I am doing great the depression has lifted still tired but very manageable.Still getting cravings for gear but the important thing is I don't try to justify using in my mind.Instead I think it's not worth the high because it just brings me pain afterwards.Started eating healthy fruit salad for breakfast and whole grains and lean meat for other meals.Was going to go to a meeting got there early waited in car and saw someone I know walk in to the salvation army hall.chickened out will look for meeting a little further from home.Stay strong everyone enjoy the last of the summer clean
Good good,
You're thinking much more positively, I love that!!
Are your momma and your wife still with you Y?
Have a great day today, you're doing so well and I'm always so proud of you!!
Hugs,
your friend,
Ash.
You're thinking much more positively, I love that!!
Are your momma and your wife still with you Y?
Have a great day today, you're doing so well and I'm always so proud of you!!
Hugs,
your friend,
Ash.
Thamks for your kind words ash they always give me a lift.How are you doing Ashley hope you having a good week.My mom is leaving Sunday she has to go back my dad not well.The Oldman has made a deal with god get me better he will never drink or eat meat again and become a baptised Sikh.This is going to sound bad but I had the biggest lift after my brother told me at least he gives a shit.I am feeling kind of normal again got energy back today no depression and the best result so far is im scared to even try lyrica again fuck that head fuck.I am trying not to think how im going to get through life clean I just think every morning im not using today and its working so far.Enjoy your day ash hope its pain free.
Thanks for the kind words Yuba,
How are things now that your mom went back? Is your wife still there, are you staying on the straight and narrow okay? Feel free to type anytime if you're struggling. I haven't heard from you in a few days so I hope you're okay.
One day at a time my friend.
Hugs,
Ash.
How are things now that your mom went back? Is your wife still there, are you staying on the straight and narrow okay? Feel free to type anytime if you're struggling. I haven't heard from you in a few days so I hope you're okay.
One day at a time my friend.
Hugs,
Ash.
How you doing ash how your pain management going hope you feeling some improvement. Mom has gone back just me and my wife.Still clean apart from weed but am feeling good.Love this time with just me and wife.Sleep still a problem but I'm only taking 25mg of phenergan to nod of.Finding life easier since getting it in my head I can't use brown or lyrica recreationly I'm a junkie can't try to use once a week because it leads to days on it.How are you ash how is life treating you.
What you up to Ashley you having a good weekend.I can happily say I am doing pretty good.Spent yesterday in London with wife caught a train there only 40 mins journey.Asked a question here in feb of when will I feel normal I can now say I feel nearly normal and I like it.Still smoking a lot of weed but will try to cut down when I feel ready.It feels so good not to be ruled by a drug.Cravings come and go but they not that intense now I only get bad cravings if I pop in to see my mate he dont use in front of me but seeing him smashed gets me craving.Wife is on a mad one at the moment she wants to go Italy see all the sights in england I hate sight seeing but will have to put up with it.The only thing getting me down at moment is leaving the uk I loved my time here made great friends and loved the people.Have a lazy Sunday ash I plan on spending my day smoking weed and eating.
Hey Yuba,
Haven't seen a new update from you in a while so I hope things are going well?
Are you and your wife traveling?, if so I hope you're having a great time enjoying life, I bet your wife is loving the changes in you yuba!!!
Have a great day and update me please when you have time.
Love and support to you always,
your friend,
Ash.
Haven't seen a new update from you in a while so I hope things are going well?
Are you and your wife traveling?, if so I hope you're having a great time enjoying life, I bet your wife is loving the changes in you yuba!!!
Have a great day and update me please when you have time.
Love and support to you always,
your friend,
Ash.
How you doing mate hope all is good.We been to Ireland for a few days went to stay with my friend pats wife in limrick.Was good to see his family me his dad and brother had a drink and shed some tears for him.His father asked me a lot about him the hurt in him was so much.My 2ife loving the new me and im also loving my clean life.The cravings not even something to worry about now lost most of their intensity.The only regrets I have now is from 15 years old till 42 I wasted my youth on drugs.I can never get those years back I feel like I've suddenly come out of a long sleep and woke up a old man.But that not a big thing I'm loving life at the moment I can actually wake up and get on with the day not have to use to feel normal.How are you ash you was going to see a doctor about your pain management did he work something out
Hey Yuba,
Wow what a change in you, it's so good to see and to hear about, happy for you and your whole family, don't worry and spend any time worrying about what's been done, be happy you beat this and you have from here on out with your lovely family, another chance to make new memories with them.
Not gonna lie, things are tough for us chronic pain patients yuba, there's a war on us right now. I just keep plugging away, what else can I do?
Love ya,
Ash.
Wow what a change in you, it's so good to see and to hear about, happy for you and your whole family, don't worry and spend any time worrying about what's been done, be happy you beat this and you have from here on out with your lovely family, another chance to make new memories with them.
Not gonna lie, things are tough for us chronic pain patients yuba, there's a war on us right now. I just keep plugging away, what else can I do?
Love ya,
Ash.
BPD help plz
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Sep 27, 2018
- Messages
- 229
What is your secret?......i'm desperate to enjoy clean living....3 years clean (by default) and my mental health seems to be seeping away....like i'm a living corpse
I by no means have a secret to clean living I have struggled with relapses since detox.The big thing that I'm using now is healthy food and loads of exercise.I also stopped my shitty thought processes where I used to keep thinking I needed gear to be normal.Keep at it mate you have to find a system that works for you.You are 3 years clean even if by default you still clean that's an achievement by itself
How you doing Ashley hope your good.I spent a lot of my time since detox watching documentries on the opiate problem in the states.At first I was all for stopping the pills for pain management.But then I saw a documentary on people like yourself who need the meds because of chronic pain.They seemed to have tarred everyone with the same brush.Yes stop giving opiates for minor pain but don't punish the real patients who need opiates for pain.Have a good weekend ash
Hello hon!!!!
A law should have been put in place stating that documented intractable/chronic pain patients would not be affected by this so called war on opiates, which has really turned into a war on chronic pain patients and here it's an illicit fentanyl crisis. Period.
How are you doing Yu? You and the wife still travelling? Bet you're having a great time, and you deserve it too!!!!
Love to you and your family.
Hugs,
your friend, and here for you always,
Ash.
A law should have been put in place stating that documented intractable/chronic pain patients would not be affected by this so called war on opiates, which has really turned into a war on chronic pain patients and here it's an illicit fentanyl crisis. Period.
How are you doing Yu? You and the wife still travelling? Bet you're having a great time, and you deserve it too!!!!
Love to you and your family.
Hugs,
your friend, and here for you always,
Ash.
I love the states and am moving back.But it's a fucked up situation with its health care system.It seems so weird for me to suddenly have to get medical insurance for my wife and kids.This country health care is a right not a privalage and it's free.The big pharmaceutical company's have fucked the people up and when shit hit the fan the govermant took quick decisions and punished people like you.Hope it gets better for you ash you have such a kind heart and you will always be the person that stopped me on a relapse and got me to this place clean still not able to get a good night's sleep but happy.
I only done acid a few times.Im finally normal after 27 years I'm loving it but life is kind of boring.But a million times better then being addicted to a drug that needed to be taken everyday to be kind of normal.
I love you Yuba, and I am just very happy to hear that YOU are happy and that your family is well and you are excited to move back to the states.
Thank you for the kind words Yuba, I really do appreciate them, they mean a lot to me.
Keep up the great work my friend!!!!
Hugs,
your friend,
Ash.
Thank you for the kind words Yuba, I really do appreciate them, they mean a lot to me.
Keep up the great work my friend!!!!
Hugs,
your friend,
Ash.
I can not thank you enough ash.It was not long ago that I was in hell and had convinced myself that I will use again.You and Rio fantastic support and kind words stopped me going into that.You help so many people on here while having your own issues.I am indebted to you it's weird how my family could not do what you did.You was so right about me having to stop going to places where I would be tempted.Thanks so my ash this a soppy post but I can't thank you enough